


To Sir with love

by Mybelle2



Category: Take That (Band)
Genre: F/M, Falling In Love, Second Chances, Single Parents
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-11-26
Updated: 2021-02-10
Packaged: 2021-03-09 21:14:28
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 54
Words: 124,478
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27722645
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Mybelle2/pseuds/Mybelle2
Summary: Single mum Jess has moved to Manchester to escape her ex-husband and his past. Could her future be with Ruby's new teacher?
Relationships: Jason Orange/Original Female Character(s)
Comments: 13
Kudos: 2





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> Please note this story is purely fictional and does not relate to real life events. 
> 
> This story was created before the band and continued after he left.

TWO YEARS EARLIER...................................

Jason checked his watch one more time. Gary was late and he was hoping that he wasn't going to cancel at the last minute, because there was something urgent he wanted to talk to him about. In fact, he owed it to him to tell him how he was really feeling about the direction his life was going in. He was unhappy with the treadmill of being in the public eye and the constant pressures. Sometimes he felt like a hamster in a cage - simply there for other people's amusement, to be poked and prodded.

A couple of moments later Gary arrived in a flurry of apologies for being late. 'Ah Jeez Jay. I'm so sorry!' he said, apologising profusely for being so late. 'Fran was up all night with the baby and to be honest I overslept as I was kept awake too!' he said, hugging Jason tightly to him as he referred to his six week old daughter Mae and her lack of nightly routine.

'No, don't worry about it.' Jason said, extricating himself from Gary's bear hug. 'Come on. Let's get inside in the warm. It's bloody freezing out here!' he blew on his fingers, cursing the fact that he'd forgotten his gloves. Opening the door, he led the way into the crowded Costa Coffee situated on Kensington High Street.

Gary followed Jason to the counter, feeling somewhat confused as to what was so important that Jason had rung him asking to see him alone and at pretty short notice. He'd already noticed that Jason was avoiding his gaze and he tried to ignore the uneasy feeling that had settled into the pit of his stomach.

The two men ordered a Panini each and a pot of tea and ignoring the odd stare of curiosity from the people already in the cafe they sat at a table by the heavily steamed front window.

'What's on your mind?' Gary asked immediately, as soon as they settled into the comfy chairs opposite each other.

'What makes you think I've got something on my mind?' Jason asked, hating the fact that Gary could read him like a book.

'Ah, come on Jay. I've known you for how long? Over twenty years? I know the way you tick.' Gary settled back in the chair and stared unflinchingly at Jason, his arms crossed in front of his broad chest.

Jason sighed and pushed his wire glasses further up his nose, cursing to himself that his old age had at long last caught up with him, forcing him to wear glasses to correct his short-sightedness. 'I can't do it anymore, Gaz.'

'Can't do what Jay?' Gary asked, half guessing already what Jason was going to say. Call it intuition, but he'd had a feeling it was coming for quite a while. Mark and Howard were completely oblivious to Jason becoming ever more detached from them, but Gary had noticed it and it scared him. He hadn't said anything out loud to Jason, because to verbalise it would mean it was true.

'I can't do this fame thing any more Gary. I hate it. You saw people looking at us as we came in didn't you?'

Gary shook his head defiantly. 'No I didn't Jay.'

'Liar!'

'Jay, it's the truth. I zone out to it. Of course if someone comes up to me and asks for a photo I notice, but I guess over the years I've learnt to ignore the whispers.' Gary re-assured him. He felt sick as he realised that Jason was serious.

'I'm unhappy Gaz - really unhappy. I'm not an animal in a cage and that's how I feel!' Jason licked his lips as he tried to quell the feeling that he was going to cry. Gary looked like his entire world was about to cave in and he felt like a complete shit, because it was him that was about to throw the grenade in and walk away as it exploded in the faces of the three men in the world that he loved the most, apart from his brothers Tom and Jacob.

'Yeah, but you're a lot more sensitive than us three - you always have been.' Gary leant back in his chair to allow the waitress to place the two plates in front of them both before continuing; 'You always get over it and we get back to work,' he said, referring to Jason's "little wobbles" as the rest of the band jokingly called them.

'Gaz. Stop! I can't do it anymore. You know when we were touring with Progress and we'd go on the B Stage?'

Gary nodded as he remembered back to Jason refusing point blank to sing his line in Never Forget and Gary having to take over.

'I couldn't deal with it. All those girls screaming. All those banners saying they loved me. I just can't deal with it anymore. I'm a man and I'm not perfect and these girls want to imagine me as the perfect man who is the answer to their dreams if I invited them back to my hotel room. I'd love to take some random girl back to my room and fuck her, but I daren't.'

'Didn't stop you in the old days.....' Gary trailed off and then shut up as he saw the grim expression on Jason's face.

'Yeah but I was different then. I couldn't care less.I was young back then. I'm different now and I feel trapped. If I shag someone because I feel like it, I have to risk that I'll be splashed all over the papers the next day. I want a normal life and a normal relationship and I feel like I'm never going to get that while I'm in the band.'

'So you want to leave?' Gary said and pushed his plate away. He suddenly didn't feel very hungry anymore as the reality of the band minus Jason sank in.

'Yes. I want to leave.' Jason whispered quietly and wiped a tear away. 'I'm sorry. I've let you guys down, but I wanted to tell you first so you can help me tell the others. You're my best mate and I felt you should know first.'

'Well thanks for that,' Gary said bitterly, thinking that Jason had taken the gutless way out, but understanding why he had told him first. If he'd faced the three of them as a united front he may have wavered as he'd always done in the past.

'I'm sorry to put you in a position Gaz, but you'll be fine. After all, the press say I do bugger all anyway!' he laughed bitterly as he tried to hide the hurt that he was often branded as the one who contributed the least to the band. 'You have to go on - for the fans.'

'Well I don't know about that.' Gary muttered, his heart torn as he tried to work out what Mark and Howard would want to do.'

'You'll do great. I know it.'

'And what will you do?'

'Go back to school Gaz. Well, I have a confession to make. Remember when I was papped coming out of Manchester Met?' he said, referring to his photo appearing in the papers as he left the University in his home-town.

Gary nodded, 'yeah, you said you were visiting your old teacher when we asked you what you were doing there.'

'I lied. Well sort of.'

'Well I can see that now.' Gary shot back sarcastically.

'I've enrolled in a teacher training programme.'

'You? Teach?'

'Yes. I'm going to teach music.' Jason tried to hide how pleased he felt to have been accepted onto their programme. 'My old music teacher has mentored me and suggested that I be fast-tracked due to my previous music experience.'

'And I thought the press reckoned you don't do anything.' Gary couldn't help but slide that joke in, as he referred again to the fact that he was "the useless one". 'You can't be that useless to be fast-tracked onto the training programme.'

'I guess not.' Jason flushed self-consciously.

'And I can't change your mind?' Gary tried once more. 'The lads will be devastated.'

'That's why I've dragged my heels so long Gaz. I'm really, really sorry to mess you about, but I've done a lot of soul searching and it's for the best.'

'You'll always be welcome back, Jay. You know that don't you?'

'I do Gaz. Never say never, eh?' 

'Yeah, something like that Jay.' Gary stood up and walked around to Jason's side of the table. 'C'mere give us a hug mate.' He pulled Jason so that they were standing almost nose to nose and grabbed him into a big bear hug. 'Jay, you'll be fab - much as it pains me to say it.'

Several diners were by now openly gawping at the two of them hugging like two old women on a girly day out, unaware that they were having the tiniest glimpse into the group as it fell apart in front of them.

'See what I mean Gaz?' Jason raised an eyebrow and indicated towards the women who were by now nearly openly salivating at a table nearby. 'Like I said... No privacy. We'll be in the papers now and they'll be saying we're conducting an illicit gay affair and does your wife know?' he grinned at Gary and they both burst out laughing.

'Ha, I'm too good for you.' Gary joked, trying to hide the tears that had sprung to his eyes as they pulled apart. 

They walked out of the cafe together and made their way to the end of the street where Gary had parked his car. 'You in London at the moment then?' Gary asked, realising that Jason's familiar Gold Mercedes wasn't also parked nearby.

'No. I stayed here overnight so we could meet up.' They paused next to Gary's black land-rover and Jason held his arms out for another hug. 'Love you Gaz. You'll always be like a brother to me - you and the lads.' The tears rolled down both men's faces as they hugged each other tightly for what seemed an age.

'Love you too Jay. Now get on your way before we really are in the news. If anyone overheard us saying we love each other we'd definitely be on the front page of the newspaper tomorrow.' Gary chuckled and wiped the tears away from his eyes.

Without a backwards glance, Jason walked off into the distance to his mews house situated just off Kensington High Street. Gary bowed his head and got into his car, thankful of the tinted windows as he leant over the steering wheel and cried like a baby, as he wondered how the hell he was going to broach this with Mark and Howard.


	2. Chapter 2

Despite the fact that Gary had pre-warned Mark and Howard that Jason wanted to leave the band, their first meeting to thrash things out was acrimonious to say the least. They didn't take it as well as Gary had and Howard especially felt that Jason was letting them down and didn't hesitate in telling him, calling him a selfish bastard, who didn't give a shit that he was buggering everything up for them.

'Maybe I am being selfish, but I need to find myself and while I'm in the band I'm never going to work out who I am and what I want from life. I don't want to always be in a band. Nothing is private - I can't even go to the supermarket without having to look out for paps or fans. I can't take any more!' Jason finished the last part of his speech loudly as he tried to appeal to his three band-mates, to make them see how unhappy he had become.

'Was it Robbie coming back? Is that what made up your mind?' Howard's eyes narrowed as he tried to work out what exactly had been the catalyst to Jason's decision. He'd always known that Jason and Robbie sometimes didn't see eye to eye and was now kicking himself for not intervening when their verbal sparring had become heated.

'Part of it,' Jason shrugged in a gesture of defeat. 'It was one thing after another stacking up, until finally I couldn't take any more. The fans at the Trafford Centre who cornered me in the toilets so I had to climb out the window to escape, the fact I can't even make a doctors appointment without worrying that someone will leak to the press the information of whatever ailment I have and I guess the final nail in the coffin was the paps camping outside my Manchester flat and ruining things for me with Ruth,' he referred to the relationship which had been abruptly cut short by a girl he'd been seeing, because she couldn't take the constant press intrusion whenever they tried to be alone.'

'How long have you been feeling like this?' Mark asked quietly. He was horrified that Jason hadn't told them how he felt and by the looks of things it was too late and whatever they said he wasn't going to stay.

'A long time Markie. Two years probably. Why do you think I've been stalling about getting together and starting on the new album?' he held his hand up to silence Mark and continued speaking, 'the relentless treadmill of public appearances, the trying to pretend I'm happy when I'm not and then the touring - it's doing my head in and I have to get out.'

'So what are you going to do? Sit on park benches?' Howard said scornfully. 

'No. I'm going to teach music.' Jason said decisively.'I've already been accepted onto the training programme.'

'And you'll be good at it.' Gary said supportively. He hated the fact that they were losing someone they all loved and cared for, but for Jason's peace of mind and sanity he knew they had to step back and give him the chance he was asking for.

''I can't believe you're not trying to make him stay!' Howard's voice rose an octave. He couldn't understand how Gary could stand there and support Jason's decision.

'There's nothing I'd like more than for Jason to stay, but who are we to stop him persuing what he feels is right for him?' Gary said, looking supportively at Jason. It broke his heart that he was helping Jason walk away, but it was something he had to do.

'Well how about you go and start your course and us three meet with the company lawyers to hammer out an agreement for the division of loyalties and then we meet again in a couple of months? That way if you change your mind again there's still time to begin recording and the fans will have no inkling that you had second thoughts. What do you think?' Mark suggested diplomatically.

Jason knew exactly what Mark was trying to do. He knew that Mark was hoping that he would start his teacher training and find it wasn't what he was expecting it to be and return to the fold with his tail between his legs. He nodded slowly, thinking that it would give Mark, Gary and Howard time to get used to being a trio and also give them back a small feeling of control over the situation. 'OK. We'll meet up in eight weeks.'

Over the next two months Jason came to realise that he'd made the right decision in deciding to leave the band. He was loving the feeling of freedom and even though people still recognised him, it didn't feel the same. There had been curiosity at first from his fellow trainee teachers, but he'd simply said that he was training to teach music during the times when the band weren't recording together, to stop him getting bored and they seemed to believe his story.

They met up again as agreed eight weeks after the last band meeting and at the end Howard, Mark and Gary were in no doubt that Jason was leaving and that nothing they could say was going to change his mind. He was like a completely different person - he'd put on weight and he looked relaxed and happy.

'You will keep in touch won't you?' Mark asked hesitantly, at the end of the evening as Jason hugged his smaller frame against his lankier one.

'Of course. You haven't seen the last of me,' Jason assured him, patting him on the back as they parted. 'You never know, you might get an invite to perform at the Christmas school play if I pass my teaching exams.'

'Aww, you'll pass with flying colours. You always were the brainy one,' Mark teased, turning away so Jason wouldn't see him tearing up.

'If you don't keep in touch I'll hunt you down and fucking haunt you.' Howard grunted and winked at Jason just to show he was no longer angry with him.

'I wouldn't dare.' Jason retorted, grabbing Howard and hugging him, before doing the same to Gary. 'Thanks Gaz. I owe you big time,' he said quietly, as they pulled apart. 

'Yeah you do. It's been stressful to say the least, so you'd better be serious.' Gary remarked, shooting Jason a rueful look, thinking that Jason didn't know the half of it. It had taken weeks of wrangling with the record company lawyers to come up with a royalty agreement which was fair to both Jason and the rest of the band. I'll set the wheels in motion with the lawyers. Can you draft a statement to put in the press?'

'Course I can.' Jason said, feeling a mixture of trepidation and sadness that the decision had been made and there was now no turning back.

'You'll always be welcome back, Jay.' Howard said gruffly, swallowing down a lump in his throat as tears threatened. 

'I know. It means a lot that despite everything you're saying that,' Jason hugged Howard one last time and after saying goodbye he made his way outside to his car, leaving the other three sitting around the table in stupified silence. Starting the car engine, he sighed a deep sigh and set off to make the four hour long drive back to Manchester.


	3. Chapter 3

Jess's eyes flicked up to the clock on the kitchen wall. The time indicated that it was 8pm and once again Steve was late home from work. He'd been late every night for the past two weeks and his excuses were becoming less and less believable.

Tip-toeing upstairs, she quietly opened her daughter Ruby's bedroom door and smiled indulgently as she saw that she was already fast asleep, her thumb stuck firmly in her little rosebud mouth as she slept on oblivious to Jess watching her. Ruby was the light of her life - the best thing which had come from her turbulent marriage to Steve. Ruby was three years old and a little chatter-box and she helped keep her mind off the fact that their marriage wasn't everything she hoped it would be the day they married.

The day they'd married was one of the best of her life, only bettered when Ruby was born. At first things had been idyllic and Steve had been both a doting husband and father to Ruby when she'd been born a year after they'd married. Not long after they'd married, Steve had been offered a brilliant job offer in London and it had been too good to turn down. Without any hesitation, Jess had followed him to London and at first things had been good. She'd made some great friends and Ruby had settled in at the local nursery when she turned two. 

When Ruby turned three things started to change as Steve's job became more high-powered. He was promoted and spent longer hours at the office, as well having to travel abroad now and then too. Jess began to feel more and more isolated as Steve's attitude towards her changed and he became less loving towards both Ruby and Jess. Their sex life dwindled to almost nothing and the only time he showed her any affection was when he'd been to the pub on a Friday afternoon after work with his work colleagues. Jess put up with his beery, sour smelling alcohol ridden breath as he climbed on top of her and after a few thrusts which he enjoyed more than her, collapsed in a drunken stupour next to her and snored like a pig.

She was jolted out of her reverie as she heard the front door slam so hard that the house shook and Steve call up the stairs that he was home. As she gently closed the bedroom door, hoping that Ruby wouldn't awaken she walked down the stairs, her fingers to her lips to tell him to be quiet. 'Shush, Ruby's asleep.'

Steve swivelled around and fixed her with a stare. It was obvious that he'd had a drink and had driven home, judging by his rumpled clothes and the brief-case still clutched in his hand. 'Why's she in bed?' He looked momentarily confused at seeing her come down the stairs.

'It's gone 8 o'clock, Steve?'

'Is it?'

'Yes, where have you been? You're late again and your dinner's ruined.' Jess said, trying to keep a lid on her anger. She was sure she'd spotted lipstick on his neck and not for the first time. The last time he'd said that it must have been when he kissed his PA Cheryl and wished her happy birthday. She'd chosen to believe him that time - even though her instincts were telling her he was lying.

'Ah, me and Cheryl stayed late working. We got a Chinese so I'm not hungry anyway,' his gaze flickered away from her as he guiltily thought about what he and Cheryl had really been doing. He guessed shagging on his desk after everyone had gone home probably didn't count as working, but it sure as hell beat shagging Jess. When had she become so boring and mumsy? he turned over in his head as he looked at her standing in front of him in her Boyfriend style jeans and sweatshirt. Was it any wonder his dick wandered?

'And you didn't think to ring me?' Jess's voice raised an octave as she stood in front of him and put her hands on her hips.

'You hadn't cooked anything special had you?' 

'Well actually I'd cooked your favourite - Peppered steak and home-made chips. I thought I'd make an effort.' Jess thought back to the fact that she'd lit candles in the dining room and got Ruby into bed early in a botched attempt to seduce him. An hour earlier she'd also been kitted out in a black push up bra, black lacy thong and hold ups underneath a short skirt and sheer blouse. She'd had to admit defeat when he hadn't bothered to show by 7.45pm and had gone upstairs and dressed back in her comfy day clothes.

'I'm sorry Jess.'

Jess studied him, thinking he didn't exactly look sorry and she knew with a clarity of thought that he was having an affair - she just knew it.

'Are you having an affair Steve? You're having an affair with Cheryl, aren't you?'

Steve didn't even bother to try to lie to her. He didn't want the life he now had and a wife and kid simply weren't exciting enough for him. He wanted more. 'Yes. I am.'

'Why?' Jess whispered, her expression like a wounded animal as she looked at him with tears in her eyes.

'Aww come on Jess. You're not sexy any more. You don't make an effort in the way you dress any more. I mean, look at you!' he waved a hand in her direction disparagingly. 'Why would I want to fuck someone who's let herself go like you have? The only way I can get a hard-on is to have a few drinks before-hand. '

'But I made an effort tonight and you didn't turn up. I dressed nice for you and you didn't come home.' Jess choked the words out, her heart feeling like it was shattering in two as she heard his cruel taunts. 'How long has it been going on?'

'Around a year or so. I've been meaning to find a way to tell you that I want out. Well now that you've confronted me I might as well tell you now. I'm moving out.'

'You don't love me any more?' Jess still couldn't believe what she was hearing, despite the matter of fact way he was saying he was leaving.

'No. Not as I should.'

'What will I do? All my family are in Manchester and I have no job to support us!' Jess thought back to all the times she'd said she wanted to get a job and Steve had said that she should stay at home with Ruby, as he didn't believe mum's should work and here he was admitting to shagging his PA - a single mum with two kids. He was a mass of contradictions.

'Do what you want. But I'll still want to see Ruby now and then, so don't go too far.' Steve threw over his shoulder as he began to walk up the stairs to pack his belongings.

'You can't leave me. Not like this! I'll try harder. Please!!!' Jess chased after him, grabbing his arm to try to stop him.

'I'm leaving Jess. It's over.' Steve said in a tight voice, shaking her off him and continuing up the stairs and into their bedroom. 

Jess stood framed in the door-way watching helplessly, as he dragged a suitcase from where it was stored under the bed and began throwing clothes haphazardly into it. 'Where will you go? You have nowhere to live,' she stated, shivering uncontrollably with fear at being left without any warning.

'I'm moving in with Cheryl.' Steve glanced up at Jess, his face completely devoid of any emotion as she looked back at him. She was clearly upset and confused as tears rolled down her face, but he felt nothing but relief. 'Don't worry, I'll make sure your bills are paid, but you're gonna have to get a job and stop lazing around the house like you have been.'

'How fucking dare you!' Jess screeched at the top of her voice like a banshee. 'You wouldn't let me work you fucking cave-man!' she raised her hand to slap his face in anger at his words.

Steve caught her hand just as it was about to make contact with his cheek. 'You hit me and I won't be responsible for my actions Jess ' he warned, twisting her wrist away from him until she screamed in pain.

'Did you ever love me Steve?' Jess whispered, suddenly remembering Ruby in the room next door.

'At first. Until you got all slovenly and needy,' he chucked a couple of ties on top of his clothes and slammed the case shut. 'I'll call you when I'm settled about access and money,'pushing past Jess roughly, he strode purposefully down the stairs.

'Aren't you going to say goodbye to Ruby?' Jess called down the stairs, sprinting after him in an attempt to catch up with him.

'She's asleep - you said so yourself.' Steve threw over his shoulder as he reached the front door and Jess caught up with him.

'But she'll wonder where you are in the morning. You know she's a right daddy's girl.'

'She'll manage. After all I'll still see her at weekends.' Steve said unfeelingly. It wasn't that he didn't love Ruby - he did. He just didn't feel like he was cut out to be a perfect father or husband.

Throwing open the door, he picked up his case and looked at Jess. Her face was a picture of abject misery, but still he couldn't feel anything but annoyance at her for being needy in his eyes. 'You'll thank me one day - trust me.' 

Jess flinched as the door slammed shut behind him and she heard him start the engine of his car and drive away. She burst into tears, her whole body shuddering as she cried. She'd known things weren't right for a while, but she'd thought they were going through a rough patch.

Upstairs the door opened quietly and Ruby appeared at the top of the stairs. She could see her mum slumped against the front door and was frightened to see that she was crying. She tip-toed downstairs and knelt down in front of Jess, wrapping her chubby arms around her mum's knees. 'Mummy, why are you crying?' she asked, moving closer to her mum in an attempt to make her feel better.

Jess wiped her eyes instantly. She knew she couldn't tell Ruby the entire truth - not yet. She needed to be brave and act as if everything was normal or her daughter would be devastated and maybe blame herself as little kids sometimes did. 'Um mummy's missing daddy. That's all. He's had to go away with work for a little while, but he'll be back real soon..

'Promise?' Ruby's voice quivered as she asked the question and her bottom lip wobbled.

'Promise.' Jess assured her, not sure whether she even wanted him to come back. It was the only thing she could think of to say to stop her daughter worrying.


	4. Chapter 4

The following year was busy for both Jason and Jess. Jason was accepted to teacher train by a local primary and junior school called Irk Valley, fairly near to the area where he'd grown up as a child. After a few weeks where they were taken through what to expect at the University of Manchester and given the details of the work modules they would have to complete whilst doing their on the job training, he began working at the school. At first his arrival was greeted by a flurry of interest as he was immediately recognised by many of the parents. He was assigned to the year 2 students, shadowing the main teacher for the first year until he had completed enough training to take over his own class full time at the beginning of the following school year. He found it to be a fulfilling job and once interest had waned amongst the mums that he was there, they stopped "popping along, just for a chat about my son/daughter". He'd expected that he'd attract some unwanted attention and it had been a bit wearing at first, but eventually it had petered out and he'd settled in.

Jess and Steve had eventually divorced and after some legal wranglings regarding Steve's access to Ruby, she'd decided to move back up north to Crumpsall so she could be nearer to her family. Steve was still living with Cheryl and had Ruby alternate weekends, though his interest in having her over to stay seemed to be on the wane now that Cheryl was expecting their first child together. When Jess had broached the subject of moving back up to Manchester she'd expected him to cause a fuss, but instead he seemed to be positively encouraging it and said that instead of having Ruby every other weekend he'd simply have her over for a week at a time during the children's holidays.

She eventually found a cosy three bedroomed terraced house in Crumpsall, which was just about affordable on her salary. Steve's comments when he'd left her had made her all the more determined to get a job after they split up and she'd found a job as a PA for a local builder - a job she'd done prior to marrying Steve. They moved up to Manchester just after Ruby's 7th birthday and Jess immediately set about finding a school to enrol her at. She spoke to her sister Danni and she suggested taking a look at a couple of local schools and after Ruby and Jess had had a look around two they eventually plumped for Irk Valley. It was one of the closest to their house which was on Hallworth Road and could be walked to in around ten minutes. It was ideal because Jess's mum and sister only lived around the corner so they would be able to help with childcare too.

The Autumn term started on September 5th and Ruby was nearly beside herself with excitement at starting at her new school. A couple of Danni's friends had daughters in Ruby's class, so they'd met up prior to the girls returning to school. It helped that Ruby would know someone in her new class and it had made her all the more excited about beginning her new school. Jess took the day off on Ruby's first day and accompanied her to school. Ruby's teacher was a cheerful and attractive woman in her early sixties called Mrs Brown and Jess took an immediate liking to her.

After dropping Ruby off at school Jess walked slowly home, feeling somewhat lost at having her only daughter out of the house all day. She swung around as she heard someone calling her name at the top of her voice.

'Oh, hello!' she exclaimed as Danni's friend, Meg, caught up with her. 

'Hi.' Meg said in response. 'Did Ruby go in ok?'

'Yeah, she was so excited. I'm sure some of it is because she already knows Maisie,' she replied referring to Meg's daughter.

'And it also helped that she'd met Florence too.' Meg said, as she referred to the other little girl who belonged to Marie, one of Danni's friends, who she'd met up with on the same day she'd met up with Meg.

Jess nodded enthusiastically and grinned at Meg. 'Mrs Brown seems nice,' she remarked, scanning the road to check for cars, before they both began to cross.

'Yeah, she is. Shame she's retiring at Christmas though. Did you get the letter?'

Jess shook her head slowly as she dug around in the recesses of her mind as to whether she'd received an email. She knew she'd signed up to Parentmail, but correctly guessed that as Ruby had only just started at the school that an email had gone out prior to Ruby starting. Either that, or she'd simply missed the email in amongst all the paperwork with the move. 'I don't think I did. Have they got a teacher to replace her?'

Meg smiled an enigmatic smile which lit up her entire face. 'Oh yes, they have the gorgeous Mr O. That'll make parents evening much more interesting than staring into the eyes of a crusty old lady - nice as she is,' she added in after-thought, in case it looked like she was complaining about their present teacher.

'Mr O? Is he new?' Jess asked, thinking she didn't really want any more upheaval for Ruby - especially as she seemed to like Mrs Brown.

'No, he's not new. They had a bit of a shuffle around - he's just finished his teacher training and was helping Mrs Brown last year. We've all been dying to hear whether he'd just take over her class or whether he'd be given another year two class. Jess, he's bloody gorgeous. Seriously hot! Last year some of the mums were turning up in some verrrryyy skimpy outfits trying to catch his eye. He's either gay or taken, because he didn't bat an eyelid.'

'Or simply sick of the attention.' Jess interjected, feeling slightly sorry for this so called Mr O who all the mums had the hots for.

'Yeah maybe...' Meg trailed off, not sounding very convinced.

'So is he a good teacher? That's all I'm worried about, Jess asking, thinking that was the most important thing.

'With a face like his it wouldn't matter.' Meg laughed dirtily and raised her eyebrows before continuing. 'Actually yeah he is good. One of the mum's helped out in class and said he's a natural with the kids. He was teaching them music when she was there, but he does teach them in all the main subjects - it's just music's his thing. All he let slip is that he has a very big family, hence why he gets on so well with the kids.'

'Well I'll reserve judgement until I've met him.' Jess said decisively, thinking he could be as handsome as he liked, but if he was a crap teacher she wasn't about to let his good looks get in the way of her thoughts.

Meg smiled at her knowingly. She was tempted to tell Jess who the infamous Mr O really was, but thought it might be amusing to keep it quiet. Hopefully none of the other parents would let the information slip at the gates and Jess would be in for a very pleasant surprise when she at long last met him.

They parted at the top of Jess's road to go their separate ways. 'Do you fancy going out for a wine or two with me and Marie one night?' she suggested, guessing that Jess might fancy a girly night out. The three of them had really hit it off when they'd met properly for the first time just before the girls started school and Jess was grateful to her sister for putting her in touch with them. She'd been apprehensive about moving back home after all the years she'd spent in London, having lost touch with nearly all her friends in that time. Having two such nice women introduced to her had been a relief to say the least.

'Yeah, let me sort out a baby-sitter. How about Friday night if I can get one?' Jess replied, hoping her mum might agree to it.

'I'm sure that'll be fine. I'll mention it to Marie.' Meg consulted her watch and grinned at Jess. 'I'd better get a move on. I need to be at work in half an hour. I'll text you once I've spoken to Marie, OK?'

'Yes, I'll speak to mum in the meantime and if there's a problem let you know. Guess I'd better get a move on too - I've got stacks of housework to do once I've done a Tesco's shop.' Jess smiled wryly at Meg, 'the glam life we lead eh?' she chuckled. 

They hugged quickly and headed off in opposite directions. Jess spent the day shopping and doing her mountain of chores before returning back to the school at 3pm to pick Ruby up. Hurrying into the playground she threw a glance in the direction of the head-master as she hurried past in the direction of Ruby's classroom. He was talking to a tall man who was wearing metal-rimmed glasses and had a beanie hat pulled down over his ears to protect him from the lashing rain. Jess gave him a cursory glance and carried on in her mission to collect Jess. 

As they walked home Ruby skipped along-side Jess, swinging her pink princess PE bag as she chatted non-stop about her day. 'So what did you do?' Jess asked, gazing downwards fondly in her daughter's direction.

'We did maths and I came top in the test and then we did PE and we had to play rounders inside because it was too wet. Then we had lunch.'

'Well done on being top!' Jess said, really pleased that Ruby had done well. 'Was your lunch OK?' She asked hopefully. She'd purposely given Ruby hot dinners so she could sit with her two new friends who already had hot dinners every day.

'Oh yes. We had treacle sponge!' Ruby giggled, licking her lips and rubbing her tummy at the thought of it.

'And did you bring me any home?' Jess teased, knowing that without a doubt Ruby would have eaten the lot down without hardly a pause or a thought for her mum.

Ruby looked up at her mum as if she was stupid to even suggest such a thing. 'Of course not mum!'

'So what did you do after lunch?'

'We had music and met our new teacher. He's very nice, but very old! Well, Maisie and Florence say he's older than their daddy's so he must be old.' Ruby stated as if she was an expert in matters pertaining to all things old.

Jess looked at her feeling slightly puzzled. 'Maisie's mummy said he's just finished his training.'

Ruby nodded and handed her PE bag to Jess. 'Can you carry this for me? My arm's aching.' She then returned back to Jess's question. 'He has just finished his training, but he's still old! Older than you mummy.'

'Oh. So is he as nice as Mrs Brown?'

Ruby looked thoughtful for a moment. 'No. He's nice, but he's a bit strict. He told me off when I crashed the cymbals to see how loud they were.'

'Can't say I blame him, Rubes. You are a noisy so and so sometimes.' Jess laughed, thinking she didn't blame him. For someone so little, Ruby could be very noisy sometimes.

'I'm not that noisy!' Ruby stuck her bottom lip out and looked affronted at being told she was noisy.

'Well maybe next time you'd better show him how quiet you can be and maybe play a different instrument.'

Ruby looked cheered up at Jess's suggestion of another instrument. 'He plays the guitar y'know mum. I'd like to learn to play the guitar. If I got one for Christmas do you think he could show me?'

'Well you asked for a bike, and a drum-kit and a baby Annabel and a science kit.' Jess reeled off just a small excerpt of Ruby's extensive Christmas list, which she'd been writing and constantly adding to throughout the year and was steadily getting longer and longer.

'Ah but I want a guitar even more! Mr Orange said that they're so cool to play!' Ruby was by now nearly jumping up and down with excitement at the thought of a new guitar too.

'Did he now?' Jess muttered, thinking she'd like to have a little word in this Mr Orange's ear at putting the idea of yet another present onto Ruby's every-growing list. 

'Oh yes. You'll meet him very soon and then you can ask about teaching me the guitar.' Ruby suggested, as if it was a fore-gone conclusion that she was going to get the guitar for Christmas.

'We'll discuss it another time,' Jess suggested, thinking that by the time Christmas came around Ruby would have thought of another dozen more things she wanted and the guitar would be long forgotten.


	5. Chapter 5

As the Autumn term progressed, Ruby settled into school life as if she'd always been at Irk Valley. She talked more and more about her new teacher Mr Orange as he began to take on her class in a growing number of lessons readying Mrs Brown for retirement. It had been decided that this would be the best way so as not to unsettle the children. When Jess had received the letter advising her of the school's plan to ease the transition from one teacher to another she'd read it with a cursory glance, before dumping it straight into the recycling bin at the end of her galley kitchen.

Jason was enjoying taking on a more active role in the school and relished the fact that he the head-teacher had suggested he take on some after school musical clubs once he was fully immersed in his teaching role permananently. He was beginning to think about what lessons he would like to teach and guitar seemed to be the natural first choice for him to do.

As Christmas drew ever closer, Ruby became more and more excited. She'd been picked to play an angel in the school play and Jess had spent several hours in front of their log fire sewing a white angel outfit, complete with silver wings fashioned from duct tape and silver tinsel. Every day she asked how much longer she had to wait until she got to wear her outfit and every day Jess patiently told her how many days longer she would have to wait.

On the night of the play Jess had been asked to work until 6pm by her boss, so her mum Maggie had offered to look after Ruby and take her back to school to change into her Angel outfit which had been carefully hung on a named, padded hanger and left on her peg.

Jess left off dead on 6pm and hurried out to her car. It had been extremely cold all day and the car windscreen was beginning to ice up again already. Cursing under her breath, she started the car engine and began to swiftly spray the windscreen with de-icer. Ten minutes later the car was de-iced and she made her way out onto the busy main road which wended it's way towards Ruby's school. She cursed again as she saw that the traffic was bumper to bumper and there were blue lights flashing away in the distance - a sure indication that there was an accident.

Half an hour later she'd moved all of probably three hundred metres and she was beginning to panic as she realised if the traffic didn't move very soon that she was going to miss the start of the school play and that Ruby was sure to notice if she wasn't there.

Jess craned her neck around to see whether it would be worth somehow trying to reach the school from the opposite direction. It would be a much longer journey, but it might be worth the risk, she thought to herself. Unfortunately the traffic was just as bad going the other way so she decided to stay in the queue which had now started to move forward at a snails pace.

Eventually she reached the front of the queue and was directed around an ambulance and fire engine. The fire crew were attempting to cut someone from the wreckage and part of the delay was down to people rubber-necking to see what was happening. Thankfully five minutes later she was on her way to the school and drew up alongside the school just as the clock in her car hit 7 o'clock. Scanning the road up and down, she realised that there were no spaces anywhere. The car park for the staff had two empty spaces at the very front. Did she dare park there? Making a snap decision, she pulled into the car park and drew up alongside a silver Mini. She slammed the door and ran towards the front door, pointing her key fob over her shoulder at the car to set the alarm.

The music was just starting as Jess ran helter skelter into the school dining room where the play was taking place. Everyone was seated waiting for the show to start as Jess stood scanning the rows for an empty seat. She could see her mum seated towards the left, a couple of rows from the front and luckily she'd saved her daughter a seat. Hurrying down the gap in the middle of the two blocks of seats, Jess apologised profusely as everyone had to stand so she could make her way along the row until she reached her seat. She flashed her mum a grateful glance as she sat down in the seat with a resounding plop and sighed a huge sigh of relief that she'd made it by the skin of her teeth.

Halfway through the show Ruby fluttered onto the stage in her fairy outfit, her tongue clamped between her teeth as she concentrated on her twirling and waving her wand at the same time. Jess felt a wave of love and pride as she saw her young daughter pirouetting as if her life depended on it, all the while frantically scanning the audience to try and see her mum. Her face lit up in a huge grin as she spotted Jess and Maggie and she briefly forgot herself as she stopped and gave them a small wave, before remembering her job was to be a beautiful fairy.

Half an hour later the show was finished and Jess realised she was starving hungry. She'd last eaten at midday and it was gone 8pm. As she waited for Ruby to re-appear, the head-teacher presented Ruby's teacher Mrs Brown with a huge bouquet of flowers to celebrate her retiremement and Jess tried to ignore her growling stomach.

'Unfortunately Mrs Brown's replacement, Mr Orange, has been called away to a family emergency a few minutes ago. I'm hoping that you'll all make him feel welcome when he takes over full time in December,' the head teacher, Mr Reid said to the gathered parents.

'I saw him just before you got here.' Maggie whispered quietly into Jess's ear. 'If only I was a little younger. Have you met him?'

Jess shook her head slowly as she tried to recall whether she'd spotted him in the playground. 'No, I've heard plenty about him, but not met him yet. Ruby seems to like him though. She said he's a bit strict, but to be honest that's not a bad thing.'

'Well he could be as strict as he likes with me.' Maggie laughed dirtily as she recalled seeing Jason hurrying out of the hall, a grim expression on his face just before the show started.

As Jess and Maggie were discussing Jason, he was on his way to Gary's house. He'd felt his phone vibrate in his pocket three times in quick succession, before he'd surreptitiously slid it out of his pocket to see who it was that was obviously intent on reaching him. He noticed there were three missed calls from Gary's mobile, along with a message. The show was just about to start and he figured he'd got around five minutes before the music was going to begin. He murmered to Mrs Brown that he needed to make a very quick phone call and headed out into the foyer where parents were still filtering in through the double doors. His heart sunk as he listened to the garbled message which Gary had left. It was somewhat difficult to understand what Gary was saying as he sobbed into the phone mentioning Fran and Mae and needing to speak to Jason as soon as possible.


	6. Chapter 6

Jason tried repeatedly to ring Gary back, his heart in his mouth as he wondered what the problem was. Had he imagined that Gary was saying that Fran was gone and Mae was someone else's child? He tried to shake off the feeling of unease as he tried to work out in his mind what he should do. Part of him said that Gary was part of his old life and though they were still close and were in touch constantly, he had to put his new life first. And then conversely, his mind flipped back towards Gary and that he needed Jason and he needed him now by the sound of things.

His mind made up, he quickly texted Gary with the simple words. "I'm on my way to London now. J", before heading back into the hall and taking Mrs Brown to one side. ' Joyce, I have a family emergency. I really need to go to London tonight.'

Joyce raised her eyebrows in surprise, 'but I thought your family are all here in Manchester?'

'Um no, I do have some in London and it seems I'm needed urgently. I wouldn't normally ask, but I'm worried and it can't really wait.' Jason felt guilty for bending the truth, but as far as he was concerned Gary wasn't just a friend or ex work colleague, he was family.

Mrs Brown glanced sympathetically at Jason. It was quite obvious that he was extremely worried as he looked at her appealingly. 'Of course you must go, Jason. You've helped greatly with the performance itself and we're all extremely grateful. You be on your way and I'll let Mr Reid know. He'll be fine with it.'

Three hours later Jason was drawing up outside Gary's huge three storey townhouse in Chelsea. He parked up behind Gary's black Range Rover and switched the car engine off. Lights spilled out of the windows and out over the neat front garden, making the house look welcoming. Though for none of the curtains to be closed was strange in itself, considering it was a cold, December night. Jason slammed the car door and hurried up the front path. As he arrived at the shiny black painted door it was opened immediately, as if Gary had been waiting for him.

'Gaz, what's going on?' Jason asked, his face etched with concern as he stepped over the threshold and he caught a glimpse of Gary's white face. For someone who normally looked the picture of heath, Gary looked anything but at that very moment. He had red circles under his eyes where it looked like he'd been crying and his hair was sticking out at odd angles from his head, as if he'd been constantly running his hands distractedly through it.

'She's gone. Fran's gone Jay.' Gary said simply, scrubbing at his eyes with the backs of his hands to keep the tears at bay.

'And Mae? Where is she?' Jason looked around the black and white tiled hallway, almost expecting Mae to suddenly appear.

'She's gone too!' Gary's voice cracked painfully as he recalled what had happened earlier that day.

'Where are they Gaz?' Jason shivered slightly as he realised that not only had he forgotten to bring his coat, such was his hurry to get back to London. He'd also left without even packing a small overnight bag. He noted that the house felt freezing and assumed that Gary had forgotten to put the heating on.

'Fran's left me and taken Mae with her. They've gone to her mum's. She said she needs space and to think things through.'

Jason gently took Gary by the arm and led him into the kitchen. 'Come on, let me make you a cup of tea. Have you eaten at all today?'

Gary looked confused momentarily as he tried to remember when he'd last eaten. 'No, not since breakfast,' he sat down heavily onto one of the kitchen chairs and looked at Jason with utter despair and dejection on his face. 'Jay, what am I gonna do?'

Jason flicked the kettle on and shoved two pieces of bread into the toaster before turning around to face Gary, his hands resting behind his back as he leant on the worktop. 'Ok, start from the beginning,' he suggested, his voice soft as he looked directly at Gary.

'It was going so well....' Gary trailed off, as if he could hardly believe what was going on. 'Mae was sleeping through the night and we were beginning to talk about going out for our first night out since she was born. I let Fran have a lie in this morning and I gave Mae her breakfast. She was all smiles and laughs and I was just thinking how lucky we were.' 

Jason quickly poured their teas and placed the toast on a small plate, before sitting down opposite Gary and pushing the butter and jam towards him, which was still lying on the table from earlier that morning. 'So what happened next?' he asked, taking a sip from the scalding hot liquid and pushing the plate towards Gary to indicate that he should attempt to eat.

'Mae was insisting on trying to feed herself and she made a right pigs ear of it.' Gary smiled distantly, ignoring the plate of toast in front of him, as he thought back fondly to her obstinacy that she could do it all alone, as she'd grabbed the spoon from his outstretched hand. 'She was in such a mess by the end of it I decided to grab a clean set of clothes and run a bath so I could wash the weetabix out of her hair.'

Jason waited patiently for Gary to continue. Gary pushed the toast to one side as if he couldn't face eating anything. 'I picked Mae out of her highchair and we went upstairs quietly, so as not to wake Fran. Except she wasn't asleep when I got up the stairs. The door was ajar as I walked past to get to Mae's room and I heard her tell someone she loved them. She was talking in this flirty kind of manner - something I haven't heard since before Mae was born,' he spat out, his tone bitter at the thought of the conversation he'd overheard. 'I wanted to walk away, but I was curious as to who she was talking to, so I put my finger to my lips to tell Mae to keep quiet and I skulked behind the door eavesdropping. I know they say you never hear good about yourself when you do that, but I wanted to know who she was speaking to.'

'And who was she speaking to?' Jason set his mug down on the table and looked at Gary worriedly.

'Someone called Jack it turns out. She was saying she'd meet up with him when I was back in the studio the following day. It was obvious from the tone of her voice that they were more than friends.' Gary's head sank downwards towards where his hands lay flat on the table and he began to to openly sob.

'Are you sure you're not mistaken Gaz? Fran worships you.' Jason put out a hand and patted Gary supportively across the table, looking at Gary with barely disguised confusion - everyone knew Gary and Fran's relationship was rock solid.

'I'm sure Jay. I felt like I was rooted to the spot mate as she described in detail what she was going to do to this bloke when she saw him tomorrow. It was all I could do not to be sick. It was only having Mae in my arms that stopped me. I didn't even stop to think that she might understand some of it.'

'Gary, she's too young. What is she? One? No, don't worry about that. So did you confront her?'

'Yeah I did. God knows how, but I managed to bath Mae first and by the time I got downstairs she was waiting there. Bold as brass she was, getting her breakfast as if she hadn't been talking dirty to someone not ten minutes earlier!'

'Well I guess she didn't suspect that you'd overheard.' Jason said with a wry grin, a grin that died immediately as Gary looked at him with a pained expression.

'As soon as I walked in the room she knew by my face. I didn't know whether to cry with sadness or scream at her to ask why. Why would she do this to me when we have such a good life?'

'I can't answer that Gaz. Maybe she doesn't know the answer to that one herself,' he hesitated as he wondered whether to address the white elephant in the room - the fact that Gary had tearfully mentioned on the phone message that Mae wasn't his. 'Gaz, you said on the phone that Mae isn't yours. Did I imagine that?' he asked gently, trying not to hurt Gary any further.

Gary immediately burst into noisy tears and nodded. 'I just sat there for a few minutes and stared at her when I came down to the kitchen. I wanted to know what was going on, but didn't all at the same time.' He took a deep sigh and continued shakily. 'I asked her straight out who Jack was and she said that he was her childhood sweetheart without any hesitation. Turns out she met up with him at a school reunion she attended not long after Mae was born. By the end of the week she was fucking him in our house - in our bed! Bet he loved that - fucking my Missus! She said that she told him who I was. I guess even if she hadn't told him who I was he would have known who I was when he saw all the photos of us looking so happy.'

'So where was Mae when all this was going on?'

'Conveniently with Grandma. Fran said she was meeting up with an old schoolfriend and mum believed her - why wouldn't she?'

'So who's Mae's dad then?' Jason was feeling well and truly confused by now as to where the paternity of Mae fell into in all this.

'A one night stand. She went out with some work colleagues for her birthday and it happened then. She said seeing as it was out about Jack she might as well come clean about everything.' Gary said bitterly, his eyes glazed with yet more unshed tears. 'Can you believe that? She's the result of a one night stand - my baby.'

'Oh Gaz, that's shit!' Jason breathed, hardly able to believe in the depth of Fran's deception. 'Why would she have a one night stand with some random bloke? It just doesn't make sense!'

'Because she thought she could get away with it. Because she craved some excitement. I don't know.' Gary shrugged helplessly, tears flowing freely down his face.

Jason sat back in his chair, unable to formulate in his mind as to what to say to make Gary feel better about the situation. What the hell could he say? The poor bloke's entire life had come crashing down around his ears.

'I didn't suspect a thing! What kind of mug am I?'

'Are you sure Mae's not yours?' Jason asked, his eyes narrowed in suspicion as he wondered whether Fran could be wrong about Mae's parentage.

'Well now I think about it, the warning signs were there....' Gary said quietly. 'I mean think about it, she's got black hair and brown eyes. Fran's fair like me. I remember not long after Mae was born I mentioned how dark she was - not because I suspected she'd been unfaithful, ' he added as an after-thought. 'She actually had the gall to say she must have been a throw-back somewhere along the line and me like the silly bastard I am believed her!'

'Yeah, but why wouldn't you? The last thing you'd expect her of is cheating on you Gaz. Not if you thought you were happy.' Jason tried to re-assure Gary. 'So what are you going to do?'

'That's the thing. I don't know. How can I ever trust her again? Can I really accept it and bring Mae up as my own child?' Gary simply looked devastated as he asked Jason the questions which were bothering him.

'Only you know the answer to that one. Do you still love Fran? And more importantly. do you still love Mae in spite of who fathered her?' Jason asked sensibly, wondering how the hell Gary could even comprehend taking Fran back, but knowing it wasn't up to him to try to influence his friend.

Gary took a big swallow of his now tepid tea. 'Yes, I still love Mae. She may not be my blood, but I've brought her up and I want her in my life no matter what.'

'And Fran?'

Gary sat back in his chair and ran his fingers through his messy hair as he thought deeply. 'I don't think I can forgive her. To screw around behind my back with her childhood sweetheart is one thing, but to do it in my bed is unforgiveable. And to pass Mae off as mine - I can't forgive and forget that.' He looked at Jason, suddenly realising that Jason had dropped everything without question to be with him in his hour of need. 'Jay, how can I ever thank you for what you've done? I just panicked and wanted someone familiar to talk to.'

'What about Dougie and Mark?'

'I knew you'd have the answers.' Gary said simply, shrugging apologetically at Jason.

'Well I don't know about that.' Jason replied, feeling flattered that it was him that Gary had turned to. 'Come on, lets have a proper drink and maybe at the end I will have the answers,' he suggested, ushering Gary out of the chair and heading towards the drinks cabinet in the lounge which he knew Gary kept well-stocked with booze. 'Sometimes a drink is the only thing to do,' he said, opening the door and waiting for Gary to step forward and choose what he wanted.


	7. Chapter 7

The morning light pierced the curtains, waking Jason up from a restless slumber. 'Oh, fuck my head....' he groaned, lifting his head slightly from the pillow and wishing he hadn't bothered. His mouth felt like sandpaper and he realised that between him and Gary they'd sunk enough wine, followed by whisky to sink a battleship. He slowly swung his legs over the side of the bed and made for the bathroom to see whether he could find something resembling pain-killers.

An hour later he was attempting to force down some toast and marmalade and a cup of Earl Grey tea as Gary walked into the kitchen, his hands held up as he tried to shield his eyes from the spot-lights. 'Oh, fuck my head...' he trailed off, grimacing as he saw Jason sitting at the breakfast bar chewing methodically on the toast in a vain attempt to feel more human.

'They were my exact words an hour ago.' Jason replied, patting Gary supportively on the back as he walked past him and towards the kettle.

'You feeling better now?' Gary asked, wondering whether a cooked breakfast would kill or cure him if he attempted to eat one.

'Nah, not really. But it's staying down - at the moment,' he dusted the toast crumbs from his fingers and pushed the plate away, as he admitted defeat with the second slice. Swivelling around on the stool, he looked at Gary as he spooned coffee into a mug. 'How are you doing this morning?'

'As in, am I hung over or is my life still shit?' Gary retorted sarcastically, turning around and leaning on the worktop as he studied Jason. 'If that's the case, the answer is yes and yes.'

'Why don't you come back to Manchester with me?' Jason suggested, the words popping out of his mouth without thinking.

'Jay, I was more pissed than you last night. I don't think I should drive you back.' Gary sighed, missing Jason's point completely.

'I meant why don't you come up to Manchester to stay? I didn't mean for you to be my personal chauffeur, you dumb fuck!' Jason chuckled, wincing as the laugh clanked noisily round in his head and made his brain ache. 'You never know being away from here might be just the thing you need.'

'I hardly think becoming a sad recluse like you is going to make me feel less tempted to throw myself under the first tram I see.' Gary quipped, referring to the unusual public transport system in Manchester. He looked suitably chastened as he saw Jason's hurt expression at being referred to as a sad recluse. 'Errmm, sorry I shouldn't have said that....' he said, flushing apologetically at his friend.

'No you shouldn't, considering I dropped everything yesterday to be with you.' Jason snapped angrily. 'I left something important to be here for you and you show your gratitude by throwing insults at me.'

'Jay, I didn't mean it to come out like that.' Gary looked completely bereft as he wondered whether he'd gone too far. 'I really am sorry.'

Jason tapped his fingertips rhythmically on the work-top as he pondered whether Gary coming back to Manchester would help him work things through better. It sure as hell beat leaving him here in London to feel sorry for himself. 'Look, why don't you come back up north. You can stay with me if you prefer. I'm guessing your house sale up there is still going through?'

Gary nodded as he thought about his pride and enjoy in the Cheshire countryside, which Fran had persuaded him to put up for sale because she hated the stillness and solitude of the beautiful area, preferring instead the bright lights and noise of London. 'Yeah, we're supposed to be exchanging next week, so I'd best not stay there. The house has been stripped anyway,' he remarked, as he remembered Fran hurrying up there the minute it looked like the house was sold on the pre-text of wanting to be in charge of cleaning the house from top to bottom. Now it all made sense, she'd probably stripped it of everything she wanted for her new cosy life, binning the remainder or boxing it up.

'So what are you going to do about the house?' Jason looked at Gary thoughtfully. He knew that the Cheshire house was Gary's pride and joy and he'd only agreed to the house sale as Fran so obviously hated the country life.

Gary shrugged helplessly. 'I really don't know Jay. I only put it up for sale to please Fran. She hated it up there and it just stood empty for months at a time. It's probably not in the best state of repair.'

'Where do you want to live Gaz? I'm talking about what YOU want. Not Fran. She doesn't matter in any further decisions you make.'

'I might be too late though.' Gary's shoulders slumped despondently as he thought how stupid he'd been to allow Fran to dictate what he did with something which had mattered so much to him. After all, where had it got him? he asked himself. In a house which he didn't really like. Alone.

Jason got up, his face set decisively. 'Right, get on the phone to your lawyer and see if you can call it off. Once you've done that, get your case packed and we'll head back up there. If she really has stripped the house you can come and stay at mine until yours is back to normal.'

And if it is too late?' Gary's voice cracked, as he realised how stupid he'd been to trust Fran implicitly.

'We'll cross that bridge when we come to it. I would also mention your situation regarding Mae to your lawyer at the same time.' Jason suggested sensibly, thinking he might as well kill two birds with one stone.

'Jay, I don't think I have any rights. She's not my kid.' Gary's bottom lip trembled as he fought back tears at the thought of never seeing the child he loved beyond everything.

'Are you really going to give up on her that easily Gary? I thought you were more of a man than that! You bought her up thinking she was yours, that has to stand for something in this world. You might have to fight Fran to see her, but you can't just let her go!'

Gary looked hopefully at Jason. 'Do you really think it's worth trying to get access?'

Jason looked at Gary in disbelief. 'You need to ask me that? Of course you have to at least try. I'm going to have a shower and try to make myself feel more human and while I do that you get on that phone. Do you have a clean pair of pants and socks I can borrow?'

'Yeah, of course.' Gary replied and went upstairs to fetch him the clothes before doing as Jason had told him and ringing his lawyer.

An hour later they were on the motorway to Manchester, radio 1 blaring out the latest Sam Smith single. 'So, what did Martin have to say?' Jason asked, his glance sliding momentarily across to see what Gary's lawyer had said.

Gary heaved a sigh, 'he thinks we may be able to stop the house sale in the nick of time.'

'And Mae?' Jason asked, his eyes now back on the road as he concentrated on overtaking a large cement lorry.

'He's not so sure where Mae's concerned. He's suggested that I try contacting Fran to sort out something amicably and if that doesn't work then he'll see whether a letter from him will help. Of course she could say that I can have no further contact and that's it, but I guess I have to at least try.'

'Do you know where Fran is living? We haven't gone too far for me to turn back so you can try to speak to her in person.'

Gary shook his head decisively, his mouth turned down sadly. 'Jay, that wouldn't be a good idea. If I come face to face with that man she was carrying on with I might do something I'll regret and then where will I be?' he couldn't even bring himself to say Jack's name out loud. 'I'll ring her when we get to Manchester when I'm not so hung over.'

'What if she changes her mind once the dust settles? She may find that her new life with Jack isn't all she thought it would be and then what would you do?' Jason persisted with his train of thought, wondering whether Fran would live to regret her decision.

Gary ran his fingertips over his eyelids, wondering when his hangover was going to dissipate. It hardly helped him to think straight with a sore head banging away in the background. He sighed and looked at Jason, 'I don't know Jay. I still love her despite what she did to me and I hate the feeling of not knowing whether I'd take her back. I want to hate her, but I can't.' Tears prickled at his eyelids as he thought about how much he missed both her presence and Mae's around the house. At least with them living with him it made living in London bearable. Now that they were gone he hated the house with a vengeance and knew he couldn't ever live there again.

They continued their journey in companionable silence as Gary dozed on and off throughout the three hour road trip. Jason assumed he must be utterly exhaused from the last few days and kept quiet, allowing him to sleep and turning the radio down a notch so as not to disturb him.

As they pulled up outside Jason's riverside flat in the Spinningfields area of Manchester Gary rubbed his eyes and woke up. Yawning widely, he looked around momentarily confused as to where he was.

'Home.' Jason stated simply, looking across and grinning at his friend. 'Let's get you settled and then you can ring Fran to try and sort out this situation.'


	8. Chapter 8

By the following day Gary was feeling much more optimistic. Jason had returned back to work and Gary had spent that day attempting to sort out his muddled private life. He'd spoken to Fran at length on the phone and they'd managed to discuss Mae amicably. Gary had stressed to her that he wanted to still see as much as possible of the little girl who he'd always thought was his own daughter. Fran had surprisingly agreed to allow him access for one weekend a month, even though it wasn't as much as he would have liked, he knew that to push for more access when they'd only just managed an entire civil conversation might be a step too far. He figured that if he agreed to the once monthly access maybe once things were on an even keel he might be able to persuade Fran to agree to more frequent visits. It killed him having to speak to her, knowing that despite everything he still loved her and he hated himself for the feelings her voice stirred in him, but he knew that the part of his life with her and Mae in it was over - for good. He conceded that even though he still loved Fran he could never take her back after what she'd done.

He was just finishing a conversation on the phone with his estate agent when Jason walked in from work. 'Good day at work?' he asked, putting his mobile down and fixing Jason with a wry grin.

'Yeah, gotta find some time to plan in some parents evenings in a couple of weeks. I was supposed to have done it over the last couple of days, so the head wants it done tonight. The other teachers are waiting for me - y'know where they've got siblings of my pupils in their classes? It wouldn't do to have parents hanging around too long when they've got more than one teacher to see.' Jason delved into his bag and drew out a sheaf of papers containing lists of appointments the other teachers had made and that he now had to work around as he hadn't been in Manchester.

'So you'll need me to make myself scarce?' Gary asked, wondering whether he should just go and lay on his bed in the spare room and listen to some music on his i-pod.

'Nah, shouldn't take me long. I think there's only half a dozen parents with appointments already made with other teachers. I've just got to slot mine in around them and then it shouldn't take me long to do all the others. I've got a couple of evenings next week to play with.' Jason ran his hand through his hair and dumped the A4 sheets onto the wooden kitchen table.

'Hope you didn't mind but I made a start on dinner.' Gary remarked, nodding his head towards the square chopping board piled with an assortment of chopped red and green peppers. He sauntered over to the kettle and flicked the switch on ready to make them both a drink. 'Tea or coffee? he asked, turning around and looking at Jason for an answer.

'So this is what having a wife feels like. I quite like this having my dinner being made for me. Maybe I should make you stay.' Jason quipped and laughed teasingly at Gary, before replying that he'd like a mug of Lady Grey tea.

'Don't enjoy it too much. I like you, but not enough to do all the wifely duties such as shagging you.' Gary chuckled, shaking his head in horror at the thought of sleeping with his best friend. 'Anyway, I've been on the phone to the Estate agent and pulled the house sale, so I might not be around very long to be your housewife.'

'That was lucky,' Jason remarked, taking a grateful sip of the tea which Gary had just handed to him. 'I might have made you make a start on those wifely duties in the not too distant future.' He waggled his eyebrows teasingly at Gary over the top of his mug and grinned.

'Lucky, but I'll bet the buyers are pretty pissed off with me for changing my mind.' Gary looked guilty as he imagined the reaction of the couple who'd fell in love with his pride and joy, having the rug pulled out from under them.

'I'm sure, but I'm sure they'll soon find something else.' Jason said soothingly, sneaking a slice of red pepper and dodging away from Gary's hand as it reached out to slap him away.

'So, can I stay here until I've got the place ship-shape? I've arranged to pop over there tomorrow to see how much work needs doing before I move back in.'

'Stay as long as you like Gaz. Do you think there will be much needs doing?'

'I'm hoping not. I know I'll need to buy a load of new furniture, or move some up from London. I think the paintwork will be fine, but Fran completely cleared the place. Anyway enough about my house, you go do what you've got to do with your appointments and I'll set about fixing dinner.' Gary turned away and took a gulp of his tea as he turned the dial on the hob to light the flame. 'You've got around ten minutes and dinner will be ready.

'Yes darling.' Jason laughed loudly and disappeared into the lounge with his wad of papers.

Gary chuckled quietly to himself at being called darling, as he tipped the vegetables into the pan and they sizzled loudly as they hit the oil lying in the bottom of the pan.

Jason took a sip of his tea and spread the A4 sheets out on the coffee table in front of him. It only took a few moments for him to find the siblings of his own pupils and slot his times around them before he turned his attention to the remaining pupils in his class. He methodically worked his way through them all until he reached the last few. Ruby's mum had written a scribbled note asking if he could give her the latest slot possible due to her work, so after juggling a couple of pupils around he slotted her in last of all.

Sucking on the end of his biro, he spared a moment as he thought about Ruby and a smile played across his lips. She was a character and he had to admit he had a bit of a soft spot for her. Reflecting back to the first time he'd got to know her properly, he felt more than a little sorry for her. The subject of that class was family and they all had to draw a picture depicting their own family. Walking behind her, he could see her face screwed up in concentration as she drew an intricate picture of her and a lady with orange hair.

Ruby looked up at Jason as he leant over her and studied what she'd drawn. 'Mummy and me,' she said grinning down proudly at her artwork. She then proceeded to draw a man at the far end of the paper as far away from the picture she'd already done as humanly possible.

'And who's that?' Jason asked, his curiosity piqued as to why the man was so far away. 'Grandad?' he asked, wondering whether the person was far away because he was in heaven.

'Daddy.' Ruby sucked her bottom lip in and began to colour him in, before starting on another figure with long hair next to him. 'He doesn't love me or mummy now. He loves Cheryl!' she jabbed her index finger towards the lady she was beginning to now draw next to her dad.

'Oh, I'm sure he loves you too...' Jason trailed off, not quite sure what to say to make her believe her dad did still love her. He'd heard on the grapevine in the staff-room that Ruby's dad was down south, but had thought nothing of it, assuming that her dad worked away.

'He doesn't. He's going to be a daddy again with Cheryl and I've not been to see him since he rang me to tell me.' Ruby's voice took on the tone as if she really didn't care, but Jason could tell that she really did and couldn't believe her own father, estranged or not, couldn't even be bothered to tell her in person. At that moment he wished he could just give her a hug, but held back aware that teachers couldn't simply hug a kid anymore. It wasn't the done thing.

'Well it's very good Ruby. Very good. And I'm sure you'll see him very soon.' Jason said quietly, moving on to the look at the pupil who sat next to Ruby's work. He hadn't forgotten that conversation a few weeks earlier and wondered whether Ruby's daddy had at long last come to see her.


	9. Chapter 9

Gary was still living with Jason when the night of the parents evening came around. He was still waiting for some new furniture and the decorator was finishing up.

'What time are you expecting to be finished tonight? Shall I wait for you before eating?' Gary asked, shoving the last of his toast into his mouth and standing up to put his plate in the dish-washer.

Jason paused as he mentally went through his list of parents in his head. Ruby's mum was his last appointment at 7.00, so he guessed he'd be finished by 7.30pm. 'Um, if you don't mind waiting then I should be home by 7.45 at the latest.'

'Cool... I'll make us something quick for dinner,' Gary replied, trying to work out what to cook which would be easy too.

'Don't go to too much trouble, Gaz.' Jason picked up his holdall and rapidly scanned the contents to make sure he'd got everything he'd need. 'So what have you got planned today?' he asked as an after-thought.

'I'm going to take a drive over to the house to see how much longer it'll be until I can move back in. Hopefully by the end of the week everything will be ship-shape,' Gary sat back down at the kitchen table and took a sip of his coffee.

Jason checked his watch and realised he needed to get a move on, 'I'll see you later then.'

'Yeah, I hope it goes ok tonight.' Gary gave him a small wave and resumed reading the Daily Telegraph which was lying on the scrubbed wooden table.

Jason's day went without a hitch and at 5pm after a quick cup of tea with the other teachers and some marking of homework he was ready to meet the parents. He was feeling somewhat nervous considering this was the first time he'd conducted a parents' evening and didn't want any hiccups.

The first couple of meetings went well and he was running bang on time until he was faced with the mother of one of the most boisterous boys in his class. Opening the door he rapidly scanned the corridor, wondering if he'd have time for a quick trip to the loo before Lucas's parents arrived. He was disappointed to see the Lucas's mum perched inelegantly on the tiny chairs his pupils sat on every day, her skirt nearly hitched up to her waist it was so short.

'Um, Mrs Bell?' he asked, feeling slightly nervous as she looked at him like she wanted to eat him for dinner. He wondered why he felt nervous, considering he'd seen plenty of women looking at him like that in the past when he'd performed with the lads and hurriedly realised it was because there had been security there - this time he was all alone with someone who looked like she was far more interested in finding out the contents of his pants rather than the content of her son's work.

'Yes Jason....' she simpered, batting her heavily mascared eyelashes at him and shimmying her hips as she slid the skirt down over her ample hips to try and look slightly more respectable.

Jason stepped backwards and held the door open for Lucas's mum. She ducked under his arm as it held the door open and grinned flirtatiously up at him as she did so, her thick black eyelashes batting away again at him like a rabid hedgehog.

Sitting down opposite him, she afforded him another glimpse of thigh as she crossed her legs and smiled at him, her teeth chewing on her bottom lip as she attempted to clumsily flirt with him.

'Um, would you mind if I duck out to the loo, Mrs Bell?' Jason asked politely, playing for time.

'Oh, of course!! And it's Miss Bell, well you can call me Annie. Lucas doesn't have a dad. He's from a sperm donor.' Lucas's mum gave him a winning smile and her eyes drifted down to his crotch area so he was under no illusion that she was more than willing to help him with his ablutions, if he so wished.

Jason had to physically stop his chin from hitting the floor at the fact that number one she was sharing Lucas's parentage (or lack of) with his teacher after a mere two minutes and number two that she was giving him what she obviously thought was a flirtatious look and that he wouldn't be able to resist her.

'I'll only be a minute...' Jason murmered, backing rapidly away from his chair and hurrying as fast as he could out of the room. Opening the toilet door he shut it quickly behind him, slamming the lock across with a resounding bang. He stood with his back pressed against the door and chuckled under his breath in relief that he'd got away, shaking his head at how obvious Miss Bell, or Annie as she insisted he call her, was being.

Moments later he was heading back to the room, knowing he couldn't put off the inevitable - he had to deal with Lucas's mum and then get rid of her as soon as possible, preferably with his privates intact.

Throwing open the door he was confronted by the sight of Annie sniffing his jacket and cradling it against her skin. 'What the hell do you think you're doing?' he looked aghast, not knowing whether to laugh or cry at the thought that despite leaving the band there were still people who wanted to invade his privacy.

Annie abruptly dropped his jacket onto his chair, her face aflame at being caught red-handed and sat back down onto her own chair with a resounding thud. 'I was trying to see whether you're a medium or a large...' she trailed off, going even redder when she realised how wrong the statement sounded.

Jason ignored her question and sat back down opposite her, adjusting his jacket onto the back of his chair once more. 'So, Lucas. You're here to discuss how he's doing at school?'

Annie licked her lips and batted her eyelashes at him again. 'Yes, but we could always go down the pub afterwards and discuss him if you'd rather?'

'Err no, I don't think so,' he looked directly at her and shook his head. 'I'm your son's teacher and look, I don't mean to be rude, but quite frankly you're not my type and also it's not really the done thing - y'know, seeing a pupil's mum.'

Annie looked disappointed. 'You were always my favourite. I'm a real fan.'

'Hence why I don't date fans either.' Jason shrugged and gave her what he hoped was an apologetic smile. It was true, he didn't date fans and she certainly wasn't his type. The last thing he wanted was to date a parent either. 'Now, back to Lucas....'

Jess sat outside Ruby's classroom flicking through Ruby's school books. Her heart swelled with pride when she saw her neat hand-writing and what she assumed was Mr Orange's spidery hand-writing in the margin telling her how good her work was. She stopped abruptly as she reached a hand drawn picture entitled "my family" and she sighed sadly as she saw a depiction of her, Steve, Ruby and Steve's girlfriend, Cheryl, right at the edge of the page almost as an after-thought.

The door opened and a man's face appeared. 'Ruby's mum?' he asked, with a polite smile. Jess nodded and stood up, not realising she was still clutching Ruby's literacy book in her hand.

Jess sat down opposite Jason and laid Ruby's literacy book on her lap as she shrugged her thick winter coat off her shoulder, before making a start on unwinding her scarf from around her neck.

Jason sat back and waited politely for her to finish. The literacy book slid off Jess's lap and crashed onto the floor in front of him, so he ducked down to pick up the book at exactly the same time as Jess did the same.

'Owww...' Jess said loudly as their heads met in the middle and crashed together.

'Oh god I'm so sorry!' Jason uttered, leaping to his feet and moving towards her to check she was OK. 'Are you alright?' he asked crouching down in front of her as she clutched her head.

'You have a hard head.' Jess muttered from behind her hands which were cupped over her eyebrow.

Ordinarily Jason would have made a dirty joke about all the women saying that, but he knew that it wouldn't look to impressive cracking a line like that with a complete stranger - especially at parents evening. 'Do you want me to get you a cold compress?' he asked, laying a hand on her shoulder.

'No, I'll be fine.' Jess dropped her hands and gave him a little grin. 'I think I'll recover,' she joked and took Ruby's literacy book which Jason was holding out to her. It was then that she realised what her friend Meg had been talking about all those weeks ago. He had the most gorgeous azure blue eyes, framed by dark eye-lashes and for a bloke with dark hair he was lucky enough not to have bushy eyebrows, like some.

'So... Ruby?' Jason said, rubbing his sore temple and turning his attention to his last pupil on the list. He hadn't failed to notice her appraising glance, but got the feeling that she didn't know who he actually was, given her lack of recognition. It was more a look of a woman who found him attractive, he thought to himself.

Jess brought her thoughts back to her daughter and picked up Ruby's literacy book from her lap. Yes, she certainly seems happy here.'

'She's a lovely kid, Mrs Shaw.' He slipped his black rimmed glasses on and scrutinised his carefully written notes about all his pupils, 'she's ahead on literacy, but struggles a little with maths. She'll get there I'm sure with practice of her times tables.' He ran his hand through his hair before turning back to look at her with a small smile, 'she's very good at art and I've noticed she loves music.'

'Yeah, she is desperate to learn the guitar. Her dad bought her one for Christmas and I need to look into maybe sorting her out with some lessons.' Jess agreed, feeling proud that despite the fact that Ruby was desperate to learn she knew she had to wait until Jess could afford it.

'I teach lessons after school. Well, I will be next month. There will be a nominal charge to the school, but it's not expensive. Do you think she'd like to come after school?' said Jason, pushing his glasses up his nose and looking at her in his disarming way.

'She'd love that.' Jess replied, her mind working over-time as to how she was going to juggle work and getting Ruby to the lessons.

'I think she'd get a great deal out of learning it. What do you think?' Jason sat back in his chair and studied Jess, thinking how pretty she was in a petite pre-raphaelite type way. She had the most beautiful shiny red hair, which was tied up in a neat bun with a dusting of freckles over her cheeks and full lips. Her green eyes were striking and for a moment he sat looking at her as if entranced. She certainly wasn't his type - for one, she was a mum and for two, she wasn't classically pretty. She wasn't his usual type, but it had been so long since he'd dated a woman he had all but forgotten what his type was.

'Yes. I just need to sort out how I'm going to fit it around my work.' Jess sighed, rummaging around in her handbag to retrieve her diary.

'Well I can stay behind afterwards until you can can come and get her.' Jason flushed as the words popped out without thinking about them.

Jess giggled lightly, ' does that come at an extra charge too?'

'No, consider it a favour. How long would it be for? Half an hour? I can always keep busy doing some marking or maybe do some drawing with her.' Jason turned his mega-watt dazzling smile on her, thinking she probably now thought he was some kind of weirdo. 'Of course if you'd rather not that's fine.'

Jess felt her stomach make an involuntary lurching movement as he continued to smile at her in his disarming way. 'I'll speak to my mum. I'm sure we can sort something out which would mean you wouldn't need to stay behind.'

Jason nodded, removing his glasses now that he'd finished for the evening and relaxed further back in his chair, crossing his legs so his ankle rested on his knee. 'Well, the offer's there. I understand things aren't so easy for you since you moved here.'

Jess stared at him in shock, wondering what the hell Ruby had been telling him. 'So I'm the talk of the staff room then?'

'No, I haven't said a thing. Ruby told me everything when I admired her drawing,' he explained hurriedly. 'She's a lovely little girl and I guess she wanted to share what was going on with someone who doesn't have any pre-conceptions.'

Jess felt tears spring to her eyes at the thought of her daughter feeling the need to talk to someone and wondered why her daughter hadn't told her how she was feeling. 'Thank you,' she said in a hoarse voice as she stood up and picked up her hand-bag.

Jason stood up and held out his hand to shake hers, 'let me know if you I can be of any help and it was lovely to meet you Mrs Shaw.'

Jess shook his hand and looked up at him shyly. 'Thank you Mr Orange.'

'It's nothing,' he replied, watching her as she walked towards the classroom door. 'I'll be in touch once the lessons are finalised and I'll see you soon.'

Jess swung around to look at him, thinking it was a long time since she'd met a man she actually fancied and it was wrong because he was her daughter's teacher and unless she was mistaken he quite liked her too. 'That would be lovely. Thanks.'

'Anytime. And if you have any concerns regarding Ruby - you know where I am.' Jason flashed yet another smile and sat back down at his desk as Jess closed the door behind her with a soft click.


	10. Chapter 10

Jess received the letter regarding the guitar lessons on her email the following week. It turned out it was on a Monday afternoon - the day when she finished work a little earlier. It meant that Ruby could stay after school and Jess would be able to pick her up without relying on her mum. She was aware that her mum had stepped into the breach a heck of a lot and it was nice to actually give her mum an extra hour every week to herself rather than having Ruby until Jess got home.

She looked over to where Ruby was sitting in front of the hearth colouring in a picture of a mermaid which she'd printed off Google Images. Ruby was concentrating intently on getting the felt tips in the lines, her tongue clamped in between her lips as she did so.

'Rubes, do you still want to do guitar lessons?'

Ruby nodded enthusiastically and fixed Jess with a big grin. 'Yes please. Will it be Mr Orange teaching me?' she hoped so, because she really liked her teacher. He was a bit of a hero in her eyes and was kinder to her than daddy was these days. Daddy always seemed tired and short-tempered whenever he saw her and this weekend he'd cancelled for the first time ever. 

Jess printed the letter and signed it and went off in search of her cheque-book to write a cheque to cover the cost of the lessons. As Jess left the room Ruby watched her go and wished yet again that daddy hadn't left mummy for Cheryl. She loved living up in Manchester because she got to see her grandma, Aunty Danni and cousins, but even though daddy was bad-tempered she still missed him.

Back at Jason's house, he was enjoying a final dinner with Gary. Gary's house was ready for him to move back into and the decorator had left the house earlier that afternoon. 'So, did you send that stuff down to Fran that you found?'

Gary took a fortifying sip of his red wine, his eyes clouding over at the mention of Fran's name. It was getting easier, but the mention of her name still sent his heart plummeting into his boots. He told himself over and over that she was a bitch, but it didn't stop his dreams being haunted by her and he awoke feeling bereft as both she and the dream disappeared into nothingness. 'I kept the photo I found lurking under the bed of Mae. I can't bear to part with it, but I boxed up the bag of baby clothes I found at the back of Mae's wardrobe. I thought Fran might want them as a keepsake.'

'You're being a lot more grown up about it than I ever would be.' Jason remarked, in between mouthfuls of the Fillet steak which they'd prepared together. 'She'd fucking pay for screwing around behind my back, if it was me. I wouldn't be as diplomatic as you're being.'

Gary shrugged sadly and pushed his dinner around his plate, his appetite rapidly disappearing at Jason bringing the subject of Fran up. 'I don't really have a choice if I want to see Mae again. If I piss her off I have no rights and she can stop her visits to me - just like that,' he clicked his fingers together to emphasise his point.

'I guess...' Jason trailed off, hating the fact that Fran could treat Mae like a pawn in their relationship to get Gary to dance to her tune whenever she chose to. 'She's a bitch and you deserve so much better.'

'Don't you think I haven't worked that one out for myself?' bitterness seeped into Gary's voice at the thought of Fran using Mae as a weapon. 'I love Mae with all my heart, but I wish she was mine. She feels in my heart like she's mine, but Fran loves reminding me whenever she gets the opportunity that I'm merely the person who brought Mae up. She fucking used me!'

'Is Mae coming up to see you this weekend?' Jason asked, hoping that she was because Gary seemed pretty despondent and he guessed it was the thought of moving back to the huge house alone.

Gary nodded and gave Jason a wry grin over the top of his wine glass. 'Yeah, I'm driving down to Birmingham and she's meeting me at the services on the toll road. It's halfway for both of us, so I guess I should be grateful that she's prepared to meet me.'

'So what have you got planned once she's here?'

'I was thinking of taking her to Heaton Park. Fancy joining me or do you have other plans?' Gary asked, referring to what was generally referred to as the biggest and best park in area.

Jason thought for a moment about what else he had planned. A weekend of marking school books, supermarket shopping and an opticians visit were some of the highlights - his life wasn't exactly starry any more and that was how he liked it. Except the thought of a day out with Gary and Mae sounded extremely tempting.

'Are you sure you want me around? You don't exactly see much of Mae as it is, without me being there like a hanger-on.'

'Jay, she loves you nearly as much as she loves me.' Gary grinned, referring to the close friendship which the two of them enjoyed.'

'That's cos I don't behave very grown up when she's around.' Jason admitted, feeling somewhat flattered at Gary's words.

'Yeah, you can tell you don't have kids!' Gary chortled, feeling instantly guilty when he saw Jason's face change rapidly to one of sadness that he'd never found anyone he'd liked enough to settle down with. 

Jason attempted to paint a smile on his face to make it look like he didn't mind. He'd never really spoken aloud about the fact he'd have loved nothing more than to have a kid of his own. He had to make do with his brother Jacob and younger sister Jackie's kids. Jacob had three kids - Olivia aged ten, Jake aged 8 and Nathan aged 4 and Jackie had a two year old called Tilly. His other brother Tom had no kids. Since he'd decided to teach he often wondered whether the reason he found pride seeing his nieces and nephews flourish under his guidance was because it was the nearest he'd ever get to having kids of his own. 'When were you thinking of going?' he asked, his mind made up that a day out with Gary and Mae would be a lot more pleasant than getting his eyes tested - he could do that another time.

'Um Saturday. I'm meeting Fran Friday evening and then I'll bring Mae back here. She'll be tired after the long drive, so I guess we'll head out late morning once she's had a decent night's sleep. You want to join us? I was thinking maybe a picnic would be nice.'

'Yeah, that would be nice. How about I sort the picnic out as thanks for the invite? You text me when you're leaving and I'll meet you in the car park. In fact, I'll see whether Jackie fancies a day alone with my brother in law and offer to take Tilly out for the day.'

Gary rubbed his hands together happily. 'Sounds like a plan.'

On the Saturday morning Jason set out to meet Gary and Mae. He'd rung Jackie and offered to take Tilly off her hands, so she could have some time with his brother in law Edward. He knew they didn't get much time to themselves and thought it would be an ideal opportunity for them to do just that. He picked Tilly up first, marvelling at the amount of paraphernalia a toddler brought with them on a day out. She'd written a list so he knew what she liked to eat and drink and also an idea of her routine.

'I'll bring her back in the morning,' Jason promised, slinging Tilly's overnight bag over his shoulder and fixing Jackie with a re-assuring smile.

'Honestly, we don't have to go out tonight Jay. You can just bring her home at tea time if she's grizzly. Me and Ed can go out another time.'

'I'm sure we'll be fine Jackie. We've got a busy day planned, so I'm sure she'll be so tired tonight she'll just go straight to sleep.' Jason was positive that it couldn't be that difficult - after all, he was a teacher. How hard could it be?

He arrived at the car park at 11.30 to find Gary had arrived a few minutes earlier. Parking up alongside Gary's black range rover, he killed the engine and walked around to the other side to take Tilly out of her car seat. After a few minutes tugging, he eventually worked out how to get her out of the contraption, thinking whoever designed the seat needed shooting.

Gary wandered over to the side of the car, Mae already clipped into her pushchair and kicking her chubby little legs out in excitement as to what the day was going to bring. Gary had already told her they were meeting Uncle Jason and he was bringing a playmate for her. 'Do you need a hand with putting her pushchair up?' he teased, taking Tilly from Jason as he now wrestled with the pushchair.

'Fucking, fucking things. You need a bloody degree to work out how all these fucking contraptions work!' Jason grunted, his foot firmly wedged on the metal bar between the wheels as he tried to force it open.

Gary burst out laughing as Tilly began to copy Jason and yelled "fucking, fucking things!' at the the top of her lungs. 'You'd better hope she rapidly forgets that word before the end of the day or your sister isn't going to be too happy at the type of educational words you've taught your young niece.' Gary laughed, taking the push-chair off Jason and putting it up with the ease of someone who had plenty of practice opening and closing baby equipment.

Jason groaned in annoyance as he heard Tilly repeat the swear word a third time for good measure. 'Oh shit, Jackie's going to kill me,' he said, groaning again as he heard Tilly say the word shit as he placed her gently into the seat of the pushchair. Tilly immediately arched her back in protest at having to sit still. 'Shhh Tilly, once we get in the park you can run around, but not here, not with all these cars around.' Jason put a woolly hat on Tilly's head to keep her warm, before doing the same and putting one on his own head.

After paying for the car park they set off into the park, making their way towards the Animal farm. Both girls squealed in delight as they glimpsed the Alpaca which was a well known animal in the park. After a little persuasion Gary managed to persuade Jason that Tilly would be OK to be let out of her pushchair as long as he held tightly onto her chubby little hand. They made their way slowly around the park, their progress hindered because of Tilly's little legs, but Jason knew there was no way he was going to coax her back into the pushchair now that she'd been let out.

Back at her house in Manchester, Jess glanced upstairs to see if Ruby has emerged. Ruby seemed to be taking an age to get dressed and she wanted to be on their way. She was aware that during the winter that the sun would set earlier. 'Come on Rubes! If you're not down soon we might as well not bother going to Heaton Park!' she called, her voice laced with exasperation.

'I'm just getting Daisy!' Ruby called down the stairs as she hunted under the bed for her precious doll, her fingers eventually finding her doll languishing by the wall, where she'd slid between the bed and floor in the middle of the night. 'Coming mummy!' she called, her voice wavering down the stairs to where Jess stood impatiently, already clad in her thick winter coat and gloves.

They arrived at the park around half an hour after Jason and Gary and headed in the same direction around the animal park. 

As they reached the end of the animals Gary looked at Jason and grinned. He was trying unsuccesfully to persuade Tilly back into the pushchair, but to no avail. She was shaking her head vigorously and stamping her foot in annoyance. 'Welcome to the world of little girls.' Gary chuckled, hoping to God that Mae would be a little easier when she reached Tilly's age. He craned his neck to look at the back of the pushchair. 'Where did you put the picnic, Jay?'

'Oh bugger!' Jason swore, instantly regretting it as he heard Tilly repeat "bugger" at the top of her little voice and giggling as she realised that she'd learnt another new word from Uncle Jason. This day was turning out better and better. 'Tilly, that's a bad word. You must not let your mummy hear you say that.' Jason wagged his finger at her in mock annoyance. He couldn't stay angry at her very long, he realised. 'Um Gaz, I was so worried about remembering Tilly's stuff I forgot the food. You look after Tilly and I'll go back and get it.' Jason offered, not looking forward to the long trek back as his stomach rumbled in hungry protest.

'Nah, it'll keep cold in the car.' Gary said, rubbing his hands together as he realised the temperature had dropped drastically since they'd come out. 'Look, why don't we go and have a bite to eat in the tea shop? We can have a carpet picnic back home later. The girls will love that,' he nodded in the direction of the tea shop.

Jason nodded in agreement, relieved that he didn't have to go all the way back to the car and followed Gary towards the tea shop. Opening the door, they were hit with a wave if warm air as they entered and Jason's glasses immediately steamed up. Letting go of Tilly's hand, he yanked them off and reached under his jacket so he could rapidly polish them on the edge of his woollen jumper. 

Tilly let out a yell of excitement as she glimpsed the toy corner on the opposite side of the room and charged over there like a woman on a mission. 'Tilly! Come back here!' Jason called, moving to follow her as she weaved through the full restaurant.

'Jay, leave her. She's safe there and you can see where she is,' Gary suggested, taking Mae from her pushchair and balancing her on his hip as they joined the back of the queue.

Jason did as he was told and looked up at the menu on the blackboard, glancing every now and then in Tilly's direction to check she was behaving. 'What do you reckon I should get Tilly?' he asked Gary, assuming he'd know what to get a two year old child.

Gary shrugged his shoulders. 'Um, jacket potato. Chips. Pizza...' you're asking the wrong person Jay. Mae's still on the home-made stuff,' he reached inside Mae's bag and extracted a pot of Sweet potato and lamb stew which Fran had sent in Mae's bag to be warmed up.

Jason eventually decided on a jacket potato with cheese for Tilly and the same for himself, as well as a pot of tea and went to sit down and wait for Gary to place his order and get Mae's food warmed up.

Jess and Ruby had finished looking at the animals and it was beginning to feel very chilly. 'Shall we go get some lunch?' Jess suggested, holding out her hand to Ruby.

'Yes please, Ruby agreed, looking up at Jess. 'Can I have a hot dog and chips?'

'If they have them.'

They were immersed in their conversation as Jess pushed open the door of the tea shop, a wave of warm air washing over them as they entered the room. 'Mr Orange!' Ruby shrieked at the top of her voice as she glimpsed her teacher in the toy corner picking up a little girl. She let go of Jess's hand and headed over to say hello to him, a big smile plastered across her face.

Jason stood up, balancing Tilly on his hip as he heard someone calling out his name. 'Oh hello, Ruby!' he said, ruffling her hair as she reached him and started bouncing about in excitement.

He looked at Jess and smiled, thinking how pretty she looked with her red, wind-blown cheeks. 'Hello,' he said politely, not sure whether to call her Jess or by her full name.

'Hello,' Jess said quietly, a thread of disappointment running through her. He had a child with him, she realised. A child meant he was almost certainly married or in a relationship. She knew it was stupid, but it didn't stop her feeling disappointed. She could see he wasn't wearing a wedding ring, but lots of men who were married didn't wear one. They stood for a moment and looked wordlessly at each other, unsure what to say. 

'Nice to see you, Ruby.' Jason said as Jess began to back away. 'And you Jess,' he added as an after-thought.'

'And you.' Jess replied, turning away before he saw the disappointment in her face that he had a kid and most probably a wife.


	11. Chapter 11

Jess made her way over to the serving counter, trying to squash down the slight feeling of disappointment running through her about seeing Jason with the little girl. She ordered herself a bowl of warming Broccoli and Stilton soup and a Hot Dog for Ruby. Weaving her way back through the crowded coffee shop, she eventually found a spare table and flopped down, unwinding the fluffy scarf from around her neck as she did so.

Ruby attacked her Hot Dog with gusto, streaks of tomato sauce squelching out of the bun and spreading around her mouth. Jess resisted the temptation to lean forward and wipe Ruby's mouth, deciding she might as well wait until she'd finished.

'Do we have to go home after lunch?' Ruby asked, her mouth full of sausage as she asked the question. She loved being out of the confines of their small terraced house and despite the cold, she was enjoying their time together. Since her dad had moved in with Cheryl and announced she was going to have a half-brother or sister her and Jess had become a tight little unit and she wasn't sure that she ever wanted mummy to find a boyfriend, such was their closeness.

'Not if you don't want to,' Jess replied with a twinkle in her eye, knowing that Ruby was possibly angling for a trip to the cinema. 'What do you fancy doing?'

Ruby shrugged, took another bite of her Hot Dog bun and looked thoughtful as she chewed. 'We could go and visit Aunty Danni,' she replied, thinking it might be nice to catch up with her cousins.

'She's away for the weekend,' Jess replied, hoping that Danni was behaving herself down in London where she was at a mutual friend's Hen Weekend.

Ruby paused, her forehead furrowed as she thought about what else they could do. They'd pretty much exhausted what there was to see at the park. 'Is there anything on at the cinema?' she asked finally, not even sure if she really wanted to go to the cinema.

'I don't know. Let me check on my phone,' Jess remarked, hoping the WI-FI was decent in there as she put her spoon down and bent down to rummage in her handbag for her phone. As she found her phone she straightened back up and caught a glimpse of Jason over the other side of the room looking straight at her, studying her with a thoughtful expression on his face. She felt her skin redden at his unwavering gaze and tore her eyes from his, as she attempted to focus on the screen of her phone. Why was he staring at her? She wondered to herself. It was un-nerving catching him staring at her like that, almost like he was mentally undressing her.

'So, what's on mum?' Ruby asked, wondering why her mum was acting so strange all of a sudden.

'Um, um....' Jess blustered, attempting to ignore the feeling of his eyes on her back as her fingers moved swiftly over the screen on her phone as she tried unsuccesfully to type her 4 digit password in and gain access to her phone. 'Give me a minute. The WI-FI's not great.' She lied, as she tried to cover up how flustered his gaze was making her feel.

Across the room Jason had seen the pink flush creep up Jess's neck as their eyes met. There was something captivating about her, he thought to himself. He'd never, ever been attracted to a red-head in all the years he'd been dating. He'd also never been attracted to someone with a kid before either, favouring brunettes who were far younger than him. He liked women who were model thin, without an ounce of fat on them, knowing that it attracted envious glances at the functions he used to attend with the band. Most of the time they weren't exactly scintillating conversation, but it didn't matter. If they were good in bed, conversation wasn't important. He had a feeling that Jess was the complete antithesis of everything he'd wanted in the past and it did confuse him a little. He continued to stare at her as he tried to work out what it was exactly about her that he was attracted to.

Jess eventually managed to type in her password correctly and pressed the icon for the internet. As she waited for the page to load she surreptitiously looked over once more in Jason's direction and saw he was still looking at her. He smiled at her apologetically, as he realised she'd caught him overtly staring at her like some kind of weirdo and was rewarded with a small smile back, before she dipped her head back down towards her phone and the flush continued to spread up over her high cheekbones, dusted with freckles.

'Mummy, Mr Orange is staring at you. Do you think he likes you?' Ruby asked innocently, finishing the last of her Hot Dog and fixing Jess with a knowing look. 'I think he wants to be your friend.'

'Really?' the flush crept ever higher as Jess wondered idly what being kissed by him felt like. 'Well, I'm sure he's a very nice friend to have,' she murmered, thinking Mr Orange's wife certainly wouldn't want him being friends with a woman, as Ruby had suggested.

'Yes, he keeps looking over here. Why don't we go and see if he wants to come to the cinema with us?' Ruby asked, completely oblivious to how flustered her mum now looked at her suggestion.

'Oh, I'm sure he has to be home soon. I should think his wife will be expecting him home,' Jess murmered, her fingers scrolling over the list of films which were showing at the local Vue Cinema. 'Besides, his little girl is a little bit too young to appreciate a film.'

Ruby's mouth turned downwards as she realised her mum had a point. She picked her hot dog back up and continued to eat it. Jess put her phone down on the table and resumed eating her soup.

Once they'd finished eating, Jess consulted her watch and saw that it was 2.30. There was around an hours' sunlight left, she thought to herself as she picked up her scarf and began to wind it back around her neck. 'Are you ready, Ruby?' she asked, waiting patiently as Ruby nodded and scraped her chair back and stood up.

As they passed Jason and Gary's table, Jason and Jess's eyes met and he nodded at her and smiled politely again, as his eyes twinkled softly at her. Jess smiled back in response and tried to stifle down the butterflies which flitted through her stomach.

Once they got outside, Ruby let out a squeal as she saw it had been snowing whilst they ate their lunch and everywhere was covered with thin blanket of dazzling white snow. 'We could make a snowman! Can we do that rather than going to the cinema?' she asked, her mind made up.

Before Jess could answer, there was a waft of warm air from the cafe as the door opened and Jason, Gary and the kids emerged from the cafe. 'Hello again,' Jason remarked, as he caught sight of Jess and Ruby standing outside in the snow.

'Look! It's snowing Mr Orange!' Ruby squeaked excitedly, clapping her hands together.

'So it is,' Jason remarked, squatting down so he was level with Tilly in her pushchair so he could make sure her jacket was securely fastened as the snow was still steadily falling. 'Would you like to make a snowman?' he asked her, smiling gently at her and tucking the ends of her fluffy pink scarf into her padded winter coat. Tilly nodded enthusiastically and kicked her plump legs in excitement. 'Well, they'll be closing up here soon, so how about we go home and you we can make one in the garden?' He turned and looked at Jess and gave her a warm smile, 'would you and Ruby like to come and help out?'

Ruby looked up at Jess and gave her a beseeching glance, 'mummy, can we?' she asked, her tone hopeful as she waited for Jess to make a decision.

Jess looked uncertain, unsure as to whether she should take Jason up on his offer. 'Well ummm..I don't know...' she murmered, trying to ignore Ruby pulling on her arm as she tried to persuade her mum to say yes.

'We're going to have a carpet picnic too!' Gary said, as a way to persuade Jess. He could see that Jason was taken with her and wanted to help his friend in any way he could.

'Oh mummy! Come on!' Ruby tugged Jess's hand again, to emphasise that she really wanted to go.

'Ok. Ok!' Jess laughed, thinking maybe she was being a spoilsport, considering Ruby so obviously wanted to go and build a snowman. She sincerely hoped that Jason's wife wouldn't mind him turning up home with her and Ruby in tow and that she wasn't the jealous type.

They began to walk back to the car park as the snow started to fall heavily once again. Ruby released her grip from Jess's hand and skipped ahead to where Jason was pushing Tilly in her pushchair. She began to chatter away to him, only stopping when they arrived back at their respective cars.

'I'll lead and you and Ruby can follow, if that's ok?' Jason suggested, unclipping Tilly from her pushchair and busying himself with securing her into her car seat.

'OK.' Jess agreed, feeling a little bit nervous about going back to a house which basically belonged to Ruby's teacher. She wondered whether his head teacher would be too impressed if it got out that he'd been socialising with a parent.

Gary pulled out of the car park first, followed by Jason in his vintage gold car and Jess fell into line behind them. The journey was slow going due to the heavy snowfall, but half an hour later they drew up outside the building which contained Jason's flat. 'Whoa! How much does a teacher earn?' Jess whistled through her teeth, as she gazed upwards at the building. It was impressive looking from the outside and she wondered which one was Jason's flat. Switching off the engine, she stole a look over her shoulder at Ruby and noticed that Ruby's mouth had dropped open at the glass building stretching up into the dark sky.

Once Jason got Tilly out of the car, he walked over to Jess's car and tapped on the window. Jess opened the car door, a shower of snowflakes billowing into the car as she did so. 'Do you want to get Ruby out of the car and follow us up?' he asked, nodding in Ruby's direction as she sat in the back of the car.

Jess nodded and unclipped her seat-belt and the group made their way into the palatial marble entrance hall of the flats. Jason pressed the button to call the lift and they all waited in companionable silence, the only sound being the old fashioned clock on the wall. Jess felt her heartbeat rise a notch as the bell sounded to indicate that the lift had arrived and she wondered once more what Jason's wife would say about him returning home unannounced with another woman in tow, as well as a child who was actually one of his pupils.

'Are you sure it's ok for me to join you like this?' Jess asked, stepping backwards slightly as if she wanted to leave.

'Of course. I wouldn't have suggested you came if it wasn't ok.' Jason replied, completely oblivious to Jess's obvious discomfort as he walked into the lift and punched the button to hold the doors so they could all get in together. The lift slid smoothly upwards to the very top floor and Jess's eyebrows raised slightly in surprise that he obviously lived in the penthouse suite, as they all emerged from the confines of the lift and she spied just the one mahogany front door. She could only assume that Mrs Orange had a high flying city job or similar, she mused to herself.

Jason retrieved his door keys from deep inside his thick winter jacket and opened the door for them all to enter whilst he wrestled with the clips fastening Tilly into her pushchair.

'Do you need a hand?' Jess asked, bending down in case he needed her help.

'Um no, got it,' Jason grinned triumphantly as he managed to unclip the straps and eased Tilly out of the pushchair. Tilly immediately ran into the flat, leaving Jess and Jason looking at each other and smiling shyly. ' Shall we go in?' he gestured towards the open door and gave her another shy smile. 'We can have a warm drink and then maybe go and make snowmen in the communal garden downstairs. We were then going to have a carpet picnic if you want to stay?' he asked her, as he followed her into the huge apartment.

Jess was so agog at the enormous hallway which opened out into an open-plan lounge and kitchen area, she didn't even hear what he was saying. She stopped and simply spun around in complete silence, completely oblivious to everyone else in the apartment. 'Wow!' she breathed under her breath, as she caught sight of a large collection of mounted gold and platinum coloured vinyl discs on the wall. 'Are these yours or your wife's?'

Gary ambled over from the kitchen area and chuckled as he heard Jess's question. 'What wife? Jay doesn't have a wife!'

'But?' Jess looked at Jason in confusion and pointed in Tilly's direction, 'isn't she your daughter?'

'God, no!' she's my sister's daughter. I get to give her back soon,' Jason laughed out loud and scooped Tilly up in his arms to plant a big kiss on her head. 'I'm Uncle Jason, aren't I Tilly?' Tilly squealed loudly in response and burst into peals of laughter as Jason began to tickle her.

'So who do all these gold discs belong to?' Jess asked, still feeling confused. 'You're a teacher. Did you get these off EBAY?'

Jason burst into yet more laughter and looked sheepishly at her. 'You don't know who I am, do you?'

Jess shook her head and wandered over to inspect the discs, comprehension dawning as she read the titles on the middle of each disc and the same name underneath every title. Each one bore the name "Take That".

'Are you one of them in Take That?' she spun around and fixed Jason with an accusing stare. 'You're famous and you didn't think to tell me? I feel such a fool!'


	12. Chapter 12

There was a moment's uncomfortable silence as Gary looked between Jason and Jess, wondering how Jason was going to talk his way out of this little contretemps. 'Come on Ruby, let's go fix us all up with a drink,' Gary suggested, holding out his hand for the little girl to take hold of. 

Ruby did as she was told and placed her small hand into Gary's and followed him towards the kitchen. 'Do you think Mr Orange has hot chocolate? I really, really like hot chocolate - especially with marshmallows.'

'Oh I'm sure Mr Orange has some somewhere. We might have to have a poke around in his cupboards. Though we have to put everything back because he gets grumpy when people mess around with his stuff and don't put it back exactly as they found it,' Gary said, glancing in Jason's direction and realising that Jason had other things on his mind.

Jason waited until Gary had disappeared in the direction of the kitchen with Ruby, before turning back to address Jess's question. She stood looking angrily at him, her hands firmly planted on her hips as she waited for his answer. 'Um... there's not been a time to tell you. Every time I've seen you it's been in a teaching capacity and it didn't seem right.'

'But you could have prepared me, Mr Orange. I feel really stupid that I didn't realise.' It all made sense now why the other mums mooned around over him. She'd genuinely thought it was because he was good looking. Now it seemed it was simply because he was famous - or had been not so long ago by the looks of things.

'Jason. Call me Jason.' 

'It's too weird. You're Ruby's teacher. You're not Jason. You're Mr Orange.' Jess still stood looking at him angrily, though Jason had to admit she looked like she might be thawing just a little bit - unlike the snow which was still falling thick and fast past his windows.

'For tonight. Just pretend I'm not Ruby's teacher?'

Jess stood for a moment and looked into his beautiful eyes, suddenly feeling lost in them as he looked at her like a lost little boy. She had to admit that she felt a strong attraction towards him and though she knew it was probably wrong she did want to get to know him better. Now that it was obvious that there was no Mrs Orange she realised she felt strangely happy. 'What would your head-teacher think?'

'Sod my head-teacher. You're hanging out at my house to escape the snow - that's all.' Jason replied, taking a step towards her and linking fingers with her.

Jess looked down at their hands feeling slightly confused. In one breath he was telling her that she was simply hanging out, but by holding her hand he was sending her another message. 'So if I'm simply hanging out here when are you going to offer me a hot drink? It seems that Gary is the only one round here looking after guests,' she said quietly, raising her eyes back up to look deep into his.

Jason abruptly dropped her hands and looked at her apologetically. 'Goodness, where are my manners? Would you like tea or coffee or I do have some hot chocolate somewhere?' he gestured with his head to follow him into the kitchen.

Jess felt a flash of momentary disappointment that he'd let go of her hands. 'I'll have a coffee please,' she replied, following him into the kitchen where Gary and Ruby were busy getting mugs out of the cupboards.

'Ah, hello you two,' Gary said, looking at them as they entered the huge kitchen diner. 'Me and Ruby were just saying we should have a drink and then go make a snowman before it gets dark. What do you think?'

Jess nodded mutely, her eyes nearly popping out of her head at the sight of the sleek kitchen with it's black shiny worktops and pristine looking appliances. She wondered whether he ever used the kitchen it was so clean.

Half an hour later they'd finished their drinks and were making their way back down the stairs to the communal garden to build the snowman. As they reached the bottom floor Ruby grabbed hold of Jason's hand in excitement. 'Come on Mr Orange! How about we make one on our own and see if we can do it quicker than mummy and Gary.'

Jess watched as Jason and Ruby rushed through the double doors and out into the garden which was covered in a thick blanket of untouched snow.

'Looks like it's me, Tilly and you against Ruby and Jay.' Gary chuckled, leading Jason's niece out into the snow with them. Tilly screamed shrilly at the top of her voice and let go of Gary's gloved hand as she glimpsed the untouched thick snow lying in the garden and raced ahead of them, desperate to catch up with Ruby and Jason.

'I'd say it's just you and me, Gary.' Jess laughed, nodding in the direction of Tilly. She had already ingratiated herself into Jason, Mae and Ruby's little group, without so much of a backwards glance at either Gary or Jess.

'I think you're right. I still reckon we could build a snowman quicker than those three though.' Gary dropped to his knees and immediately began to frantically scoop up snow and pat it into a rudimentary shape which vaguely resembled the base of a snowman.

Half an hour later it was quite obvious that Jess and Gary's snowman was a much bigger and better effort than Jason's would ever be. Ruby, Mae and Tilly had given up after just ten minutes, realising that building snowmen wasn't all it was cracked up to be. Despite Jason's best efforts to coax them back to help him, they'd spent the last twenty minutes lying in the snow making Snow Angels.

'I'd say me and Jess have won this, wouldn't you?' Gary smirked, gesturing up and down their snowman.

'Well I didn't exactly have much in the way of help, did I?' Jason replied, pretending to be annoyed and nodding in the direction of the young girls, who by now were standing up and dusting the snow off themselves and laughing hysterically. The snow was by now so deep that it nearly reached the tops of their little wellington boots.

'And I thought you were supposed to be a teacher,' Jess retorted teasingly and raising her eyebrows at him.

'So they say,' Jason replied, giving up on the snowman and yanking his gloves off so he could blow on his cold fingers. Even with thick gloves on the coldness of the snow had seeped through and his hands were now freezing.

'Maybe you should go back to being a world famous pop-star,' Jess mused, her head to one side as she studied his snowman.

'Never....' Jason muttered, visibly shuddering at the thought of the screaming women and no private life. He fixed a brooding gaze on Jess, thinking how unusual it was that she hadn't recognised him the first time she'd met him at Ruby's parent evening. 'Do you want to join us upstairs for a carpet picnic?' he asked, as the snow began to fall again and settle onto her red curls.

'I'd love to.' Jess said softly, staring into his striking blue eyes once more. He really did have the most amazing eyes, she thought to herself beginning to feel lost in them.

Jason shot her a huge smile, feeling strangely relieved that she'd agreed. 'Come on then, lets go!' he gestured towards the door leading up to the flat where Ruby, Tilly and Gary had just disappeared through.

By the time they got back to his flat Gary had let the others into Jason's flat using the spare key which Jason had given him. He was already in the flat getting their picnic ready, whistling away as he did so. Ruby and Tilly were already sitting on the carpet playing with Tilly's dolls while they waited for their tea.

'Is there anything I can do to help?' Jess asked, stepping into the kitchen.

'No. I'm fine. You and Jay go into the lounge and I'll be done in a minute. It's just a case of putting everything on plates and then everyone can just help themselves.' Gary shooed her off in the direction of the lounge. 

Jess went and sat down on the chocolate brown leather sofa in the lounge and idly watched the girls playing with their dolls and holding an imaginary conversation between them, complete with fake American accents. She wondered where Jason was as she snuggled into the fluffy cream cushions and began to relax as the warmth of the heating in the flat began to seep into her bones.

As Jason entered the lounge, he saw that Jess was fast asleep and smiled to himself that obviously the busy day coupled with the warmth of the flat had taken it out of her. It was at that moment that Gary chose to arrive with their carpet picnic, waving his hand with a flourish as if he was a posh waiter on the Orient Express. Jason rushed over to the cabinet and pulled out a large picnic blanket, laying it in front of the cosy log fire so that Gary could place the huge tray on top.

Jess awoke and gazed around dazedly, as if trying to work out where she was. 'How long was I gone for?' she asked, feeling slightly embarassed that she might have been caught snoring or dribbling.

'Ooh, about two hours...' Gary consulted his watch and screwed up his face as if he was trying to work it out.

'No, I wasn't. Was I?' Jess felt confused - it had only felt a matter of minutes.

'He's joking with you, Jess.' Jason said softly, his fingers itching to brush away the stray hair which was stuck to her cheek where it had been pressed against the sofa as she slept.

Jess smiled shyly at him, thinking how handsome he was once more. They were momentarily disturbed by Gary clearing his voice to get their attention and saying the food was ready, before kneeling down and placing it onto the blanket gently.

They ate their food in relative quiet, the fire crackling away in the background as they did so. The girls were pretending to feed the dolls the picnic food and the atmosphere was one of happy contentment.

Once they were finished Jason took the empty plates into the kitchen and Gary wandered over to the window to gaze out at the still falling snow. It hadn't let up at all and in fact it was falling even heavier than before. 'It's getting very deep out there,' he remarked, turning to look at where Jess was sitting on the sofa.

'Will I be alright getting home?' she asked, her voice wavering worriedly at the thought of driving home alone with Ruby in the car in such bad weather.

Gary rubbed his chin and gestured for Jason to come over and take a look too as he walked back in the room. 'Have you seen the state of it out there. I don't know about you, but I'm not happy that Jess is driving home in that tonight. It looks treacherous.'

Jason turned and looked at Jess and she could see that it in his eyes that it wouldn't be wise to leave until the morning. 'I agree with Gary. It's up to you, but I don't think it would be safe. The roads would be so dangerous. If you have my bed with Ruby. Tilly can go in the box room Gaz and Mae will sleep in the second room and I'll sleep in here. What do you think?' 

Jess thought for a moment, not liking the thought of driving home at all. 'Yes. I'd like that. I'd like that a lot,' she said softly as she made up her mind.

Jason looked immediately much happier and fixed her with a relieved smile. 'Well, seeing as you're staying, how about I open us a bottle of wine?'


	13. Chapter 13

The clock struck 7pm and Jess fixed Ruby with a serious look. 'I think it's time for bed soon, don't you?'

'But mummy, it's a weekend. Can I not have half an hour more?' Ruby's voice raised an octave as she looked at Jess, disappointment etched on her features. 'Besides, I don't have any pyjamas!'

'Well as long as you don't mind wearing boys pyjamas, I have a spare set here for when my nephew Nathan stays over. He's a little younger than you, but he's taller. Come with me Ruby and we'll go hunt them out,' Jason suggested, holding his hand out for Ruby to take. He shot a look in Jess's direction, 'I'm afraid I don't have any spare pyjamas for you, but you're welcome to borrow one of my shirts if you like?' he beckoned for her to follow him.

Jess unfolded herself from where she was sitting on the sofa and walked over to them both. 'Yes please, that would be very kind of you Mr Orange,' she said politely and followed him and Ruby out of the room.

Jason's bedroom was huge, with floor to ceiling windows and looked out over the vista of Manchester below. The lights twinkled below and as far into the distance as the eye could see. The walls were painted in duck egg blue, and it had light oak flooring and the room was dominated by a super king size antique style bed. Jess's eyes were on stalks as she spun around in stupefied silence. The bedroom alone was nearly as big as the compact upstairs in her house. Jason hadn't noticed her looking agog at everything and headed over to the built in wardrobes where he located a crisp, white shirt for Jess and handed it to her. 

'Is this where me and Ruby will be sleeping tonight?' Jess asked, her voice incredulous. She could see a closed door leading off the bedroom, which she guessed was a bathroom and the whole bedroom was virtually clear of personal possessions apart from a couple of aftershave bottles, 2 guitars in a stand in the corner and a couple of books on the bedside table. There was also a huge bookshelf along one wall containing hundreds of books, all in alphabetical order if she wasn't very much mistaken. She dreaded to think what he'd make of their cluttered, well lived in little house. 

'If you're ok sharing my double with Ruby? Come on, Nathan's pyjamas are in the spare room,' he led them down the hallway into what was quite clearly the box room. It contained a set of bunk beds and a toy box with kids toys in it. 'The room my nieces and nephews stay in,' Jason explained, retrieving a set of boys pyjamas from the cupboard and handing them to Jess.

'Yes, I'm sure we'll be more than comfortable. Though we really would be ok sleeping in the lounge,' Jess replied softly, feeling embarrassed that he was having to vacate his bed for the two of them.

'No, honestly, it's fine. You get Ruby dressed in here and I'll go strip my bed and put clean bedclothes on there for you. I did change them yesterday, but I'm sure you'd rather have new sheets,' Jason threw over his shoulder as he went to leave the room.

'Mr Orange, please don't do that on my account. We're just grateful for a bed for the night,' 

'Are you sure?' Jason turned around to look at her.

'Definitely. I'm sure we'll cope. I assume you shower?' Jess coloured in embarrassment as her mind immediately conjured up the thought of him naked in the shower, his head thrown back and the water hammering on him. 

Jason chuckled lightly and nodded. At least once a week. Twice if I have a parents evening,' he joked, noticing Jess flush and wondering what had caused it, not for a moment imagining she was thinking of him in a shower. 'I'll leave you to sort out Ruby. Would you like red or white wine if I go and open a bottle?'

'White please. Dry if you have one?' Jess replied, and turned to help Ruby with her jumper as her hair was caught in the buttons on the neck.

'Ok, I'll go and fix you a glass,' Jason opened the bedroom door and left her to get Ruby changed.

'I like Mr Orange. He's nicer than my daddy, don't you think?' Ruby's voice was muffled by the jumper as Jess pulled it gently over her head.

'He's very nice, Rubes. But I'm sure he's nice to everyone,' Jess remarked, thinking he'd been very generous in offering them a bed for the night.

'Why do you think he doesn't have any children or a wife, mummy?'

'I have no idea, darling. It's not really my place to say.'

'Do you think he has a girlfriend maybe?' Ruby continued in the same vein of questioning, her curiosity piqued now that she was in his flat.

'Rubes, I really have no idea. You're not to ask him either,' she swiftly interjected, thinking knowing how guileless Ruby was she'd ask him without preamble. She'd bet someone who looked like him would at least have a girlfriend - especially as other mum's had said he'd shown absolutely no interest in any of them and that wasn't from lack of them trying. If he wasn't interested there must be a girlfriend in the background surely?

When they got back in the lounge Jason had already poured Jess a large glass of white wine and set it on the table next to the sofa. He went off to put Tilly in her room to sleep, before returning a few minutes later when she was settled. He sat down on the floor on top of the furry cream rug, his glass of wine next to him, as he sat with his back against the bottom of the sofa. The fire was ablaze in the wall opposite, warming Jason's feet which stuck out in front of him.

Ruby went over and sat next to Jason and looked up at him from under her lashes. Jess shot her a warning look to remind her of their conversation in the bedroom. 'Mr Orange, do you want to do some drawing with me?'

'Sure Ruby. There's some colouring books in that unit over there and some pencils,' he looked up to Jess sitting on the sofa and gave her a contented smile. 'I always have stuff here for when my nieces and nephews come here,' he explained, taking a sip of his wine while Ruby wandered over to the unit he'd indicated.

Ruby retrieved the pencils and colouring books and sat back down next to Jason. 'Mr Orange, what are you really called?'

'I'm Jason. But you can't call me that at school. Ok? It's not allowed. But you can call me that tonight,'

Ruby gave him a big grin. 'Can mummy call you Jason tonight too?'

Jason shot an amused glance up at Jess. He laughed softly at Jess's embarrassed expression. 'If she likes. Though I'm Mr Orange at school too. Your mummy has to call me that when she collects you from school.'

Gary sat across the other side of the room with Mae by now asleep in his arms, watching in amusement at the interplay between Jason, Jess and Ruby. Unless he was mistaken, he noticed Ruby hero-worshipped Jason and he had a little soft spot for her too. Jason's and Ruby's dark heads were both bent close to each other as Ruby coloured a rainbow and Jason coloured in a castle and princess for her to hang on her wall at home. Both had their tongues clamped between their lips in concentration and anyone looking in from the outside would assume they were father and daughter. 

Jess was looking very relaxed as she watched them with her wine glass in her hand. It hadn't escaped her notice how good Jason was with Ruby and her heart ached that Steve simply didn't have any closeness with his own daughter. It was obvious to her that seeing Ruby was a chore to him.

'Bedtime Ruby, ' Jess said, as the clock struck 8.30pm. Ruby stuck her bottom lip out in annoyance, but put down her pencils and stood up obediently. 'Goodnight Jason. Thank you for colouring with me and letting me have a sleepover,' 

Jason put his pencil down and gave her big smile as she gave him a hug goodnight, his heart contracting slightly at how cute she was. 'Goodnight Ruby, see you in the morning,' he ruffled her hair affectionately and gave her a little wave as Jess led her out of the room.

Gary stood up clumsily with Mae still in his arms. 'I'll go put Mae to bed and stay in there with her and watch some TV. She might not settle if I leave her in a room she's not used to.'

'Night mate,' Jason replied, yawning slightly and smiled at him.

A few minutes later Jess was back and sat down on the sofa next to where Jason was now sitting. 'Thank you for putting us up tonight Jason, I'm really grateful,'

'Ah, it's no problem at all,' he looked up at Jess, thinking how pretty she looked with her pink cheeks and titian coloured hair piled up in a ponytail. She was totally not his type, but she had something he couldn't put his finger on which he found slightly bewitching. 

'I take it you'd rather I didn't mention this to anyone, Jason? I don't want to get you into trouble with your head-teacher if he found out.'

Jason hesitated for a moment and licked his lips. They weren't doing anything wrong, but it might cause gossip between the parents if it got out, he realised. 'Maybe best not to. If that's ok with you?'

Jess nodded in agreement. 'No, that's fine. I won't say anything. As it is, a lot of the mum's speculate if there's anyone special in your life. I don't want to add more fuel to the fire,' she took a sip of her wine, flushing slightly as she vocalised what some of the mums conversations had been about. 'I don't get involved as I don't really know any of them,' she added hastily, in case he thought she too had been gossiping about him. 

Jason already knew Jess didn't really have much in common with a lot of the other mums as she often stood with another woman, who he guessed was maybe her sister judging how similar they looked. He knew the clique she was referring to, as they all stood together in a huddle in the playground as they waited for their kids to come out of the classroom. They all made it obvious they'd eat him for breakfast given the chance.

'Well I don't have a girlfriend or a wife. I haven't had one since I left the band. I've been so busy getting my teaching qualification I've not had time,' Jason wasn't sure why he wanted to let Jess know there was nobody important in his life. He stood up and sat the opposite end of the sofa to Jess, his glass of wine in his hand as he angled himself so he was looking at her.

'What was it like being in the band?' Jess asked softly, she wasn't particularly a fan of Take That, though she liked some of their newer stuff since they'd reformed.

'The first time around it was fun most of the time, though towards the end it just got a bit much. I think my mental health suffered badly with the total lack of privacy, the amount of fans who wanted a piece of us and to be really blunt the amount of girls I slept with. The second time was a lot better - well at first. But by the time we got to Progress I was just burnt out. It might sound fun to have 80,000 screaming at you night after night and trying to get into your room after you've performed, but I'd just had enough. I couldn't take any more. Don't get me wrong, I loved the performing part - I just couldn't deal with all that went with it. We were touring for over 2 months and played 35 dates throughout Europe. I was living out of a suitcase all that time and the dance off I did every night with Howard was exhausting.'

Jess looked at him and could see his point, even talking about it she could see he felt torn with his emotions. She wanted to hug him as he sat with his head down while he struggled to explain how it had felt. She reached between the gap in the sofa and took his hand in hers. She fought back the overwhelming urge to stroke the soft, dark hair at the nape of his neck, as she breathed in the soft tang of his aftershave.

Jason lifted his head and looked Jess square in the eye. She had the most amazing green eyes he realised, fighting the overwhelming need to kiss her. Jess stared straight back, completely lost in his cerulean blue eyes, framed with long, dark lashes. Without his glasses on his eyes were all the more beautiful.

Clearing his throat, he waited a beat to collect his thoughts. 'So, where is Mr Shaw then? I know Ruby mentioned her dad to me.'

Jess paused for a moment as she pondered how to explain the lack of parental input from Steve. 'He um is living with his new wife Cheryl and their new baby down south.'

'And does Ruby see much of him?' Jason guessed from the way Ruby spoke that it wasn't very much.

'Not really. It's almost like he's forgotten she exists. It breaks my heart, Jason! He has her for a few days during the kids holidays, but he doesn't really want to do it, and I don't think she feels particularly welcome. His new wife makes it pretty obvious she doesn't want her there,' Jess's face bore a look of extreme sadness as she thought about how down Ruby was whenever she came home and how tightly she wanted Jess to cuddle her as soon as she was back home.

Jason continued to stroke Jess's hand as she spoke about Ruby and felt so sad for her. He'd guessed as much from the family picture she'd drawn and odd snippets she'd said. 'She's a lovely kid, Jess. I can't believe her dad doesn't really want to be part of that. If I had a child - even if I wasn't with it's mother anymore I'd want to be part of it's upbringing.'

'Like Gary does with Mae?'

'Exactly,' he raised his glass to his lips and took a swallow, his eyes still fixed on hers. He felt completely lost in her eyes as she lifted her wine glass and took a sip as she tried valiantly to tear her eyes away from his gaze.

Jess felt confused as he continued to hold her hand. Her heart hammered in her chest as she studied his long fingers stroking hers and his aftershave assaulted her senses yet again. She wanted him to kiss her and felt stupid for even thinking such a thing. Why would he want a woman with baggage like her? A woman whose ex hadn't even fancied her enough to stay faithful to her? And one with a less than perfect body too?

Jason shifted towards Jess and studied her, wondering what she was thinking. 'Jess, what are you thinking?' he asked softly.

Jess flushed beetroot red and wondered if he could read her thoughts. The way he was looking intently at her made her think maybe he could.

'You want me to kiss you, don't you?' Jason leant forward and cupped her flushed cheek in his hand as he waited for her answer.

Jess nodded as his thumb grazed her lips and she fought against the instinct to open her mouth and kiss the pad of his thumb. 'But it'll make things complicated...' she trailed off, as Jason moved forward and gently kissed her on the lips before she could stop him. Their kiss deepened as he put his arms around her and drew her closer to him, so he could smell her soft perfume. Jess moved her hands up to touch his face and opened her mouth as his tongue slipped inside and her entire insides turned to liquid. He was the most amazing kisser, she realised as his stubble rasped against her fingertips.

Jason felt Jess's arms go around him and her fingers stroked the bare skin on his back where his thin black sweater had ridden up and left a sliver of skin bare above his jeans. He continued kissing her, revelling in the feeling of her fingertips skittering across his skin. As they broke their kiss, he drew back, his hand gripping the top of the sofa as he gazed down at her, thinking he wanted to throw caution to the wind. 'Jess, can I take you on a proper date next week?'

Jess sat up, her lips slightly swollen from where they'd been kissing and nodded. 'Yes, I'd like that a lot, Jason.'


	14. Chapter 14

Jason disappeared off into the kitchen to retrieve the bottle of wine. He heard the door open to his bedroom and guessed Jess had gone to check on Ruby. Pulling the bottle out of the fridge, he stood for a moment with it clasped to his chest whilst he processed what had taken place with Jess in the lounge. He had to admit he'd liked kissing her, feeling her respond to him as their kiss had deepened. There was a tiny part of him which felt a degree of trepidation about getting tangled with a woman who had an ex and a daughter, but there was something about her which drew him inexplicably towards her. With clarity, he realised he fancied her, he liked her as a person and he wanted to get to know her better and to hell with the consequences. He knew at some point he would have to tell the head teacher, but there was nothing to say they couldn't date each other if they so wished.

Jess walked in the room and saw he was deep in thought. 'A penny for your thoughts?' she asked, taking the wine bottle from his hand.

'I was thinking about you actually,' he admitted with a grin, winding an arm around her waist and drawing her back towards him to kiss her. 

Jess felt herself melt into his arms as they stood in the kitchen kissing. The edge of the kitchen island pressed into her back as Jason pushed her against it, trapping her there. She put the wine bottle down behind her and wound her arms around his neck, her fingers touched the hairs at the nape of his neck as his tongue played with hers. It was so long since she'd kissed anyone and never with anyone who kissed like this.

Pulling away, Jason looked at her. 'I was thinking about what it is about you that is making me break the one rule I made to myself before I started this job,' he stood with his head on one side as he studied her.

'And that was?' Jess asked, half guessing that it was not to get involved with a parent. 

'To meet someone like you. I said I wouldn't get involved with a parent.'

'So why me then? You surely know I have baggage?' Jess asked, stating the obvious. 'I have a child. I have an ex husband. And I sure as hell don't have a body like one of those dancers I've seen when you performed Love Love on the TV.' In the recesses of her mind she did remember seeing a live performance a few years ago. She loved the song when she had heard it and remembered seeing them surrounded by beautiful dancers. It was one of the only Take That songs she did have on her Spotify account.

'Sometimes it's not about those things though is it, Jess? Sometimes there's just an attraction there. I want to get to know you as a person - not as Ruby's mum. That's why I asked you on a date. Besides, I bet you have a banging body under that jumper,' he laughed dirtily and winked at her. 

Jess blushed, thinking if only that were true about having a banging body. She twisted around and picked up the bottle, 'come on, let's finish this and then I'd best get to bed.'

Jess's phone buzzed loudly as they went back in the lounge. Picking it up from the table by the sofa, she keyed in her password and saw her mum had texted. She swiftly replied, her fingers tapping quickly as she typed her reply. 'It's my mum checking we're ok. She lives around the corner from me. She rang my home phone to check our heating was ok - it's been a bit temperamental. As I haven't rung her back she was checking we're ok.'

Jason took a sip of his wine. He vaguely remembered Jess's mum sometimes dropping and picking Ruby up on occasion. 'Where did you tell her you are?'

'I hate telling white lies, but I just said I came round a friend's house and as the snow got so bad we decided to have a sleepover.' She wasn't ready to tell her mum she was at Jason's as that would mean her sister Danni would know within minutes and she wanted to see where things went before she said anything. Like Jason she was a fairly private person and didn't want to be the subject of idle gossip. 

An hour later Jess yawned. They'd been sitting talking non stop the whole time. Jason's arm was stretched along the back of the sofa behind her head, his hand cupping the back of her head as his fingers strayed in the hair of her ponytail. She had to admit he was fascinating as they touched on music, books, political views and many other topics and found they agreed on a lot of things. 'I think I need to go to bed. I'm shattered.'

'Ok, I'll just pop into my room and get a spare quilt for me in here from the top of the wardrobe,' he followed her down the hallway. 

Opening the door, Jess could see Ruby fast asleep in Jason's bed from the light spilling in from the hallway. She looked tiny as the bed was so big.

'Looks like you'll be sleeping on my favourite side of the bed,' Jason remarked, noticing Ruby snoring away for all she was worth on the right hand side of the bed as he wandered across to the wardrobe and retrieved a spare quilt, before dropping a swift kiss on her lips and leaving her to go to bed.

Jess opened the door to the bathroom and once again was amazed at how impressive it was. There was an old fashioned style bath with steps leading up to a raised platform with the same views across Manchester as the lounge had. She imagined it must be amazing bathing there in the dark with all the twinkling lights as far as the eye could see. There was a wet-room style shower in a palette of cream and brown and she spied he'd left out a cream coloured fluffy towel for her and Ruby. Switching on the shower, she stepped out of her jeans and tossed her jumper and underwear on top and stepped inside. 

She had just finished doing up the last button on his shirt when there was a soft tap at the door.

'Sorry Jess, it's Jay. Do you need a toothbrush?' he whispered through the wooden door. 

Jess opened the door a crack to see him standing in the hallway in just a pair of pyjama bottoms and a winning smile on his face. 'If you have a spare one that would be great.' she opened the door wider to allow him in. 

'I think I have one in the bathroom. I just can't remember exactly where. Give me a minute and I'll find you one,' he pushed past her, his hand brushing her arm as he walked past.

Jess's eyes followed him into the bathroom 'holy mother of god...' she trailed off. The pyjamas accentuated his lean, tanned body as they hung low on his hips. There wasn't an ounce of fat on his body and she realised why so many of the mums at school were in raptures about him. If some were fans they obviously knew what he looked like under his daytime clothes. A moment later he came back out of the bathroom, the toothbrush and toothpaste held aloft and a grin on his face. Jess couldn't take her eyes off him - the front was even better than the back, she realised. His abs were well defined from the time he obviously spent at the gym and a trail of dark hair led from his belly button into his pyjama bottoms. 

Jason handed her the brush and toothpaste and couldn't help but notice that she was openly staring at him as he turned to leave. Jess followed him to the door and it was then as he turned to shut the door he saw she was wearing his shirt. It was a perfect fit and ended just below her underwear. She looked absolutely beautiful with her hair tied in a top-knot to keep her hair dry. A few tendrils had escaped and were damp and he noticed she had the most amazing legs, which ended in lilac painted toe-nails. 'The shirt suits you. It looks better on you than me,' he remarked as his eyes raked up and down so she was in no doubt he liked what he saw.

Jess flushed in embarrassment and leant against the door, angling her body slightly behind it as the shirt was so short and didn't leave much to the imagination. 

'Goodnight Jess. You look beautiful. I'll see you in the morning.' he cupped her cheek in his hand and kissed her, before heading off into the lounge to sleep.

Jess clicked off the light and slid into bed next to Ruby who was still fast asleep. Snuggling down, she could smell Jason's scent lingering on the pillow and smiled a small smile to herself. She couldn't believe someone like him would be in the slightest bit interested in her. Let alone kiss her as passionately as he had. Just the thought of his kisses made her tingle all over.

Jess was up bright and early the following morning. As always, Ruby had woken her around 7am and this morning her favourite topic was Jason. 'Do you think Jason slept ok mummy? Do you think we should check on him?'

'I think it's a bit early, Ruby,'

'Do you like him?'

'Of course I do Ruby' Jess replied, cuddling Ruby into the crook of her mum as she looked down at her. 'He must be great to have as a teacher,' 

'No mummy. I meant do you like him like you used to like daddy?'

Jess hesitated for a beat, wondering where she got her inate ability to read a situation so well. 'That was different Ruby. I married your daddy and we had you. I don't know Jason very well'.

'But you like him?' Ruby persisted, now that she was on her favourite subject.

Jess sighed, knowing she would never get anything past her daughter. 'Yes I do. He's very nice. But when you go back to school you must keep quiet that we stayed here as he was being kind to put us up for the night and your head-teacher might not like it. Ok?'

Ruby nodded and gave her mum a big smile. 'Yes, I won't say anything. Can we go and wake Jason now?'

'Ok. Just let me put my jeans on,' Jess replied, remembering again Jason's eyes when he'd seen how short his shirt was on her.

'We could make him breakfast,' Ruby suggested, throwing the duvet back and jumping out of bed in excitement.


	15. Chapter 15

Jess and Ruby tiptoed quietly down the hallway towards the lounge. 'Do you think he'll be angry?' Ruby asked Jess quietly, suddenly wondering if her bright idea was a good one after all.

'We'll open the door and see if he's awake, shall we? I can't imagine Jason ever being angry about anything, he's so gentle,' Jess whispered, squeezing Ruby's hand as they pushed the door open and peered inside.

Padding softly over to the sofa in the half-light, Jess’s heart skipped a little beat at how handsome Jason looked asleep. She had to admit he was beautiful for a man. His hair was sleep rumpled and his angular features were softened by light stubble. He had the most kissable lips and it was all she could do not to bend down and kiss him. She knew if Ruby hadn't been there she may well have actually done so.

Jason's eyes flickered open as he sensed someone was in the room with him. For a moment he felt disorientated, momentarily forgetting he was asleep on the sofa and it took him a fraction of a second to work out why Jess and Ruby were looking down at him. 

'Hi Mr Orange! Can me and mummy make you breakfast?' Ruby asked, bouncing about with anticipation.

Jason yawned and pushed the duvet back, swinging his legs over the side of the sofa with a grin as he did so. 'Of course you can. That would be lovely. I'll just go and check on Tilly and then I'll come and join you in the kitchen. Is that ok?'

Five minutes later he walked in the kitchen, balancing Tilly on his hip before sitting her down to give her some breakfast. 'So what are you ladies cooking me for breakfast then? he asked, as he began spooning porridge into Tilly's mouth.

'Can we make you pancakes, Mr Orange? Me and mummy make them sometimes and mummy says I make the best ones ever in the whole wide world.' Ruby stretched her arms outwards to gesture how good they were.

'Well if your mummy says that you're the best pancake maker in the whole, wide world I'd better have them, hadn't I Ruby?' he grinned at her childish exuberance and nodded towards the cupboard. 'You'll find flour in there and eggs next to the cupboard. I think I have a bowl in the cupboard below.'

Whilst he continued to feed Tilly, Jess and Ruby busied themselves making pancakes once Jess had tied an apron around Ruby's pyjamas. He smiled softly, thinking what a lovely scene of domestic bliss they made - just the four of them and his heart ached that he'd never been lucky enough to experience it really before.

The kitchen door opened and Gary appeared, carrying Mae in his arms. 'Ooh, pancakes! My favourite! Is there enough for me?' he asked, rubbing his hands gleefully together as he put Mae down in the high chair.

Ruby had her tongue clamped tightly between her lips as she concentrated mixing the eggs into the flour. 'No,' she replied simply and went back to her mixing.

'That's you told, Gaz!' Jason cracked up laughing at the sight of Gary's face as he was firmly put in his place by Ruby, who wasn't in the least bit star-struck.

'Ruby!!!' Jess put her hands over her eyes at her daughter's short reply. 'I'm sure we can spare some for Gary.'

'Ok, I suppose so...' Ruby trailed off, feeling somewhat disappointed that she couldn't give them all to Jason. She liked Gary, but Jason was her favourite.

'I'm sure I won't be able to manage them all Ruby. I'll share them with Gary.' Jason chuckled.

Ruby shrugged and began to pour in the milk a little at the time as she'd done many times before when making them at home.

Ten minutes later they were all cooked and they all sat down together to eat them at Jason's kitchen table. 'I think you may well be right Ruby. I think you really are the best pancake maker in the whole wide world,' Jason remarked chewing thoughtfully on the last piece of pancake which Jess had plated up with strawberries, bananas and a dusting of icing sugar.

Ruby smiled a huge smile and continued eating her pancake. 'Thank you, Mr Orange.'

Putting his fork down on his plate, Jason fixed Ruby with a serious look. 'Ruby, you can call me Jason today too. It's only at school you have to call me Mr Orange. You mustn't forget to call me that when you're there. Ok?'

Ruby smiled a big smile and nodded. 'Ok. Can we stay a bit longer? Can you teach me some guitar?'

'Ruby!! It's very rude to invite yourself over! Jason might be busy today,' Jess shot him a mortified look and blushed beetroot red, mouthing the word sorry over Ruby's head.

Jason waved away her concerns, thinking he was having a great time. 'I have a bit of marking that I need to do and Jackie is coming to pick up Tilly. The marking will take me an hour and then I'm all yours and Ruby's if you like? Besides, the weather is dismal still out there.'

Jess went over to the window and noticed the snow was turning to slush, but there was a lot of it. 'As long as you don't mind?' 

'No, not at all. I'm just going to have a shower then I'll help you clear up here'. He stood up, affording her another glimpse of his fabulous washboard stomach with its dusting of dark hairs below his belly button which led down into his pyjama bottoms, as he absentmindedly scratched his stomach. He dropped a kiss unthinkingly on top of Jess's head, before pushing past her, his hands on her shoulders as he did so.

'Mummy, he kissed you....' Ruby whispered loudly, as he left the room. She could hardly believe what she'd seen with her own eyes.

Jess didn't know what to say. She realised Jason hadn't even really thought what he was doing as he'd kissed her unthinkingly. 

Gary watched the conversation taking place between Jess and Ruby and interrupted, guessing that Jess didn't know what to say. He guessed there had been more than just talk which had taken place the evening before when he'd gone to bed, judging by Jason being tactile with Jess this morning. 'He was probably forgetting himself, Ruby. Maybe he was thinking your mum was Tilly's mummy - his sister,' Gary raised his eyebrows at Jess and looked at her apologetically, as if to say that was the best excuse he could think of.

Jess gratefully smiled at Gary for trying to throw Ruby off the scent and stood up, beginning to stack plates as she did so. 'Come on Ruby, let's tidy up a little and then we'll go and get you showered and dressed when Jason has finished showering. Luckily Jason had a couple of spare sets of clean clothes which belonged to his nieces and nephews, so they'd managed to cobble together a complete outfit for Ruby - albeit some items too big. As Jackie sometimes stayed over with Tilly he also had a few of her clothes in the wardrobe and luckily they fitted Jess like a glove.

An hour later Gary had gone home with Mae as the weather looked to be improving slightly. It had stopped snowing, but it was still bitterly cold.

The four of them sat in the cosy lounge after Gary had left. Jess had found a copy of Victoria Hislop's The Island, which she'd been wanting to read in Jason's bookshelf and was immersed in the story. Ruby was playing with the dolls she'd been playing with the previous evening and they were having a tea party with Tilly and Jason was marking his pupils maths books from the previous Friday. The doorbell rang and Jason stood up, removing his reading glasses as he made his way to the door.

A couple of moments later he came back in the room followed by his sister Jackie. 'Jackie, this is Jess and Ruby,' he waved his hand in their direction. 'Coffee?'

Jackie raised an eyebrow and shook her head at his offer of coffee and said hello, wondering who exactly they were. She couldn't remember seeing a woman in the flat since before he'd left Take That. So it was highly unusual. 'No, I won't stop. It's so cold the car will ice up again if I stay. So we'll make tracks, but thanks all the same.'

'Ok, I'll get Tilly's things,' Jason wandered out of the room to get her things together for his sister, leaving the two ladies in each other's company.

'So have you known Jay long?' Jackie had to admit her interest was piqued by this pretty lady. She was so opposite to the type of girl he'd always gone for, she assumed they were just friends. Plus the addition of a daughter made it even more unlikely.

'Not long. Ruby is in Jason's class at school. We happened to bump into each other yesterday and as it was so awful weather-wise he suggested we came here to get out of the weather. When it didn't get better we ended up staying.'

'Jackie smiled at her and turned to look at Ruby. And how do you like having my brother as your teacher, Ruby?'

'He's very strict. He doesn't shout, but he gets an angry look on his face when we mess about,' Ruby replied, pretending to fill her tea cups over once again. 'My mummy likes him, she told me last night.' Ruby stated, with all the honestly only a small child would have.

Jess flushed bright red and looked like she wanted the ground to open up beneath her as Jackie's unflinching gaze swung back to her as she tried to work out exactly what Ruby meant. Just as Jess thought she might have to explain herself, Jason came back in the room with all of Tilly's paraphernalia and Jess let out a sigh of relief as Jackie took it off him. 

'Well, nice to meet you both,' Jackie picked up Tilly and gave them a little wave goodbye as Jason led her to the front door where Tilly's pushchair was assembled ready to put her in. 'So what's going on with you and Jess?' she whispered, looking up at Jason as she fastened Tilly in.

'What do you mean?' Jason painted an innocent look on his face. He hadn't really discussed his love life when he was in the band and he wasn't about to start now. 

'Jay, for one she has a kid - so I assume there's a dad somewhere in the background, two she's older than you've gone for in the past and three her kid is one of your pupils,' Jackie hissed under her breath, so Jess wouldn't hear.

Jason realised Jackie wasn't going anywhere until he responded, as she stood and looked at him expectantly. 'Dad isn't really on the scene much as they're divorced and we're not doing anything we shouldn't. It's not serious and even if it was we aren't breaking any laws. And in the grand scheme of things age is just a number. That's why I left the band. There's only so long that you can be single and screw around with twenty somethings before you get a reputation. While I was in the band that's all I was ever going to meet - twenty somethings who wanted to say they'd banged a member of Take That. Yes, Jess is a bit older, but she's still stunning. She might not look like my type, but I think she's pretty and she's also a nice person. She didn't even realise who I was in my old life. So she's not after my money, if that's what you're thinking.'

Jackie looked at him appraisingly, shocked to hear him suddenly spill out his innermost thoughts. 'She likes you.' she said softly, touching his hand with hers. 'Ruby told me. Poor Jess looked mortified when she let it out.

Jason grinned. 'Well that's good. I like her too. I've asked her out on a date next weekend.'

Jackie stood up and planted a kiss on his cheek, giving him a small smile. 'Well, you enjoy yourselves. It's about time you started dating as I was beginning to think you were going to join the priesthood,' she laughed softly and opened the front door. 'Thanks for looking after Tilly.'

'You're welcome,' he replied softly and went back to join Ruby and Jess as the door clicked shut behind Jackie.


	16. Chapter 16

An hour later Jason was finished with his marking and fixed Ruby with a smile. 'Would you like a little guitar lesson?' he swiftly tidied the exercise books into the bag Jess had seen him carrying in the playground.

Ruby didn't need asking twice and jumped up from the floor. 'Yes please!'

Jess smiled indulgently and returned to reading her book as Ruby and Jason disappeared into Jason's bedroom for one of his guitars. She was finding the story fascinating set on the island of Spinalonga, with it's leper colony and the interwoven love story between the two main characters.

As Ruby and Jason came back into the room with his guitar, Jason looked over at Jess and saw she was still absorbed in the book and looked like she was already a third of the way through it. 'You're enjoying the book?' he asked, taking the guitar off Ruby so she could sit back down. He'd noticed the guitar was nearly as big as she was.

'Oh god, my heart is breaking for Eleni and Giorgis already. Can you imagine finding out the love of your life and the mother of your kids has a serious illness like Leprosy and having to abandon her? His heart must have broken to have to take her over to that island by boat and just leave her there.'

'I don't cry a lot. But that book sure did make me at the end. You can take it home, but be sure to have the tissues as it's sad. But nice sad if you know what I mean?' Jason looked slightly embarrassed as he admitted to crying at a book and thought she would now think what a soppy twat he was.

Jess nodded in agreement. 'Yes, I know what you mean,' she had to admit that she thought it was kind of cute that he had a sensitive side and wasn't afraid to tell her.

Jason sat down beside Ruby, his legs stuck out in front of him as he checked it was tuned correctly, before leaning his head towards Ruby's so she could see what he was doing.

'Is it ok to make a coffee?' Jess asked, thinking now would be the best time to ask before the pair of them became to engrossed in the guitar lesson.

'Of course. Would you make me a peppermint tea while you're making your coffee?' he asked, shooting a grateful look at her.

'Yes of course,' Jess replied and headed off into the kitchen. She poked about in his cupboards looking for the coffee and peppermint tea bags. His cupboards put hers to shame, she realised. Nearly everything was healthy rabbit food and very little in the way of junk food. She eventually found the cupboard which she guessed was for when his nieces and nephews came. It contained crisps, biscuits and mini packets of dried fruit. She idly wondered whether he ever got the munchies and raided it. She eventually found the tea bags in the last cupboard she came to and after popping a tea bag in his cup and a spoonful of caffeine free instant coffee into another cup for herself, she flicked the switch on his kettle.

When Jess entered the lounge a few minutes later, she smiled as she saw by now Ruby was sat in the gap between Jason's outstretched legs her face a study of concentration with the guitar sitting on her lap on top of her crossed legs. Jason had looped the strap over her shoulder so it was more secure. He was holding the neck of the guitar and Ruby's little hand was below his hand. 'So, you see here you have strings one to six and they go this way. They each have a letter - E,A,D,G,B and E. The way I remembered when I learnt was to say this sentence and each word begins with first letter of each string. It's Eat All Day, Go to Bed Early,' he angled his head to look at Ruby to check she understood what he meant and grinned proudly at her as she seemed to grasp what he meant.

Ruby nodded enthusiastically and grinned up at Jason. 'Yes, Eat All Day, Go to Bed Early,' she repeated over and over.

Jason looked up at Jess apologetically as she set the drink down on the floor next to him. 'Sorry, we're going to be a bit noisy. I figured it would be better to teach her the electric guitar as the neck is smaller for her hands. Plus the strings are narrower.'

Jess sat back down and picked up her book as she stretched out on the sofa. 'Oh goodness, that's going to be expensive if she likes it,' she murmered, instantly knowing she didn't have the kind of money she would need to buy an electric guitar and by the looks of things all the paraphernalia that went with it.

'We have a few at school, Jess. So when I start teaching her at school she can borrow one of those.' Jason smoothed down Ruby's hair, which was still sticking up from her sleep the night before.

Jess sighed a sigh of relief that there was a solution to her little dilemma. 'Well that's good. Money is a bit tight. Steve cancelled my maintenance this month.'

'Oh?' Jason's eyebrows raised as he wondered just how short of money Steve had left her. 'Is he allowed to do that?'

Jess shook her head and put her index finger to her lips, to indicate to him that she didn't want to discuss it in front of Ruby. 'I'll tell you later,' she muttered, picking up her coffee and taking a sip before she went back to her book.

Two hours later Jason stretched his arms above his head and waggled his neck about. 'Ruby, I think we've done enough. My neck and back are sore where I've been bending them to help you. Shall we get some lunch?' he leant back on his hands and looked at them both expectantly.

Jess nodded in agreement and put her book down to one side. 'I'll help you if you like?'

Jason waved away her offer. 'No, you and Ruby spoilt me this morning. I'll make you lunch,'

An hour later they'd eaten a lunch of omelette and salad for Jess and Jason and beans on toast for Ruby and had decided to watch Frozen on Netflix 'Are you tired, Ruby?' Jess stroked Ruby's hair, noticing she looked sleepy as she lay with her head in her lap.

Ruby yawned widely. 'Yes, a bit. Can I go to sleep, mummy?'

'Is it ok to put Ruby in your bed for a nap?' Jess asked, checking Jason was ok with it.

'Of course. You don't need to even ask, Jess,' 

Jason flicked about with the choice of films on Netflix whilst Jess put Ruby to bed. He figured they could watch something else as Ruby was having a snooze. Frozen wasn't exactly his film of choice unless his niece was over. He looked up as Jess came back in the room. 'Is she ok?'

Bella nodded and sat back down on the sofa next to him. 'Yes, she was awake pretty early so an hour snooze will help.'

Jason put the TV controller down and looked at Jess. 'Now Ruby is in bed can I give you a kiss? I've been wanting to kiss you all day.'

Jess moved closer to him and wrapped her arms around his waist as his arm settled on her shoulders and drew her closer to him. He tipped her chin up to look at him as their lips met in a long kiss. Jess gave herself up to the moment as their tongues met and they explored each other's mouths. He really was a good kisser, she thought to herself as her stomach flip-flopped with a mixture of nerves and lust. She sincerely hoped he couldn't tell that the only man who had kissed her was Steve.

Drawing back, Jason stared into her green eyes and dropped a final kiss onto her lips. 'So, Ruby's dad... what's the score with him?'

Jess shrugged sadly as she thought about how little Steve seemed to care about his daughter. 'I really don't know where his head is at where Ruby is concerned. He's stopped her maintenance and hasn't seen her since October half term.'

'Has he not told you why he's stopped maintenance?' Jason asked, feeling desperately sorry for Ruby, as he thought it was no wonder she'd drawn the picture in class with him standing far away from her and Jess.

'He's deliberately ignoring my calls and messages. I suspect Cheryl - his new wife is partly behind it. She's expecting their first baby together and from what I gather from Ruby she hasn't been particularly welcoming when she visits. They just stick her in front of the TV and that's it. She doesn't go anywhere nice and to be honest I hate sending her to him as she comes back so upset. She's saying she doesn't want to go anymore,' tears filled her eyes as she thought about how Ruby wasn't her usual, happy self whenever she'd been to stay there.

'If she doesn't want to go does she have to?' Jason asked. He had no clue how it worked with child maintenance and parent visits when a couple had split up.

Jess shrugged again as a tear snaked it's way down her cheek as she thought about how upset Ruby had been the last time she'd come home from Steve and Cheryl's house. 'He holds all the cards really. I think I need to maybe get a solicitor involved. There's part of me thinks I should make a complete break and tell him that Ruby doesn't want to come and I don't want his money either. Of course, if she gets older and wants to see him I'd never stop her. I just don't think it's good for her mental health. It borders on neglect the way they treat her.'

'Gaz saw a solicitor regarding access between Mae and him. I'll get the details as he was brilliant', Jason assured her, taking her in his arms and wishing he could wave a magic wand to make everything better. Hearing about how she was treated broke his heart. She was such a lovely kid, he thought to himself.

'I really do need to do some thinking.' Jess admitted, thinking she really needed to do something sooner rather than later.

Jason artfully changed the subject, thinking that it was obviously upsetting Jess talking about Ruby and Steve's lack of loving parenting. 'So, has there been anyone since you two split up?'

Jess shook her head and straightened herself up. 'Nobody. Not that anyone has asked me out.'

'Really?? I find that hard to believe!' he looked at her in shock, thinking she might not be classically beautiful, but she was stunning, with her red hair and green eyes.

'Well maybe I give off vibes I'm not interested. To be honest maybe I do. The last thing I want is a long line of "uncles" if you know what I mean?' Jess gestured the word uncle with her fingers so Jason understood what she meant. 'Just imagine her waking up and finding mummy in bed with a different bloke every week? She needs a stable upbringing and she won't get that if I go out with lots of different men.' 

'So why did you say yes to me?' Jason asked, instantly curious as to why she'd agreed to go on a date with him.

'I don't know. Women's intuition maybe?' she didn't want to admit to him that it was partly the way he spoke and interacted with Ruby that had convinced her. 'Besides, it's just a date isn't it? Nothing heavy. I'm a mum with a kid. I'm not really dating material am I?'

Jason felt a small thread of disappointment run through him. The more he got to know Jess the more he liked her. He wanted to get to know her better, but maybe she was going to keep him at arms length, he thought to himself. 'Yeah, I guess...' he trailed off, wondering whether to tell her that he actually fancied her rotten. 

'So where are you taking me for dinner?'Jess asked him, curiosity getting the better of her. She had to admit she felt more than a little disappointed that he hadn't corrected her assumption that it was merely a date.

'Do you prefer Indian or Chinese?'

Jess thought about his question for a moment before replying. 'Indian'

Jason grinned at her. 'That's my favourite too. How about I book it and I'll pick you up at 7pm on Saturday evening?'

Jess nodded and gave him a big smile. 'I'll make sure mum can sit Ruby. I'm sure it'll be fine. It will be nice to get to know each other properly.'


	17. Chapter 17

The week passed by uneventfully for both Jess and Jason. Ruby had her first proper guitar lesson at school along with a couple of other girls in her class. It had felt strange for Jess to remember to call Jason by his full name when she picked Ruby up after the lesson. As soon as she saw him, her face reddened with embarrassment as she remembered the kisses they'd shared at his flat and he'd winked sexily at her when the kids had gone to get their coats and they were alone together in the classroom.

Jess's mum Maggie, had immediately offered to have Ruby to stay overnight when she mentioned that she was going out on a date. Her mum liked her sleep and it was easier to have Ruby there in case they were late home. She'd eventually decided to tell her mum that her date was with Jason. She was really close to her mum and it didn't feel right to keep quiet. Besides, she had a feeling Ruby would let slip that they'd stayed overnight at Jason's flat. Her mum was really pleased that at long last she was going on a date with someone, as she did worry that Jess had never shown much of an interest in having another man in her life since splitting with Steve.

Jess dropped Ruby off at 5pm on the Saturday night and then drove back home to have a bit of a pamper session, so she looked as nice as she could for their night out. Jason had messaged her that morning to say he would pick her up at 6.30pm and to ask for her address. Jess sent it over to him, thinking he wouldn't be too impressed with her tiny Crumpsall house. She had a feeling he might even hit his head on the beams in the lounge.

Jason was looking forward to spending an evening in Jess's company. He'd thought about her on and off all week and liked the fact that she'd made it pretty obvious that just because he'd been famous, it didn't mean she was just going to fall into bed with him. He'd not really dated anyone much since leaving the band and when he had been famous he hadn't needed to really work hard when it came to women, as they pretty much fell at his feet. It was going to make a refreshing change to take a woman out on a date and a woman who didn't give a shit how rich or famous he'd been in the past.

Jess had no idea what to wear. Jason had said he was taking her to Asha's an Indian restaurant in the Deansgate area. It looked pretty swish and she didn't own many smart outfits. In the end she decided on a navy blue dress she'd worn to her work's Christmas party from Coast a couple of months before. The skirt was pleated and ended mid calf and had a lace bodice with a delicate ribbon bow at the back. She hoped it wasn't too posh, but had a feeling that jeans wouldn't be smart enough. Jumping in the shower she washed her hair and shaved her legs and under her arms. Even though she was sure nothing would come from their date, she thought she'd better make a bit of an effort, given the stunning women Jason had dated in the past. Out of curiosity, she'd googled him in his Take That days and noticed he'd dated some stunning women. All were raven haired and rail thin and the polar opposite to her with her curves, boobs and long red hair. She'd never forgotten Steve's disparaging remarks that she wasn't sexy the night he'd walked out and wondered again why he seemed interested in her.

Jess was ready for 6.30pm. She'd found the navy blue satin heels which went with the dress languishing at the bottom of her wardrobe. Brushing them with her fingertips, she flicked the dust off them before fastening a pair of sapphire and diamond earrings into her earlobes as she slid her feet into the heels. She'd managed to tame her curls into something resembling waves with the help of her curling wand and had to admit she didn't look too bad at all.

The doorbell rang and Jess's stomach flipped with nerves as she checked her make up looked ok in the mirror as she walked to the front door and opened it to let Jason in.

For a moment Jason simply stood staring at her in shock. 'Woah Jess. You look amazing!' he said, his eyes nearly falling out of his head. He stepped inside the hallway in a puff of freezing cold air. 'You look beautiful,' he dropped a kiss politely in her cheek. 'Mmm, nice perfume. What is it?'

'Gucci Bloom,' Jess replied, reaching up and taking her thick winter coat from the coat hook. Jason took it from her hands and held it out for her to put her arms in. Jess smiled a shy smile at him, thinking he had nice manners. She locked up and followed him out to the car. 'Beautiful car...' she murmered, running her eyes over the cream leather seats as he opened the car door and she sat down inside.

'One of my first presents to myself when we started to earn decent money in the nineties. I'd always wanted a vintage Merc and now I can't bear to part with it,' he cast his eyes over his car dashboard proudly, as if the car were a baby as he pulled out of the parking space.

'A lot nicer than the crappy car I have.' Jess laughed, thinking she'd love to have a car like this - not that it was practical with Ruby.

They made small talk all the way there until they reached the NCP car park near the restaurant. As Jason locked the car, Jess retrieved her gloves from her handbag. The snow from the previous weekend had disappeared, but the cold was still biting. Walking away from the car, Jason held out his hand to take hers. 'Just in case you trip,' he grinned as he pretended that was the only reason he wanted to hold her hand. 

Sitting down at the table in the restaurant, Jason grinned at her again. He really couldn't believe this was the same Jess who had spent most of the weekend at his flat. He'd thought she was pretty then - even with no make up and her hair in a ponytail. Tonight she looked amazing.

The waiter handed them both a menu and walked away. 'Why are you grinning at me like that?' Jess asked, wondering whether her hair had started to go frizzy in the damp, cold weather.

'You scrub up well. Jess, I almost didn't recognise you.'

'I don't know whether to take that as an insult or a compliment,' Jess laughed softly. 'You don't look so bad yourself.' He looked like he'd had a haircut and had just the faintest hint of stubble. He was wearing dark grey smart trousers, a black long sleeved top with a waistcoat over the top. The choice of a long sleeved top rather than a shirt made his outfit look less formal, but still smart. He gazed unflinchingly at her, his deep blue eyes twinkling at her from behind the glasses he'd put on to read the menu. He really was bloody handsome, she thought to herself and wondered what he saw in her - a mum of one who wore jeans most of the time.

'Definitely a compliment. He took hold of her hand, his fingertips stroking the top of her hands. 'You look beautiful,' he saw the look of doubt cross her face as he said the words. 

'Thank you,' she swallowed nervously and looked down, picking up the menu. She felt lost in his eyes and needed to compose herself. It was no wonder the mums at school went into raptures over him. He had an uncanny knack of making you feel like the only person in the world when he spoke to you.

They eventually decided on their meals and the waiter took their menus away. 'So, where's Ruby tonight?' Jason asked, taking a sip of his non alcoholic beer and settling back comfortably in his seat.

'She's at my mum's house for a sleepover. Mum goes to bed quite early and she thought if we were late home she would rather have Ruby to stay over. Besides, Ruby loves sleeping over. My sister Danni is going over for dinner with my niece Daisy, so Ruby was all excited.' Jess took a sip of her Prosecco, her face softening as she talked about her daughter.

'Ah yeah, I know Daisy. She's in the year above, isn't she?' Jason asked, vaguely remembering one of the teachers mentioning that Ruby and Daisy were cousins.

'Yeah. She's a good kid and her and Daisy adore each other. That's the good thing about me and Steve splitting up - I moved up here and she sees my mum, her cousin and Aunty Danni a lot more now.

Their starters arrived and Jason took a bite of his samosa. 'Did you manage to get hold of Steve about your child maintenance?'

Jess shook her head sadly as she cut her own samosa. 'No. If you could let me have that solicitor's name that you said Gary used. I'd really appreciate it. I'm still debating whether to put the feelers out to see whether Steve actually wants to still have custody.'

'Well I guess asking the question can't do any harm. If he's really not bothered and it's actually harming Ruby's mental health to visit him and you can manage without his child maintenance, then it's worth considering I suppose.'

'I think I might have to see if I can work an extra day and that should cover the maintenance.' Jess remarked, thinking out loud to herself. She didn't really want to work three days rather than two, but it might be a solution. 

The waiter came over and took their starters away. 'So, what do you do with your spare time?' Jason asked her, taking a sip of his drink and looking directly at her. He had to admit that Jess was nothing like his previous dates. For a start none of them had a child, but he wanted to get to know Jess's likes and dislikes and what made her tick. When he was in the band it was purely physical and to satisfy a need that he dated women. He hadn't met anyone during that time where he really wanted to get to know them on a personal level as well.

'To be honest a lot of my time is taken up with working or looking after Ruby. I don't have a lot of spare time. But I do Pilates and I go to the gym when I can,' she didn't tell him that the reason she kept fit was because Steve had really hurt her when he said he was no longer attracted to her the day he walked out. 'How about you?' she topped up her Prosecco from the bottle which the waiter had left in an ice bucket next to them both. 

'I work full time now. But I go to the gym too. I cycle everywhere to keep fit. And I do yoga once or twice or week if I can. I've been to Thailand a few times since I left the band on Yoga retreats. There's nothing like completely getting away from it all.' he trailed off, as he thought back to his idyllic holidays.

'Sounds lovely....' Jess acknowledged, thinking it sounded like heaven. The closest she'd got to that was an All inclusive when her and Steve were still together in Torremolinos and she'd done a yoga class. She could bet that would be Jason's idea of hell, hanging out with a load of hung over British people. It had been her idea of hell too, but she'd put up with it in an attempt to hold their marriage together.

Their main meals arrived and the waiter put their dishes in the middle of the table in case they wanted to share. 'So why did you leave the band and take up teaching?' she asked, completely confused as to why he would leave a millionaire lifestyle to teach a group of 7 and 8 year old children like her own daughter. He'd already spoken about it a bit back at the flat when they stayed there and she wanted to know more.

Do you want the truth or what I think you want to hear?'

'The truth of course!' Jess replied, taking a small portion of the chicken balti and handing the dish to Jason to take some.

'Well, three reasons really. If I was still in the band we'd have already been disturbed by someone wanting a photo while we ate. Even if I said no. I had no privacy whatsoever- in fact, this date would have been front page news if I'd still been in the band. And the second. Well I actually wanted to meet someone special and that was never going to happen while I was in the juggernaut of Take That and thirdly I'd just had enough of the never ending merry-go-round of writing, recording, promoting and then planning a concert. I just wanted a quiet, uncomplicated life. Pure and simple'

Jess looked at him feeling slightly confused. 'But Mark and Howard have partners. It can't be that difficult to find someone special amongst all those women throwing themselves at you?'

'It is when you're not so good at spotting gold-diggers. They were very lucky. I just couldn't find that special someone and in the end it was a decision between carrying on as I was and maybe never meeting that special someone, or giving it up and maybe meeting them. Do you get what I mean?'

Jess nodded slowly, understanding exactly what he meant. 'So where do I fit into all this? I guess I'm a practice run am I?'

'Sorry Jess, what do you mean by that?' Jason's nose wrinkled in confusion.

'Well, you know...Take me out for a date and then move onto someone more glam? Practice your flirting skills and then find someone without a kid?'

Jason looked at her, completely aghast at what she was thinking. 'Is that what you think? That I asked you on a date when I wasn't really interested in you? Jess, you're the first person I've asked out in goodness knows how long. The fact that you have Ruby doesn't bother me in the slightest. I actually asked you out because I like you - I'm attracted to you.'

Jess turned beetroot red at his words and continued eating while she thought through what he'd said. To find a man who didn't mind she had a child was a rarity in itself and to have him say that he found her attractive was a lovely novelty. She couldn't remember any man ever saying that to her apart from Steve when they'd first got together and even then she suspected it was to get in her knickers.

Jason pushed his plate away and rubbed his stomach contentedly. 'That's the other good thing about leaving the band. I can go out for a decent meal and not have to worry that I've got to do break-dancing the following day.'

'I didn't know you can break-dance!' Jess chuckled lightly, thinking how hot he probably looked when he danced and feeling like she might have to fan herself down at the thought of it.

'Ah, there's a lot you don't know about me,' Jason tapped his nose secretively, knowing the profound effect his break-dancing had on women. It was always a joke between him and Howard that it made them scream loudly. 

'I think I might have to watch you break-dancing. I take it I need to find a video from the nineties do I?'

'Um no. Howard and me did a routine at our Progress concerts in 2011. You'll have more luck finding those on Youtube I suspect.' Jason blushed and looked at her from under his eyelashes.'

'Really? That's not long ago at all!' Jess replied, thinking that his fitness levels would put hers to shame. 'I do recall hearing how many people you played to. Everyone was talking about it at the time. Surely you don't need to ever work again?'

'I don't teach for the money, Jess. I do it because I want to. I love that I'm making a difference to peoples lives and hopefully helping a new generation.' He was interrupted by the waiter taking their plates and asking if they wanted anything else. 'Do you want desert or shall we go somewhere else and have some drinks?' he asked her, hoping she didn't want to go home already.

'As I don't have Ruby tonight it would be lovely to go somewhere else. It's not that late is it?'

Jason shook his head. 'I'd really like to go somewhere else too,' he agreed as he handed the waiter his credit card to pay the bill. 'No, my treat Jess!' he waved her away as she attempted to give him her half of the money. He knew money was tight and there was no way he would take money from her - especially since the meal had been expensive. 'You can buy the first drink,' he assured her, taking hold of her hand in his as they made their way out of the restaurant.


	18. Chapter 18

What do you fancy to drink?' Jason slid a glance across at Jess as they stood in the street outside the restaurant.

'A cocktail would be nice? Do you know somewhere? I'm not familiar with this part of Manchester.'

'20 Stories,' Jason suggested, thinking the view would be amazing. 'They do fantastic cocktails and you can see pretty much all of Manchester from there. Does that sound ok?' he put his hand up to her upper arm, moving her out of the way as a group of girls obviously out for a Hen weekend tottered drunkenly past. He saw the unmistakable widening of the bride to be's eyes as she recognised him and dug the girl next to her in the ribs, squeaking loudly the words "Jason who was in Take That!" Taking hold of Jess's hand tightly in his, he pulled her under the archway out of the way of their prying eyes and into his arms. 

Jess looked up at him in the dim light as his arm pulled her tighter against him almost as if they were going to dance the Tango. She could just make out the glint of his teeth from the streetlight across the road, as he grinned down at her. 'So if I'm not a practice run are you going to kiss me, Jason?' she whispered, reaching up and running her fingertips over his stubble. 

Jason tipped his head slightly to one side as if he was thinking about it. 'Do you want me to?'

Jess looked up at him shyly and nodded, flattening her hand against the plane of his cheek. The faint tang of his aftershave assaulted her senses as he tipped her chin up with his fore-finger and kissed her gently on the lips. The arm around her waist anchored her close, as the fingers from his other hand brushed over the lace at the back of her dress and tangled through her hair, before settling to cradle her neck. Jess yielded herself to the dizzying sensation of her lips parting and his tongue grazing against hers as their kiss deepened and her legs turned to jelly. It was almost instinctive to wrap her arms around him underneath his thick, woollen coat which he hadn't done up and trail her fingertips along the fabric at the back of his waistcoat. She didn't want it to end as his long fingers played with the strands of hair at the back of her neck.

Jason pulled away from her with regret and dropped one last kiss onto her soft lips. 'Come on. It's getting cold and I promised you a cocktail, didn't I?'

'You did.' Jess responded, feeling almost disappointed that he'd stopped kissing her. She slipped her hand in his as they came out of their secret hiding place to walk to where Jason had suggested.

'You're ok with going for a drink? We can go back to my place for a drink or I can take you home if you'd rather?'

'No, I'd like to go for a drink first.' Bella replied, her heartbeat at long last feeling like it was returning back to normal. 'If I haven't got Ruby tonight, it seems a shame not to make the most of it.'

The bar was busy when they arrived. Jess looked around her, taking in the glass ceiling and the the vista of Manchester's lights stretching as far as the eye could see. It was a stunning location and she felt slightly disconcerted as it was so far out of her comfort zone. 

'Let's find ourselves a seat and then I'll go get the drinks if there are no waiters around.' Jason suggested, his hand resting on her back as they both looked for somewhere to sit. A waiter appeared suddenly, recognising Jason as he'd been in there a couple of months ago with his brother and sister. He was a fairly well known face in the area and it was common knowledge that he had a flat nearby and since leaving the band had kept a very low profile. Gesturing with his head, he told them to follow him, calling over his shoulder that there was a table he was just about to clear across the room.

'Is this ok, Jess?' Jason asked, taking her coat from her and handing both of them to the waiter for safe-keeping as they reached the table which was set in a quieter corner of the room.

Jess nodded, her eyes on stalks as she took in the impressive huge room with its glass floor to ceiling windows and glass roof. Sitting down, she flicked her eyes over the cocktail menu and wondered where to even start - there were so many to choose from.

'The Manchester Tart is nice if you like raspberries. Jackie tells me they're the best cocktail they do here,' Jason suggested, sitting down opposite her.

'Ok. I'll go with your suggestion.' Jess replied, tucking her hair behind her ear. She could feel that it was beginning to coil back into it's usual curls which had a mind of their own.

Jason ordered her cocktail and a non alcoholic beer for himself, before settling back into the seat and looking straight at her as he tried to gauge whether she was feeling intimidated or impressed by the huge, noisy bar. 'What do you think?' he asked her loudly as he talked over the buzz of the room, anxious that she felt comfortable.

Jess looked slowly around the room again, before her eyes settled back on him. 'It's really impressive. Beautiful. Noisy!' she tried desperately to tear her eyes away from him as he sat with his legs stretched out in front of him, the fabric of his trousers stretched taut across his thighs. It was doing some very funny things to her indeed. She couldn't remember the last time a man had this kind of effect on her.

'Are you ok with being here?' Jason asked, thinking maybe he should have taken her somewhere a bit more intimate. It wasn't going to be particularly easy to chat with all the noise going on.

Jess waved away his concerns. 'Yes of course. You could always come and sit here next to me on the sofa instead of across the table and then we can hear each other better,' she moved across to make room for him, thinking she wouldn't have to look back at him and try to hide the filthy thoughts going through her mind if he sat down next to her.

Jason sat down next to her, his arm settled along the back of sofa and his fingertips trailed onto her shoulder. 'Have you got enough room?'

Nodding, Jess settled into the crook of his shoulder and arm, thinking yet again that he smelt amazing. Her head rested against his shoulder as she settled comfortably against him. 'I'm having a fantastic time. Thank you.' 

The waiter appeared a moment later and discreetly put their drinks on the table, before disappearing off again and leaving the two of them alone again.

Jason tipped Jess's chin up to look at him and dropped a kiss on her upturned lips. 'I'm having a fantastic time too, Jess.' 

Jess sat up and took a sip of her cocktail. 'Mmm, you were right. This is seriously good!' she remarked, savouring the clever combination of sprits. She had a funny feeling that it wouldn't take many of these drinks to be pleasantly drunk.

Relaxing back into the sofa, Jason absent-mindedly stroked her shoulder with his fingers. 'So, does Ruby know we're out together tonight?'

'Yes, she was pretty cool about it. She really likes you, Jay.'

'And I like her. She's a good kid and a real credit to you. It can't have been easy for you, Jess.' He suddenly grinned mischievously at her, before continuing. 'It was dead funny when she told Jackie you liked me.'

'Oh god, yeah. I wanted the ground to swallow me up. There's no chance of me trying to keep you guessing with "little miss fog-horn", is there?'

Jason cocked his head to one side in amusement at her choice of words. 'You wanted to keep me guessing did you?'

Taking a fortifying sip of her cocktail, Jess blushed as she tried to work out what to say. 'Well, not to keep you guessing as such. I'm not entirely sure what you think of me, so I don't want to put all my cards on the table and look a fool. I don't want to get hurt and I certainly don't want Ruby confused.'

'Well, the fact that you're my first proper date in god knows how long doesn't give you some kind of indication that I actually like you?' he said softly, trying to understand her way of thinking. 'I think you look beautiful tonight and I'd really like to spend more time with you.' 

'Really? Jess's heart lifted to hear he wanted to see her again. She was really enjoying spending time with him and the more she got to know him, the more she liked him.

'Really,' he flashed a reassuring grin at her over the top of his beer glass. 'When are you free next?'

Jess's heart skipped a beat at the thought of seeing him again, but the added complication of Ruby wasn't going to make things particularly easy, she realised. 

Jason's eyes narrowed slightly as he saw Jess's almost imperceptible hesitation and realised immediately she was thinking about Ruby. 'If you're worried about Ruby how about we maybe go to the cinema and then you could come back to mine for dinner? Does Sunday afternoon work for you?'

'That would be great!' Jess replied, thinking he must be psychic. The way he seemed to be able to work out her innermost thoughts was slightly disconcerting, but pleasant all at the same time.

'Ok. So it's a date.' Jason said decisively. It didn't worry him in the least having Ruby with them and knew that if he wanted to take things to the next level with Jess that Ruby's happiness and trust would be the most important thing. 'You and Ruby take a look at what you'd like to see and message me and I'll come to collect you'. 

An hour later Jess yawned discreetly. She was feeling warm and fuzzy from her two cocktails and knew if she drank any more she would be nursing a horrendous hangover as she'd already drunk three glasses of Prosecco in the restaurant. 

'It's after midnight, Cinderella. Shall I get you home?' Jason laughed softly, guessing Jess didn't stay up late very often and also didn't drink a huge amount.

'If that's ok with you?' she rummaged around in her handbag to pay for their drinks as she asked the question.

Jason nodded and indicated for her to stay seated while he paid the bill for the drinks and got their coats. He was back a few moments later, waving away her offers to pay for their drinks. 'I promise I'll let you pay for the cinema tickets,' he assured her and held out a steadying hand as she stood up. 

Drawing up outside her house half an hour later, Jess wasn't sure whether to invite Jason in. Would he think coffee meant an invitation that she wanted to sleep with him? Would he be horrified at how tiny her cosy little house was? Questions whirled through her mind as she debated whether to ask him in or not.

Jason switched off the ignition and looked at her. She'd suddenly gone very quiet, he noticed. 'Jess, is everything ok?'

'Um, do you want to come in? I mean for a coffee or a tea of course. Not to sleep with me. Definitely not to sleep with me. I mean, I really fancy you and all that but I don't want to sleep with you.' Jess turned beetroot red and thanked god that that it was dark in the car. ' Oh god! I don't know why I said that!' She was mortified that all her innermost thoughts had come tumbling out without thinking.

Jason stifled a laugh, thinking that was why she had gone quiet on him. She'd obviously been debating asking him in and was worried he'd get the wrong idea. 'Yeah, a coffee would be nice.'

'You won't judge me when you see my tiny house?'

Jason sighed a deep sigh, thinking she must think him shallow if he was bothered about her house. 'Jess, trust me. I grew up in a council house in Wythenshawe. It can't be worse than that!' He leant across and took her hand in his, squeezing it ever so slightly. 'I really don't give a shit, Jess. I asked you out on a date - not to inspect your house!'

Jess gave him a tiny smile and picked up her bag to retrieve her house keys. 'Ok, coffee it is.....'

Following Jess into the kitchen, Jason cast a discreet glance around. It was small, and he had to dip his head slightly due to the beam in the kitchen, but it was immaculately tidy and homely. By the smell in the kitchen, unless he was mistaken, she'd been baking with Ruby that afternoon. 

'Shall we go in the lounge?' she asked, handing him his steaming cup of de-caff coffee and taking his hand in hers to lead the way. 

Sitting down on the sofa, Jason put his coffee down on the coffee table and drew her body in his arms to kiss her as she put her coffee cup down next to his. 'So, we've ascertained you don't want to sleep with me. So I know where I stand at least. Friend-zoned on our first date eh?' he joked, pretending to be extremely hurt. It was years since he'd had to chase a woman and he was actually enjoying the thrill of the chase. When he was in the band he could have his pick of pretty much any woman and it made a refreshing change to meet Jess and take her out.

'I can't believe I said that!' Jess put her face in her hands as he teased her gently. 'I bet you've never had somebody say that to you before - that they don't want you.'

'Um, not when I was in the band.' Jason had the good grace to look embarrassed as he admitted it. 'Things are different when you're just an ordinary man though. I've not really dated anyone much since I left.' He looked at her directly, thinking he'd never felt so unsure of himself with woman. 'Jess, I know you're worried about getting hurt, but I have no intention of hurting you or playing with your feelings. I really like you and I'm happy to give you all the time you need.'

Jess looked at him and realised he meant it. 'I really like you too, Jay. I'm just scared.'

'What are you scared about?'

'Oh god, where do I start Jay?' she took a breath to gather her thoughts together. 'It's just all so stupid.'

'Not if it's worrying you it's not. Tell me.'

'All my baggage..... an ex husband, a kid, a normal job. The thought of you being disappointed when I get undressed. My inexperience. My age. The thought that underneath this dress I don't have a banging body, as you put it the other day - I worry you'll compare me to your previous girlfriends, partners and even the dancers on your tour!' 

Jason sat back and folded his arms as he studied her. 'Have you finished? Or is there more?'

Jess shook her head, feeling deflated as she thought she'd well and truly blown it now she'd let rip with all her innermost thoughts and fears.

'Do you want to know what I think about all your worries?' he folded her into his arms so he could feel the thud-thud of her heart against his chest. He felt her tiny nod as she lay in his arms. 'Jess, look at me.' He tipped her head up to look at him and kissed her gently on the lips. 'I don't care about any of it. To me you're beautiful and that's all that matters. I don't care that you have an ex or that he's the only person you've ever been with and it doesn't bother me that you have Ruby. All that matters is me and you and I know if and when you're ready I'll be anything but disappointed.' He looked down at her and kissed her long and hard. 'Now do you believe me?'

'Yes,' Jess whispered, her fingers raking softly at his hair as she returned his kiss, feeling relief that she had nothing to worry about.


	19. Chapter 19

Jess woke up early on the Sunday morning. She had meant to have a lie in as Ruby was staying at her mum's, but she was so used to waking up early when Ruby was around that she now found it impossible to lie in past 8am. She lay in bed, thinking about the fantastic evening she'd spent the night before with Jason. He hadn't left until 2am and they had sat talking and kissing and she hadn't wanted the night to end. Running her fingertips over her lips, she recalled how amazing her kisses had made her feel and couldn't wait to see him again.

Jason had already been for a run and was eating a bowl of muesli by the time Jess woke up. He sent Jess a quick message to say thank you for a lovely evening and that he was looking forward to taking her and Ruby out the following weekend to the cinema. After the evening they had spent together he was thinking that he should maybe mention to the head-teacher about him and Jess.

Jess picked up her phone once she was dressed to check if her mum had messaged and was pleasantly surprised to see a message from Jason. She rapidly replied thanking him for a fantastic night and said she'd message him back with the film and time which Ruby had chosen once she had spoken to her.

Half an hour later, as she was eating breakfast the doorbell rang and there was the sound of a key in the lock as Jess's mum Maggie let herself in, closely followed by Ruby. 'Hi Jess!!!' her voice wavered through the house as she walked into the hallway.

'In here, mum!' Jess called out, as Ruby came hurtling into the kitchen and threw her arms around her.

'How are you?' Maggie asked, giving Jess a hug once Ruby had stopped excitedly hugging her.

'I'm good, mum,' Jess replied, returning the hug and turning back to the kettle to make a cup of coffee for her mum. 'Do you want one?'

Maggie nodded and sat down at the breakfast bar as Jess busied herself making a coffee for her. 'So how did last night go?' she asked, noticing that Jess looked extremely happy.

'It was fantastic, mum. We went to a lovely Indian restaurant and then he took me for cocktails at this trendy bar overlooking Manchester. It was just amazing.... ' she trailed off, as she recalled the previous night, a soft smile crossing her face as she thought back to it. She handed her mum the coffee mug and turned to look at Ruby. 'Did you have a good evening, Ruby?' 

'Yes mummy.' Ruby replied, handing Jess her rucksack containing her pyjamas and previous days' clothing. 'Daisy and Danni came over for dinner and we played games all evening. It was great!' she replied excitedly. 'Can I have a glass of milk?'

Jess nodded and poured her a glass of milk, before sitting back at the breakfast bar to finish eating her Frosted Wheats.'

'Are you seeing him again?' Maggie asked, thinking Jason being Ruby's teacher could throw a spanner in the works.

'He asked if me and Ruby would like to go to the cinema. Would you like that Ruby? Jason said you can choose which film,' she looked at Ruby to check she was happy with the idea.

Ruby nodded excitedly at the thought of spending time at the cinema with Jason and Jess. She disappeared off to look for Jess's IPAD so she could choose a film to go and see.

Maggie used the time whilst Ruby was searching out the IPAD to ask Jess a few questions; 'So what's he like, Jess?' she had to admit to herself that she'd been extremely surprised to hear Jess was going on a date with Ruby's teacher and even more surprised that Jess had admitted that the "friend's house" she'd stayed at the previous weekend was in fact Jason's flat. 

'He's a real gentleman, mum. I really like him. And oh my goodness, he is SO handsome!'

'And has he mentioned to the head-teacher that you're seeing each other?' Maggie asked, wondering whether it was even allowed and how it would look if he was a Ruby's teacher.

'Not at the moment. I guess if things become more serious then he'll have to maybe let the head-teacher know. I'm not the usual type he goes for, so I really can't see it going much further. Once he sees how mundane my life is he'll soon get bored,' she laughed as she tried to cover up that she would be disappointed if he did get bored. 

'Well if he gave up his starry life and all that comes with it maybe he just wants a quiet, normal life. Have you thought about that?' her mum took a sip of her coffee and looked directly at Jess. 

'Yeah, maybe...' Jess said non-commitally, as she took a sip of her coffee, thinking he could still have a mundane life if that's what he wanted, but with someone a bit more glam than her - and without a child too.

'Can you handle it if the other parents find out? You may get some nasty comments, Jess,' Maggie changed the subject as she admitted to Jess the main thing that had crossed her mind when Jess had told her that she was going on a date with Jason. It hadn't escaped her how the women behaved where he was concerned. He may not be famous anymore, but a lot of the mums still were star-struck around him and she knew Jess would get some sarcastic comments. 

'I really don't think it will go that far, mum. One date with Ruby involved and he'll run a mile. Much as I love Ruby and think she's a great kid, it's not much fun for someone who doesn't have a child to take her on a date too.'

Maggie looked speculatively at Jess, thinking he seemed keen. She had a feeling Jess was wrong, because if Jason hadn't been keen he wouldn't have even suggested in the first place taking Jess and Ruby to the cinema. In fact, he probably wouldn't even have asked her on a date the previous night if he wasn't interested in her. Everyone knew he swerved out of the way of any advances some of the single mums in the playground had made towards him.

The following day Jess was fifteen minutes late picking Ruby up after her guitar lesson. 'I'm so sorry I'm late Mr Orange!' she rushed into the room and shot him an apologetic glance. 'The traffic was atrocious on the way home from work!'

'Jess, it's fine! I wasn't about to go off home and leave her here alone. I wouldn't do that to you Ruby, would I?' he chuckled softly and raised his eyebrow at Jess. 'And no one else is here, so call me Jason.'

Jess flushed with embarrassment. It felt so strange being in an environment where she had to be careful what she called him. She ducked down to give Ruby a hug as Ruby left Jason's side - they had been chatting about the film she wanted to go and see once all the other children had left. 'Ruby do you want to go and get your things together?' she asked her, letting go of her so she could get her things.

'I hear we're going to see Sherlock Gnomes?' Jason grinned wryly as they stood alone in the classroom. 

'I'm afraid so.' Jess replied, thinking he must surely by now be regretting the offer to take them to the cinema. 'You still have time to back out.' she offered, hoping he wouldn't take her up on the offer.

Jason stepped forward so he could look her directly in the eye. 'Jess, I wouldn't have asked you if I didn't want to go. I'm really looking forward to spending time with you both.' 

Jess raised her eyes to his as he said the words and smiled at him. 'That's good. Because I want to spend more time with you. I had an amazing time the other night.'

'Me too, Jess.' He lifted his hand unthinkingly and stroked her cheek with his fingers, immediately dropping his hand from her almost like he'd been burnt as Ruby walked back in the room.

Jess stepped back and fixed Ruby with a grin as she walked towards her with her rucksack in her hand, her heart banging in her chest at the touch of his hand. 'Do you have plans for dinner tonight?'

Jason shook his head. 'Apart from a stir fry for one and a visit to the gym, no I haven't.'

'Would you like dinner with us?' Jess asked shyly. She was sure he would say no to dinner in her miniscule house. 'It's nothing exotic I'm afraid - Spaghetti with pesto sauce. But a home-made one.'

It didn't take Jason long to make up his mind. Spaghetti with Jess and Ruby sounded a lot more fun than Stir fry for one and the gym. 'I'd really like that, Jess. I can go to the gym tomorrow. Is it ok if I finish up here and I'll meet you at your house?'

Jess nodded, smiling at Ruby's squeak of excitement that they would be having a guest for dinner. 'I'll see you in a bit then.'

Jason swiftly tidied the guitars away and headed off to see the head-teacher The new head-teacher Mike, had started a couple of months earlier after Mrs Brown left and Jason got on extremely well with him. They were similar ages and had struck up an easy friendship and even been out for runs together. He saw the door to his office was open, so knocked and stuck his head around the opening. 'Hi Mike, do you have 5 minutes?'

Mike turned around from his laptop where he was writing a draft letter to the parents about term dates and the end of year disco. 'Yeah, sure Jay. Come in. How's things?'

Jason suddenly felt nervous as he wondered what kind of reaction he was going to get to his piece of news. He sat down opposite Mike and leant forward, his forearms resting on his knees as he looked at his boss. He couldn't remember the last time he'd had to ask for permission to date someone. He reckoned the last time was when he was a teenager when the band first formed and he had asked their manager Keith if they were allowed to date. He'd been told to keep it quiet, so it didn't upset the fans. 'Yeah good Mike, but I need to have a word about something.'

Mike looked at Jason, hoping he wasn't there to hand in his notice and go back to the band. He was a good teacher and popular with the kids, parents and fellow teachers. 'Yes. Everything ok?'

'Um, yes.' He hesitated as he tried to work out what exactly to say. 'Ruby Shaw in my class...'

'What about her?'

'Well, um.... her mum. She's invited me over for dinner.'

Mike's eyebrows shot up in surprise. 'Well, I wasn't expecting that! Is that to thank you for the guitar lessons?'

'Sort of... I asked her out on a date Saturday night. We went out for dinner. Mike I know this isn't really the done thing, but I really like her. I just felt I needed to tell you as this maybe makes things difficult with Ruby being in my class?'

Mike sat back and digested what Jason had just told him. It wasn't a scenario he'd ever dealt with before. 'So how serious is it?'

Jason massaged his temples and took a deep breath while he worked out how serious their relationship was. 'Nothing serious at the moment. I'm taking her and Ruby out to the cinema on Sunday and we did kiss on Saturday night,' he was starting to wish he'd kept his mouth shut as he saw Mike's slightly incredulous expression.

'Well you have good taste. I'll give you that, Jay. She's very striking with that red hair. Do you want me to have Ruby moved into another class?'

Jason shook his head vehemently. 'No definitely not! If she's allowed to stay I don't want her uprooted. She's very happy in my class and has friends in there. It would be like punishing her for something that's not her fault. Besides, she'll be moving classes in three months anyway.'

'Well the only thing you need to worry about is if it gets out. I'm happy for you to continue seeing each other as long as it doesn't affect Ruby and you can deal with it if it gets out?'

Jason nodded. 'I've dealt with a lot of crap from the paparazzi. I'm sure it will be fine. I can handle it. And I promise not to treat Ruby any differently than the other kids - even if I am seeing her mum.'

Mike nodded and smiled supportively at Jason. 'Ok. Thanks for coming to warn me. I appreciate it and I'm glad if she makes you happy.'

Twenty minutes later Jess heard the doorbell ring and hurried to the door. 'Hi. I was thinking you got lost! Come in. Dinner won't be long.'

Jason followed her into the kitchen and smelt appreciatively. 'Something smells nice.'

'Dinner will be around twenty minutes. Do you want a glass of red wine? There's a bottle over there if you want a glass?' she nodded her head towards the worktop by the fridge. 'Glasses are in the cupboard above.'

Jason poured a glass for them both and sauntered over to her with both glasses, putting them down next to where she stood stirring the sauce. 'I told Mike, the head-teacher about us tonight.'

Jess swung around in surprise, a shocked expression on her face. 'Oh? What did he say?'

Jason folded her into his arms and pulled her gently towards him. 'He's cool with it. As Ruby moves up to another class in three months it's fine. I've promised to treat her no differently. We just have to be prepared that there may be a backlash from parents if they find out. I can handle that. But can you?' 

'Yes.' Jess said simply. It meant a lot to hear him say what he had. He'd put his job on the line by speaking to the head so soon and she realised he must be quite keen on her to do that. She reached up and put her arms around his neck as their lips met in a long kiss.


	20. Chapter 20

The rest of the week passed quickly for both Jason and Jess. Jason had just messaged Jess to say he would pick her and Ruby up on the Sunday at 1.30pm, when his phone buzzed with a message from Gary asking if he fancied going out for a few drinks on the Friday evening. He replied immediately, thinking it would be great to meet up and catch up as well as hearing how the rest of the lads were doing.

On the Friday night Jason arranged to meet Gary at Tribeca in Central Manchester. He knew it was somewhere they probably wouldn't get spotted as the low lighting meant they wouldn't be noticed too easily. As he arrived at the bar he rapidly looked around and realised Gary wasn't there and so he sat down at the bar and ordered himself a red wine. His thoughts wandered to Jess and he wondered whether she was out that evening. He was sure that she'd mentioned in passing on Monday when he'd been over for dinner that she was going out with her sister Danni and Danni's two friends Meg and Marie. Meg's daughter Maisie and Marie's daughter Florence, were both in his class and were inseparable with Ruby.

Jess was just getting ready to go out when her phone buzzed with a message. Picking the phone up, her heart skipped a beat when she saw it was from Jason saying he was looking forward to seeing them both on Sunday. Knowing Danni and her friends would be there any minute, she simultaneously messaged him a reply whilst sliding her feet into her new chunky heeled ankle boots. She was feeling a bit nervous as they were headed into Manchester for drinks - something which was a bit out of her comfort zone. She had to admit that it was a much needed night out for them all and she hadn't seen Meg and Marie since the first night out they'd had just after Ruby started at the school. They had all got on like a house on fire the first time they had all gone out together, so she was really looking forward to their night out.

Jess finished the message back to Jason with 2 kisses and quickly scrutinised her appearance in the cheval mirror in her bedroom. She had to admit, she was pleased with her reflection. She had found the blue, brown and black checked short skirt in a boutique in the Trafford Centre when she popped in during late night shopping evening. She had teamed it with thick, black tights, a thin fine-knit blue sweater and her ankle boots. At long last her trips to the gym were beginning to pay off, she noticed. The one dress size she'd dropped was now noticeable. The skirt ended three inches above the knee and she could see her legs were looking more toned from the time she'd spent working out.

Jason smiled when he saw Jess's reply an hour or so later as he sat in the bar and took a sip of his red wine. In the periphery of his vision he saw Gary arrive and rapidly look around the room for him. He held his hand up in greeting, knowing that Gary wouldn't hear him call across the room as the music was fairly loud.

'Hi Jay!!!!' Gary threw his arms around Jason in a bear hug as Jason slid off the bar stool to greet him. As they pulled apart he clapped him on the back and grinned. 'How has your week been?'

Jason sat back down on his stool and signalled for the bar steward to order a drink for Gary. 'Red wine or beer, Gaz?'

'I'll have what you're having, Jay.' Gary nodded towards Jason's drink.

'We might as well have a bottle if we're drinking the same,' Jason ordered the wine and turned back to Gary to answer his earlier question. 'Yeah, a good week thanks. The after school guitar lessons seem to be going OK,' he knew instinctively that Gary was really wanting to know whether he'd seen any more of Jess since Sunday.

Gary took a sip of his wine and fixed Jason with a knowing look. 'That's not what I'm asking and you know it! How did it go with the lovely Jess on Sunday and have you seen any more of her?'

Jason took a sip of his wine, playing for time as he knew it would wind Gary up. 'You're a bloody nosey so and so, aren't you?' he chuckled, before replying. 'We spent the day together on Sunday. I took her out for dinner on Saturday and then Jess asked me over for dinner on Monday after Ruby's guitar lesson.'

'Do you like her?' Gary asked, curiosity in his voice as he asked the question. He was amused at Jason being keen on her as she was so different to his usual type of girl.

Jason nodded. 'Yes, I really like her Gaz. I know she's nothing like my usual type, but I want to get to know her better. Actually, the longer I know her the more attractive I find her. When I took her out Saturday night she looked beautiful. I couldn't take my eyes off her.'

'I'm really pleased for you, Jay.' Gary remarked, feeling genuinely pleased for him.

Jason blushed slightly and grinned at Gary. He had a good feeling about where he and Jess were heading.

'Does her having a kid complicate matters though? I know you wanted to meet someone special and settle down, but do you really want to bring up someone else's kid? I'm not trying to piss all over things, but is this what you really want, Jay?' Gary looked at Jason, hoping that Jason wouldn't get all uppity and defensive with his thoughts. 'I get that you like Jess, but do you really want to get tangled up with a divorcee?'

Jason looked thoughtfully over the rim of his wine glass as he considered Gary's question. 'Do you know what? I really don't care. I like Jess and that's all that matters. I enjoy spending time with her and Ruby and I just want to see where this goes.'

Gary looked at Jason, thinking at least Jason was relaxed about where things were going and hoped Jason wouldn't get hurt. His eyes were drawn to four women who had just entered the bar and nodded in their direction. 'Speaking of which.... Unless I'm very much mistaken, isn't that Jess?'

Jason's head swivelled around to see if Gary was right. 'Yes it is,' he murmered, his gaze looking Jess up and down appreciatively . She was wearing a skirt he hadn't seen her wearing before - in fact, apart from Saturday night he realised he had only ever seen her in jeans and he had to admit her legs looked bloody amazing in the skirt she was wearing.

'Are you going to go over and say hello or are you going to just stare at her all night with your tongue hanging out? ' Gary joked, noticing Jason was openly staring at her like he'd never seen her before. He wondered who the other three women were and noticed they were all very attractive too.

'I'll wait and see if she notices us first,' Jason remarked, seeing that she was with her sister Danni and two of her friends. It also hadn't escaped his notice that a group of men in their mid thirties also seemed to have noticed the four women. 

'Did Jess know you were coming here tonight or did she tell you she was coming here?' Gary asked, wondering whether it was co-incidental that they had both ended up in the same bar on the same night.

'No, I think she mentioned she was going out, but she didn't say where to and I didn't say where we were going either - not that it's any of my business. It's not like I've asked her to be my girlfriend.' Jason shrugged nonchalantly as the girls sat down in a booth across the room and began to peruse the drinks menu.

'Ah, but you'd like her to be, judging by your expression when she walked in. You seriously have the hots for her, Jay. You were mentally undressing her, weren't you?' Gary took a sip of his wine and looked at Jason from under his eyebrows.

Jason blushed beetroot red and shook his head. 'I wasn't!' he protested, knowing Gary had hit the nail on the head - he was finding it very hard to tear his eyes away from Jess as he saw her cross her legs and tuck a stray lock of hair behind her ear as she studied the drinks menu.

'You were! See.. you're still eyeing her up now!' Gary laughed knowingly and looked over in the direction of the girls again. He cocked his head to one side and grinned at Jason. 'Seriously, I'm really pleased for you. She's really pretty.'

Jason made a point of tearing his eyes away from Jess and concentrating on Gary. ' So, how are things with you and the lads? Any TV appearances?'

'Saturday Night Takeaway and then a couple of appearances in Ireland the week after. Then we really need to start rehearsals for the next tour. You know you're always welcome back, Jay? Dougie misses you so much. You pair were always so close,' Gary said, feeling the pang still in his heart as he thought about the huge hole Jason had left behind when he left. He knew Jay had absolutely no idea how much it had altered the dynamics of the band. Howard felt he had to over compensate to try and fill the gap somehow, because it had always been him and Jay one side and Gary and Mark on the other. Gary was now especially close to Jay as he'd been there for him when he and Fran had split up, but on-stage it had ALWAYS been Jay and Howard.

Jason heaved a sigh as he felt guilt run through his body again - as it always did when Gary said he'd always be welcome back. 'Gaz, I just can't do it. I'm happy and I'm at peace with my life now. I've found my little niche in life and that's teaching.'

'Please do get in contact with Dougie though. He misses you, Jay. More than you could ever know,' Gary resisted the temptation to grab Jason's hand to try to convince him.

'Ok. I promise. I'll ring him. Is he still DJ-ing?' Jason asked, realising he had no clue as he wasn't on social media. Out of the corner of his eye he saw the group of lads make their way over to Jess and her companions and swallowed down a thread of jealousy which ran through him as Meg patted one of the seats to offer them a seat.

'Yeah, its going really well for him, Jay. He's built up quite a following now. A lot of fans were asking after you the other night on Instagram. He sounded really down when he had to tell them he hadn't seen you. It got me to thinking that you haven't spoken to him recently.

'I will contact him next week. I'm actually considering asking Jess and Ruby to my place in the Lake District at Easter. If he happens to be there too maybe we could meet up? I promise I'll contact him.' Jason poured them both another glass of wine from the bottle and gave him a re-assuring glance, so that Gary knew he'd taken his remarks on-board.

'That sounds like a great idea,' Gary agreed, taking a drink of the wine. 'So how do you feel that Jess is getting chatted up by that bloke over there?' he nodded his head in Jess's direction.

Jason looked back over towards Jess. She was chatting and laughing with one of the men in the party who looked to be in his late thirties with blonde hair. It was noticeable that she hadn't extended an invitation for him to sit next to her like Meg had. 'I don't like it, but its not like I own her or she's my girlfriend.' Jason commented with a rueful smile. Anyway, I need the loo. It doesn't feel right watching her like this. I'll go over and say hello.'

Jess's eyes widened in surprise as she caught sight of Jason crossing the room towards her. Excusing herself from the man she was talking to, she stood up and moved away from the booth to walk across the dancefloor in the middle of the room to meet him. 'Hi Jay. This is a pleasant surprise! What are you doing here?'

'I met Gaz for drinks....' he gestured over to Gary who gave her a small wave in greeting as he saw her turn to search him out in the half light of the bar. He shoved his hands in his jean pockets and looked downwards, feeling slightly embarrassed as he realised by now that not only her sister, but her friends and the group of lads were all openly staring at not only him, but also at Gary too. He raised his eyes to meet hers and gave her a small smile, 'You look gorgeous, Jess.'

'Thank you,' Jess whispered, flushing at his compliment. 

'I take it your sister and friends don't know we've been seeing each other judging by their expressions?' Jason laughed softly, nodding in their direction as Jess stepped forward and put her hands either side of his waist and tilted her lips up to kiss him.

'I hadn't told them.' Jess looked up at him, longing to kiss him again, but not wanting to draw any more attention to the two of them than she had already. 'I thought mum would have told Danni to be honest, but she knows we want to keep this low key so I think she figured I'd say something when I was ready.'

Jason nodded in understanding. 'Me and Gaz can disappear if you'd rather we made ourselves scarce? I'm sure he won't mind. I don't want me being here to put a dampener on your night out. You looked like you had company,' he nodded back over to the table where Danni, Meg and Marie were sitting and still openly ogling the two of them. The group of lads were long forgotten and had moved to the bar to look for other likely candidates to chat up.

'I don't somehow think my sister and friends are interested now that they've seen me and you looking cosy and also spotted Gary over there. Why don't you come and join us?'

'Are you sure?' Jason looked unsure as he asked the question.

'Girls, do you mind if Jay and Gary join us?' Jess wandered back over to the table to ask.

'Of course not! The more the merrier.' Danni replied with a huge grin, thinking all their Christmases had come at once.

'They said yes. Bring Gary over. I promise they won't eat him alive!' Jess joked to Jason, hoping to god that they all behaved and didn't act like a bunch of lovesick teenagers if Gary was going to grace them with his presence.


	21. Chapter 21

The alarm buzzed insistently in Jess's ear. Turning over, she groaned and massaged her temples as she felt her hangover kick in and switched the alarm off, thinking she'd better get up as Danni would be over soon with Ruby. Their mum had looked after both Ruby and Daisy at Danni's house so they could go out together. Her mind wandered back to the previous night and she groaned again as she recalled how much she'd had to drink. She hoped she hadn't made a fool of herself in front of Jason as she didn't remember much of it. Her phone buzzed with a text from Jason:

"How's your head?"

'"Sore :-( Did I make a fool of myself?"

"Only when you did a strip tease in the bar. Ha ha!"

"Oh god, did I really do that???? I don't remember!!!!" she messaged back, panicking that she'd made a complete show of herself.

Jess's phone rang and she immediately pressed the button to pick up. 'Please tell me I didn't do anything like that, Jay!' her face burnt flame red.

'No, I'm only joking! You were pissed and you did ask me back to yours, but I said no. I remembered what you said about not wanting Ruby to meet lots of uncles so I turned you down - not that I wasn't tempted, but I'd rather we were sober if we're going to do anything like that,' he teased, instantly picturing her sat up in bed, dying with a combination of embarrassment and a hangover. 'You were well behaved, apart from propositioning me. Though I have a feeling your sister and friends will be quizzing you about what's going on between us.' Jason laughed softly down the phone.

'Oh god! I'm so sorry!!' Jess felt like she would die of embarrassment.

'Ah, don't worry about it.' Jason laughed gently, before continuing; 'Well they were so busy hanging onto Gary's every word last night. I don't think they noticed much about us two apart from you kissing me when you first saw me. If Gary hadn't been there we would have been the main topic of conversation. The minute they saw him we were forgotten, but I bet Danni will be wanting to know what's going on between us once she's sobered up.' 

'So are we still on for the cinema tomorrow or did I scare you off?' Jess joked, half wondering whether she really had put him off her completely after drunkenly inviting him home. 

'Of course. I'll be over at 1.30. Enjoy your day, Jess.' Jason said softly down the phone.

'And you, Jay. Thanks for checking I was ok,' she replied back, before hanging up and making her way to the bathroom to have a shower.

At 10am the doorbell rang and Jess hurried to the door to let them in. Danni stood on the doorstep looking a lot brighter than Jess felt, as she stood there with Ruby and her own daughter Daisy and a huge grin on her face as she saw Jess's palid complexion. 'Feeling rough?' she asked, her eyebrow raised as Jess held the door open wider to let them in.

Jess followed Danni and the girls into the kitchen as Ruby handed her rucksack containing her soap bag and pyjamas to her. 'Have you time for a coffee, Danni?'

'Of course! I'm not going anywhere until I know what's going on between you and the very delicious Mr O.'

Jess turned away to fill the kettle, using it as an opportunity to play for time as she tried to work out exactly where her and Jason's relationship was up to. She then began to spoon instant coffee into two mugs, before turning and looking at Danni. Part of her wanted to keep their relationship a secret, as she realised she didn't really want to be the topic of conversation in the playground. 'There's not much to tell really, Danni,' she replied as she swivelled around to look at her sister.

'Yeah right! I don't believe that for a second, Jess. 'I know you very well and you don't go around kissing random men - well apart from Steve and I never did get what you saw in him,' Danni remarked, fixing Jess with a stare which indicated that she wasn't going to get away with pretending nothing was going on.

'Um, we've been seeing each other. It's nothing serious though.' Jess turned back and began to pour their coffees. She set them down on the breakfast bar where Danni sat, along with a packet of Custard Cream biscuits.

'So how many dates constitutes "nothing serious"?' Danni gestured the words with her fingers.

'Four.' Jess took a sip of coffee, her eyes sparkling as she looked back at her sister.

'Four!!!! You bloody secretive sod. 'When and where?' her eyes narrowed as she studied her older sister and saw a blush appear on her face. 'I promise I won't tell anyone, if that's what you're worried about.'

'I bumped into him at the park and he invited me back to his flat as the weather was appalling. Me and Ruby ended up spending the night and then stayed the following day too. Then the next time he took me for dinner and we had an amazing time...., then he came back for dinner after Ruby's guitar lesson and then I guess you could call last night a sort of date as we spent the evening chatting while you three were fawning over Gary.'

'So you ended up spending the night together the first time you met?' Danni's eyebrows nearly disappeared as she looked at Jess with incredulity. 'You tart!'

'I didn't! He kindly vacated his bed and me and Ruby slept in it.' Jess shot back sharply.

'Yeah, I believe you. Thousands wouldn't.' Danni remarked, taking a sip of her coffee and opening the biscuit packet. 'So, what's he like? Nobody really knows much about him as he keeps his cards close to his chest. I assume there's no Mrs Orange on the scene?'

Jess shook her head at Danni's question; 'No, there's no Mrs Orange around. He said he hasn't really dated much since leaving the band as he was busy with teacher training and then settling into his new job.' Jess took a sip of her coffee and waved away Danni's offer of the biscuit packet. 'He's really nice. He's really good with Ruby and I can see she really likes him.'

'And you? How do you feel about him?' Danni asked, noticing that Jess hadn't commented about how she felt towards him.

'I like him. He's handsome and interesting to talk to and I look forward to seeing him again. When he kisses me I go weak at the knees,' Jess replied, a small smile playing across her lips as she thought back to the way he made her feel.

'But, there's a but isn't there?' 

'I just don't get what he sees in me?' Jess rested her chin in her hand as she leant on the worktop and thought about him and how she loved spending time with him.

Danni looked at her in surprise. 'Um, where shall I start you silly mare? Jess, you are beautiful and funny and you have this amazingly stunning red hair and green eyes. Considering you've had a kid you have a fantastic figure. You look like shit with a hangover today, but he was looking at you last night like he really fancied you. He couldn't take his eyes off you when you disappeared off to the loo. I was watching him looking at you.'

'But Ruby....'

'What about her?'

'Surely he wants his own kids? Why would he want to date someone with a kid? He may not be famous now, but he's still devastatingly handsome. And that smile... I get lost in his smile.'

Danni shrugged and fixed Jess with a stern stare. 'Maybe he does want his own kids. I probably wouldn't be asking him whether he wants kids right now though - not unless you want to scare him off. But he knows if he dates you then Ruby is part of that package.' 

Jess nodded slowly. 'Yeah, I guess so. He has mentioned me to the head teacher so I suppose he must like me.'

'Well there you go then. What did I say? He does like you - a lot by the sounds of things!' Danni remarked, taking one more biscuit.

''So I take it you enjoyed last night?' Jess winked at Danni, knowing she had spent the whole night chatting to Gary and had got along like a house on fire.

'Yes, we had a great night. Gary is so handsome and funny. I really liked him. Considering he's so famous he's really down to earth.'

'He didn't ask for your phone number then?' Jess teased, knowing that Danni had more than liked him.

'No, he didn't. We just had a laugh.' Danni took a sip of her rapidly cooling coffee. 'Don't change the subject. When are you seeing Jason again?'

'Tomorrow. He's taking me and Ruby to see a film and then we're having a meal at his house.'

'And then staying the night with Ruby in the spare room and you in his bed?' Danni joked, before finishing her coffee and wandering over to put the mug in the dishwasher.

Jess shook her head. 'No, it wouldn't feel right this early on.'

'Right, I'd better make tracks. Have a good day tomorrow.' Danni stood up and hugged Jess, before going off in search of Daisy, who was in Ruby's bedroom.

Opening the front door, Jess hugged Danni. 'Don't worry I won't say anything about your budding romance and neither will Meg and Marie. I'm really pleased for you,' she leant forward and hugged Jess before heading off down the road to her house ten minutes away.

Jason was there the following day a few minutes early. He had to admit he'd never looked forward to seeing a kids film as he was that day. He loved taking his nieces and nephews out, but the fact that he was going to be watching one with Jess was an added bonus.

Jess had been eagerly clock watching all morning and had changed her clothes half a dozen times by the time Jason arrived. By the time she got downstairs Ruby had let him in and was chattering away ten to the dozen about her evening spent with her cousin Daisy. 'Ruby, what have I told you about opening the door without telling me first?' she scolded lightly, before giving Jason a beaming grin.

'But mum, I looked through the curtains and saw it was Jason, so that's ok isn't it?'

'Well that's ok then...' Jess agreed, resisting the urge to go over and kiss Jason.

Jason raised an eyebrow, instantly guessing Jess didn't want to kiss him in front of Ruby. 'No, she guessed I wasn't an axe-murderer when she saw it was me,' he joked and winked at Ruby.

'Well if you were you still have a recognisable face so you'd be found fairly quickly!' Jess laughed softly and raised her eyebrow back at him.

'Well, by everybody apart from you,' Jason retorted, reminding her of the day she'd gone back to his flat and had only realised his famous past once she saw the gold discs there.

'Yes, apart from me.' Jess blushed bright red and turned to look at Ruby so she didn't have to meet his eyes. 'Ruby, do you need the bathroom before we go out?'

Ruby nodded and ran up the stairs to use the bathroom. 'Bring your coat downstairs with you!' Jess called up the stairs, realising Ruby had taken it upstairs with her when she returned home from Danni's house and hadn't brought it back down to hang up.

'Ok mum!' Ruby called back, her voice muffled by the bathroom door.

Stepping towards Jess, Jason hesitated momentarily as he looked down at her, suddenly feeling unsure of himself. 'You look nice, Jess.'

Jess looked up at him and swallowed as she looked into his deep blue eyes. 'Thank you,' she whispered, feeling suddenly shy. 'Are you going to kiss me now we're on our own?' she asked him, feeling mesmerised by his unwavering gaze.

'Do you want me to?' he asked as his arm wound around her waist and pulled her gently towards him until they were pressed up against each other.

'Yes....' her answer was silenced by his lips meeting hers as he kissed her hard, leaving her breathless as the unmistakable sound of Ruby's feet began to pound down the stairs towards them.

'I can't stop thinking about you,' he muttered under his breath to her, so only she could hear him - so quietly that she almost didn't hear his remark.

She looked up at him quizzically as she helped Ruby on with her coat, half wondering if she'd heard him correctly. 

'Yes, you heard me correctly, Jess.' He replied in a low voice, before turning to Ruby and flashing a big grin at her. 'Come on, let's get going before I change my mind and take you to see Spider-Man instead.'


	22. Chapter 22

As Jess sat in the front of the car her mind was in overdrive as she turned over in her head what Jason had said. Had he really said he couldn't stop thinking about her? It made her heart skip a beat at the thought that he'd been thinking of her.

Half an hour later they arrived at the cinema. Ruby had talked ten to the dozen the whole way, hardly pausing for breath. 'I'll collect the tickets,' Jess murmered, making her way over to the bank of ticket machines along one wall. 

'Shall I take Ruby to queue up for a drink or popcorn?' Jason asked Jess, unsure whether she allowed Ruby to have sugary snacks.

Jess looked at Ruby, who was looking back at her with eyes almost pleading with her to be allowed some popcorn. 'Ok. She can have a small popcorn and a bottle of water. I don't want her drinking coke as she'll be bouncing off the walls from the sugar rush.' She delved into her handbag to retrieve her purse as Jason waved away her offer to pay with his hand.

'It's fine. I'll pay for this. Do you want anything?' 

Jess thought for a moment. 'Just a skinny latte would be nice.'

As Jason headed off with Ruby towards the counter to get the popcorn and drinks, Jess stood watching them walk away. Jason really was amazing with Ruby, she thought to herself as she saw Ruby look up at him adoringly, grin with excitement and slip her hand into his.

'So who is sitting where?' Jess asked, as she joined them a moment later once she'd collected the tickets. 

'We've already decided - well, Ruby has. She said I have to sit in the middle so that I can share her popcorn and you can hold my hand if you want to. Isn't that what you said, Ruby?' he looked down at her.

Ruby nodded enthusiastically as she took the box of popcorn from Jason and they made their way out of the foyer towards the screens.

Taking their seats, Jason handed Jess her latte. 'Are we going to hold hands Jess?' he said in a low voice to her, waggling his eyebrow suggestively at her before slipping his black rimmed glasses on.

'If you play your cards right...' she whispered back, smiling at him cheekily as she settled in the seat next to him and shrugged off her winter jacket. 

As the adverts began, Jess plucked up the courage and slid her hand over the top of Jason's until she could hold his hand properly. Her fingertips traced small circles on his hand as she gained in confidence. 

Jason settled back in the seat ready to watch the film. It felt nice having Jess's hand in his, he realised. He couldn't remember ever going to the cinema with a woman, apart from during the ten year gap when the group had split up. When he'd been in the band he would never have dared to go to the cinema because he'd be mobbed by their fans. He curled his hand around hers and leant closer to her. 'Do you know, I was just thinking I can't remember the last time I went with a woman who wasn't my sister to the cinema. Thank you for asking me.'

Jess turned her head to whisper back to him. 'Thank you for coming. Ruby was so excited.'

'And how about you, Jess?'

'That goes without saying, Jay. I enjoy spending time with you too,' she gave him a naughty grin. 'Do you know how hot you look in glasses?' she put her head to one side as she studied him.

'So I gather from the comments I've heard have been said in the playground by some of the mums,' he grinned at her, feeling slightly embarrassed as he said the words. 

The film began and all other conversation was forgotten as the lights dimmed further. Jess could feel the pressure of Jason's hand holding hers until around half an hour into the film when it slackened and she realised he was fast asleep. His head was tilted towards her as he slept on oblivious. Tapping Ruby on the knee, she pointed at Jason dead to the world and they both giggled that he'd only managed half an hour before dozing off.

'Well he is old mummy. Maybe he gets tired easily.' Ruby whispered across Jason's snoring form towards Jess in the darkness.

'I think you're right Rubes.' Jess laughed, looking once more at him. 'We'll leave him to get some shut-eye so he's got enough energy to cook dinner afterwards, shall we?'

Ruby nodded vigorously, thinking it was hilarious that Jason could sleep through such a brilliant film as Sherlock Gnomes was turning out to be.

An hour later, the lights went up and a Jason looked around him blearily as he tried to work out where he was. 'Did I miss the film?' he asked, feeling instantly guilty that he'd offered to take them to the cinema and then slept through virtually the whole film by the looks of things.

'Um, yes!' Jess laughed softly. 'I take it you were tired?'

'Just a bit. I was marking books until late last night, so I could spend the day with you both. I went out for a run this morning, so I'm guessing those two things combined tired me out,' he admitted sheepishly, rubbing his eyes.

'It's fine, Jay. Honestly!' Jess assured him, feeling a bit sorry for him as he looked mortified. 'You can make it up to us with dinner, can't you?'

'Are you sure?' he asked, still feeling embarrassed and hoping he hadn't been doing anything like dribbling or snoring.

'Yes.' Jess replied, wanting to put her arms around him as he looked at her like a lost little boy. 'Come on. Let's get to yours and you can make amends by cooking us some dinner.'

Half an hour later they were at Jason's flat and he busied himself getting their dinner. 'Make yourself comfortable and help yourself to drinks!' he threw over his shoulder to Jess as he slid the Enchiladas he'd made earlier into the oven.

Jess poured herself a glass of New Zealand Sauvignon Blanc from a bottle in the vast wine cooler set in the kitchen island and then poured Ruby a glass of orange juice. 'Did you want a glass Jay?' she held the wine bottle aloft as she asked the question.

Jason shook his head. 'No, I'll have a Peppermint tea as I'm driving you and Ruby home later.'

Jess nodded and took Ruby's juice into the lounge, where she was sitting on the floor colouring in a picture of a unicorn from a colouring book which Jason had bought for her. On returning to the kitchen, she filled the kettle while Jason laid cutlery out on the kitchen table.

Jason put the cutlery down and wandered over to where Jess stood as she rummaged around in the cupboard looking for his Peppermint tea. 'Here, let me...' he murmered, moving her aside and immediately finding the box, which he handed her. 'Is Ruby ok?' he asked, standing behind her watching as she flicked the kettle on to boil.

Jess nodded as she dropped the teabag into a mug. She could feel her neck prickling as she sensed him watching her. 'Yes, thanks for the colouring book and pencils. She'll be busy for hours!'

'You're welcome....' he dropped a kiss on her neck and wrapped his arms around her waist. He felt her shiver involuntarily at the touch of his lips on her neck as she turned around and wound her arms around his neck.

'Did you mean what you said earlier?' 

'What did I say earlier?' he said teasingly, instantly remembering what he'd said to her quietly. He hadn't been 100% sure she'd heard him properly as he'd said what was on his mind at the time.

'You can't stop thinking about me or words to that effect?' she cocked her head to one side and studied him, noticing that he was blushing ever so slightly.

Jason ran his tongue over his bottom lip and tugged on his lip with his teeth as he tried to work out what to say without sounding soppy. 'Yes, I can't stop thinking about you. The only time I'm not thinking of you is when I'm teaching - because I'm so busy. Friday night when I saw you out in that skirt I couldn't take my eyes off you. You looked beautiful and sexy,' he stopped talking abruptly, not daring to voice all of his innermost thoughts about her in case he scared her to death. He'd imagined making love to her, hearing her gasp his name and he'd wondered what she'd look like undressing in front of him. Those feelings confused the hell out of him as she was so far from his usual type. It was so long since he'd dated a woman and never one with a child. In the past he'd dated lots of girls when he was still in the band. Back then, these women were gym bunnies and would look good on his arm, but once you got beneath the glamorous clothes and in bed with them their bodies were hard and angular, with no softness to them. At the time it didn't really bother him, because he saw the envious looks he was getting at awards ceremonies that he could pull girls as glamorous as they all were. If only those men looking at him enviously had known how many of the girls faked orgasms when he took them to bed. He often found once he got in bed with them he had no connection whatsoever and felt used and ashamed of himself afterwards. That was one of the reasons he'd left the band - to find someone he could connect with. He couldn't spend the rest of his life with nobody special in it.

Jess reached up and danced her fingertips across his stubble. 'Well that's good because I can't stop thinking about you either. It's not normal to be thinking about your daughter's teacher like I am is it?'

'And in what way are you thinking of me, Jess?' he asked softly, his hands either side of her face as he looked deep into her eyes.

Jess felt mesmerised by his eyes as she looked into them. 'I don't know, Jason. I love being with you. Ruby really likes you too. I just don't want to jump in feet first and she gets confused and upset. That's all,' she shrugged as she tried to put into words how she was feeling. She was scared to introduce Jason into their well ordered life her boyfriend if it didn't work out. She knew without doubt that she was beginning to fall for him and the thought did scare her a little.

Jason heaved a small sigh. 'Sometimes you just have to throw caution to the wind, Jess. I really like you. I wanted to ask you and Ruby to stay at my house with me in the Lake District for a long weekend over Easter. I have a small house by the lake in Ambleside. There's a bedroom for Ruby and one for you too. I don't expect you to share my room - not unless you want to, of course?' he laughed softly, tucking a stray a curl behind her ear. 'What do you think.'

Jess looked back at him in surprise. 'Wow! You have a house there! I'm seriously impressed!'

'I did have one in London too when I was in the band,' he said sheepishly, worried in case she'd think he was being a flash git.

'Hark at you Mr Moneybags!' Jess laughed and reached up to draw him down to kiss her, pressing her body against his as their tongues entwined in a long kiss. 

'So what do you think? Do you fancy coming away for the weekend?'

'I'd love to. Shall we see what Ruby says too?' Jess asked, knowing instantly that Ruby would be beyond excited.

Jason nodded. 'Dinner is ready. We'll ask her over dinner, shall we?'

Jess nodded in contentment and kissed him one final time. 'Yes. I think that's a great idea.'


	23. Chapter 23

‘So, Ruby... I've been talking to your mum. Would you both like to come away on holiday at Easter?' Jason asked, putting her smaller portion of the Enchiladas onto a plate and handing it to her.

'On an aeroplane, Jason?' Ruby squeaked at the top of her voice, hardly able to contain her excitement. She'd only ever been on a plane once before to Spain and from what she vaguely remembered of it Jess and Steve had argued nearly non-stop the whole time.

'Well, maybe another time Ruby. I have a house by a lake and we can go out on canoes and bikes. What do you think? Would you like that?' Jason asked, giving her a winning smile.

Ruby's facial expressions veered between excitement and then disappointment that she wouldn't be going on a plane and then back to excitement when she heard the words Lake and canoes. 'Yes please. Did mummy say yes?' she glanced over at Jess to check she was ok with going and Jess smiled back and nodded. 'Yes please!' Ruby repeated again, hardly able to keep a lid on her excitement.

'Well, that's sorted then. I'll pick you both up on the Thursday before Good Friday and we can come back Easter Monday or the Tuesday - whenever suits you Jess?' he looked at Jess questioningly.

Jess nodded and gave him a broad grin. 'I think we can do until the Tuesday as long as we don't drive you mad?' 

'You two could never do that. I love spending time with you both,' Jason assured her, thinking if only she knew how much he enjoyed their company. 'I got in contact with Dougie to see if he is down that way at Easter with his wife and their kids. Would you fancy meeting them? I'm sure you'll get on well with them both and his daughter is close to Ruby's age?'

Jess looked confused for a moment. 'Dougie? Is he a relative or friend?'

'Sorry, I wasn't thinking. Howard. Dougie is his nickname. That's what we all call him.'

'You mean Howard? Howard from Take That?'

'Well unless you know of any other Howard's you want to meet? Yeah, Howard from Take That.' 

Jess looked at him, feeling unsure as to how she felt. She thought Gary was lovely, but that didn't mean Howard would be nice too.

'If you're worried about meeting someone famous, don't be. Dougie is a scream. He has no filter and he's the most down to earth person you could meet. Besides, you were fine with Gaz and me.'

'Yeah, but that doesn't count! I didn't know Gary was famous when we met and well, you aren't famous - not anymore.' Jess said, stating the obvious.

Jason laughed and held his hand to his heart. 'Ouch! that was hurtful!'

'But true...' Jess stuck her tongue out playfully. 'Well, as you say he's lovely, then why not?'

'Great. I'll ring him this evening. Gaz gave me a bit of a telling off as I've not been in touch with Doug. He's messaged me a couple of times and I've just been so busy I forgot to return them.'

'Does he have a house near yours?' Jess asked, thinking it must be great to have more than one house. She struggled to keep just one over her head, let alone two or three houses.

'Yes, he has one in the Lake District, one in Manchester and one in London. He lives in London most of the time as it's more convenient for TV appearances, but his family is from up here.' Jason finished his dinner and pushed his plate away.

'But you got rid of your London one?' Jess asked, finding it hard to imagine having houses all over the country.

Jason's mouth twisted slightly as he thought back to selling his house. It had been sort of a relief selling it, because once he had it felt like he'd well and truly left his old world behind. 'Yes I did. A lot of fans knew I had a place in South Kensington and they'd literally hang around for hours waiting outside cafes or shops they knew I frequented. I could never just be myself down there, if you know what I mean?'

Jess nodded thoughtfully, thinking being famous wasn't all it was cracked up to be. She wasn't too sure how she'd feel if she were in his shoes. 'Though I guess the money helps make it a bit easier?'

Jason shrugged in answer to her question. 'Yeah, but in the end it's a question of what's most important to you - money, fame and loneliness or sanity and finding someone special in your life. I wasn't very good at mixing the two together.'

'Oh, in what way?' Jess finished her dinner and pushed her plate away from her. She noticed Ruby had also finished her dinner and was looking slightly bored at the adult conversation. 'Ruby why don't you go and do some colouring?'

'There's a big toy-box in the spare room. Come with me Ruby and I'll show you,' he turned to look at Jess as Ruby got up from her chair. 'Hold that thought and I'll be back in a minute. Why don't you fix us both a glass of wine and go into the lounge?'

Jess nodded and tidied the dishes away, before pouring them both a glass of wine and going into the lounge to wait. Wandering over to the sound system she nosed through the CD's neatly lined up in alphabetical order and noticed they had similar music tastes. 

Jason was back a couple of minutes later, followed by Ruby with an armful of dolls which belonged to Tilly. Sitting next to Jess on the sofa, he took the wine glass from her and turned to look at her. 'So, in answer to your earlier question... 'when I said I wasn't good at mixing the two together, what I meant was that I was earning the money and I had the fame - more than I could ever have imagined when we first started out. But I was so bloody lonely! I did have a girlfriend for a while, but the press intrusion ruined it and then it was just a succession of women who didn't give a shit about me and I didn't give a shit about them. I just needed someone on my arm to make me look like I was happy. But I wasn't. The relentless cycle of recording, promoting, touring and then no special person to talk to or make love with at the end of the day just took it's toll on my mental health. I had to get out before I went crazy.'

Jess looked at him sadly. She could tell by his anguished expression that even now he still had his doubts sometimes that he'd done the right thing. 'And have you found what you were looking for?'

Jason looked directly at her and sighed. 'I'm getting there. I love my job and I'm at peace at long last. I'm not as lonely any more either - not since I met you especially. I really like being with you.'

Jess looked at him in surprise. 'I like being with you too,' she replied, wishing she could throw caution to the wind and kiss him. If Ruby hadn't been there she would have done.

'Well that's good then. At least we're on the same page,' he took a sip of his wine as his eyes twinkled at her over the rim of the glass.

Back at home two hours later, Jess busied herself paying for Ruby's school dinners and getting her school clothes ready for the next day, while Ruby made sure her schoolbooks were in her ruck sack. Jason had hurriedly dropped a kiss on her lips as he dropped them off, knowing Ruby was watching the pair of them and said he'd text her later in the week to meet up.

'Did you enjoy yourself today, Ruby?' Jess asked, shooting a smile in her direction as she closed her ruck sack.

Ruby nodded. 'Yes I did. I really like Jason. He's nicer to me than daddy. Do I really have to go visit him the weekend before we go on holiday?' Ruby asked. She hated visiting her dad and she hated Cheryl even more and just the thought of going filled her with dread.

'You really should go and see him Ruby,' Jess sighed, completely understanding why her daughter didn't want to go.

'But I hate going. Cheryl is nasty to me and she says if I'd rather stay at home with you I can.' 

'Does she say that when your dad is around?'

'No, she waits until he's not in the room, but I don't think he wants me there either. I'm bored when I'm there as we never do anything.'

'I'll speak to your dad about doing nice things with you and that Cheryl is nasty to you.' Jess assured her, her heart ached that her daughter disliked being with Steve. Most fathers seemed to go the other way and spoil their kids rotten when they split - Danni's ex did, she thought to herself. Steve was the opposite - cold, disinterested and not interested in playing his part at all in her upbringing. She looked at Ruby, thinking how lucky she was to have such a beautiful daughter. 'Come on. Bed.' She gestured towards the stairs with her head and fixed Ruby with a look so she knew she meant it.

When she got back downstairs her mobile was ringing. Picking it up, she was surprised to see it was Jason. 'Hi, is everything ok?'

'Yes, everything is fine. I just wanted to thank you and tell you I had a lovely day.'

'So did we, Jay.' Jess said softly. 'Thank you for taking us out.'

'You're welcome....' he hesitated momentarily, feeling slightly embarrassed. 'I actually wanted to hear your voice again.'

'But you only spoke to me two hours ago!' she laughed teasingly, a warm feeling running through her at his words. 

'I know. Jess, I just wanted to tell you that I really like you,' Jason turned red at his end of the phone at how lame he sounded. 'Christ Jess, you must think I'm sad!'

'No, I'm flattered. I really like you too Jay.' Jess grinned widely, thinking she could hardly believe someone who looked like him was confessing that he liked her.

'Are you free to meet up for dinner on Saturday night? Or if you can't get a sitter the three of us could go out Saturday lunchtime?'

'I'll ask mum or Danni. I'm sure it will be fine Jay. I'll text you once I've checked. Is that ok?'

'Yes. I look forward to it.'

Once she'd finished on the phone, Jess checked the time wasn't too late and made up her mind to ring Steve there and then. She speed-dialled his number and curled her legs under her on the sofa as she waited for him to answer. Jess heard the click as he picked up and took a deep breath, before speaking decisively as he spoke.

'Steve. It's Jess.'

'Yeah, I guessed. What did you want want?' Steve answered testily, assuming it was with about maintenance or childcare.

'I've been trying to get hold of you.'

'I know,' his statement hung in the air.

'It's about Ruby....'

'Well I guessed it was about her. What's up?' Steve's tone was one of boredom, like he couldn't wait to get off the phone.

'We've been invited away Easter weekend. Ruby finishes ten days before that so would you like her to come to you the weekend before for a few days? It's just Ruby thinks Cheryl doesn't want her there and she says she's bored when she comes to stay.'

'Well I'll need to speak with Cheryl. Ruby is a bit of a pain when she's here to be honest, Jess.'

Jess bit her tongue as she thought what she really wanted to say. 'So do you want her or not? I wouldn't want to put you out!' she snapped, feeling exasperated with his lack of compassion for their daughter. She desperately tried to keep a lid on her anger as for a few seconds there was silence at the other end of the phone.

'Jess, I'm going to be honest with you. I've been avoiding your calls.' 

'No shit Sherlock! I guessed that as I've tried you God knows how many times and you've not picked up or returned my calls. I'm not fucking stupid!'

'Jess, don't swear at me!'

'When it comes to my daughter I'll fucking swear all I want. You're a shit dad!' 

'We'd rather she didn't come any more. I'm sorry. It's too disruptive to our life.'

'You selfish bastard!' Jess knew she should be relieved that Steve had dispensed with the need for her to discuss how unhappy Ruby was when she went to stay. Not only that it meant she didn't need to ask if Ruby didn't want to come would he would be ok. Despite that, she couldn't believe Steve didn't want to see his own daughter. 'So are you going to tell her Steve? You at least owe her that.'

'Can't you? It would be better for you to tell her face to face than me tell her over the phone.' Steve asked, not even having the good grace to be apologetic.

'So you're taking the coward's way out? I shouldn't be surprised really.' Jess said angrily, rubbing her temple as she felt her head begin to thump with stress.

'Don't be sarcastic Jess. It doesn't suit you. It'll sound better from you - you'll know what to say.' Steve said, his tone turning from snappy to wheedling as he knew he needed to be nicer to get her to do his dirty work for him.

'Fine. I'll find a time to tell her if you don't have the balls to tell her yourself.'

'And about maintenance....I'm going to be doing the childcare when mine and Cheryl's baby is born as she's got herself a really fantastic high-powered job. So it makes sense for me to be a house husband and in light of this we'll need to renegotiate maintenance as I won't be earning as much.'

'I'll get my solicitor onto it Steve.' Jess said coldly, thinking he had some cheek announcing not only that he didn't want to see his daughter anymore, but also that he wanted to cut the maintenance payments at the same time.

'You do that, Jess. Thanks for agreeing to tell Ruby. What will you tell her?'

'Well I could tell her that her father no longer wants to see her because he's a heartless shit who's pussy-whipped by his new Mrs into agreeing to dump his daughter, but I'm not that much of a bitch.' Jess shot back at him sarcastically, before continuing. 'Don't worry, I'll think of something that doesn't make you look like the person you really are!' her hands were shaking with a mixture of anger and sorrow for Ruby as she slammed the phone down on him without even saying goodbye.


	24. Chapter 24

The rest of the week went by quickly as Jess worked extra hours at work and Jason was busy teaching. Luckily her mum had agreed to sit and had said she would come to Jess's house. Jason had booked them a table at Thaikhun as Jess had said she liked Thai food and she was looking forward to seeing him again, as the only contact they'd had was a fleeting smile and wave when she picked Ruby up from her guitar lesson.

Jason arrived at 6.30pm on the Saturday night. Jess had tried to persuade him to let her drive, but he'd been insistent that he would pick her up. She was still upstairs getting changed when he arrived. 'I'll be down in a minute!' she called out, as she heard her mum let him in and Ruby immediately begin chattering to him about their trip to the Trafford centre to buy some clothes for the following weekend. She found her favourite long necklace with multi-coloured beads, which Ruby had bought her for Christmas using her pocket money and checked her hair still looked as it should, before slipping her feet into her new ankle boots. As she descended the stairs she could hear the low murmer of voices filtering up from the kitchen as Jason spoke to her mum.

As Jess entered the room Jason's eyes lit up when he saw her. 'Hi Jess. You look lovely,' he remarked, kissing her chastely on the cheek as she drew level with him and picked up her small handbag from the worktop.

Jess blushed slightly as she thanked him and called out to Ruby that they were leaving. 'Now, be good for nanna, Ruby,' she fixed her with a stern look as she folded Ruby into her arms and kissed her forehead.

'Yes. I promise. Will you be home when I wake in the morning?' Ruby asked. She didn't mind staying at her nanna's house, but always preferred to be at home as it meant Jess was there when she woke in the morning.

Jess nodded and gave her one last hug and kiss before they both made their way outside and into the car.

'So you've been out buying clothes for next weekend I hear?' Jason asked, as they drove through the streets in the direction of the restaurant.

'Yes, I bought us some waterproofs in case it's wet, some walking boots and a dress each in case we go out anywhere nice for dinner.'

'You think I might take you somewhere nice then?' Jason winked at her, knowing they would go out somewhere at some point during the weekend.

'Well, a girl can hope...' Jess teased back.

Half an hour later they were in the restaurant and had ordered a small platter of vegetarian starters to share and a Chicken massaman curry for Jess and a Vegetarian one for Jason. 

Jason took a sip of his Thai Lemon tea and sat back in his seat, his eyes looking her up and down shamelessly. 'You look lovely.'

'I know. You told me earlier.' Jess shot back with a cheeky grin, thinking this was quite fun. She couldn't remember the last time a man had looked at her quite like that.

'I like that outfit on you. You wore it that night I was out with Gaz didn't you?' he leant forward so that only she could hear what he was saying. 'It's very sexy. And I like your hair like that. It's really pretty.'

'Stop it. I'm really flattered, but I'm not sexy.' Jess blushed bright red, her hand automatically going to pat her hair which Danni had helped her to do that night. She had taken up the sides and twisted them up, tying them at the back, and curled the back of her hair into loose ringlets which tumbled halfway down her back.

'Well I think you are, Jess.' 

Jess breathed a sigh of relief as the waiter turned up with their starters. She didn't know how to handle Jason's flattery. At the beginning, Steve had been attentive, but hadn't said some of the things to her that Jason said and she found it disconcerting, because she didn't see herself that way and she wasn't sure how to respond.

Jason narrowed his eyes and studied Jess. He realised by the look of confusion on her face that she wasn't used to compliments. 'Sorry I didn't mean to embarrass you.'

'It's fine Jay. I'm just not used to compliments. In fact, towards the end Steve was anything but complimentary to me about how I looked. Talking of which...'

Jason gestured his hand to indicate that Jess should take some of the starter before he took his. 'Go on...' he prompted, guessing she had some news about Steve.

'I spoke to him on Sunday evening about Ruby,' she replied, putting some of the starter on the plate in front of her, before continuing. 'He doesn't want any more contact with her. It's too inconvenient to have her stay.' She said the words in a bitter tone, as she recalled back to their heated conversation a few days earlier.

'He said that! Oh Jess that's awful! He's her father for God's sake! He can't just abdicate all responsibility.'

Jess shrugged sadly. 'I guess he can and he has. I know that I was going to speak to him about Ruby being unhappy there and check he was still happy having her, but I honestly never thought he would actually say he didn't want her at all. She's his daughter after all.' She paused to take a bite of her Fishcake, before continuing. 'He also wants to reduce her maintenance, because he reckons he's going to be a house-husband when Cheryl has their baby.'

'It's just so wrong, Jess! If I had a child and was no longer with the mother I'd still want to be part of it's life. There's no way I would behave like that.' He put down his fork and looked at her, feeling immensely sorry for Ruby.

'Well I guess that's where you and him are very different, Jay. I was so angry with him I called him a few names which he didn't like. He told me not to swear at him. I couldn't help it I just saw red.'

'What did you call him?' Jason's lips twitched in amusement at the thought of Steve telling Jess to stop swearing. He found it hard to believe that she'd sworn so much that Steve had asked her to stop.

'Um, a selfish bastard and a shit dad,' she covered her eyes with her hand in embarrassment at the final insult she'd hurled at him. 'And I said he was pussy-whipped,' she said quietly, her face reddening that he'd made her so angry she'd said it.

Jason burst out laughing in surprise. 'Oh, god! I wish I'd been a fly on the wall to hear you say that. You look so sweet and innocent I wouldn't expect you'd even know words like that. That's hilarious!' he continued laughing for a few moments before his face became more serious again. 'So how did Ruby take it?'

'I haven't told her yet. How do you tell a kid that her dad doesn't want her or love her? I don't want her to feel rejected. I've told her that he's away this weekend and that's why he can't have her to stay. I just need to figure out what to tell her.' Jess looked at him, confusion crossing her face at her dilemma.

'You could tell her while we're away next weekend. Me being there may help diffuse the situation. We can plan something nice once you've told her to take her mind off things. I think I'd be inclined to say he isn't working and with the baby coming along they can't have her for a while. Or something along those lines.' Jason suggested, trying to think of something which would soften the blow. 

'Yes, I was thinking along those lines too.' Jess replied and gave him a small smile as he reached across the table and took her hand in his. 'Thank you. You've been amazing.'

'Ah, it's nothing. I think a lot of you both and it breaks my heart that he wants nothing to do with such a gorgeous, funny and kind kid.'

'Thanks Jason. That's a really kind thing to say.'

The waiter arrived and cleared their plates and was back a few minutes later with their main meals. 'Are you ok if I collect you after lunch on Thursday? I forgot that I need to get a haircut, so I'll need to get that done first.' Jason asked as he took a sip of his tea.

'Would you like me to cut it for you? I trained as a hairdresser and cut hair for quite a while before Ruby was born. I still do a few friends hair for extra money now and then.' Jess suggested, thinking she'd like nothing more to run her hands through his hair. 'I can bring my scissors and other bits and pieces with me.'

'Are you sure?' Jason asked. 'I don't want to put you out.'

'No, it's not a problem. Maybe text me Thursday morning to remind me to pack them.' She spooned some of her chicken curry onto her plate alongside the rice and began to eat.

Jason nodded. 'So will you be washing my hair too?' he grinned, winking sexily at her. 'Y'know you could get in the shower with me and wash it?'

'If you want me to wash it I can. Though only over the sink. Don't you be getting any ideas of me getting in the shower with you to do it.' Jess burst out laughing at his cheekiness. Just the thought of him in a shower was making her feel all hot and bothered, the more she thought about it.

As they left the restaurant later that evening, Jason turned to Jess. 'Would you like to go for drinks or would you like to relieve your mum from her babysitting duties?' 

Jess checked her watch and was surprised to see it was nearly 10pm. They had sat talking for ages after they'd finished eating and as the restaurant wasn't full they hadn't pushed them to vacate their table. 'Would you mind if we went back? I'm really tired for some reason. I can make you a peppermint tea or a soft drink back at mine.'

'Of course not. I'm just happy to be in your company, Jess.' He folded her into his arms and kissed a lingering kiss onto her upturned lips, before pulling regretfully away and taking hold of her hand in his to walk back to the car.

Jess's mum Maggie looked up in surprise as Jess and Jason walked into the lounge half an hour later. 'Oh, you're home earlier than I expected!' she remarked, noticing it was only 10.30pm. 'Did you have a nice time?'

'Yes, it was great. The food was delicious and we decided to come back here for a drink.' Jess said, stifling a small yawn.

'Well, I'll leave you two to enjoy the rest of your evening.' Maggie remarked, gathering her knitting up and putting it in her knitting bag. 'Don't worry, I'll see myself out.' She hugged Jess as she said thanks for looking after Ruby and gave Jason a small wave, before heading out the door.

As the front door shut behind Maggie, Jess turned to Jason. 'What would you like to drink?'

'Well I'd better have that Peppermint tea seeing as I have to drive home.' Jason gave her a wry smile and followed her into the kitchen.

'I don't mind driving next time,' Jess threw over her shoulder as she opened the cupboard door to retrieve the tea and busied herself getting a mug for them each to have one.

'Ah, I don't mind.' Jason lounged against the worktop and folded his arms as he surreptitiously eyed her up as she made their drinks. He had to admit, the longer he knew her the more sexy he found her.

Jess picked up the cups and turned to hand Jason his. 'Were you looking at me?' she asked, catching him red-handed as he tried to swing his eyes quickly back to her face.

'Yeah, you caught me. Sorry!' Jason blushed slightly and took the mug from her hand. 'You look seriously hot in that outfit. I've struggled to keep my eyes off your legs.'His gaze swept from her feet still in her black ankle boots and up her legs until they reached the skirt, which ended a couple of inches above the knee. 

Jess blushed slightly at his words. 'Thank you,' she whispered, not quite sure how to respond to his compliments again. 'Shall we go through to the lounge?' she asked, trying to change the subject.

Jason nodded and followed her into the cosy lounge. He cast his eyes over the photos of Ruby and Jess and others displayed around the room of Jess and Danni with their mum and a man he assumed was her dad. Picking up a framed photo of the girls aged around 8 and 10 with the same man, he looked at her. 'Is this your dad?'

Jess nodded and looked at him sadly. 'Yeah, he died when I was 14. He was killed in an accident at work'

'And your mum. Did she ever re-marry?' he put the photo back down and turned to look at her.

'No. Dad was the love of her life. They'd known each other since they were teenagers. I was sort of hoping that's what I was getting with Steve, but he was anything but the love of my life.' 

Jason narrowed his eyes as he looked at her, thinking she'd had a lucky escape judging by how she said Steve had behaved. He sat down on the sofa and put his mug down on the table next to it. 'Jess, come here....'

Jess sat down next to him and was immediately encircled in his arms, as he pulled her towards him for a hug. She laid her head in the crook of his neck and allowed him to hug her tightly to him as she relaxed into his arms.

'Maybe one day you will find that,' he whispered against her ear.

Jess shivered slightly at the tickling feeling of his stubble on her ear and pulled back to look at him. His eyes stared back at hers and for a moment she felt lost in his gaze as time seemed to stand still. Bending her head towards him, her lips sought his and claimed them in a long kiss which seemed to go on forever. 

As they eventually pulled apart Jason looked at her, wondering exactly how to broach the subject. 'Um, Jess should I ask my cleaner at the cottage to make up a separate room for you or not next weekend?'

Jess thought about it for a minute, her heart wrestling with her head. Throwing caution to the wind she decided. 'If it's ok with you can I share your bed?'


	25. Chapter 25

Jason arrived to pick Jess and Ruby up late Thursday morning as agreed. Ruby had been up since the crack of dawn as she was so excited and had woken Jess up as she slid into the bed next to her at 5am.

'Jason's here mummy!' Ruby called, from her vantage point by the front window where she had been waiting since just after 9am.

Jess came into the room, her teeth gnawing at her bottom lip with a combination of nervousness and excitement. She was feeling slightly worried that he wouldn't be able to fit everything in his boot. Their pile of belongings looked like they were going for two weeks rather than just five days. 'Ruby, go and get your trainers on while I open the door for Jason.'

Ruby did as she was told and ran to the back door to collect her trainers from where she'd kicked them off the evening before after playing in the back garden while Jess hurried to the front door, opening it wide. 'Hi Jess!'Jason remarked, leaning forward and taking hold of her hand as he gave her a friendly kiss on the cheek. 'I'll give you a proper kiss later,' he murmered, so only she would hear as his lips left her cheek. 

'I'm afraid there's quite a lot of things,' Jess remarked, colouring slightly as she led him into the lounge and looked again at the pile.

'I didn't bring much as I have clothing there and my cleaner went to the supermarket to make sure we had some food and drink in. So I've only got the basics with me. There's plenty of room for these.' He began to gather up their belongings, turning around as Ruby hurtled into the room shouting his name and throwing her arms around his waist. 'Hi Ruby! I take it you're excited?' he waited until she nodded and then looked down at her. 'How about you give me a hand with your things while your mum locks up?' he raised his eyebrow at her, his eyes twinkling in amusement at her excitement as he handed her one of the smaller bags to carry.

Twenty minutes later they were on their way and Jess slid a glance across at a Jason. 'Thank you for bringing us. Ruby has been up since 5am, because she's so excited.

Jason indicated to join the M61 motorway before taking her hand in his. 'You're welcome. I've been looking forward to it.' His eyes flicked up to the rear view mirror to check on Ruby. 'She's fell asleep already so she must be tired from waking up so early.' He looked over to Jess and smiled at her. 'Did you bring your scissors? My hair is getting a bit long.'

Jess turned around to check on Ruby, before answering. 'Yes, they're in my bag. I'm very expensive - just so you know.'

'I'll pay you in kind.' He chuckled dirtily and squeezed her hand so she was under no illusion as to what he meant.

Jess tried valiantly not to think about what he meant and failed, as the thought of him kissing his way down her body crossed her mind. 'So what do you have planned for the three of us today?' She asked, desperately trying to change the subject before her mind descended further into the gutter.

'Maybe lunch and then we can take Ruby out in the canoe as the weather is looking nice and then maybe you could cut my hair when we get back. What do you think?'

'That sounds good to me. Would you mind if I maybe told Ruby what's going on with her dad at lunchtime and then she'll have something to occupy her mind this afternoon if we go out on the canoe? I'm thinking I really should get it out the way.'

'Yes of course,' he looked back in the mirror to check Ruby was still asleep. 'Howard asked us over tomorrow for the day. He did mention that if Ruby feels happy and gets on with his daughter Eloise then she's welcome to stay tomorrow night. I've also got something planned for Easter Sunday to keep Ruby amused. So she won't have too much time to dwell on Steve and what a shit dad he is.'

Jess looked at Jason, thinking once again how much he seemed to care about Ruby far more than her ex used to. 'Thank you. It sounds like you've been putting a lot of thought into this weekend.' She also hadn't missed the throw-away comment about Ruby staying at Howard's house if she wanted and wondered whether Howard had suggested it to Jason or whether Jason had mentioned it to Howard, so that they could be alone for the evening. The thought of being alone with him was a mixture of exciting and terrifying all at once. 

Jason met her gaze unflinchingly. 'I have. I want you both to enjoy yourselves.'

An hour later they arrived on the outskirts of Ambleside and Jason continued driving towards the road signposted to Upper Loughrigg. They continued along the riverside until they arrived outside a modern one storey building overlooking the river, set in its own grounds looking towards Ambleside and the mountains in the distance.

'I thought you said you live in a cottage?' Jess asked, her nose wrinkling in confusion as Jason stopped the car and switched off the engine. 'I'd say that's a bit more than a mere cottage,' she remarked, thinking it looked huge.

'Sorry, figure of speech.' Jason admitted, getting out the car and starting to take their belongings out of the car boot.

Jess jumped out of the car and began to help with their belongings, eager to see inside the house as she followed Jason to the door.

Jason unlocked the house, opening the door wider so Jess and Ruby could go inside. 'You go inside and have a nosey and I'll bring the things in.' 

'Ruby, shoes off!' Jess instructed, as soon as they were inside as she saw that the floor tiles were a very light grey in colour. She knew instantly that every foot-print would show up on it. Ruby did as she was told and swiftly removed her trainers, her eyes swivelling around as she took it all in.

Jess removed her own trainers and wandered around, her eyes round at the beautiful ultra-modern house. The kitchen was a similar light grey to the tiles and was a large rectangular shape, leading to an open plan modern dining area and on into a cosy lounge complete with log burner and dark grey corner sofa. They continued walking around as Jason dumped the last of the bags in the hallway. 'I think this is the room Jay has had made up for you Ruby.' Jess remarked, walking into a double room and noticing that it was modern, but had some kids toys on the shelves built into the wall. Ruby went straight over to the shelf and immediately started poking about to see what toys were on the shelves. Jess continued her exploring and left Ruby to play with the new found toys. She walked along the hallway until she reached a room which she assumed was Jason's at the other end. It was more masculine and decorated in hues of grey and cream with a king size bed and a large wardrobe and book shelf on either side of the wall. Jess's feet sank into the dark grey carpet as she looked around the room, noticing very few personal possessions apart from yet more guitars and his aftershave and a glasses case sitting on the bedside table. Leading off the bedroom was a huge bathroom with walk in shower and bathtub. It was noticeable that even though it was tasteful and impressive it lacked a woman's touch. She wandered over to the floor to ceiling windows in the bedroom and looked out at the view from the terrace outside over to the river and mountains, thinking it was truly beautiful.

'What are you thinking about?' Jason suddenly appeared behind her as she looked out of the window and looped his arms around her waist, his chin resting against her hair.

'It's beautiful. You have a lovely house and it's just so peaceful,' she answered truthfully, omitting her assessment that it lacked a woman's touch.

'I came here for a few weeks after I left the band. I just needed to get away from everything and heal myself and this bolt hole was just what I needed.'

Jess turned around, her heart contracting at the thought of him needing to escape. She looked up at him, her hand cradling his cheek as she gazed into his eyes. Standing on tip-toes, she kissed him softly on the lips. 'But you got through it. And you're happy now?'

'Yes, I'm happy now. Even happier now that I've got to know you,' he replied as he bent down and returned her kiss. 

'What did you do to heal yourself?' 

Jason shrugged nonchalantly as he pulled her closer to him and wound his arms around her waist. 'Reading. Lots of reading. Books about the meaning of life. Books about anxiety and how to deal with it. I devoured anything which could help me understand what my head was trying to deal with. I just needed time to myself I think to get to know me again, rather than Jason Orange pop star.'

'And you found your peace?'

'I did.'

Ruby suddenly appeared in the room, a doll clutched in her hand. 'I'm hungry. Can I have something to eat?' she asked, coming over to the two of them by the window and looking up at them in curiosity.'

Jason let his arms drop from around Jess's waist. 'Yes, of course. Are you going to help me so your mum can relax?'

Ruby nodded vigorously. 'Is mum your girlfriend now? It's just you were cuddling her....'

Jason's lip twitched in amusement at the question and he looked at a Jess for confirmation as to what he he should say. She simply looked back at him, an innocent expression on her face as she raised an eyebrow at him, as if to say she didn't know the answer to that question herself. He turned to look at Ruby. 'I think she may well be. Do you think she'd like to be Ruby because I've not asked her?'

'Oh yes, mummy likes you a lot I think.'

'I am here you two!' Jess scolded, jokingly. Her heartbeat lifted a notch at Jason's words. Despite her saying to him in the past that she didn't want Ruby confused by her seeing lots of men she had been worried that maybe Jason wasn't serious. 'Yes, I'd love to be,' she replied giving a shy smile up at him.

Twenty minutes later they sat eating lunch and Jess decided to broach the subject of Steve. She took a deep breath and tapped Ruby on the arm to get her attention as she was looking out the window at the river. 'Ruby, I need to talk to you about daddy.'

Ruby swivelled her head around to look at Jess. 'Have I got to go to visit him after this weekend?' her voice wobbling at the thought that their plans may have changed.

'No, Ruby. You know daddy and Cheryl have a baby due in a few weeks?' She waited for Ruby to nod, before continuing. 'Well he thinks it might be a bit too much to have you over for a while as little babies take up a lot of time. He won't be working as he'll be at home helping with the baby, so money will be tight for him too. He wanted me to tell you he loves you very much, but thinks it would be better for you to stay home with me as I have more time to love you as I only have you and no other babies. Jess cursed at Steve in her head, hating that she was having to lie to Ruby. She doubted Steve even loved Ruby very much if she thought about it, but wanted Ruby to still feel loved and wanted.

Ruby felt a small wave of relief and smiled. 'It's ok mummy. I'd rather stay with you anyway. Daddy and Cheryl aren't very nice to me sometimes.'

Jess looked at her daughter with pride. 'Come here Rubes. Give me a cuddle.' She held out her arms and folded her in for a big hug, her hand stroking her dark head as she dropped a kiss in the top of her head and her eyes glittered with unshed tears. 'I love you very much, my gorgeous girl,' she murmered under her breath as she held her in her arms.

Ruby gave her one last hug and looked at Jason. 'Can we go out in the canoe now?' she asked, almost as if the conversation hadn't even taken place a few seconds earlier.

Jason ruffled her hair. 'Of course we can. Go get your waterproof jacket and trainers and we'll get going.


	26. Chapter 26

After giving Jess quick instructions on how to paddle the canoe so they were in tandem with each other, Jason carried the canoe into the water, helping Ruby in first once he was satisfied her life jacket was properly fastened. 

'We'll head up in Ambleside direction and pull up the canoe and maybe have a drink at a cafe there if you fancy it?' he suggested, thinking it shouldn't be too far for Ruby if she wanted to try her hand at paddling herself.

Jess nodded, happy to go along with his suggestion as she didn't know the area at all. 'Is that ok with you, Ruby?' Ruby nodded too. She was just happy to be on the water and spending time away from home.

They set off at a fairly slow pace, as Jess tried to get the hang of paddling so that she didn't hold up progress. Jason threw her a look over his shoulder to check she was Ok. He noticed her forehead furrowed in concentration. 'Are you managing?' he asked her, double checking she was Ok.

'Yeah, I think I'm getting the hang of it,' she replied, with a grin as Ruby also looked over her shoulder. 'Though I guess you don't need a lot of practice, Jay. I saw you in The Flood video.'

'Did you? And did you hunt out any other videos while you were at it?' Jason joked, feeling somewhat amused that she'd obviously gone looking for at least one video. He continued paddling as he waited for her answer.

'Um, one or two...I liked that one, Kidz and Said it all,' she admitted, not wanting to actually confess that she'd whiled away a few hours on YouTube watching as many music videos as she could find as well as TV interviews. It seemed so strange to see a completely different side to the Jason she was gradually beginning to get to know and starting to have feelings for. He was confident, talkative and extremely sexy when he was in the band. The Jason now was more thoughtful, slightly more introverted and still sexy, but in a less overt way.

'I'm glad you liked them. It seems so long ago now,' Jason shrugged, as he thought back to how different things had been then.

'You don't regret leaving?'

'No,' he replied simply, indicating by his tone that for the time being the subject was closed.

Twenty minutes later they pulled up outside a waterfront cafe and Jason pulled the canoe out of the water, securing it safely so it didn't float away. 

Jess looked at Jason, thinking he'd gone very quiet since admitting she'd seen his videos. 'Shall I go and get drinks and you find us a table?'

'Can I come in too and choose an ice-cream?' Ruby asked, spying the freezer located inside the cafe entrance.

Jess nodded, looking thoughtfully again at Jason as he sat looking out over Lake Windermere, his teeth obviously gnawing at his lips and inside of his cheek. She couldn't work out for the life of her what she had said wrong. 'What do you want to drink?' she asked, thinking when they were alone she would ask him if she'd hit a raw nerve inadvertently.

Jason took a moment to reply. 'Just an Earl Grey tea, please.'

Jess disappeared into the cafe and ordered him a tea, a hot chocolate for both her and Ruby and a raspberry ripple ice-cream for Ruby. When she came back outside Jason was still looking out over the lake and looked to be in a world of his own. Jess set their drinks down on the table and handed Ruby a handful of serviettes just in case she dropped her ice-cream. 'Everything ok?' she asked, noticing he still didn't look like his usual self - the last thing she wanted was to sit in silence while he sulked about something. Her earlier thought of waiting until they were alone was forgotten.

Jason slid a glance across to her. 'Yes, why shouldn't it be?'

'It's just you've gone very quiet all of a sudden. Is it something I said?'

'No, you didn't say anything wrong.' He took a sip of his tea and fixed her with a grin which failed to reach his eyes, to assure her that he was ok.

Jess narrowed her eyes. She couldn't put her finger on it, but something was up and she guessed Jason wasn't going to say anything with a Ruby around. He might think he'd fooled her, but she'd bet money something was on his mind.

Ruby hadn't noticed a thing was up and began talking nineteen to the dozen, pointing out swans and ducks before looking straight at him, innocence written on her face. 'Jason, are there sharks in this lake?' she asked as she started looking across the water, feeling slightly worried.

'No, there's no sharks in here Ruby. The water is too cold and shallow. But if there were I would keep you and your mum safe.' Jason replied, feeling his bad mood begin to dissipate.

'And how would you do that?'

Jess stifled a giggle as she wondered how he was going to answer Ruby's question to her satisfaction.

Jason hesitated for a moment, his tongue running over his bottom lip as he thought about her question and tried to come up with an answer she would believe. 'Um, well you know the video your mummy saw me in? The Flood. Well, they taught us how to row super-fast in case a shark chased up the River Thames. Well I was the best out of the five of us and our boat today is much smaller. So I could out-row a shark. No problem at all.'

Ruby took a big lick of her ice cream and considered his answer carefully as she tried to decide if he was telling the truth, before grinning at him in relief. 'Well, that's good then. I was looking for one when we came here.'

'Well you don't need to worry now that you know I'll save you both!' Jason grinned, winking sexily at Jess while Ruby's attention was on her ice cream.

Jess's heart flipped in her chest at the wink he gave her and she felt a thread of relief run through her that Jason seemed back to normal again.

'Are you ladies ready to go back home now?' Jason fixed them both with a questioning look as Ruby finished the last of her ice-cream. Both of them nodded and stood up, following him back to the canoe to paddle home.

As they arrived back home, Ruby went to her room to collect her colouring book and pencils and went to sit at the table and chairs in the garden to do her colouring overlooking the river. Jason retrieved a couple of towels from the cupboard whilst Jess fetched her scissors, comb and clippers. He played about with the digital radio in the kitchen until he located a radio station playing some upbeat tunes and sat down on a chair to wait for Jess as Bruno Mars singing "Treasure" echoed around the room.

'Ah, you're ready!' Jess remarked, as she walked into the room and saw him waiting for her.

'Do you want me to have a shower and wash my hair or do you want to wash it over the sink?'

'Jump in the shower and I'll wait here for you. That would be easier.'

'You don't want to get in with me then and help me wash it?' Jason said jokingly, as she grabbed up the towel and flicked his backside with it.

'Not with Ruby here. But maybe another time?'

'I'll hold you to that,' he murmered, wandering over and dropping a kiss on her lips before disappearing off to the bathroom.

Jess sat back on one of the chairs at the dining table, which sat in his open plan kitchen. Jason was so mercurial, she thought to herself. He'd been happy when they paddled into Ambleside, then he'd gone weird on her when she mentioned watching his videos and now it was like nothing had happened and he was being flirty with her. She wished she could get under his skin and understand him better.

A few minutes later Jason came back. He was carrying a mirror and was clad in just a pair of beaten, ancient looking Levi 501's. 'I thought you might need this for when you cut my hair.'

Jess tried to tear her eyes away from his chest and abs, thinking this was going to make the task of cutting his hair challenging to say the least. 'Are you going to put a t-shirt on?' she asked, not sure whether she wanted him to or not.

Jason hesitated momentarily and shook his head. 'Easier without a top on then I won't find stray hairs tickling me later on. Is that ok?' 

Jess tried to shrug as if she didn't really care, praying to god that she could keep her hands steady. She pulled the chair closer to the worktop and indicated for him to sit down, propping the mirror against the kitchen cupboard so his head was central and he could see what she was doing and warn her if she got carried away with the scissors. She placed the towel around his shoulders and stood behind him, taking a deep breath as she held the comb in her left hand and scissors in the right.

'Everything ok, Jess?' Jason asked playfully, noticing she was standing there looking a bit unsure of herself. He suspected it was because he'd shown up without a top on and felt slightly guilty for doing it deliberately and flustering her.

Jess mentally shook herself, her internal voice telling her to get a grip and fixed him with a big grin. 'No, I'm fine! So, how short do you want to go and is it just a tidy up?' she ran her fingers through his hair so it stood up slightly so she could see how long it was.

'Just a tidy up is fine. Maybe a couple of centimetres off it?' he suggested, trying to ignore the delicate aroma of her perfume. It was different to the one she wore on their night out and she smelt gorgeous. 

Jess nodded and began to decisively snip away, her fingers holding the hair strands straight as she snipped the excess hair poking through her fingers. She tried to ignore Jason watching her in the mirror as she continued to work her way along the top of his head. She could see every time she began another section his eyes staring straight at her and it was disconcerting to say the least.

'You look very serious.' Jason remarked, looking up at her through his eyelashes as she moved around to the front of him, placing her fingers on his short sideburns to ascertain how much to take off. Once she'd trimmed them, she did the same again to check they were straight. 

'I need to or I'll chop off an ear. Not good if you're a teacher...' she joked, staring him straight in the eye as she held her scissors and comb together in her hand and studied him. 'Are you flirting with me, Mr Orange?'

He looked directly back at her unflinchingly. 'I think I might be Mrs Shaw.'

She moved back around behind him and swept her hand through his hair, looking at him over the top of his head as she did so and smiled flirtatiously at him in the mirror. 'Are you happy with it or do you want a bit more off?'

Jason put his head to one side to study her work and nodded in agreement. 'Yes, it's perfect.' He began to grin wickedly as he heard the lyrics of the song which was playing on the radio. Olly Murs voice was ringing around the kitchen singing "Hey, you beautiful".

Jess picked up the clippers and switched them on, putting her left hand on top of his head to hold it still so she could tidy up the back of his neck. She sensed Jason's eyes were on her as she tried to concentrate on the job in hand as Olly sang away in the background, almost like he was revealing her innermost, hidden thoughts.

"Whoa, I feel your body calling out to me

Don't deny this electricity

Know there's something dirty on your mind"

Jason could see Jess was getting well and truly flustered as she switched off the clippers and took a deep breath as Olly carried on singing about loving the chase and wanting the subject of the song to call out his name. Jason's eyes twinkled in amusement as he could see she was getting more hot and bothered at being in close proximity to him. 'You ok?' he asked her cheekily.

'Yep.' Jess replied. Taking another deep breath, she switched the clippers back on and returned the flat of her hand back to the top of his head, pushing it downwards so she could get at his neck, but also so she didn't have to look him in the eye. Her stomach was doing all sorts of funny stuff and it was almost like Olly could read her mind as she wondered what it would be like to have Jason undress her and make love to her. 'Should we really have a song like this on with Ruby around?' she said under her breath, steadying her shaky hand.

'She's outside and it's on the radio too quietly for her to hear,' Jason replied, his head looking down to his lap as she held it firmly in place to finish his neck. 

Jess finished with the clippers and snapped them off. Moving around again to face him, she inspected her work and picked up a small tub of hair wax, dipping her fingers in and massaging a blob between her palms before running them through his hair. Once she was done, she stepped aside so he could check her work in the mirror. 'What do you think?' she asked, thinking he looked extremely handsome.

Jason raised his eyes to meet hers in the mirror. 'Yes, I like it,' he replied, giving her a small smile. He tossed the towel into the laundry basket and turned back to her, pulling her into his arms for a kiss.

Jess wrapped her arms around his waist as her fingertips touched the skin where it met his jeans waistband as she returned his kiss.

After a couple of minutes kissing, Jason pulled away regretfully as he heard Ruby calling him. 'Later?' he asked her softly, his hand catching her fingertips as she let go of him.

Jess blushed, her heart hammering away in her chest as she nodded. 'Yes, later...' she replied, wondering what exactly he meant by later.


	27. Chapter 27

Jason insisted on cooking dinner that evening. While Jess and Ruby played cards in the garden overlooking the water, he made Thai Green curry for the three of them. As he chopped the lemongrass, green chillies, garlic and ginger for the paste using a recipe he'd learnt in a Thailand, he glanced every now and then at the mother and daughter closeness between the two of them, and mused to himself at the close relationship they shared. He could understand why Jess had been so adamant that she didn't want to introduce a succession of men into their life and he experienced a mixture of happiness and trepidation that he was the first man she'd allowed in.

Jess came into the kitchen and took an appreciative smell of the contents of the pan. 'It smells gorgeous, Jay,' she stood alongside him as he stood measuring out their rice and wound her arm around his waist.

'I hope you like it. I've not put as much green chili in there as usual, because I didn't think Ruby would like it too spicy,' he remarked, putting the rice packet down on the worktop and turning to face her as he dropped a kiss on her lips.

'That's really thoughtful of you,' she remarked, smiling up at him as her fingertips stroked the soft hairs on his fore-arms. 'Should we lay the table?' she gestured with her head in Ruby's direction.

'Yes, dinner won't be long,' Jason remarked, flicking the kettle on to rinse boiling water through the rice to get rid of the excess starch.

Two hours later Jess took Ruby to get her ready for bed. Once she was bathed and in her pyjamas she tucked her in. 'So, which book shall we read?' she looked through the small pile which Ruby had brought along in her rucksack.

'Can Jason read with me tonight?' Ruby asked in a tiny voice. Every night for as long as she could remember Jess had always read her bedtime story whenever they were at home and much as she liked reading with her she wanted Jason to read this time - not as her teacher, but because she liked spending time with him.

'Of course he can. If he doesn't mind,' Jess said reassuringly. 'I'll go get him.'

A couple of minutes later Jason appeared in the doorway and flashed a grin at Ruby. 'I hear you're bored of mum's stories and want me to read with you?' 

Ruby nodded vigorously and held up the book which she'd chosen while she'd been waiting for him.

'So are you going to read or am I?'

'I read one page, then you read the next,' Ruby suggested, shuffling over in the bed so Jason could sit down next to her on top of the duvet.

Whilst they were together reading, Jess poured them both a glass of wine and put the TV on, idly flicking between channels. She was feeling really nervous at the thought of being alone with Jason and sharing a bed with him that night and realised apart from saying to him that the housekeeper didn't need to make her up a separate bed when he asked, nothing more had been said. She worried he'd think she was being presumptuous that she'd been to the doctor and got the contraceptive patch or that he hadn't actually meant sleeping together like that at all and she'd end up looking stupid.

Jason finished reading the last page of Ruby's book and closed it. He ruffled her hair affectionately and smiled at her. 'Did you have a nice time today?'

'I did. I loved being on the water,' she looked at him as if weighing up whether to tell him something which she'd been wondering about on and off all day.

Jason could see Ruby had something on her mind as he saw the expression flit across her face. 'Is there something on your mind, Ruby?' he asked, knowing by intuition what she was going to say.

'My dad doesn't love me any more does he? I didn't want to ask mummy in case I upset her,' her bottom lip quivered a little as she asked the question.

Jason hesitated momentarily, unsure what to say in case he made things worse. 'Ruby, it's not that he doesn't love you. I'm sure he does - he just has a funny way of showing it. He probably feels pulled in lots of directions - I guess a bit like when I was in the band. You don't know what to do because you have lots of people wanting different things. So with you and your dad he has you, your mum and Cheryl to keep happy and of course your new half brother. With me, I had all the lads who are like my brothers, our record company and our fans to keep happy. So it's sort of the same as you can't keep everyone happy - even if you want to. Your dad is probably trying his best. He might get it wrong, but at the end of the day, he loves you. Just like I love my band-mates and they love me and maybe I've upset them and that upsets me. Does that make sense?'

Ruby nodded slowly. 'I think so. A bit like I love him, but I don't want to go and stay with him?'

'Exactly. He loves you, but at the moment Cheryl and the baby are who he needs to keep happy as the baby is little.' Jason knew he was sort of lying to make her feel better. From what Jess said Steve really didn't care, but it would achieve nothing telling Ruby the truth. 'Ok, your mum will be wondering where I've got to Ruby. Do you feel a bit better now?'

Ruby nodded and smiled up at him as he stood up. 'Thank you.'

Jason hesitated for a moment at the door. 'You're welcome. Will you be ok if I close your door?'

Ruby nodded and slid down under the quilt as Jason closed the door quietly.

As he entered the lounge Jess looked at him. 'Was she ok. You were ages.'

Jason nodded and sat down next to her on the sofa, taking the wine glass off her and taking a big mouthful of it. 'Yeah, it seems her dad not wanting her has been playing on her mind a bit. She's ok now. I had a chat with her and said it's just his priorities are different at the moment as he has a baby to think of. Was that ok?' he looked at her worriedly.

'Yes, that's perfect. Thank you.'

Jason looked at her and smiled. 'Did you have a nice time today?'

Jess sat back on the sofa as Jason half turned towards her, his arm stretched out as his hand gripped on the back of the sofa so that he could face her. 'I did. But can I ask you something?'

Jason took a sip of his wine and looked directly at her. 'Of course.'

'Did I say something I shouldn't this afternoon? You went all funny on me when I said I'd seen a few of your videos.'

Jason hesitated momentarily, wondering how to word how he'd felt. Even in his own head it sounded stupid when he dissected it.

'It's just me and my fucked up mind. Just ignore me. I'm fine now.'

Jess narrowed her eyes and looked at him. 'Jay, if we're going to have a relationship you need to open up to me. Please let me in, because at the moment I have no idea what I did. You just went all quiet on me when I said I'd seen some of your videos.'

Jason looked at her, wishing she wasn't so bloody perceptive. 'Ok, so I'll ask you a question.'

'Ok. Fire away.'

'How did you feel when you saw me in those videos?'

'And interviews....' she said quietly, thinking again how many things she'd watched. 

'Ok, and interviews,' he rolled his eyes at her and waited for her to reply.

'It was like watching another version of you. You, but in an alternate universe.'

'And did you prefer that version of me?'

'What kind of question is that?' Jess looked at him in confusion, her face colouring as he studied her intently. She took a sip of wine to play for time, before putting it down on the tiled floor next to the sofa. 'It's not the Jason I know. I fancied the hell out of you, but it's not you. You were very funny in the interviews and I saw little glimpses of your vulnerability, but I could also see towards the end you'd lost your sparkle. You'd lost you. So in answer to your question, no I prefer Jason Orange teacher over Jason Orange World famous pop star. It's the person you are now that I want to spend time with and who I like.'

Jason looked at her thoughtfully and put his wine down next to hers on the floor. 'I was thinking maybe you would realise the pop star version was the one you'd prefer, because some of that was a persona for the cameras. I was worried you'd be disappointed when you got to know the real me.'

Jess wrinkled her nose in confusion. 'Jay, but that isn't the real you. Yes, you were gorgeous and sexy and I can see why the women used to scream at you. But I just want to get to know the kind and funny Jay now who treats me and my daughter well. That's the more attractive and sexy one to me. Now do you believe me?' she looked directly at him, so he was under no illusion that she liked him.

Jason nodded in agreement. 'I believe you.' He moved towards her on the sofa and kissed her softly on the lips, before pulling back to look at her and grinning at her. 'So you think I'm sexy do you?' 

'I'm not very good at this business of playing my cards to my chest, am I?

'Well I happen to think you are too, Jess. Sexy and beautiful - especially earlier when you were cutting my hair - you looked hot,' he put his hand out and touched her cheek, his thumb caressing the plane of her cheekbone.

'Ha, you don't mean that!' Jess burst out laughing, thinking he'd well and truly lost the plot. 'Is that a joke?'

'Why would it be a joke?' Jason asked, completely astounded that she thought he was joking until he suddenly realised why, comprehension dawning on him. 'Steve said you weren't?'

Jess blushed and nodded. 'Why do you think he had an affair? He said it was my fault because I'd let myself go.'

'And the bloke is a dick, Jess. When I saw you out with your sister and your friends I wanted you.'

'Really?' Jess looked at him, hardly believing her ears. She felt like all her Christmases had come at once. Her stomach flip-flopped nervously at the thought that he wanted her.

'Yeah, really! He adjusted the cushion behind him on the sofa and made himself more comfortable so that his back rested against the arm. He held his arms out towards Jess and winked, 'are you going to come and sit closer to me seeing as I'm making room for you here?'

Jess picked up her wine glass and shuffled across the sofa to sit in the gap he'd left for her in between his legs. She lay with her back resting against his chest and her thighs in the gap between his. She could feel the gentle thump of his heartbeat through the thin cotton of her jumper as his arms looped under her chest.

'Did you want to watch TV or shall I put some music on?' he asked her, sweeping her hair to one side and planting a soft kiss on her neck.

Jess shivered slightly at the touch of his lips on her skin. Angling her head to look at him, her lips met his as he lifted them from her neck. 'Music please.'

Jason picked up the remote control and aimed it at the stereo. 'Anything in particular you'd like?' he asked softly.

Jess shook her head. 'I'll leave it up to you. I'm enjoying just talking and being with you.'

Jason put on the Coldplay album Parachutes and moved his arm back to where it had been. 'Um Jess, I hope you don't think I'm being presumptuous, but I booked us into a hotel tomorrow night. I know Ruby might not want to stay at Howard's for a sleepover - and that's completely fine. But I wanted to make you feel special and I thought it would be nicer than coming back here. I've booked us into The Samling in Windermere. I booked us a suite and Ruby an interconnecting room, so if she doesn't want to stay over at Howard's we'll be close by, but have some privacy. Is that ok?' he suddenly felt unsure whether he'd done the right thing as she didn't answer straight away. 

Jess's eyes filled inexplicably with tears at his thoughtfulness and she hesitated for a moment as she tried to gather her thoughts. 'Yes, that sounds lovely. I bet you must sometimes wish you'd ended up with someone who doesn't have a child,' she said quietly, her fingertips softly running over his forearms as they hugged her to him.

'No. It doesn't bother me in the slightest. I wouldn't go to all this trouble to sort things out so we can have privacy, but also make sure Ruby is ok if I didn't really like you, Jess.'

'Well thank you,' she turned around in his arms and kissed him, her hands running through his hair as he returned the kiss, his tongue entwining with hers as they kissed passionately.


	28. Chapter 28

Jason's phone rang insistently as it lay on the kitchen worktop. 'Do you think you should answer that? It might be important.' Jess remarked, lifting herself off Jason. They'd been so caught up kissing each other that they had somehow ended up sliding down the sofa cushions and she was by now laying on top of him, with his hands softly resting on either side of her waist where her jumper had ridden up slightly.

'No.' Jason pulled her back down on top of him and began to kiss her again, his mouth then working it's way down along the side of her face and onwards down her neck.

The phone began ringing again and Jess laughed. 'Somebody obviously wants to speak to you.' She lifted herself off him so he could slide out and get the phone and straightened her jumper back down over the waist of her jeans. Watching him wander over to the worktop, she sat up and took a shaky sigh, re-tying her hair up into it's ponytail as it had become loose from where his fingers had been tangling it as they kissed.

Jason picked up the phone and noticed from the caller ID that it was a Howard. 'Hi Doug, what's up?' he asked, using Howard's nickname.

'I realised I forgot to tell you what time to come tomorrow. I've just had a telling off from the missus. Is midday ok and we'll do lunch?'

'Yeah sure. Couldn't you have just put that in a text? You've rung twice!'

Howard hesitated for a minute at Jason's tone. 'Ah, I get it. I've disturbed something, haven't I?Were you just about to get down and dirty?' he chuckled, knowing instantly he'd disturbed something just by Jason's voice.

'No we weren't!' Jason wasn't about to admit anything with Jess sitting there - even if she did look hot as hell with her hair still slightly messy, as she tried to tidy it while she waited for him to get off the phone.

'No, save it for tomorrow night. Jess's daughter will have such a good time with Eloise she'll stay. I'll put money on it.' Howard laughed again. 'Then you can bang each other's brains out all night if you want,' he remarked, knowing Jason couldn't answer him because Jess must be in the room.

Jason coloured slightly as he realised Jess might be able to hear Howard on the phone as he was talking so loud. 'Yeah, alright Dougie. We'll see you tomorrow.'

'I look forward to meeting Jess and seeing you again. I've missed my work husband, so we have a lot to catch up on.'

'I look forward to it. And you behave! I don't want you scaring her off!'

Howard laughed. 'I'm always well behaved,' he then rang off before Jason could answer.

'Everything ok?' Jess asked, noticing Jason looked a bit flustered as he put the phone down.

'Yeah, he forgot to tell me what time. So he was ringing me to say to arrive around midday.'

'What were you telling him off for? I heard you telling him to behave?'

'He has a wicked and very dirty sense of humour. He was just teasing me, because he knows I've booked us a night away tomorrow night.' He refilled their wine glasses and sat back down next to her on the sofa. 'Will you be ok with Ruby staying there if she wants to?'

'If she's happy to, then yes I'm fine with that. It will be nice to be there just the two of us,' she remarked, her stomach fluttering with a mixture of nerves and lust at the thought of it. She looked at him over the rim of her glass, thinking he really was handsome and still couldn't work out what he saw in her.'

Jason visibly jumped as a loud shrink pierced through the quiet of the lounge as he was about to kiss Jess again. 'Is that Ruby?' he asked, as Jess jumped up.

'Yes, a nightmare by the sounds of things. I'll go to her.'

'Are you sure you don't want me to? Why don't you relax and I'll go to her?'

'Are you sure?' Jess asked, feeling unsure as she knew Ruby's nightmares were vivid and upsetting.

'Yes I'm sure. If you want a shower or a bath, feel free.'

Jason disappeared off to Ruby's room while Jess sat back and took a sip of her wine and thought how strange it felt to have someone offer to take a bit of pressure off her. Ten minutes later she tip-toed in the direction of Ruby's room, assuming Ruby would still be in a state of anxiety and tears as it usually took ages to calm her down and convince her that there were no robbers in the house. All she could hear was the low murmur of voices as Jason talked to Ruby and then a tiny giggle from Ruby. She peered through the crack in the door and saw that Jason was sitting on the edge of the bed telling Ruby a story.

She went into Jason's bedroom and hesitated for a moment, unsure what to do. Should she offer to take over so Jason could escape? After all, Ruby wasn't his child and she didn't want him to think she was dumping her child on him. She eventually decided to take his advice and run herself a bath, thinking he wouldn't have suggested it if he hadn't meant it. Sitting on the edge of the bath, she picked up a bottle of White company Seychelles bubble bath and wondered who it belonged to. It seemed a bit strange that it was quite obviously aimed at women and Jason had said he'd not been out with any women for ages. She tried to swallow down a tiny sliver of jealousy and poured a big glug of it into the running bath water.

Jason shut Ruby's bedroom door softly and padded into his bedroom. He could hear the sound of soft music filtering out from the bathroom and the soft swishing sound as Jess lay down in the bath. He noticed she'd left a cream coloured slip nightdress on the bed and wondered whether she had forgotten to take it in the bathroom with her. Picking it up he wandered over to the bathroom door and knocked softly at the door, waiting until he heard her voice. 'Jess, did you leave your nightdress in the bedroom by mistake?'

Jess cast her eyes around the bathroom and realised it wasn't in there with her. 'Um, yeah. Can you bring it in?' she submerged her body under the bubbles as the door opened.

'Are you decent?' Jason asked, unsure whether to bring it in as he hesitated behind the door.

Jess looked over in the direction of the door. 'Yes, I'm under the bubbles. You can bring it in.'

Jason sidled into the room, the nightdress in his hand as he tried to avert his eyes away from her laying in the bath. She had piled her titian coloured hair into a top-knot with tendrils escaping onto her neck, her face was flushed pink from the warmth of the bath water and she looked beautiful as she lay surrounded by bubbles.

Jess smiled up at him as he left the nightdress and stepped back out of the room. She found it extremely cute that considering the amount of women he'd probably seen naked in the past, he hadn't known where to look when he'd walked in the room. She'd been tempted to ask him to get in with her just to see what his reaction would be. 

By the time Jess was finished in the bathroom, Jason was undressed and changed into a pair of dark grey Calvin Klein sleep shorts. 'Was Ruby Ok?'

Jason turned around to look at her as she asked the question. 'Yes, it took her a while to stop shaking and crying, but when I told her not only can I out-row sharks I can knock out robbers if they break in, she calmed down, he chuckled softly as he recalled Ruby's mouth dropping into a big letter "O", as he assured her nobody would get past him. 'She was already dropping back to sleep as I finished reading her the story.'

Jess wandered over to him and looped her arms around his waist, looking up at him from under her eyelashes. 'Thank you. You're her hero I think.'

'Ah, it's nothing. She's a lovely kid. A bit like her beautiful mother is lovely too,' he tipped her chin up with his fore-finger and kissed her. 'You look very sexy in that?' he stepped back, holding her hands in his as he looked her up and down shamelessly. 

Jess stood in front of him and blushed, hardly able to believe he was saying again that he thought she was sexy. She'd bought the satin slip at Victoria's Secret the week before and had been pleased that it accentuated the bits she liked and skimmed over the bits she didn't and it wasn't too skimpy. It ended mid thigh and had lace along the edge of the bodice and along the hem and was held up by spaghetti straps and even though it was a lot of money compared to something sensible from Marks and Spencer, she liked it and felt attractive in it.

Jason hesitated for a moment, not quite sure what to say. On the one hand he wanted to take Jess to bed there and then and slide the nightdress off her body as he kissed her everywhere, but on the other he didn't know whether to wait until the following night when they were more likely to be alone. It wasn't something he'd ever had to concern himself with when he'd always dated women without children.

Jess could see he was worrying about what to do next and she felt in the same quandary. 'Would you mind if we just went to bed tonight? Ruby very rarely has nightmares, but when she does sometimes it's more than once in the same night.'

'Yes, that's fine with me,' Jason nodded, wondering what the hell was wrong with him. He'd never felt this nervous before when he was in the band. He guessed it was because he could click his fingers then and have pretty much any girl he wanted. Apart from his one longer relationship which had broken down to press intrusion when he was in the band, all of his other relationships had been quick flings.

'Ok, well I'll go brush my teeth. Do you mind which side I get in?' she said softly, trying to tear her eyes away from his chest as he shook his head.

Jason got into bed a few minutes later and rolled onto his side, his head propped onto the palm of his hand as he looked at Jess, who was already laying on her side and looked straight at her. 'Thank you for the haircut earlier.'

Jess shuffled closer and ran her fingers lightly through his hair. 'I did a good job, didn't I?'

'Yeah you did. I enjoyed you doing it.'

'Jess moved closer again and put her arms around his neck, looking at him as she did so. 'Jay, who does the bubble bath belong to?'

Jason wrinkled his nose as he tried to work out what she was talking about. 'Sorry, you've lost me... which one?'

'The White company one I used?' Jess asked, her voice small as she realised she sounded like some kind of bunny-boiler.'

'Oh, the one you used? That belongs to my sister Jackie. She sometimes comes with the kids so she leaves it here,' he studied Jess, his lips twitching in amusement as he explained who it belonged to. 'Were you jealous, Jess?' 

'Um yeah. I was a bit. I feel really stupid now.'

'Don't feel stupid. I'm flattered that you were jealous.' Jason folded her in his arms and softly kissed her lips, before kissing his way up her face to kiss the shell of her ear. 'You have no reason to be though,' he whispered against her ear as he reached up and touched her cheek with his fingertips, before trailing them down along the side of her neck, feeling her tremble against him. 'I want you and nobody else, Ok?'

Jess nodded and lay her palm against his cheek as he kissed her again one last time and whispered good night into her ear, before clicking the bedside light off. She lay there for a minute feeling just a bit disappointed that there was a gap between them in the bed, even though they had agreed to wait until the following night.

Jason lay in bed wishing he hadn't switched the light off. 'Jess...' he whispered in the darkness in her direction.

'Yes?' Jess whispered back in his direction, her heartbeat raising a notch.

'Come here.... we might be behaving ourselves tonight, but there's no reason we can't cuddle up to each other.'

Jess moved across the bed and into his arms as he reached out for her in the darkness. He cuddled her to him tightly, as he dropped a kiss on her shoulder and wound his arms around her waist as he lay on his side behind her so they could spoon together.


	29. Chapter 29

Jess woke up as the weak spring sunlight filtered through the gap in the curtains. Jason was fast asleep with his arm slung loosely around her waist as he cuddled up against her. Turning over slowly, so as not to wake him, she lay so she was opposite him and looked at him as he slept on oblivious. Even fast asleep he was beautiful, she thought to herself. His hair was messy from sleeping and his stubble was coming through a little longer than the day before, which softened his strong jawline. She lay studying him in the half light thinking it was no wonder the girls used to scream at him when he sang to them. 

Jason opened his eyes slowly as Jess lay looking at him and smiled sleepily. 'Good morning. Did you sleep ok?'

Jess nodded and smiled back at him. 'I didn't wake up at all. I reckon it was the outside air.'

'Ruby didn't wake up again did she?' he reached across and tucked a stray lock of hair behind her ear.

'No. I think she's still asleep.' Jess turned away from Jason and picked up her mobile phone from the bedside table to check the time. 

'What time is it?' he asked, pulling her into his arms as she turned back to face him.

'Just gone 8am.'

'And when do you reckon Ruby will be awake?' he began to plant butterfly kisses up her neck with his lips.

'I'm surprised she's not awake now. She's usually up pretty early - god knows where she gets all her energy from,' she shivered slightly as Jason's hands went to her waist through the soft material of her slip and she could feel his fingers softly span the curve of her waist, stroking her skin through the satin material.

'Jess, I wish I could see you out of this nightdress...' he murmered, his stubble tickling her ear as he whispered the words into it. His hands moving upwards and brushing against the swell of her breasts through the material, before dropping abruptly away from her as he heard the unmistakable sound of Ruby's bedroom door opening.

'You can tonight,' Jess said teasingly, as she slid out of bed and tried to calm the flutters in her stomach that just the touch of his fingers had given her, as she headed towards the bedroom door.

Jason turned over and surreptitiously admired her legs as she opened the bedroom door to check on Ruby. The more he got to know her, the more he wanted her, he thought to himself.

An hour later they were in the kitchen eating breakfast. 'So, what does Howard have planned for today?' Jess asked, watching as he poured himself a bowl of muesli, which would have looked more suitable to something you'd find on the bottom of a hamster cage.

Jason sprinkled some freeze-dried strawberries on top and sat down next to her at the table. 'I take it you mean apart from lunch?'

Jess nodded and ate a spoonful of her shreddies and fixed Ruby with a quick stare to tell her to stop playing with her dolls and come to the table to eat her own breakfast.

'He was talking about us going to Keswick. There's an extreme outdoor activity company who do a thing called Ghyll scrambling and also lazy tubing. How are you both with water?' he asked, wondering whether Ruby might be just a bit too young for the Ghyll scrambling, which was the activity both he and Howard fancied doing. 

'She's pretty fearless to be honest. Me, on the other hand, I had an accident as a kid in a pool and was fished out by the lifeguard so I'm a bit scared of water - not so much swimming or on the river like yesterday, but rough water.'

Jason looked at her in surprise. He loved water and couldn't imagine being scared of it. He spooned some muesli in his mouth and studied her thoughtfully, before speaking. 'How old were you?'

'Around Ruby's age. We were at a public swimming pool and I couldn't swim. I'd got my rubber ring, but wasn't wearing arm-bands and I somehow fell through it. Danni had mum's attention at the time and she just didn't notice I was gone. It was only when the lifeguard went diving in as he spotted me at the bottom of the pool that she realised.' Jess remarked, her mind going back to the day when it happened

'And you've had a fear of water ever since?' Jason asked gently, so that Ruby couldn't hear them talking.

'Not as bad as I did. Mum straight away enrolled me in swimming lessons and made sure that I was a strong swimmer, so nothing like that would ever happen to meagain. I just get a bit nervous in rough water. But if you and Howard are there I'll be fine. Besides, I'll have Ruby to worry about, so that will give me something else to think about.'

Jason finished his mug of tea and looked at her. 'You will. Don't worry, whichever activity we do the guides are fantastic, and like you say we'll be there too. You'll need to bring a swimming costume to wear under your wet-suits,' he remarked, dropping a kiss on her lips as he got up from the table to put the dishes in the dishwasher.

As they drew up outside the large house which Jason had said Howard was renting on the outskirts of Keswick, Jess felt extremely nervous. She knew Jason and Howard had been especially close before he left the band and she knew getting Howard's approval was important to Jason. 

Howard had seen them draw up and came out of the house to see if they needed any help with their belongings. As soon as Jason was out of the car he grabbed hold of him in a huge bear hug. 'Jeez, Jay! Look at you! You're looking amazing!' his gaze raked him up and down as he took in the small amount of weight he'd put on and how relaxed he looked. He then turned his attention to Jess and Ruby and gave them a re-assuring grin. 'So you must be Jess and you must be Ruby?' he deliberately got the two of them muddled as he pointed at them both, in an attempt to break the ice. 

Ruby giggled. 'No. I'm Ruby and mummy is called Jess,' she clutched her favourite Frozen rucksack to her chest which contained her swimwear, toilet bag, pyjamas and spare clothes.

Howard looked at Ruby with a big smile. 'Ok, Eloise is dying to meet you. Shall we go inside and I'll get our stuff together and then we'll head off?' He led them all inside so Jess could also meet his partner Joanna and their teenage son Finn too.

Jess and Joanna immediately clicked as soon as they met and they were chatting away over coffee in the kitchen within minutes. They discovered that they'd attended the same secondary school and were two years apart. They were already laughing non stop at shared stories and anecdotes about their teachers and school life. Eloise and Ruby had disappeared off to Eloise's bedroom to watch their joint favourite film - Frozen.

As Jason helped Howard load the bags into Howard's people carrier, Howard turned to Jason. 'So, you and Jess.... is it serious?' 

Jason shrugged nonchalantly. 'I'm not sure to be honest. I really like her. I'm attracted to her, but to a certain extent we've tip-toed around taking things further.'

Howard put the last bag in the boot and slammed the door shut before turning to face Jason. 'That's not like you, Jay. Well, not the Jay when you were in the band anyway. You never used to tip-toe around as you put it. If you wanted a woman, you weren't backwards in coming forwards - you were like a man on a mission,' he joked, before his face grew serious again. So what's changed? Where's the Jay who could pull any woman he wanted?'

'Well for a start, women don't throw themselves at me anymore - unless you count some of the mums when I started teaching.' Jason laughed, as he remembered back to the parent and teacher evening in his classroom when Lucas's mum had come onto him. 'Jess made it plain to me at the beginning that she won't be messed around as she has Ruby to think about.'

'Well done her! Start as you mean to go on...' Howard laughed. 'Is that why you're not sure if it's serious? Because she's not behaving like the women you're used to?'

Jason nodded. 'Yeah, I guess so.... I'm not used to a woman who wants to take things slow.'

'Well I happen to think that makes her a bit special, Jay. She's with you for the right reasons. If Ruby ends up staying with us tonight this will hopefully give you both the opportunity to talk about how you feel and what you want. Well, after you've shagged each other senseless, that is!' he patted Jason supportively on the shoulder. 'Just a word of advice - if you really like her then tell her.'

Jason turned and hugged Howard in a bear hug. 'Miss you, Dougie. I miss our chats.'

Howard felt a lump come to his throat. 'Jay, I never went away. You did. I'm always here for you - you know that. Now, stop being a soppy sod and let's have a nice day together.'

Jason nodded his head as it was bent on Howard's shoulder. Thanks Dougie. I appreciate it,' he said, his voice muffled, by Howard's shoulder as they hugged.

An hour later they had arrived at the Ghyll scrambling meeting point. Howard had booked it online that morning once he'd checked Ruby and Eloise were old enough. He had settled on the easiest one as none of them had done it before, once he'd checked with Jason that the three of them were happy to try it.

'Aren't you coming, Joanna?' Jess asked, her gaze turning to Howard's partner as they got out of the car. 'Um, no. I can't do it as I'm expecting another little one.' Joanna patted her stomach softly and looked down to her flat stomach. 'I'm going to drop you all off and then I'll come back later.'

'Oh, congratulations!' Jess said loudly. 'I feel bad leaving you without any company. Would you rather I stayed?' 

'Definitely not. We didn't invite you over so you can hang around the house with me,' Joanna remarked, waving her offer away. 'You go and enjoy yourselves!'

They made their way to the meeting point and Jess took Ruby and Eloise into the changing room with her to get changed, while Jason, Howard and Finn went to the male changing rooms. Once they were changed into their swimsuits they were fitted with wetsuits, bright blue plastic jackets so they could be spotted easily if they fell and helmets and were told to put shorts over the top of the specially designed wetsuits so the backside of the wetsuits didn't get snagged on rocks.

As soon as he set eyes on Jess, Jason burst out laughing at the expression on her face. 'You look seriously hot,' he whispered into her ear so nobody could hear as he took in the strange looking outfit that she was wearing.

'Yeah, right!' she laughed, knowing she looked anything but hot. 'If only those screaming hordes of fans could see you and Howard now,' she teased, their helmets knocking together as she pulled him towards her by the collar of his jacket to kiss him.

They walked the fifteen minute steep walk uphill to the top of the gorge behind the guides. Jess didn't want to admit that she was feeling absolutely scared to death as they made their way up and knew she needed to hide how she was truly feeling or her fear may rub off on Ruby.

The guide stopped and looked at them all, getting them to gather around him. 'So we have a mixture of ghylls for you to experience and lots of them. Most of them are sliding down the naturally formed chutes, so just hang on and enjoy the ride. We then have one nicknamed "the washing machine", he gestured the word with his fingers. 'As you can tell, that one will spin you around and you will be a bit disorientated, but if you feel it's too much it's not one you have to do as it can be by-passed,' he turned to look at his small group. 'So, is anyone not particularly confident in water?'

Jess flushed and put her hand up. 'I can swim. I just have a bit of a fear about going under and not being able to come up.' She felt Jason squeeze her hand supportively as he guessed she'd never voiced her secret fear in front of Ruby.

'Ok, don't worry. We'll explain each section as we get to it and when we reach the section before the scarier one I'll see how you feel about doing it. Is that ok?' the guide raised an eyebrow to check that Jess was ok and smiled at her when she nodded in agreement.

They reached the top of the first ghyll and lined up as the first guide showed them how to slide down with their arms crossed over their chests so they didn't hit anything on the way down. Finn immediately offered to go first, followed by a Howard their laughs echoing in the air as they went down. Ruby and Eloise followed without hesitation which left Jason and Jess to follow.

'Shall I go first and wait for you at the bottom?' Jason suggested, thinking if she had his face to focus on as he waited for her she'd feel less scared. 

Jess nodded in agreement and let him go first, watching as he disappeared down the chute, and heard him laughing as he reached the bottom. Jess hesitated for a moment and looked down, a voice in her head telling her she wasn't going to show herself up and refuse to do it. 

'Jess, I'm here now. Can you see me?' Jason's voice came from down below. She moved closer to the edge and peered over, grinning at him when she saw he was standing waist deep in water holding his arms out ready to catch her if needed. 'It's fantastic fun. Come on!'

Jess took a deep breath and sat down at the top, crossing her arms across her chest and lay on her back in the water, making sure she lifted her head as instructed, so she didn't hit it on a rock as the guide pushed her. She hurtled down the chute, shrieking in a mixture of fear and excitement as adrenaline ran through her. As she reached the bottom, she fell straight into Jason's outstretched arms as she cannoned towards him.

'Oh, my god! That was such fun!' she shrieked loudly, nearly deafening him.

'I knew you'd be fine once you tried it. I'm so proud of you for giving it a go,' he kissed her quickly on the lips before letting her go.

The guide appeared behind them and grinned. 'Well done. You'll be like a professional by the end of this. Come on let's catch the others up!' he gestured with his head in the direction the others had taken before them. 

By the time they were finished two hours later they were thoroughly exhausted. Jess had bravely attempted all of the ghylls, but had drawn the line at the "washing machine" and had watched the rest of them do it from afar, glad that she'd bowed out as it looked terrifying. 

'So, are we ready for lunch now?' Howard looked at them all as they traipsed back to the car once they'd got changed.

They all chorused yes in agreement as the experience had made them starving hungry and made their way back to the house.


	30. Chapter 30

When they arrived back at the house Joanna had already prepared lunch, knowing they would be hungry.

'Howard said Jason is taking you to dinner this evening, so I just made sandwiches and nibbles. I hope that was ok?' Joanna looked at Jess, hoping Howard had been right that they were having dinner later.

Jason interrupted. 'Yes, he's right. I've told the hotel we'll have dinner there tonight.'

Jess raised her eyebrow at him, thinking he was well and truly spoiling her. 'It's a good job I remembered to bring the new dress I bought recently then, isn't it?' she remarked, thinking back to her shopping trip with Ruby the previous week to buy new dresses.

Eloise and Ruby had disappeared out in the garden with their sandwiches and were sitting by the water, their dark heads bent together as they shared a private joke. 'Shall we go outside to eat so we can keep an eye on them both?' Joanna suggested, thinking it would also be an ideal opportunity to have a woman to woman chat with Jess. They picked up their plates and disappeared outside, leaving Howard and Jason to eat in the kitchen.

'So how did you and Jay meet?' Joanna asked, as they sat down opposite each other.

'He's Ruby's teacher,' Jess noticed Joanna's mouth drop open in surprise at her admission. 'We bumped into each other one day at Heaton Park and it started to snow really heavily, so he invited us back to his for tea and to make snowmen in the garden, but the weather turned so bad we ended up staying overnight and I guess one thing led to another.'

'Are teachers allowed to date parents?' Joanna asked, looking confused.

'It's not illegal, but if it becomes more serious, such as we moved in together then he can't teach Ruby.' Jess remarked, as she took a bite of her sandwich, her gaze going over to the water where Eloise and Ruby were getting up to go into the house to play.

'And has it become more serious?' Joanna asked, before continuing. 'Sorry, it's none of my business. Tell me to shut up!'

Jess waved away her apology. 'No, it hasn't gone past kissing. It's harder with Ruby around and I've told him I don't want a procession of boyfriends through my life.'

'And how do you feel about him? - don't worry I won't say a word to anyone!' she assured her.

Jess thought for a few seconds, her teeth chewing her bottom lip as she considered how she felt and how to verbalise it. 'I really like him. He's good with Ruby - she adores him. I fancy him like hell, but I'm not sure if he feels the same as me?'

Joanna grinned dirtily at her. 'Well I'd say booking a romantic child-free evening away means he wants to get to know you better, if you know what I mean?'

Jess nodded. 'Yeah, I guess so. Thankfully Ruby will be leaving his class in a few weeks, so that will make things easier if we continue seeing each other.'

Joanna looked at Jess, almost as if she was weighing up how to say what was on her mind. 'Jess... can I be honest with you? After all, I've known Jay for around fifteen or so years so I guess I know him well.'

Jess's heart thumped uncomfortably in her chest at the thought of what Joanna was about to say. 'Yes, I'd rather you were honest with me.'

Joanna took a breath. 'Ok. Jay is a bit of a free spirit. Of course being a teacher he's had to settle down a bit, but at heart he's still the same Jay. He's not good with commitment - I don't mean that he won't settle down, because after all he was with his ex a while until the press buggered it up. What I mean is don't be a walk-over. Whatever you do don't tell him you love him first. Let him do the chasing. Do you get what I mean?'

Jess nodded thoughtfully. 'He'll feel pushed into a corner if I say it and he's not feeling the same way?'

'Exactly! I've got him well and truly sussed after all these years. Just play it a bit cool. By all means enjoy tonight, just don't be whispering you love him in his ear at the point of no return when you're in bed together,' she chuckled a dirty laugh before continuing. 'Now if he says he loves you that's cool, but don't you be first to say it. Keep your cards close to your chest.'

'Bloody hell you make him out to be some kind of conundrum!' Jess put her sandwich down as she took in everything Joanna was saying. 

'Jess, he is. A bloody lovely one. But he is a conundrum. I'm telling you this because I really like you and I think you're just what Jay needs.'

'Thank you. I appreciate it and I like you too.' Jess smiled at Joanna, thinking how fortuitous it was that they got on or she would never have divulged what she had. She changed the subject and looked at Joanna's still flat stomach. 'How far gone are you?'

'Only twelve weeks, so I'm not really showing. It's our little unexpected surprise.'

'Oh?'

'Well, Finn is thirteen and Eloise is nearly nine. This one wasn't planned, but y'know that's fine. We couldn't be happier,' she stroked her stomach through the soft material of her sweatshirt as she looked down at it with affection.

They continued to make small talk about their childhoods and Joanna told her how she and Howard had met and shared anecdotes about the band in the years after they reformed. Jess was fascinated to hear about Jason as he was when he was in the band and it was obvious that Joanna had a great deal of affection and respect for him.

They were still chatting away like they'd known each other years when Jess looked up as she saw Jason making his way across the lawn towards them. 'Everything ok?' she asked, as he drew level with them.

Jason nodded and grinned at the two of them. 'It's 4pm and we should get off to the hotel. Are you ready to make tracks?'

Jess nodded in response. 'I'd better just speak first to Ruby to check what she wants to do.'

Jason winked cheekily at her. 'Sorted. She's already told me in no uncertain words that she's staying here tonight. Her and Eloise are thick as thieves in there and getting on like a house on fire.'

Jess stood up and fixed him with a grin. 'Yes, I'm ready.'

'Are you ok?' Jason asked, noticing she looked thoughtful as they drove along the narrow country roads leading to Windermere where the hotel was situated. He guessed she was feeling a mixture of worry about leaving Ruby somewhere new and feeling nervous about being alone with him for the night.

'Yes. It seems strange leaving her somewhere she's never stayed before. But I know she'll be alright.'

'She'll be fine Jess. I bet she won't even notice you're gone. I rang the hotel to say she wasn't coming, so they said as they have a suite available they'll upgrade us to that now that we don't need an interconnecting suite,' he moved his hand across to hold hers as it lay in her lap. 'I'm really looking forward to spending time alone together,' he slid a glance across at her and smiled.

'I'm being well and truly spoilt aren't I?' Jess remarked, as she looked outside at the passing scenery. She was feeling extremely flattered that he was going to all this trouble.

'I happen to think you're worth it. You got on well with Howard and Joanna as well as Gary, which means a lot to me, because I want you to get on with my friends.'

'Howard is just so funny and it was certainly strange to meet Joanna and find out we went to school together.' She remarked, thinking what a small world it was.

Half an hour later they drew up into the grounds of the Georgian style country house hotel and were shown to their suite which was set privately in the grounds with panoramic views over the lake in front. The room was set over two floors, with a huge bathroom complete with walk in shower and bath on the ground floor and a comfortable lounge area and then a bedroom on the second floor with a huge picture window overlooking Lake Windermere.

Jess looked around the room in barely disguised glee as the porter closed the door and left them alone. 'I can't believe you booked this place for the night. It's just beautiful!' she exclaimed, thinking she'd never been spoilt like this - even on her wedding night. 

Jason wandered over and looped his arms around her waist, pulling her towards him to kiss her. 'You're welcome. What time shall I book dinner for? Is 7pm ok?' he asked her.

'Yes, 7pm is good for me.' She lay her hands on his forearms and looked up at him. 'Would you mind if I had a bath? I feel sore and bruised from bumping down those chutes earlier. It was great fun, but it's left me aching.

'No of course not.' Jason replied. 'I'll just ring reception and book the table,' he let go of her and went over to the phone to make the call.

Jess headed up the stairs to unpack while Jason rang through to reception. Shaking her new dress to get the creases out, she hoped Jason would like her in it. The hours spent doing Pilates and at the gym had given her the confidence to buy a dress she would never have dreamt of wearing 6 months before.

Jason appeared at the top of the stairs with a champagne flute in each hand. 'I thought you might fancy a glass of champagne in the bath?' he raised an eyebrow at her, hoping she wouldn't mind him opening the bottle which he'd asked the hotel to put in the room.

'Thank you.' Jess remarked as they clinked glasses together and she took a swallow of the cold liquid.

'You go and have a bath and I'll get my things unpacked and I'll have a shower once you're done,' he suggested, as she went to go down the stairs to run her bath.

As Jess lay in the bath amongst the bubbles, she sighed a deep sigh of contentment and pondered on Joanna's words earlier. She knew she was beginning to have deeper feelings for Jason and it did slightly worry her that she might get hurt. At least with the advice she'd been given she knew to keep her feelings to herself until she knew if he felt the same way. She could feel the warmth of the water begin to soothe the kinks and bumps in her back from the Ghyll scrambling as she stretched herself out lazily in the water and sighed again.

Jason looked up from where he sat on the terrace admiring the view of Lake Windermere as Jess emerged from the bathroom, clad in a similar slip to the previous evening, but in midnight blue. It flattered her colouring, he thought to himself as he admired her. 'Are you done?' he asked, as she wandered over and stood next to him to admire the view. He wound his arm around the back of her waist so that his hand rested on her hip and looked up at her.

'Yes. All done. The bathroom is all yours.' She moved around to sit in the chair opposite, as he got up and headed off to have a shower. Taking another sip of champagne, she smiled to herself as she heard the unmistakable sound of the shower being switched on and Jason whistling away as he showered.

'I hope you didn't drink all the champagne!' he called out, as he emerged from the bathroom ten minutes later, towel drying his hair as he emerged in just his sleeping shorts. He went over to the ice bucket and scrutinised the bottle contents, before topping up both of their glasses.

Jess swivelled around in the chair and looked at him, thinking he looked so handsome with his damp, messy hair and newly shaved face, with just the smallest amount of stubble as he walked towards her. Her gaze raked up and down his body as she admired the sight of his well defined, smooth chest, leading to his flat stomach and abs and the dusting of dark hairs disappearing into his shorts.

As he reached her, he put his hand down to hers and pulled her up so she was standing facing him. Jess looked up into his blue eyes, finding she couldn't tear her eyes away from his as he led her inside the lounge and closed the door leading onto the terrace behind him. 'Jess, you are so beautiful...' he murmered under his breath, as his lips met hers in a long kiss and his tongue played softly with hers.

She put her arms around waist and trailed her fingers along the waistband of his shorts as his hands drifted down to cup her bottom through the satin of her night slip as they stood kissing in the lounge.

Jason eventually broke the kiss and grinned sexily at her. 'Do you think we should maybe take this upstairs? It might be a bit more comfortable up there.'

Jess nodded shyly and put her hand in his as he led her upstairs and into the bedroom. She could feel her legs trembling with nerves, even though she wanted nothing more than to go to bed with him. 

As soon as they reached the bedroom Jason resumed kissing her, his hand cradling her neck as she stood with her back pressed up against the bedroom wall. 'I want you, Jess,' he murmered, his lips against hers.

'I want you too,' she whispered, her voice shaking slightly as his lips left her mouth and he began to kiss her neck, his tongue darting across her skin causing her to shiver at the sensation. His forefingers slid under the straps of her slip, as he pushed the straps down over her shoulders. Her eyes fluttered closed as she held her breath expectantly, wondering what he was going to do next as his mouth moved to kiss along her clavicle and downwards, before abruptly stopping.

Moving backwards, he sat down on the bed and took her by the hand so she stood in the gap between his legs. Bending her head downwards as he looked up at her, she placed her hands either side of his cheeks as she kissed him, their eyes gazing at each other as they kissed. His hands drifted down to her thighs under her slip and upwards as he pulled her closer to him, his fingertips stroking her bottom through the lace of her knickers as she continued to kiss him and rake her hands through his hair.

Reaching up, Jason took hold of her slip by its hem and peeled it slowly downwards over the top of her breasts, the soft material sliding over her stomach until it pooled on the floor at her feet and she stood in front of him in just a pair of navy blue Brazilian style knickers, which matched her slip. 'My god, Jess. You are amazing...' he whispered, his mouth going to her breasts one by one as he kissed them. His tongue swirled the bud of her nipple over and over as she groaned softly, her hands tangling in his hair to anchor him there as his hands cupped her breasts.

Moving her knee in the gap between his legs, she pushed him slowly down onto the bed and began to make her way down his body, her lips and tongue touching every spare inch of his skin over his chest and abs until she reached his happy trail and she then drew back, suddenly unsure of herself as she looked downwards to his shorts and could see how much he was enjoying what she was doing.

Jason's head was pressed back into the sheets as Jess made her way back up his body, her hair tickling against his skin as she did so. As her face drew level with his, he wrapped his arms around her and lay her on her back and began to wend his way back down her body, his lips and tongue tracing lazy patterns over her stomach until he reached the top of her knickers. Sliding her knickers off over her hips he continued downwards until he came to a thin silvery scar at the very bottom of her stomach. Stopping, he looked up at her as their eyes met over her stomach. 'Ruby?' he asked gently, instantly guessing what the scar was from. 

Jess propped herself up on her elbows and looked at him. 'Yes, Ruby,' she whispered softly as he kissed softly along her scar as his hands stroked down her hips at the same time. 

'You are beautiful....' he trailed off, his blue eyes gazing down at her body, before his mouth continued it's path downwards to between her legs before she could reply.

Jess's back arched involuntarily as she tried to stifle a loud groan as she felt his mouth and tongue on her, followed by his fingers. 'Oh, my god....' she trailed off, her teeth biting at her bottom lip as he drove her crazy with desire. 'Don't stop. Please don't stop,' she murmered as her hands twisted in his hair as she felt herself tumble into the most mind blowing orgasm she'd ever experienced. 

Jason swiftly removed his shorts, kicking them to one side as Jess sat up and watched him undress in front of her. Her breath caught in her throat as she saw the whole of his body as he moved towards her. Laying back down on top of her, she moved her hands down to touch him, grinning as she felt how much he wanted her as he moved his mouth to her neck, nipping softly at the skin where her neck and shoulder met. 'Jess, I need you,' he gasped into her neck as her hands and fingers drove him to distraction. 

'Need you too,' Jess murmered, her lips against his as she answered him. 

Jason nodded his head in the direction of the bedside table. 'Condoms are in there.'

'We don't need them. I sorted it last week,' she pointed to the top of her hip so he could see the patch there. 'I hope that was ok?' she looked up at him, worried in case he'd think she was presumptuous and was rewarded with a wide grin from him as he shook his head.

Their eyes gazed unflinchingly into each other's as she moved her legs either side of his and he inched slowly into her until their pelvises met. As they began to move together, she wrapped her legs around his waist to draw him closer to her. Tipping her head back in the pillow, he lavished kisses on her upturned lips, silencing her moans as he thrust into her over and over again. 'Jess, let go,' he whispered, his lips against her ear as his teeth nibbled at the shell of it. He felt her body stiffen against him as she let out a long drawn out cry and then the unmistakable tightening around him as she came. The sensation of Jess's climax sent him tumbling over the precipice and his climax joined hers.

He lay on top of her for a few moments, not wanting to let her go as he felt her still trembling in his arms. Dropping a kiss on her lips, he rolled off her and pulled her into his arms to cuddle her to him as she wrapped her arms around his waist. 'Jess, that was bloody amazing,' he sighed, as he rested his chin on the top of her head.

Jess looked up at him through her eyelashes and nodded. 'It was Jay. Thank you.' She nuzzled into his neck and smiled contentedly, thinking things couldn't get any better than they were now.


	31. Chapter 31

Jess gently lifted Jason's arm from around her waist as he slept and slid quietly out of bed. She didn't want to wake him as he looked so peaceful, she thought to herself. She found the knickers she'd been wearing half an hour earlier and slipped them back on, before putting on the matching strapless bra she'd bought to go with them. Retrieving her new dress from the wardrobe, she snapped the Reiss shop label out of it before putting it on.

Jason woke up and lay watching her as she dressed quietly in the half-light. She really was beautiful, he thought to himself as she fastened her bra and then put her dress on. Despite the fact that she'd had Ruby, the only evidence was the scar he'd kissed when they had made love. There were no stretch marks and her skin still had the tautness of someone who took care of their body, he thought to himself as his gaze swept over her.

Jess looked over as she felt his eyes on her and switched the bed-side light on. 'I didn't want to wake you,' she said softly, as she began to deftly plait her hair into a fishtail plait. She wandered over to the bed and dropped a gentle kiss on his lips.

'Come back to bed, Jess.' Jason mumbled, looking at her with puppy dog eyes as he tried to convince her.

'Jay, it's just gone half past six,' Jess remarked, he stomach twisting with lust at the thought that he wanted her again. 'You can have your wicked way with me again later,' she laughed gently as she sat down on the bed next to where he was lying on his side looking at her. She tried valiantly to tear her eyes away from his half naked body as he lay there with the bed covers covering him to just below his navel.

'You look beautiful in that dress,' Jason's fingers plucked at the pleats on the skirt of the dress which was inky blue in colour. 'I look forward to taking it off you later,' he remarked, giving her a heart-stopping grin before pushing the covers back and getting out of bed.

'I look forward to it,' Jess replied, getting up off the bed and rooting around in her make up bag to apply her make up. She surreptitiously eyed him up in the mirror as she put on her mascara as he wandered about with no clothes on behind her, laying his clothes out on the bed before getting dressed.

Twenty minutes later they were both ready. 'Jess, you look stunning. Really sexy,' Jason remarked, looking her up and down. The dress had a pleated skirt which ended just past her knees and the top was made of see through ink blue lace, a strip of the same coloured material underneath the lace covered just her bra, leaving a tantalising glimpse of the skin on her back, above her breasts and flat stomach through the lace. She'd applied light make up to enhance her stunning green eyes and he found himself transfixed as she stood in front of him.

'It's not too tarty is it?' Jess asked timidly. 

'No, Jess. Very elegant, but sexy all at the same time.' Jason cocked his head to one side as he studied her intently.

Walking towards him, Jess reached up to kiss him. 'Jay, you look seriously gorgeous too,' she remarked as she looked at him. He was wearing charcoal grey trousers with a white shirt and light grey waistcoat and the grey in the waistcoat enhanced how blue his eyes were.

'So did you like Ghyll scrambling?' Jason asked her later on as they ate dinner in the restaurant overlooking the lake.

Jess nodded enthusiastically. 'I did. I'll admit when I saw what we'd be doing I was pretty scared. But once I did the first one the adrenaline rush spurred me on to do the others.'

Jason took hold of her hand in his. 'I was so bloody proud of you. You did so well - especially after you told me about your childhood experience of water.'

'I can't quite believe I did it. Though having you there made me forget my fears, Jay,' she looked at him, a mischievous grin crossing her face. 'I did notice your tongue spent more time out of your mouth than in it,' she laughed as she recalled the look of intense concentration on his face as he clamped his tongue between his lips as he watched the instructor explain what to do at the top of each Ghyll and then did the same when he slid down the Ghyll as he was instructed.

'Ah yeah, that.' He chuckled at her and stuck his tongue out at her in response to her teasing. 'I don't even know I do it most of the time. Though I hear I used to have a Facebook page set up by fans which was devoted just to pictures of me and my tongue.'

Jess burst out laughing. 'Is it still on Facebook? I'd love to see that!'

Jason looked at her, innocence written across his face. 'I have no idea as I'm not on social media, but I bet me and my tongue are long forgotten by now.' 

'Not by me they're not.' Jess remarked, looking away from him in embarrassment as she blushed beetroot red at what he'd been doing to her with his tongue less than an hour earlier. She desperately tried to shuffle it to the recesses of her mind as lust spiralled in her stomach again. 

'You're very welcome to a repeat performance,' Jason whispered across the table to her, grinning inwardly as she continued to redden further. 'Do you know your blushing is really sexy?' he murmered at her out of the corner of his mouth.

'Jay, stop it...' Jess trailed off, trying to keep her voice low so nobody else could hear them.

Jason laughed quietly. 'Do you want a drink at the bar? I hear they do good cocktails and it seems a shame to not take advantage of having no Ruby with us, doesn't it?' he asked, changing the subject.

Jess nodded, thinking it made a rare treat to be away from Ruby - even if she loved her to bits. 

As they sat in the bar at the hotel with their drinks, Jess looked at him and took a sip of her drink. 'Does it feel strange when Howard talks about the band and you're no longer part of it?'

Jason chewed on his bottom lip as he thought about what she was asking. 'I did at first. I had FOMO more than anything - fear of missing out, but now they've toured without me and released some singles I'm at peace with it. I watched their TV performances for around a year after I left...y'know Strictly, the X Factor - our usual shows we did every year and it seemed really weird seeing the three of them. I used to sit there and wonder to my self whether they missed me when they performed.' He continued talking as things came to his mind. 'Some of the clothes they wore like the matching suits on X Factor and the leather fringed jackets on the Graham Norton show I wondered what the hell they were thinking when they agreed to wear them. I sent Howard a message when they wore the matching suits and said it was a great performance, but that they should sack their stylist. He just sent me a message telling me to fuck off.' He laughed, as he thought back to the messages which had gone backwards and forwards between them that weekend.

'But you're ok with it now?'

'Yeah I am. Being a teacher keeps me busy and I like hearing about what they're up to when I see them. I don't miss it any more. And the plus side is that I can now get on with my day to day life without being disturbed.' He drained his whiskey and looked her straight in the eye. 'I probably wouldn't have met you if I'd still been in the band either.'

Jess smiled at him, thinking how different things would have been for them both if he'd stayed in the band. 'And even if by chance we had met we wouldn't be enjoying this break without being disturbed by fans?'

'Exactly. Can you imagine when we went in the canoe the other day to that cafe? I'd have had people stop and ask for photos and autographs and people would be pointing and you'd have been getting nasty looks. I felt like I was in a zoo sometimes.' Jason put his empty glass down on the table and winked at her. 'Are you ready to go to bed? I've had enough talking about my past.'

Jess nodded and took hold of his outstretched hand as he stood up and waited for her to drain her drink.

As they walked back to the room, Jess heard her phone ping, notifying her that she'd received a text. Letting go of Jason's hand she pulled her mobile phone from her handbag and keyed in her password to read the message. 

'Everything ok?' Jason asked, as she stopped walking to swiftly type out a reply, pressed send and then slipped her phone back in her bag.

'Yeah, it was from Joanna. We exchanged phone numbers and Ruby just sent me a text telling me she loved me and was off to bed on Joanna's phone.' Jess replied, winding her arms around Jason's waist and lifting her face up as he bent down to kiss her.

'I think she had the time of her life today, didn't she?' Jason remarked, winding his arm around her shoulders as they began to walk again.

'Yes, she did. Thanks so much. It's a shame her dad doesn't really want to do things like that with her.'

'Was he always like that - y'know not bothered about her?'

'He was really good with her at first. We'd been married about a year when she came along. Ruby was delivered by emergency c-section because her heart rate dropped suddenly. So Steve saw her before me and I didn't get to see her until I came round from the anaesthetic. He was fantastic for the first three years of her life and he doted on her. It was when he had the affair with Cheryl and then left me that he changed. At first Ruby couldn't understand why her dad had left and didn't come back. But the longer he's been away and the more he's let her down she's sort of become accepting of it.' Jess said, her tone sad as she talked about her daughter.

'I sort of got that feeling yesterday night when she asked me if he still loved her,' Jason remarked, his mouth twisting with distaste as he thought back to their conversation and how much he disliked the sound of Steve. 'She accepted my explanation that he had Cheryl and the baby to think about, almost like she sort of knows he's not the best dad in the world.'

Jess snorted in derision. 'You can say that again. He's never going to win a father of the year award, that's for sure. Thank you for speaking to her last night.' 

'You're welcome! Like I've said before, she's a good kid and doesn't deserve a father like that.' Jason remarked, as they reached their room. 

Jess slipped her heels off as soon as they got in the room and looked around at Jason, a playful look on her face. 'So is that offer of a repeat performance still on offer?'

'Of course!' Jason replied without any hesitation. 'Do you need to even ask that question?' his mouth was instantly on hers, as he captured her against the closed door and began to kiss her hard, his hands roaming over the lace at the back of her dress.

Jess shivered at the feeling of his fingertips skittering across the lace at the back of her dress, before fumbling at the zip. Her hands immediately went to his waistcoat buttons as she began to quickly undo them, followed by his shirt buttons as they continued to kiss each other.

Jason shrugged his shirt off as Jess reached the last button and then he swiftly yanked her unfastened dress off. She immediately began kissing over his chest and downwards, her hand firmly on his waist as she reached the waistband of his trousers, popping the button with her one free hand. Jason pulled at the zip of his trousers to get them off quicker and pulled off his shoes and socks as Jess's hands pulled them down, along with his underwear. She dropped onto her knees and immediately took him in her mouth, smiling inwardly to herself as she heard the expletives drop from his lips as he felt her tongue on him as well as her hands. 

'Jess, stand up. I want to be inside you now.' Jason groaned a few minutes later as she continued to drive him crazy.

Jess stood up so that she could look at him in the eye. She reached around and undid her bra, dropping it on the floor as he pushed her knickers down, his fingers immediately inside her as she wrapped her arms around his neck to bring their lips together. His stubble scraped against her face as his mouth left hers and he rained kisses on her neck as his fingers brought her to the brink and she tumbled into oblivion. Unable to wait any longer, he lifted her into his arms as she wound her legs tightly around his waist and moved so that he had her pressed against the wall. Jess's fingers dug into his shoulders as he slammed into her and she found she couldn't tear her eyes from his face as his eyes bored into hers, his tongue clamped between his teeth as he concentrated on what he was doing.

'Jesus Christ...' Jess trailed off as her back jarred against the wall and she felt her orgasm build as he thrust hard into her. 'Harder Jay..' she whispered, the whisper turning to a guttural groan as he did what she asked.

As he felt the rush as she came, all control was forgotten as he let go too, his voice crying out her name at the same time.

Dropping her onto her bare feet, he grinned at her and dropped a kiss on her mouth. 'I reckon I'm getting too old to be doing it like that.'

Jess began picking up her clothes and looked up at him cheekily once they were all in her arms. 'Well, best we'd get to bed so you can some beauty sleep. Seeing as you're older than me you'll need it!' she dodged out the way and shrieked as he went to swat her on the backside.

'We're going to have to behave ourselves when Ruby comes back,' Jason remarked, as they lay in bed later. Jess had her arm around his waist and was laying sideways with her head nestled against his shoulder. 

'Well we certainly can't be doing what we did tonight and we'll have to be dressed in bed.' Jess remarked, thinking the last time she'd cuddled up naked with someone was when she was married to Steve. 

'And you'll have keep the noise down too,' Jason teased as he kissed her on the forehead and ran his fingers through her hair which hung down over her shoulder in waves, from where it had been plaited earlier.

'You'll have to put your hand over my mouth,' Jess joked as she looked up at him and ran her fingertips over his stubble,'

'I might just do that,' he leant over and snapped the bedside light off, dropping a kiss on her lips as he did so.

Jess lay with her arms still wrapped around him, thinking about what had taken place that day. From the day out with Ruby, meeting Howard and his family and then the evening they'd spent together. She could hear the faint pitter patter of his heartbeat, which slowed as he fell asleep. As she lay there, she recalled what Joanna had said about keeping her feelings to herself and was grateful she had or she knew her innermost feelings would have come spilling out half an hour or so earlier. She loved him and knew unless she wanted to risk losing him, she needed to keep quiet.


	32. Chapter 32

Jess was woken up by her mobile phone ringing the next morning. Jason was still fast asleep, so she hurriedly got out of bed and slipped her nightdress on, before heading down the stairs to take the call. She smiled as she saw it was Joanna's number and guessed it was probably Ruby.

'Hi,' she said quietly down the phone, not wanting to wake Jason up.

'Hi mummy, it's Ruby.'

'Hi, my darling how are you?' Jess sat down on the edge of the sofa, a smile on her face as she heard Ruby's voice.

'I had such a good time last night. Eloise's dad allowed us to listen to his DJ set and then afterwards he let us have a go at being DJ when he logged off Instagram.' Ruby answered, her words tripping over themselves in excitement as she described their evening.

'That sounds like fun, Rubes. I bet you were a very good DJ too,' Jess smiled down the phone as she imagined Ruby with Howard's earphones on her head.

'It was. Eloise said I can stay over again tonight, but Joanna said I have to check if it's ok with you. Is it ok mummy?' Jess could hear the pleading tone in Ruby's voice and was pleased to hear her sound so happy.

'If you'd like to stay, then of course it's ok with me. Can I speak to Joanna before you go? Love you Ruby and we'll pick you up tomorrow.' Jess replied, hoping it would be ok with Jason and that he hadn't planned something already for them all.

'Love you too!' the phone clattered at the other end, as Ruby put the phone down and went to fetch Joanna.

Thirty seconds passed and Joanna came on the line. 'Hi Jess. Everything ok?'

'Yes, thanks for having Ruby last night. I understand she wants to stay tonight. Are you sure that's ok with you?'

'Yes of course! She's had a fantastic time. Besides, it'll give you and Jay more time together. Or are you already bored of each other?' she teased, almost certain they'd be grateful of more time together. 

'No, I love spending time with him, Joanna.'

'Can you still walk?' Joanna chuckled dirtily down the phone.

Jess laughed in response to Joanna's question. 'Yes. Just about....We'll pick her up tomorrow morning if that's ok?'

'Yes, it's fine. Make sure you take advantage of being alone, Jess,'

Jess laughed and rolled her eyes. 'Don't worry. I will!' She looked up as she saw Jason walking down the stairs in his sleep shorts, his hair sticking out at odd angles and with still sleepy eyes and smiled at him, mouthing good morning as she did so. 'Gotta go Joanna, Jason is awake.' She rang off as he came over to her and kissed her on top of the head.

'Ruby?'

Jess nodded. 'Yes. She was asking if she can stay another night. It seems Howard has turned her into a budding DJ by the sounds of things.'

Jason laughed and attempted to flatten his hair with his hand. 'She'd probably make a good one for Radio 1 considering how much she talks,' he said, referring to how much talking there was between songs on that particular radio station.

'Did you have anything planned for today?' Jess looked up at him worriedly, hoping he'd be ok with Ruby staying away.

'Just to an outside forest area with ropes and swings. So nothing major. I figured she'd be tired after yesterday,' he remarked, fixing Jess with a cheeky grin. 'So does that mean we get to stay all day in bed together so I can learn what makes you scream?' 

Jess laughed in response and felt her stomach turn over at the thought. 'If you want. Though I was under the impression you'd brought us to the Lake District so we could see some scenery? Much as I love your naked body I'd like to see some outside scenery too,' she teased.

Jason sat down next to her on the sofa and pulled her onto his lap to cuddle her to him. 'Ok. Spoilsport. How about I take you up to the Cat bells which overlooks Derwent Water? It's really pretty, so you can get some photos and even though it's fairly high it's an easy enough walk and you can see for miles. You did remember your walking boots, didn't you?'

Jess nodded. She looked at her watch and saw it was 8am. 'I guess we'd better go and get some breakfast so that we have the energy to walk up there.' She stood up and put her phone on the coffee table and turned back towards the stairs.

'Would you like me to see if this room is available for tonight or would you rather we go back to mine?'

'I'm more than happy to go back to yours Jay. It seems silly to spend more money when we'll have the house to ourselves anyway. As long as you're happy?' Jess raised her eyebrow in question.

'Ok. We'll go have breakfast and then get packed up and be on our way.' Jason said decisively. 

An hour and a half later they were parked up in Keswick and walked down to the ferry which would take them to Hawes End to start the walk. The sky was a vivid shade of blue with very few clouds and was the perfect day to go on a walk, so there were a few other people also on the ferry. Jason slid his favourite sunglasses over his eyes and pulled his hat on as he saw a couple of women look at him in curiosity as they tried to work out if it was him. He leant back with his back against the side of the ferry and looped his arms loosely around Jess's middle as they looked out over the water as it rushed past over the other side of the boat. Burying his nose in her hair, he smelt the familiar scent of her Gucci Bloom perfume as he kissed her neck. He smiled to himself as he felt Jess shiver slightly as his stubble brushed against her and loved that she couldn't hide the effect he had on her.

Pulling up at the landing stage, they got off the ferry first and Jason took hold of Jess's hand in his as they began to stroll along the path which skirted along the lakeshore for a while, until they reached a path which zig-zagged sharply uphill into the distance. 'We go this way. Be careful as this gets slippery, but I'll help you if you need me to,' Jason remarked, as their walking boots crunched on the gravel path. Jess nodded and shot him a grateful glance as they continued to walk. 

Just over an hour later they had walked the main path which ran around Skelgill Bank and both Jess and Jason were breathing hard from the exertion of walking up the steep path. 'How is your hand?' Jason asked, lifting her slightly swollen hand covered in a few scrapes and inspecting it. 'I'm really sorry, I didn't catch you in time when you tripped.'

'Ah, I'll live. I should have been looking where I was going.' Jess replied as she referred to the fall she'd taken further down the hill, as she'd been busy admiring the scenery and managed to fall over. 'It's just really sore.'

'We'll get it cleaned up properly when we get back home. I've got a first aid kit there too.' He took her other hand in his as they reached the summit of Cat bells and grinned as her mouth dropped in surprise as she saw the beauty of the landscape stretching out ahead of her. The deep Sapphire blue coloured Derwentwater lay below stretching into the distance, surrounded by brown and green peaks. 

Jess sat down on a large rock and contemplated the beauty in front of her as she reached into her jacket pocket and retrieved her mobile phone. She began to take photos and then stood up and wandered over to the other side and took yet more photos of the flat plain of the Newlands valley and Western fells as Jason sat down on the rock. He handed her a bottle of water once she'd finished taking photos and sat back down next to him. Looping his arm around her neck he planted a kiss on her ear and breathed deeply in contentment at the complete silence. Jess held the phone up in front of them and grinned. 'How about a selfie?'

'Ah, you know I hate having my photo taken now, but as it's you I will,' he agreed, pressing his cheek against hers and grinning as she took the photo. She swiftly inspected the photos and took a grateful swallow of the cold water as she checked they were all in focus.

'So, do you want to go out for dinner tonight or would you like me to cook?' Jason asked in Jess's direction as he leant back with his arms stretched out behind him and warmed his face with the sun's spring rays.

Jess thought for a few seconds before answering. 'I'd really like it if you cooked. It will be nice just to have peace and quiet. Is that ok with you?' she slid a glance across at Jason as he sat beside her, his eyes shielded by his sunglasses.

'I kind of like that idea too,' he said softly and took another deep breath of fresh air. He opened his eyes and looked at her. 'Are you ready to go back down?'

Jess nodded and stood up, taking a swallow of her water and then running a stream of it over her cuts, just as Jason had done further down the hill when she fell. She winced as the cold water hit the cuts and grazes on her knuckles and fingers and then slipped the water bottle into her jacket pocket alongside her phone.

They made their way carefully downhill towards Hawes Gate. This walk was easier and less slippery than the walk up and they were surrounded by greenery overlooking the water and continued along past rows of conifers until they reached the main terrace path, the walk hugging along a stone wall until the were back along the lakeshore of Brandelhow Bay. They walked past a disused mine, before walking through the woods which lined Brandelhow Bay and past the jetty until they reached Hawes End from where they had set off from.

The wind whipped Jess's hair around as the ferry took them back to Keswick. The weather looked like it was possibly taking a turn for the worst as more clouds filled the sky, though the sun still shone and she was glad they had gone up the mountain in the morning. 

Jason smoothed Jess's hair down with his hand as it rested along her shoulder. 'Are you hungry? If you are we can stop somewhere in Keswick before I drive us home?'

Jess shook her head. 'No, but I'd love a cup of tea.'

'Ok, I know just the place.' Jason suggested, thinking they could stop off at the same time at the local supermarket to buy ingredients for dinner. 

As they sat at a cafe overlooking the water a little later on he fixed her with a grin. 'So, you've been two days out of your comfort zone. Have you or Ruby ever been quad biking?'

'No.' Jess shook her head, thinking it sounded like fun.

'Do you think Ruby would like to try it?' Jason asked, worrying slightly that Ruby would want to do something more gentle.

'She'll be in her element, Jay. Thank you for thinking about what will make her happy. I really appreciate it.'

Jason looked directly at her and smiled. 'It's no problem. I enjoy spending time with you both,' he leant forward and tucked a stray hair behind her ear before taking her hand, his eyes suddenly widening as he spotted Lucas's mum who had made a pass at him during parents evening coming out of the shop next door. Her gaze settled on them both one by one as she realised that if she wasn't mistaken it was her son's teacher and Ruby's mum looking very cosy. A smirk crossed her face as she looked again, just to be sure she was right as Jason dropped Jess's hand quickly.

'Everything ok?' Jess asked as she saw the wary expression flit across Jason's face.

'I take it nobody with kids in my class apart from Danni knows we're seeing each other, do they?' he asked, as she walked off in the opposite direction.

'No, I haven't told a soul. Why?'

'Things could get interesting when we go back to school after Easter. Lucas's mum has just spotted us together and I was holding your hand.’


	33. Chapter 33

They stopped on the way back to Jason's house to buy ingredients for the Sri Lankan Curry which he said he was going to make. He'd spent three weeks there when the band had split up doing all the tourist sights such as Sigiriya fortress, the Dambulla caves, the tea plantations near Kandy and volunteered at the turtle hatchery. While he was there he'd made a point in taking some cookery classes and had enjoyed learning to cook food he'd never tried before and was keen to see if Jess liked Sri Lankan food.

'Do you want a hand with dinner?' Jess asked, as they got back to Jason's house.

'No, you relax. I'll make a start on it a bit later. Unless you're hungry now?' he slid a glance across at her over the roof of the car to check if she was.

Jess shook her head. 'No. I'm happy to wait a couple of hours. Would I be able to have a bath? I really fancy one after the walk today - my legs are aching?' her thoughts turning to the large bath in Jason's en-suite.

'Is there room for me too?' he asked, raising his eyebrow at her naughtily over his shoulder as they entered the house.

Jess pretended to think for a moment. 'Ooh, I guess so,' she replied, winking cheekily at him and beginning to remove her walking boots one by one.

'Well I'll go put the food in the fridge and you run the bath and I'll be with you in a minute,' he remarked as he headed towards the kitchen with the bags.

As Jess lay back in the water she let out a deep sigh of contentment, thinking how much she was enjoying being in Jason's company. She loved how easy things were between the two of them and wondered whether his strange mood the day they arrived was just a blip when he knew she'd seen his concerts on YouTube, because there hadn't been any sign of it since. 

There was a small whoosh of air as Jason appeared in the room and began to swiftly undress in front of her. Jess lay back in the bath watching him as he undressed, thinking how gorgeous he was. She still couldn't quite believe that he was interested in her. She wished she had the easy confidence he had, as he threw the clothes on the floor without a hint of embarrassment that she was watching him - in fact, he seemed to quite like the fact that she was openly staring at him. 

'So are you having a nice time?' he asked her, as he slid down into the bath behind her, his long legs lying down alongside hers and capturing her there between his thighs.

Jess nodded as she felt him kiss her on the neck, his mouth then moving up to nibble on her ear lobe. 'But Lucas's mum spotting us today could cause a few problems. Don't you think?' she angled her head so she could look at him.

Jason looked at her in confusion. 'Why? We're not doing anything wrong are we?'

'Yeah, but she's bound to tell everyone,' Jess said, her tone slightly sharp as she thought it was Ok for him - he'd be in the classroom and probably wouldn't know what was going on outside. It would be her that everyone was gossiping and pointing at if Lucas's mum blabbed to all and sundry about seeing them together in Keswick.

'And that's a problem, because?' Jason asked, ignoring her tone as he continued to distract her by nipping and licking her earlobe, knowing she was sensitive there. As far as he was concerned it wasn't like they were getting married or moving in together, he thought to himself.

'I'm going to be the talk of the school. That's why. Everyone's going to wonder if Ruby will get preferential treatment by you and knowing Annie she's the type to say something nasty.'

'Tell her to mind her own fucking business.' Jason said simply. He started to laugh softly as he thought back to the night where not only Annie had made a pass at him, but where he'd also first set eyes on Jess. 'She asked me out the night I first met you, y'know at Parents evening. I told her I don't date parents, so not doubt she will say something, because as it turns out I'm seeing you. You've just got to think of something to shut her up and close her down. And much as I like you and Ruby, Ruby won't be treated any differently to any of the other kids. Ok?'

'I didn't know she made a pass at you! What did you say?' Jess tried to ignore the feeling of Jason softly kissing her neck. It felt amazing and was doing strange things to her body, but she was all ears to his admission.

'Oh god, she was so obvious! She suggested we go down the pub to discuss him and when I went to the loo to get away from her for a minute I really thought she might follow me in there and offer to give me a hand. I hated having security when I was in the band, but at that moment I felt like I really needed some,' he stopped kissing her neck as he recounted what had taken place on the night in question.

Jess was by now laughing her head off at Jason describing how he'd disappeared off to hide in the toilet in a bid to escape Lucas's mum. 'It's a good job I didn't do the same then and make a pass at you too.'

'I'd have thought there was something going on with the water if you had too. Believe me Jess, you're too classy to behave like that,' he dropped a kiss on her bare shoulder as his hands swept upwards and began to cup her breasts from underneath. Sweeping a thumb over each nipple, he heard her breath hitch in her throat as they involuntarily hardened against his thumbs. He kissed her on the shell of her ear and began to nibble at it as one hand disappeared under the water and his fingers tiptoed up her thigh to between her legs.'That's enough about Lucas's mum I've got other things I'd rather be doing with you,' he said decisively as she moaned softly at the touch of his fingers as they continued downwards.

It was 7pm when Jess woke up with a start. The room was in darkness and the bed was empty. She guessed Jason had made a start on dinner as she could hear soft music coming from the kitchen and the unmistakable smell of food cooking. Her stomach growled loudly and she realised how hungry she was. Slipping her short nightdress on, she padded into the kitchen in her bare feet and smiled when she saw him busy in a world of his own as he cooked. Wandering over, she wrapped her arms around his waist and gently kissed him on the shoulder blade.

'Ah, you're up then?' he joked, his eyebrow raised at her as he turned around and looked at her. 'You looked so peaceful I didn't want to wake you up.'

'It's your fault for knackering me out!' she remarked, her mind wandering back to them making love in the bath, her astride him as they slipped and slid around as they tried to avoid knocking themselves out on the taps. 

'Ah, but we've had a good time eh, Jess?' he winked naughtily at her, turning her insides to mush at the look he was giving her.

'Yes, a very good time. Something smells nice,' she replied changing the subject before she was tempted to drag him back to bed, as she took an appreciative smell of his cooking. She was starting to wonder what the hell was happening to her. Considering their relationship had started off slowly, it had certainly stepped up a gear that weekend and they couldn't keep their hands off each other.'

As they ate dinner half an hour later Jess looked at him after she'd taken a few bites.'This is seriously good, Jay.'

'I'm a man of many talents,' he teased, chuckling as she blushed. 'Talking of which, I rang the quad-biking company and they're closed tomorrow as it's Easter Sunday. So I hope it's ok that I booked it for Easter Monday? I thought it would be a nice way for us to finish the weekend. What do you think?'

'I love the sound of that!'

'I have a surprise for Ruby tomorrow morning.' Jason remarked, a secretive smile crossing his face as he ate a forkful of dinner.

'And do I get to know what it is?'

'Nope. I assume you brought her Easter egg with you?' he waited for her to nod, before continuing. 'If you give me it I'll do the rest.'

Jess's voice rose an octave as she replied to him. 'Don't I get to know what you're up to?'

'No.' Jason replied simply, refusing to divulge what he had planned for after they had picked Ruby up from Howard's house. 'Shall I book us a table somewhere for lunch tomorrow?' he asked, steering the conversation expertly away from his plans for the morning, before he gave away more than he wanted to. He really hoped Ruby would be pleased, as he'd had to enlist help to make it possible from both his house-keeper Greta and one of his ex band-mates.

Jess studied him intently, trying to work out what he was up to, but his face was giving nothing away. 'Yes, that would be lovely,' she eventually replied, flashing a smile at him.

Later on, as they sat in the garden enjoying the last of the sun's spring rays, Jess looked at Jason in mischief. 'So, don't get all funny on me will you? I have a question...'

Jason took a sip of his mint tea and raised his eyebrow. 'I'm assuming this is about my past life if you're saying not to get funny? What do you want to know?' his mouth twitched in amusement as he waited to hear her question.

'Can you still break-dance?'

He burst out laughing at her question. 'I was expecting something like how many women had I slept with?' he exhaled in relief, as he realised her question was going to be a lot easier to answer.

'It's something I try not to think about, to be honest - the women, I mean. If I think too much about it it fucks with my head, Jay,' she replied honestly.

Jason looked at her over the top of his mug. 'The honest answer is I haven't break-danced since Progress. I loved doing it on the tour, but my back was completely buggered afterwards,' a wave of nostalgia swept over him as he thought back to the tour and he wished he'd continued break dancing once his back had recovered. 'Did you like watching me break dance then?' he teased, knowing that she had by the way she blushed when he asked the question.

'Yes I did.' Jess admitted, thinking his dance off to Kidz was seriously hot. 'Though I saw you did the Tango on the Ultimate tour. I'd love to be able to dance like that,' she replied, as her mind wandered to seeing it on the DVD she'd bought. Her curiosity as been piqued once she'd found out more about him as she looked on YouTube. Some of the video quality wasn't great on YouTube so she'd bought a couple of the tours on DVD to see the concerts better.

'Would you?' Jason grinned widely at her. 'Well maybe one day I'll teach you.' He then fixed her with a look. 'Y'know it shouldn't fuck with your head, Jess,' he said softly as he reached across and took hold of her hand in his. 'I'm not that person anymore.'

'That may be true, Jay. But I have a kid and I'm fairly normal and boring compared to the girls you used to go for.'

Jason looked at her, feeling slightly confused at what she was saying. 'But my life is different now. I know Ruby is part of going out with you and I'm fine with that. I happen to think you're beautiful and that's all that matters. Besides, can you imagine some of those girls I used to see going Ghyll scrambling and wearing the outfit they kitted you out in and not worrying about getting their hair wet?'

Jess shook her head slowly as she listened to his explanation, thinking that the glamorous girls she'd seen on his arm in photos probably wouldn't have gone anywhere near the water and maybe she needed to lighten up and stop worrying.

Standing up, Jason put his hand out for Jess to take. 'Come on, would you like your first dance lesson now?'


	34. Chapter 34

‘So, are you going to tell me this morning what you're up to?' Jess asked, early the following morning as they sat eating breakfast.

'Well I do need you to give me a hand. So ok, I'll tell you what I have planned. I'm going to get Ruby to hunt for her Easter Eggs, so you can help me to hide them before we go fetch her,' Jason admitted, still hiding the full extent of what he had planned.

'Aww, she'll love that!' Jess remarked, thinking how excited Ruby would be when she found out about her surprise. 'I'll just go and get my egg and also the ones which my mum and Danni gave me. I also got one pretending it was from her dad.' She disappeared off to find them, before reappearing a few minutes later with four boxes and handing them to Jason.

'What the hell is this one?' Jason asked, turning one over in a lurid pink box and scrutinising it.

'Percy Pig. You've obviously led a charmed life if you've never heard of Percy Pig. It's Ruby's favourite and they make packets of Percy sweets too.' Jess replied with a laugh.

'But Percy is naked!' Jason laughed as he looked at the bright pink pig, with multi coloured hundreds and thousands stuck to the chocolate towards the bottom of it's body. Judging by the colour of it it's full of E numbers - she'll be bouncing off the bloody walls!' he shook his head as he read the front of the box. 'Whatever kind of chocolate is it?'

'Oh Jay, Percy has trousers on - that's what the multi coloured strands represent.' Jess pointed at it and tried to stifle her laughter at his consternation that she'd bought an X rated egg for Ruby. 'It's white chocolate and they make the pink colour and strawberry flavouring from real strawberries. Come on... surely as a kid you had Pink Panther bars. This is the same, but with less additives.'

'Jason shook his head. No, I never ate them - we were very short of money when I was a kid, so chocolate was a real luxury. Strawberry flavoured chocolate sounds bloody awful, but if that's what she likes...'

'Oh god, you'll be disappointed in me then as I like it too.' Jess confessed, laughing at his disgusted expression at her admitting she liked it too.

'Well at least it'll be cheap if I ever want to buy you chocolates. I'll head into Marks and Spencer and buy you this cheap crap!' he waved the box at her, before disappearing with it and the other three boxes and a wicker basket containing more eggs he'd bought into the garden, where they began to hide the eggs following the pictures on a map he'd drawn.

Drawing up an hour later outside Howard and Joanna's house, they were greeted by Howard who had seen them driving towards the house. 'Ruby is just fetching her things if you want to go in Jess,' he kissed her on the cheek and waved her into the house, before fixing Jason with a wicked grin. 'So did you surface at all from the bedroom this weekend in your quest to wear it off?'

Jason grinned back. 'A gentleman never tells, Dougie and I'm not about to start telling you what we did.'

'She's keen on you, Jay.'

'Ah, it's a bit of fun, Dougie. Yeah, she's my girlfriend, but we just like hanging out together. She's not madly in love with me if that's what you mean? And I'm not in love with her and I've given her no indication to her to think otherwise.' Jason replied, his tone short as he opened the boot for Ruby to put her belongings into when she came out.

'Ok. Well you're both grown ups Jay.' Howard replied, shrugging as if to say it wasn't his problem whether it was serious or not. 'I'm just saying how I see it.'

Jason grinned widely as he saw Ruby come out of the house, her rucksack clutched to her chest as she ran towards him and threw her arms around his waist unthinkingly. 'Hi Jay! Mummy says you have a surprise planned for me!' He momentarily hesitated, his hands hovering above her head, unsure how to react as Ruby hugged him tightly round the waist, before dropping them down to stroke her head.

Howard's eyes grew round as he looked at Jason standing there with Ruby cuddling him tightly and he raised his eyebrows at him as if to reinforce what he'd been saying about Jess liking him - except it looked like it wasn't only Jess who liked him judging by how pleased Ruby was to see him.

Ignoring the expression on Howard's face, Jason stroked Ruby's head, before taking the rucksack from her as she let him go and putting it in the boot. 'Yes I have arranged a surprise for you for when you get home,' Jason replied, answering her question.

'What is it?' Ruby asked, nearly trembling with excitement as she looked at Jason.

'Well if I told you it wouldn't be a surprise, would it?' Jason teased, opening the car door so she could get in while they waited for Jess.

As they made their way back to Jason's house, Ruby talked excitedly about her time spent at Howard and Joanna's house, hardly pausing for breath as she described Howard showing her how to DJ.

Jess slid a glance across at Jason, noticing he was deep in thought as he navigated the winding roads leading back to the house. She could see his teeth gnawing at his bottom lip as he thought about whatever it was that was bothering him. 'Jay, is everything ok?' she asked hesitantly, as Ruby paused for breath in the back.

Jason continued driving, deep in thought as he wondered whether Howard was right and that Jess was falling in love with him. He also recalled Ruby throwing her arms around him and the wave of affection which had gone through him when she did - even though he'd been taken aback at the time. His thoughts were interrupted by Jess's voice a second time as she repeated her question, as she asked if he was ok again. 'Um, yeah. Why wouldn't I be? I was just thinking about Ruby's surprise,' he replied, feeling bad for lying to her. How could he admit to her that he was feeling confused by how he felt? He'd never really been in love - even when he was with Ruth he loved her, but he wasn't IN LOVE with her. Despite saying to Gary that he wanted to leave the band so he could be in a proper relationship when he left. Now that it was a reality and he was beginning to have feelings for Jess, he felt totally confused and scared to just let go and jump in feet first in case he got hurt or in case he hurt her. He cursed himself that he was now having second thoughts about having a relationship with her.

Drawing up at the house, he switched the engine off and looked across at Jess. 'Sorry, I was miles away.'

Jess smiled at him. 'Don't worry about it. So what happens next - y'know Ruby's surprise?'

'Ah, yeah. Wait in the lounge and I reckon I'll be around ten minutes.'

Jess sat in the lounge, her interest piqued as to what he was up to. Ruby could hardly contain her excitement, even though she had no idea what was going on and was chattering away again for all she was worth.

Just over ten minutes later, the lounge door opened and Jess burst out laughing at the truly comical sight standing in front of them. Her hand flew to her chest as she shrieked with laughter at the sight of him dressed up in a complete Easter Bunny outfit from top to toe. He had dark green checked trousers which ended mid calf and were met by red and white striped socks, a brown waistcoat, a made up face complete with teeth and huge white bunny ears, half flopping over his face as he moved his head as he tried to stifle a laugh at the thought of how ridiculous he probably looked.

Ruby let out a squeal of shocked surprise at first and then started to giggle in relief when she realised it was Jason. 'Is that you in there Jason?' she asked as she came to stand in front of him and looked up at him.

'Who is Jason? I'm the Easter Bunny!' Jason replied, changing the tone of his voice as he replied.

'No, you're not! You're Jason in there under all that!' Ruby laughed as Jason bent forwards so she could tug gently on the ears. 

Jason ignored her statement and looked at her, his eyes twinkling in mischief. 'Do you want to go on an Easter Egg hunt?'

'Yesssss!!!' Ruby shrieked at the top of her voice, taking the wicker basket from his hand which his house keeper Greta had found for him to put the eggs in.

'Well, your mum has a map. You have to work out where they all are by looking at the map,' Jason nodded with his head, his ears flopping about and smacking him in the face, as he indicated to where Jess stood by the open patio door clutching the map in her hand.

Ruby grabbed hold of his hand and dragged him towards the door to fetch the map as Jess stood there, still trying to work out whether he looked slightly sexy or absolutely ludicrous in his get-up.

'Where in the hell did you find that outfit, Jay?' Jess whispered to him, as Ruby yanked him through the door to help her in her quest to find the eggs.

'Rob. He wore it at the Progress concert and he sent it over when I told him what I had planned,' Jason whispered with a manic grin as he hurtled into the garden, as he trailed in Ruby's wake.

Jess followed closely behind them as Ruby studied the map, her tongue clamped between her lips as she tried to work out from Jason's rudimentary map where all the eggs were hidden. 

'Shall I hold the basket, Ruby and you hunt for the eggs?' Jason asked, as she got down on her hands and knees and started poking about in the greenery around the patio.

Ruby handed him the basket and dropped down on her knees, rummaging around until she emerged triumphantly with her precious pink Percy Pig clutched in her hand. 'My favourite!' she giggled, as she dropped the egg in the basket and scooted further along the patio to begin searching in a new spot.

'So I gathered...' Jason replied drily, as she found a second egg and dropped it in the basket.

By the time she'd finished, there were ten eggs in the basket and Jess was looking aghast at the thought of Ruby eating all ten eggs. 'You can have a bit of one, Ruby. We're out for lunch and I don't want you ruining your appetite.

'Can I have some of my Percy egg, mummy?' Ruby looked pleadingly at Jess as she asked the question, before fixing Jason with a big smile. 'Thank you for doing this for me, Jason,' she wound her arms around his waist for the second time that day and looked up at him. 'I wish you were my dad.'

Jason stroked her head again and felt tears inexplicably come to his eyes. Partly because he was touched and partly because of the confusion in his head about how he was feeling about Jess. 'You're welcome,' he replied, his voice slightly choked with emotion.

Ruby took hold of his hand and pulled he I'm back to the house. 'I'll share my Percy Pig egg with you if you like?' she called over her shoulder in his direction, not seeing the look on his face that it wasn't something he looked particularly keen about.


	35. Chapter 35

Later on, as Jess got changed ready to go out for lunch she stole a quick glance at Jason as he came into the bedroom to get ready for lunch. He seemed back to normal again after he'd done the egg hunt with Ruby and had even tried a tiny bit of Ruby's famous Percy Pig egg after a bit of persuasion, declaring that it hadn't tasted as bad as he was expecting. He'd then spent an hour colouring in a picture with Ruby, which had been a free gift with the egg, still dressed in his Bunny outfit - though the ears had been taken off and Ruby had gleefully put them on her head instead.

Jason turned to look at Jess as she attempted to fasten a necklace round her neck. 'Do you need a hand?' he asked softly, noticing that she had been watching him as she nodded. He took his trainers off and walked up behind her, slipping his glasses over his eyes so he could see the tiny catch. 'I'm sorry...' he said in a low voice, his breath gusting onto her neck in a small puff as he fastened the catch and dropped a kiss onto her neck.

Jess turned around, confusion etched on her face. 'Sorry for what?'

'For being such a moody bastard. I'm not good at this relationship thing,' he replied, shrugging his shoulders and looking down to the carpet.

'Want to talk about it?'

'I don't know how to explain it. Even in my fucked up mind it doesn't make sense, Jess. So how could you understand?'

Jess sat down on the bed and looked up at him expectantly. 'Try me, Jay?' she said in a quiet voice, as she wondered whether he was trying to tell her that now they'd slept together he didn't want a relationship with her. The one thing she had said to him that she didn't want to happen.

Jason sat down next to her on the bed and took her hand in his. 'I don't know if I can give you what you want.'

'And what exactly do you think I want?' Jess asked, feeling slightly exasperated with him as she realised he was fumbling around in his head to explain how he felt.

'A father for Ruby. A husband.' Jason ran his hand through his hair in a distracted fashion, as he tried to articulate how he felt.

'Is that what you think I'm after?' Jess asked, her mouth dropping open in surprise at his words. 'Don't fucking flatter yourself!' she burst out laughing at the shocked expression which flitted across his face as she swore at him. 'Do you think you could change out of that ridiculous bloody bunny outfit? It's somewhat hard having a serious in-depth conversation with you sat there looking like Bugs Bunny!'

Jason kicked off the outfit, one piece of clothing at a time, before turning back to face her in just his his underwear. 'So, winding back, what did you just say to me?' 

'I said don't fucking flatter yourself!'

'He looked at her in complete confusion. 'But Howard said he thought you're in love with me. So I just assumed....' he grabbed hold of her hand and held it in his, sitting back down on the bed next to her.

'Is that so?' she snatched her hand out of Jason's and fixed him with an angry glare, trying to ignore he had nothing on but his underwear. 'Don't you think being married to Steve might have put me off getting married again? I think I've coped pretty well without a man in my life until now and despite what I overheard Ruby say to you about wanting you to be her dad, it doesn't mean that's what she's going to get!'

'I was thinking you'd fallen madly in love with me and was expecting marriage and maybe more kids....'

Jess tried to control the twitch in her lips, which was threatening to make her laugh out loud as she realised that Joanna had been right when she'd explained to her how Jason would behave and that he was truly terrified of being tied to her before he was ready. She was glad she'd listened to her advice, because now it meant she knew pretty much what was going on in his head. 'I can assure you I'm not madly in love with you, Jay. I don't want to marry you and after the nightmare of Ruby's emergency delivery I don't think I'll be having any kids anytime soon!' she said, trying hard again not to laugh at his aghast expression as she turned the tables on him.

Jason looked at her in astonishment, taken aback at her choice of words. It was the first time in his life a woman wasn't trying to tie him down and he wasn't too sure whether he liked the feeling that he was actually keener on her than she was him by the sounds of things. 'So, are you using me just for sex?' he asked, now understanding how it felt for the women he used to sleep with just once or twice when he was in the band.

Jess hesitated, thinking if only he knew she was actually falling in love with him he'd run a mile. 'Well, I do like you and I like spending time with you so it's not all about sex.'

'Jess, you're confusing me. You said you only wanted a relationship if I was serious about you. Now you're the one who's saying you want to be friends with benefits?' Jason ran his hand through his hair again, trying to work out what was going on, because he sure as hell hadn't a clue. One minute he'd been rehearsing a little speech in his head about it getting too hot and heavy and wanting to cool things a little and now here she was saying she basically wanted him for a booty call when it suited her.

'Well I'd like to think we're a bit more than friends with benefits, Jay. I'm just not in love with you. Is that how you feel too?'

Jason's teeth gnawed at his bottom lip as he thought about how he felt. 'I really like you, Jess and I love spending time with you. I guess I just panicked that you were wanting some kind of commitment from me.'

'No. I like my independence, Jay. You worry too much....' her eyes flicked to her watch as she answered him. 'You'd better get yourself in the shower if we're out for lunch soon.' 

'Ok,' he dropped a kiss on her upturned lips and grinned at her as he turned away to head off into the bathroom.

Jess picked up her phone and disappeared off into the kitchen to ring Joanna as she heard the shower switch on and Jason begin his tuneless whistling. As she switched the kettle on to make herself a mint tea while she waited, she realised it was very fortuitous that Joanna had explained how to work out what Jason was feeling. She chuckled under her breath when she thought back to Jason's insulted expression when he thought she wanted to be friends with benefits. Checking Ruby wasn't in ear-shot she speed-dialled Joanna's number, pouring her tea as she waited for her to pick up.

'Hi Jess. How are you?' Joanna's voice came onto the phone after a few rings.

'I'm good. I just wanted to thank you.'

'Oh? Why?'

'Just for giving me the heads up on the way Jay's mind works where relationships are concerned.'

'He did his usual then? The backing off when he thinks it's getting too serious?'

Jess cradled the phone between her ear and cheek as she took a sip of her tea. 'Yeah. He thought I was expecting wedding bells and everything. I put him straight on that one!'

'Jesus Jess, you've only been together a matter of weeks!' Joanna replied, thinking Jason was behaving true to form.

'I know. Well now he knows that I'm not looking for that. In fact, you should have seen his face at first. He thought I was actually wanting him to be my friend with benefits.'

Joanna burst out laughing as she imagined the expression on Jason's face. 'Oh, that's priceless! He thought you wanted him for sex! Well at least he knows how all those women felt when that was what he was doing when he was in the band. So, what now?'

'Well, I set him right that it's a bit more than that.'

'You didn't tell him how you really feel about him then?'

'I'm falling for him Joanna. It scares me in case he hurts me - and Ruby of course, because she adores him.'

'Howard reckons he really likes you and he said his face when Ruby hugged him was shocked at first, but then his expression softened as he hugged her back. He said Jay acted like it's nothing serious to him, but they're like an old married couple - he can spot little nuances and expressions that Jay doesn't even know he gives off. He reckons Jay is falling for you and won't acknowledge it, because it scares him.

Joanna's words warmed Jess's heart as she heard them. 'Thank you. Jay's just coming so I'd better go.' She rang off just as Jason walked into the kitchen and gave her a beaming smile as he saw she was ready.

'Is Ruby ready?' he asked, sauntering over and folding his arms around her waist as she stood with her back against the kitchen units as she drank her tea.

Jess nodded and pulled his face down to kiss him on the lips. 'Yes. She's in the garden checking she hasn't missed any eggs,' she pointed in the direction of the garden where Ruby was craning over the flowerbeds, trying to see without kneeling down and getting her dress dirty.

Looking out into the garden, Jason smiled as he saw what Ruby was doing. 'She's a real little character isn't she? I love having her in my class, because she's just so funny and outspoken.'

'That's good to hear. I always worry that Steve not being around has affected her.'

'Not from what I can see. When I first met her and she drew the picture of her family she was a bit upset. But she's taken it all in her stride and probably having less contact with him has built her confidence,' he shrugged his shoulders, almost like he was saying he was no expert, but that was his thinking.

Jess nodded and looked up a him. 'Yes I think you're right. Plus having a good teacher who understands helps too.'

Jason flashed a grin at her. 'Well, that goes without saying,' he cocked his head to one side as he studied her. 'Can we forget about our conversation earlier?'

Dropping a gentle kiss on Jason's lips, Jess looked up at him from under her lashes. 'I'd like nothing more.'


	36. Chapter 36

The rest of Sunday passed without incident and on the Monday morning they turned up late morning for their Quad biking. As Ruby was too young to go with the adults, Jason had arranged to meet Howard there, so Eloise could do the same course for children as Ruby and then the three of them would do the adult course.

As they sped across the bogs and streams Jason chased Jess across the hills, not wanting her to beat him or he'd never hear the last of it from Jess and Ruby. As he got closer to her he could see her hair had come loose from the plait which she'd tied it in prior to leaving the house. Glancing over her shoulder, she howled with laughter at Jason's determined expression. Howard had managed to skid off course and was way behind them as they chased each other.

Drawing alongside Jess, Jason arched an eyebrow at her and stuck his tongue out, knowing that it was winding Jess up just by her expression as she stuck her tongue back at him in mock annoyance. 'I'm so gonna beat you!' he shouted at the top of his voice, making the showy hand gesture at her that she remembered seeing him make on The Circus DVD when he was riding the unicycle. He passed her and carried on going, leaving her trailing in his wake.

Jess deliberately slowed down until she came to a stop, knowing at some point he'd realise she wasn't behind him and would either stop to check she was ok or turn around. 

Slowing down, Jason realised he couldn't hear Jess behind him. He looked over his shoulder and noticed she had stopped and wore a look of consternation on her face. Guessing she'd broken down, he swung his Quad bike around and made his way back to Jess to check she was ok. 'Are you.... ok?' he asked, his words dying in his throat as she suddenly revved the engine and shot past him, sticking her tongue out at him as she went streaking past. She laughed loudly at the confused expression on his face, as he realised she was playing dirty in an attempt to beat him. 'Just you wait til I catch you up!' he called after, revving his own bike and beginning to chase her.

Jess laughed over her shoulder and continued to speed ahead until she reached the starting point, which indicated the end of the course. As she slowed to a stop, Jason appeared behind her a few seconds later. 'Ok, you've caught me up! What are you going to do?' she swung her leg over the Quad bike, dropping down so she was standing next to the vehicle as she grinned suggestively at him.

Jason jumped off his Quad bike as they waited for Howard and the instructor to catch them up and folded her into his arms, his mouth dipping down towards her ear. 'I'll have to think of something suitable,' his stubble tickled against her ear-lobe as he whispered into it.

Jess felt the involuntary shiver run through her as he whispered the words. She knew he must be able to feel her reaction as he held her tight in his arms and wished that she felt more in control of herself whenever he touched her.

A few minutes later Howard appeared with the instructor and they headed off to the track where Ruby and Eloise were. 

'Ruby and Eloise seem to have hit it off, don't they?' Howard remarked, looking across at Jess as they made their way to meet the girls. 

'Yes, Ruby said she had such a good time when she stayed at yours. Thank you.'

'You're welcome. Maybe we could arrange another sleepover for them one weekend or when they have no school. I'll leave you and Joanna to sort it out between you as I have no clue when kids are off school.' Howard replied, smiling at her.

'That would be lovely.' Jess remarked, thinking it was a lovely idea, but surely Eloise would turn her nose up at her tiny house if she ended up coming to her house for a sleepover?

'I'll tell Jo to ring you then,' Howard grinned, waving at Eloise as she came towards them with Ruby close behind. 'I'm afraid we'll have to disappear now as we're due to meet Jo's parents for dinner,' he quickly hugged Jess and then turned to Jason, grabbing him in a big bear hug. 'Don't leave it so long to get in touch again, Jay!'

'I won't.' Jason assured him, hugging him tightly in return.

As they walked away to get in the car, Jess looked at Jason. 'I can't believe I've just had the most surreal conversation with the one and only Howard from Take That about his daughter and mine having a sleepover. I think I need to pinch myself,' she laughed, shaking her head in amazement.

'So being on holiday with someone who used to be in the band with him is normal then?' Jason chuckled lightly, pinching her backside cheekily as he walked around to the other side of the car to drive them home.

'Slightly surreal sometimes.' Jess laughed, thinking if someone had said to her a year ago that she'd be on holiday with Jason - ex singer from Take That and that she'd be sharing his bed, she'd have thought they were mad.

As they drove through the narrow roads leading back to his house, Jason looked across at Jess. 'Are you ok if we leave tomorrow morning? I have a mountain of lessons to plan before we go back to school on Wednesday.'

'Of course. I'm back to work on Wednesday too, so it will give me time to get Ruby sorted. If you need to do any work this afternoon so you have less to do tomorrow me and Ruby can watch a film?'

Jason chewed at his bottom lip as he thought about her suggestion. He knew it was a good idea as he would be working late when he got home, but it was Easter Monday and he wanted to spend their last few hours together. 'No. Why don't we watch a trashy film together? I'm pretty sure I have some popcorn in the house in case my nieces and nephews come to stay, so I'll microwave some for Ruby and we can cuddle up on the sofa together.'

'That sounds lovely,' Jess replied, thinking it sounded idyllic.

It was just before midday the following day when Jason dropped them off home. Jess busied herself doing laundry and ironing Ruby's uniform ready for the morning. She looked into the lounge and smiled proudly as she saw Ruby was doing her homework which Jason had set for the class before school finished for Easter. 'What are you writing about?' she asked Ruby as she looked over her shoulder and surveyed her neat writing.

'Our weekend away, mummy. I have so many things to write about though.' Ruby looked up at Jess, feeling unsure what to write about.

'Well why don't you just write about the Ghyll scrambling? Was that one of your favourite things you did?' Jess asked, resting her hand on Ruby's shoulder as Ruby nodded decisively.

Wandering into the kitchen, Jess flicked the kettle on and dropped a tea bag into a mug. While she waited for the kettle to boil she picked her phone up to see if Jason had sent her a text. When she saw that he hadn't sent her one, she assumed he must be already hard at work and swiftly sent him one instead to thank him for their weekend away.

Over at his flat Jason heard his phone ping indicating he'd received a text. Picking up his phone, he keyed in his passcode and smiled when he saw her message thanking him. He smiled, thinking that he'd reply when he'd finished making his notes for the lessons he had to plan for the rest of the week.

Jess's phone alarm woke her up early the following morning with its incessant annoying tinny tune. Turning over, she switched it off and noticed that Jason hadn't replied to her text from the previous evening. She assumed he must have been working into the evening and either hadn't noticed her text or had forgotten to reply. She thought nothing more of it, figuring that he'd contact her after school had finished - when things were quieter.

As they walked to school, Jess looked over at Ruby and smiled at her, 'did you remember to bring your homework that you were doing last night?'

Ruby patted her rucksack and smiled up at her mum. 'Yes, it's in my bag.'

'So, you have to remember to call Jason, Mr Orange as you're back at school. I'll be back to pick you up after school. Ok?

Ruby nodded and let go of Jess's hand as they got inside the school gates and she spotted her friends. Jess continued to walk towards the area where Ruby's classroom was, knowing Ruby would want a kiss before going into class. Her face lit up as she saw Danni was already there and she wandered over to stand next to her. 

'Good weekend with Mr O?' Danni whispered out of the corner of her mouth in Jess's direction.

'Yeah, fantastic thanks.' Jess replied back quietly, not noticing that Lucas's mum was stood nearby with her witches coven as Jess and Danni jokingly called the group of women who were well known to be the playground gossips.

'Annie was over here a minute ago asking if you're his girlfriend,' Danni remarked, shooting an angry look at the group as she saw them elbowing each other as they saw Jess had appeared.

'What did you say?' Jess asked, her heart sinking.

'I just said no, you're just friends. Was that the right thing to say?'

'And what did she say?' Jess asked quietly, wishing they hadn't been spotted.

'That you looked very cosy when she saw you. I don't think she believed me when I said you're just friends. I assume you're more than friends now though?' Danni asked, looking at Jess supportively and thinking it wasn't going to be much fun running the gauntlet every day with Annie and her friends laughing and staring. It didn't take a genius to see Jess liked him, judging by the way her face softened when she mentioned his name.

'Um yeah... but we're trying to keep it quiet.' Jess flushed with embarrassment as she recalled back to how they hadn't been able to keep their hands off each other once they'd slept together the first time. 

'Well unless I'm mistaken you've been banging each other's brains out the whole weekend by the fact that you're blushing.' 

'Danni, stop it!' Jess flushed even brighter red and rolled her eyes at her sister in response to her question. 

Ruby suddenly appeared at her side, which stopped any more conversation about their weekend, as the school bell sounded to indicate the pupils needed to go in.

Inside the classroom Jason heaved a deep sigh. He'd spent the best part of an hour in Mike, the head-master's office and he was feeling unsure what to do now for the best. Mike had called him in for a chat as he'd seen him pass his office on his way to the staff room. His thoughts went back to what had been said an hour earlier and he ran his hand through his hair, causing it to stand on end as he went over what had happened in his head. 

An hour earlier......

Mike looked out of his window as he saw Jason arrive on his bike and begin to lock it up. Opening the door, he left it wide open so he could see Jason walk past. A couple of minutes later Jason came past on his way to the staff room to get a cup of tea. 'Jay!' he called out as he spotted him. 'Can I have a word for a minute?'

Jason poked his head into Mike's office, grinning at him as he saw him sitting hard at work. He guessed knowing Mike he'd probably been hard at work since 8am or before. 'Yeah, of course. Can I just get a cup of tea? Do you want one?'

'Yes please.' Mike replied, smiling back in response.

Jason was back a few minutes later with a mug in each hand and his bag full of lesson plans slung over his shoulder. Putting the mug down in front of Mike, he sat down on the chair nearby, shoving his bag on the floor next to him. 'You look serious. What's up? You're not sacking me already are you?' he joked, trying to cover up the nervousness running through him at Mike's serious expression.

'Jay, there's been a complaint about you?' Mike looked at him sheepishly as he swivelled round in his chair so he was facing Jason.

Jason looked at him, totally gob-smacked as to what he'd done wrong. His mind turned over as he tried to think back what he could have done wrong. 'What about?'

'It seems Lucas's mum spotted you and Ruby's mum this weekend and put two and two together and made five. She's accused you of favouritism and said that it's not fair Ruby being in your class.'

'But I treat her exactly the same as all the other pupils! Besides, we've only been seeing each other a matter of weeks!'

'I'm not doubting you, Jay. But I have to tell you what she's said. She's demanding that I move Ruby to another class or she'll take it to the board of trustees.' Mike took a sip of his tea and looked apologetically at Jason. 

'You can't do that, Mike. That would be totally unfair on Ruby. I know exactly why she's doing it. She tried it on with me at parents evening and I turned her down. It's jealousy - pure and simple.' He looked at Mike, his expression aghast at the thought of what Annie was asking him to do.'

'Really? That now makes sense then - given the choice of Annie and Jess I know which one I'd choose every time.' Mike chuckled dirtily as his mind strayed to both women. 

'So what happens now? Please don't move Ruby. She's just settled in and made friends and it's like punishing her for mine and Jess's relationship.'

'Jay, I really don't think I have an option...' Mike trailed off, looking at Jason directly. 'I guess you have to make a decision as to whose happiness is most important? Ruby's or yours and Jess's.'


	37. Chapter 37

Jess glanced at her phone as Ruby went into class and noticed Jason hadn't replied back to her text from the day before. She assumed he'd been so busy preparing for the week's lessons that he'd not noticed or forgotten. It wasn't particularly unusual for him to take a while to reply as he didn't have his phone permanently attached to him like most people, so she wasn't particularly worried. Walking out of the playground once Ruby was dropped off, she passed Annie and her friends. They immediately stopped talking and painted innocent expressions on their faces as if she wasn't the main topic of conversation as she hurried past them.

At 1.30pm her boss Paul came over, a big smile on his face as he saw her hard at work. 'Did you have a nice weekend away?'

Jess nodded and smiled up at him as he stood by her desk and looked down at her. 'Yes thanks.'

'I noticed you've been day dreaming a lot today. Is everything ok?' 

'Yes. Sorry. I realised my mind wasn't on the job when I saw I'd not got as much work done as normal. Do you want me to stay later?' she asked, instantly feeling guilty that her day-dreaming about Jason was affecting her work and resolved to try to put all thoughts of him out of her head.

'No of course not. I'm just glad to see you're happy, Jess. I actually came over to say that it's fine to increase your hours if you like, as you asked about increasing them last week. So would 10 til 2.45 on a Thursday suit you, so you can still pick Ruby up from school?'

'Ah, that would be great. Then at least the issue of Steve's lack of maintenance is sorted out.'

'Do you think you'll move in with your new bloke? Paul asked, trying to remember Jason's name as he wondered if she would be soon living in another part of the city and would want to change her hours again in the not too distant future.

'Um, his name is Jason. Not at the moment. We're only just getting to know each other,' Jess replied, not really wanting to discuss Jason too much in case she somehow let slip who he was in the past.

Paul nodded. 'Ok. I'm just off out to get a sandwich and meet a friend. If I'm not back when you need to collect Ruby, just lock up.'

'Ok,' Jess agreed, as her mobile phone began to ring. Picking it up, she saw it was her mum ringing and answered, just in case it was important. 'Hi mum, how are you?' she asked, waving a small wave at Paul as he left the office to meet his friend.

'Yes. I was just ringing to let you know your cousin Peter is coming over from New Zealand for a couple of weeks next month. As it's a Saturday morning when he lands could you pick him up? It's the 29th so he can be here for Bank Holiday weekend in May. Is that ok?'

Jess consulted her diary quickly and saw she was free. 'Yeah, of course I can. What time does he land at Manchester?'

'9.10 am. Hang on, I'll forward his itinerary by email so you have his flight number,' her mum suggested, forwarding the email at the other end of the phone as they spoke. 'Did you and Ruby have a nice weekend?'

'Yes, it was lovely. He spoilt us both and we had such fun!' Jess replied, smiling softly as she wrote in her diary to pick Peter up on the 29th of the following month.

'Well that's great Jess. It's nice to see you happy,' her mum remarked, smiling with relief that Jess seemed happier than she had in a long time. They chatted for a couple of minutes longer, before Jess said she'd better get back to work. Paul was a good boss, but it didn't mean he'd be impressed if she spent all day chatting to her mum and day-dreaming about Jason.

Jess left at 2.45pm to pick Ruby up from school. As she navigated the streets in her car, she sang along to the Emeli Sande CD she had playing in the background. Pulling up at the car park next to the school, she hurried into the playground at bang on 3pm. It didn't escape her notice that Annie and her friends were huddled in their usual place and abruptly stopped talking again as she walked past them. She fixed them with a sickly sweet smile and said hello before walking past and standing next to where Danni was waiting.

As the final stragglers left his classroom Jason sat down at his desk and removed his black-rimmed glasses, massaging his eyelids with his fingertips in an attempt to get rid of the headache he'd had all day. 'Well that was fun...' he trailed off under his breath as his thoughts turned to his eventful day. It had started out completely shit and hadn't improved at all - in fact, he couldn't remember a day like it since he'd started teaching.

A few hours earlier.....

As the children came into the classroom in the morning he had asked them to put their workbooks on his desk, so he could mark them later. Most of the boys hadn't done their homework and he'd noticed that it was the same culprits as usual - Lucas and his little crowd of friends - the more disruptive kids in his class. Normally he could handle them, but this morning it was almost like they sensed his mind wasn't on the job and messed about. When they'd had a music lesson just before lunch Lucas had crashed the cymbals over and over again as loud as he could every time Jason had spoken, until Jason's temper was beginning to simmer. 'One more bang and you'll stay in here at lunchtime and have a detention instead of going out to play football,' Jason said, waggling his finger in Lucas's direction and fixing him with a hard stare. He had a weird feeling Lucas's mum had said something to her son about seeing him and Jess at the weekend, because he was being more disruptive than usual.

'Ok. Sorry.' Lucas said, not looking particularly apologetic. He put the cymbals down and picked up a quieter metal triangle to play instead as he sidled up next to Ruby with a grin. 'My mummy said Mr Orange is shagging your mum, Ruby,' he whispered so that only she could hear.

Ruby looked at Lucas in confusion. She didn't like Lucas much and she didn't understand what he meant. 'I don't understand what that means?' she said, looking at him and then glancing across to Jason as he stood the other side of the room talking to one of the other pupils.

'Mr Orange!!!! Ruby doesn't understand something!!!!' Lucas called across the room, waiting until he had not only Jason's attention, but the whole class's. Jason began to make his way across the room, ready to tell Lucas to quieten down. Lucas grinned at his friends who had by now all stopped with their music lesson and stood listening to what was going on. Now that he was centre stage in the classroom, Lucas had no intention of relinquishing it as he loved an audience more than anything.

Jason looked at Ruby and knew instantly that something was up as he glimpsed her confused expression 'What's wrong, Ruby?' he asked as he stood in front of the two of them, looking at them both one at a time.

'Well my mum said you're shagging Ruby's mum. I asked Ruby if it was true, but she doesn't know what it means either. What does shagging mean?' Lucas asked mischievously, knowing by Jason's livid expression it was something rude. He'd had half an idea what it might be when his mum had said it out loud to him, but thought it would be fun to ask as it might get a laugh amongst his friends.

Ruby looked around the class, her eyes filling with tears as all the boys who were friends with Lucas began laughing as they all waited for Jason to answer.

Jason took a moment to recover his composure. He looked at Lucas, knowing the boy had an inkling as to what it meant as he fixed him with a grim look. 'That's not something to be discussed in this classroom, Lucas. You can stay behind after this lesson and have an hours' detention for being disruptive in class,' he then turned to look at his friends who were no longer laughing and looked a bit scared at how angry Jason looked. 'If I hear that word mentioned again in here or I hear any of you laughing, you'll be joining him. Ok?' he waited until they all nodded at him and looked at him with scared faces. They all knew that Jason was generally mild-mannered, but if he was angry you did what you were told without arguing.

Ruby stood looking at Jason, still not quite sure what was going on and feeling a little bit frightened at Jason's expression. 'Am I in trouble Mr Orange?' she asked, worried in case he gave her a detention too. 

Jason felt his anger dissipate at the scared expression which crossed her face. 'No. You're not in trouble, Ruby. I'll speak to you before you go to lunch. Ok?'

The rest of the lesson passed peacefully and as the children left the classroom Jason made sure Lucas didn't leave with his friends. 'I think you owe Ruby an apology, don't you?' Jason asked sternly, as he waited for Lucas to do as he asked.

Lucas looked at Ruby, scowling as he did so. 'Sorry....' he mumbled under his breath in a sullen manner. 'I only repeated what my mum said.'

'Well it's none of your mum's business and I don't want to hear you speak to Ruby or any of the other pupils like that again.' He waited for the nearly imperceptible nod of Lucas's head before speaking again. 'Right, I'd like you to sit here and read for the next forty five minutes and eat your lunch in here.'

'But I have a football match planned with my friends against the boys in the other class.' Lucas protested, looking at Jason beseechingly.

'I know. Well you haven't today.' Jason knew that Lucas was the star player in the class and by making him stay behind to read it was a punishment he wouldn't want to repeat again. He ignored Lucas's annoyed groan of disappointment and turned to Ruby with a reassuring smile. 'Ruby, can I talk to you outside?'

Ruby looked at Jason warily as they went outside in the corridor and sat down on the chairs which were normally used for children to sit on if they'd been sent out of the classroom for bad behaviour. 'What did Lucas mean?' she asked in a small voice, her mind wandering back again to all the boys laughing.

Jason scrabbled about in his brain as he tried to find an explanation for her, thinking nobody had warned him how to deal with this kind of thing on his teacher training course. 'It's a nickname - sort of like a swear word for someone who is boyfriend and girlfriend and they sleep together in bed. Like me and your mum did at the weekend.'

'Ah, so you can kiss mummy good night and hug her?'

'Yeah, something like that...' Jason replied, as he stifled a sigh of relief that she wasn't going to ask any more questions. 

'Should I say anything to mummy about what Lucas said when she asks about my day?' Ruby asked, thinking it would make Jess upset or angry if she knew the boys had been laughing and upset her.

'No. Don't worry about it. She'll only worry, Ruby. I'll speak to her. Now, go and find your friends and I'll see you after lunch, ok?' Jason smiled at her, thinking she really was a credit to Jess and what a cute kid she was.

Ruby nodded and went off to find her friends without another thought, leaving Jason with an ocean full of unwanted feelings kicking round in his head as he once again wondered what to do for the best.

3pm......

Jason got up from where he sat at the desk and massaged his eyelids one last time. He wondered if Jess was still outside, thinking he might be better to speak to her sooner rather than later. Walking out into the playground he glimpsed Jess's back as she slowly wandered towards the exit with Danni with Maisie and Ruby following closely behind. 'Mrs Shaw!!! Can I speak to you?' he called out, jogging towards her.

Jess swung around at his voice and stopped walking as he reached them. It seemed strange that he was calling her name formally, she thought to herself. She ignored the stares of some of the other parents and looked at him. 'Do you want to speak to me here?'

'No, I'll finish up here and then come to the house,' he said quietly so only Jess and Danni could hear.

Jess looked at him, feeling a little nervous at his serious expression. 'Do you want to speak to me on my own or with Ruby?'

'Just you please,' Jason felt his breath hitch as he looked at her, his mind in turmoil as he felt the pull of attraction as he noticed how gorgeous she looked. She had on the skirt she had worn on his night out with Gary - a skirt which flattered her legs, he thought to himself as he tried not to look at them.

Jess turned around to look at Danni. 'Could you take Ruby home with you and I'll pick her up when I've spoken to Mr Orange?' she guessed if he was using her formal name she'd better do the same as they were inside the school property.

'No problem. I'll take her home for dinner. Just text me when you want me to bring her home, Jess,' Danni suggested, her eyes narrowing as she studied Jason's expression. Unless she was very much mistaken Jason was not his usual self.

'Ok, I'll see you in a little while?' Jess asked him, wondering what all this was about.

'Yeah, give me half an hour and I'll be with you,' he replied, shoving his hands in the front pockets of his black chino trousers and backing away in the direction of the classroom.


	38. Chapter 38

Jess felt inexplicably nervous as she walked back home. Judging by the expression on Jason's face when they had spoken at school, he had something serious he needed to speak to her about and she wondered what it was. Twenty minutes later there was a soft knock at the door and Jess hurried to the door, opening it wide so Jason could come in. She smiled at him in greeting, the smile dying on her face as she saw his grim expression. She couldn't help but notice how tired he looked as he walked into the hallway and hoped he hadn't been working too late the night before.

'Do you want a coffee or tea?' she asked, as they stood looking uncomfortably at each other. 

'No thanks.' Jason's eyes raised upwards as if he was trying to gather his thoughts together. 'I came because I need to speak to you,' he tried to ignore the thought that was running through his head once again telling him to admit to her what was really going on. He kept thinking it would be for the best if she didn't know he'd been given a choice to make, as it would put her in an awkward position.

'Well, come through to the lounge and we can sit down,' Jess suggested, feeling uneasy as she saw that he was having trouble looking at her.

Sitting down on the sofa, she waited expectantly as he sat down in the chair opposite her and heaved a deep sigh. 'Jay, what's up? You're worrying me. Is Ruby ok?'

Jason knew he would need to tell her about what had taken place that day at school in case Ruby inadvertently let it slip what Lucas had said.'Yes, she's fine. There was an incident at school today between her and Lucas, but it's sorted.'

'Oh, what kind of incident?' Jess asked, wondering if that was what he wanted to speak to her about.

Jason leant forwards, his hands on his thighs as he looked at her. 'Um, he was teasing her about us and embarassed her in front of the class, so I gave him a detention and he's apologised.' 

'Is that what you've come to talk to me about or is it us?' Jess looked at him, feeling slightly confused.

'Jess, it's us.' Jason gestured helplessly with his hands. 'It's not going to work. I really wanted it to. I honestly thought that it would be different once I left the band - the way I feel about being in a serious relationship I mean. But it's not.' As he said the words, he felt a pain in his chest, almost like his heart was breaking in two. It was killing him to lie to her, but he couldn't put her in the position where she had to choose her own happiness over Ruby's or vice versa. He'd told himself over and over that he was doing the right thing by making the decision for her as he'd cycled over to her house.

'Jay, you've lost me. What do you mean? It was just sex and nothing more?' she could hardly believe her ears. After their conversation while they were away, when she'd assured him she didn't want a husband or a father for Ruby, what he was saying made no sense. After all, he'd been the one who had got upset when he thought she was using him for just one thing. So why was he now saying it had been sex and nothing more?

Jason ran his hand through his hair, hating himself as he saw the anguish on her face. It was killing him to tell her she meant nothing to him. Because at that moment, as he looked at her, he realised he thought more of her than any other woman he'd ever been with. 'Yes. I thought that if I slept with someone who was the opposite to the usual kind of girl I went for, that I would want to settle down. I thought it was being in the band that was the problem, but it turns out it's me,' he lied, his tone hoarse as he tried to stop his voice from breaking.

Jess struggled to stop her mouth dropping open in shock at his admission. 'So, me and Ruby were some kind of fucked up experiment? And then you dare to use the "it's not you, it's me" line? What kind of sick game is that to play?'

'It wasn't quite like you put it, Jess.' Jason stated, trying desperately to keep his tone steady as he squashed down the thought once again that maybe he should have told her the truth. 

'It's exactly like that! I said I didn't want a succession of uncles for Ruby and that's exactly what you've done. So, the unbelievable sex was just that? Sex - nothing more, nothing less?' she tilted her head as her eyes blazed into his with anger.

Jason dropped his head in his hands, his fingertips massaging his eyelids as his headache came back with a vengeance. 'Jess, I like you....' he tried to wipe the way she'd looked into his eyes as they made love out of his head as it tortured him over and over. He'd never seen a woman look at him like that with so much emotion and he guessed that he had probably looked at her the same way, judging by how shocked she seemed at his confession. He knew that on the last night of their break, when they'd made love on the final evening, he'd never wanted it to end and had felt something shift between the two of them as they'd fallen asleep in each other's arms.

Jess stood up, not wanting to hear any more. 'From now on don't talk to me at school, unless it's about Ruby. Thank god she's only in your class until July and then I won't be reminded every day how stupid I was to trust you.'

Jason looked at Jess and fought back the feeling that he wanted to just hold her. 'I'm sorry.'

'Get out!' Jess, pointed towards the door, her teeth biting down on her bottom lip as she tried to control her emotions as Jason looked at her, hesitating as if he wanted to hold her. 'I said, get out!' Jess repeated, looking down at her feet so he wouldn't see the pain in her eyes. She waited until she heard the door close softly, indicating that he'd gone before sinking back down onto the sofa and putting her head into her hands as she burst into tears.

Jason managed to keep a lid on his emotions until he reached his classroom. Slamming the door shut, his body slid down the length of the door until he hit the floor as the tears rolled down his face. He couldn't get the vision of her beautiful face looking utterly destroyed as he told her that she basically meant nothing to him. He jumped as he heard knocking on the door and Mike's voice filtering through the wood and stood up to open the door.

Mike looked at Jason in surprise as the door opened. 'Fuck Jay. You look like shit! Are you ok?'

'Not really. I finished with Jess. I just came back to collect some books to Mark this evening - not that I feel like doing it after this evening.'

'I saw you come past my office just now and thought it was strange that you were back here.' Mike remarked, thinking about how dejected Jason had looked when he walked past his office while he was working late. 'I thought you liked her?'

'Yeah I do. But I was left with no choice. You left me with no choice! If I didn't give her up then Ruby would have to move and she's had no proper continuity in her life since her dad left her mum - how can I do that to her?'

Mike looked at him in confusion. 'So you've made a decision to finish it without speaking to Jess about what exactly has happened? Ruby has known continuity since you and Jess began to go out together. Had you thought of that?'

'Yes, but you said I had to choose whose happiness came first.' Jason snapped, his thoughts drifting back to Jess again.

'Jay, I don't think I worded it very well. I didn't mean for you to make that decision alone!'

'Well I've made the decision. If I hadn't made a decision then the career I've worked so hard to achieve may well have been destroyed by Annie Bell's accusations. I've already left one career and I don't intend to leave this one or have it snatched away from me.' Jason said bitterly, hating Annie Bell as he said the words.

'Can't you go back to Jess and tell her what's going on?' Mike asked, feeling guilty that Jason had ended things with her. 'You could have told her what had happened and just cooled things a bit until the end of the school year - maybe not go out out in public so you don't get seen.'

'She said she doesn't want to speak to me again. So it's a bit late for that.' Jason remarked, his heart sinking as he remembered the fury in her face as she told him to get out.

'As long as you're sure?' Mike asked, feeling awful that Jason had acted on his words so decisively. 'Do you want me to speak to Miss Bell about her complaint?' Mike asked. He had to admit he was finding all of this quite challenging and was starting to wish he'd stayed at his old school as deputy head rather than taking on the head teacher's job. It wasn't the first time he'd had issues with Lucas's mum and he suspected it wouldn't be the last.

'No, I'll deal with her. Maybe I should have taken her up on the offer to go up the pub at parents evening and I wouldn't be in this situation.' Jason joked, trying to make Mike feel better. 

'No, but my guess is she wanted a bit more than a drink down the pub, Jay.' Mike batted back at him, feeling relieved that Jason was prepared to speak to her and to try to smooth things over.

'Well, I'm sure if I assure her that her little angel isn't being treated any differently to the other pupils she'll calm down.' Jason said, his tone short as he thought about how much he disliked her.

'Hmm... I wouldn't be so sure, Jay. What will you do about Jess?' he asked, his thoughts going back to the decisive way in which he'd said it was a bit late.

'The way she looked at me I've well and truly fucked up.' Jason dragged his hands through his hair. 'I'm not sure that she'll forgive me - especially as she knows I had a wobble about it getting too serious a couple of days ago.' 

'Well I'd say let her cool down and then try to speak to her.' Mike patted his arm supportively and gave him a re-assuring grin. 'She'll come around. Most women do if you buy them enough flowers.'

'I don't think Jess will - even if I try. She has one hell of a temper.' Jason remarked, thinking back to how angry and hurt she'd looked when she told him to get out. 'After what I said to her I wouldn't blame her if she hated me.'


	39. Chapter 39

Jess cast an eye in her phone's direction as it buzzed to indicate a text had arrived. Picking it up, she cursed herself that her heart had dropped as she hoped it would be Jason. Glancing at it, she noticed it was from Danni. 

D 'When shall I bring Ruby back?'

J 'Anytime. Bring a bottle of wine when you come. I'm out of wine and I need a drink and a chat.'

D 'Everything ok????'

J 'Not really. Jay ended our relationship. Not sure if I'm angry, devastated or both.'

D 'BASTARD!!!!'

J 'Could be wrong, but there's something he's not telling me... just a feeling.'

D 'HE'S A SHIT!'

J 'Did you a swallow a dictionary of male insults?'

D 'Maybe. Ok, he's a WANKER!!!'

J 'I like the last one. Very apt....And you've made me smile through my tears.'

D 'Good. On my way ....xx'

Ten minutes later Danni was on the doorstep holding a bottle of white wine in each hand as Jess opened the door. She followed Jess into the house and immediately folded her into her arms into a tight hug as Daisy and Ruby went straight upstairs to Ruby's bedroom to play. Danni poured them each a glass of wine and looked at Jess with narrowed eyes. 'Have you eaten?'

Jess shook her head. 'I don't think I can manage anything. I don't feel hungry. I've cried until there's no tears left to cry and now I just feel empty.'

'Well I'll put you a pizza in the oven. If you're having a drink you need to eat and I'll bet Jason wouldn't be seen dead eating a Tesco pizza - y'know junk food and all that. So stuff him.' Danni remarked, noticing Jess trying to stifle a laugh at her comment about junk food and Jason.

'Thanks Danni. I really appreciate you coming around,' Jess remarked, taking a sip of her wine and leaning against the worktop as Danni busied herself with finding a pizza for her in the freezer.

Danni stood up, a pepperoni pizza clutched in her hand. 'That's what sisters are for, Jess. So what happened?'

'He said the usual "it's not you, it's me" line that men seem to trot out,' Jess gestured the line with her fingers to emphasise what she meant. 'Basically he left the band because he wanted to meet a girl who liked him for himself. He met me and thought that's what he wanted with me, but it turns out he didn't. I'm guessing he wanted something a bit sexier than me. Not that you'd have thought it when we were away. He was all over me like a rash!'

'Yeah, but he's a bloke. If the queen of England offered herself up on a plate he'd probably still shag it.' Danni said, shoving the pizza in the oven and turning to look at Jess with a sardonic grin on her face.

'Oh that makes me feel really great, Danni - being compared to a woman in her nineties!' Jess choked out a laugh at Danni's words.

'Jess, you know what I mean. He may be Jason and he may be sensitive and gentle, but he's a man and men can be shits.'

'Huh! I didn't see much of his sensitive side today. I feel so bloody hurt and angry, Danni. He said it was sex and that was it. I know he's had wobbles because he thought I wanted marriage and everything, but I thought we were cool and he knew I didn't want that, but I never got vibes off him that it was just sex.'

'Did he actually say that then?' Danni asked, thinking it didn't sound like Jason at all, now that Jess was telling her what had taken place. She'd joked about him being a typical man, but it was obvious to her that he thought Jess was gorgeous and she had a feeling he hadn't actually meant what he said.

'Well not those actual words. But that's what he meant.' Jess said sadly, her eyes welling up with tears again.

'Blimey! You've got it bad, haven't you? Do you love him?' Danni's face was incredulous as she stared at her younger sister.

'I never told him, but yes I do. I thought he was one of the nicest and most handsome men I've met and some of the things he said to me when we slept together made me think it was more than that to him too. He was so good with Ruby too - she adores him.'

'Yeah, I guessed as much. She was telling us about your weekend away and it was Jason this and Jason that the whole afternoon. So is that it or are you going to do something about it seeing as you love him?' Danni put her hands on her hips and gave her a stern look.

'What's the point? Who wants to be with a man who doesn't want her? Besides, Jo - Howard's wife, said if I told him I love him I'd freak him out as he's only had one long term relationship. When he was in the band it was just flings and short lived relationships mostly. He left the band because he knew he'd never meet anyone serious and that's what he thought he wanted.

'Jesus Jess, that would do my bloody head in! The not knowing where you stand with him. He needs to give his head a good wobble and decide what the hell he does want, Jess. If I were you I'd give him something to think about and realise what he's lost.'

'I need to cool down first, Danni. I am so angry with him and to be honest I feel insulted. I can't see how I can forgive him for some of the things he said.'

'And I don't blame you, Jess. Let the dust settle and then see how you feel. Maybe have another chat with him and tell him how he's made you feel and point out a few of his failings so he has something to think about and reflect on.'

'I've got to tell Ruby too. That's going to be hard,' Jess remarked as she thought back to all the things he'd done for her so she'd enjoyed Easter. The more she thought about it, the more things just didn't add up, she thought to herself.

'Just tell her that he has a lot on his plate with school work. In time she'll get over it. You're just going to have to be brave and pretend you're completely fine with it, because if she sees you crying she may well get upset too.' She fixed Jess with a bossy look, before turning to the oven and getting the pizza out. 'Now, eat that and then we're going to drink this wine. Ok?'

Jess smiled at her, thinking how lucky she was. 'Yes mum,' she replied obediently, before taking a slice of pizza and attempting to eat it as instructed.

Pushing the door of his flat open at just past 6pm the wall of silence hit Jason. He hadn't noticed it the previous evening when they got back from the Lake District, as he had been busy planning his lessons and putting a load of washing in the machine. Now, it hit him like a sledge-hammer and he realised that he missed the chatter of Ruby and the physical presence of Jess being with him.

Later in the shower as he washed his hair, his thoughts turned to Jess again and he realised that even though they didn't live together, he missed her. He regretted not telling her the truth - that she was important to him and his thoughts went back to the last night they'd spent together. Something had changed between them as she'd stifled her moans and whispered his name into the curve of his neck as they had made love and he'd felt a connection with her on a deeper level. He had woken as the first fingers of dawn filtered through the curtains the following morning and lay looking at her as she slept, thinking how beautiful she was as she lay on her side facing him. Rinsing his hair, he decided he needed to speak to Annie the following day if he could and that he also owed Jess an apology and hoped she would talk to him.

He was awake the following morning at 5am. He'd slept fitfully, his thoughts full of Jess as he dreamt that she had left and gone back to Steve whenever sleep overtook him and when he was awake all he could see was the mixture of hurt, anger and surprise crossing her face as he told her that he didn't feel anything for her. Swinging his legs out of the bed, he scrubbed his face with the palms of his hands to wake himself up and decided to go out for a run to clear his head before he had breakfast and went to school.

Jess was just washing up when she heard the doorbell ring. Wiping her hands on a towel, she walked towards the front door, her heart bumping uncomfortably in her chest in case it was Jason. She'd slept very little the night before, his words rattling around in her head over and over again and she was really in no mood to see him this morning. Throwing the door open, she was surprised to see Danni and Daisy on the doorstep. 'Oh, what are you doing here?' she asked, looking confused.

'Moral support. Just in case you need it,' Danni's gaze raked up and down Jess as she looked at her. 'You look like shit!'

'Well if that's your idea of moral support you can bugger off!' Jess laughed, knowing she really meant playground moral support. 

'I hope you're not wearing those scruffy jeans, madam? Get yourself up those stairs and put on that skirt he couldn't stop looking at you wearing on that night out!' she waggled her finger at Jess and shooed her towards the stairs. 'Let him see what he's missing.'

'But I don't want to let him see what he's missing!' Jess protested, thinking she didn't even want to set eyes on him because she was so angry at him.

'Yes you do Jess. Even if you don't want to speak to him now. At least stick two fingers up at him so he knows what he's missing.'

Jess set off up the stairs, grumbling under her breath as she did so and returned a few minutes later in the skirt which Jason liked on her and her heeled ankle boots.

Half an hour later Jason walked to his classroom where his class were beginning to queue up ready to go inside. He immediately spotted Annie Bell with her group of friends and walked over to her, noticing Jess standing to one side with her sister out of the corner of his eye. 'Miss Bell, can I speak to you after school please?'

'Ooh, yes Mr Orange!!!' Annie cooed, fluttering her eyelashes at him in a way that she obviously thought was sexy, instantly forgetting that she'd made a complaint about him.

'Ok. Just come to the classroom,' he said before turning away, the thought running through his mind that he might be best to ask his class support worker to stay behind, given Annie's eagerness to go down the pub with him the last time he'd been alone in a room with her. 

'I'm going to love you and leave you Jess,' Danni whispered out of the corner of her mouth and walked away as she saw Jason was headed in their direction, motioning with his hand for the support worker to take his class into their classroom.

'Hello Mr Orange.' Jess said politely, trying to keep her tone cool as her heart beat erratically in her chest. 'Did you want to speak to me about Ruby?'

Jason looked slightly taken aback at her tone as he noticed she was wearing the skirt he liked seeing her in. He wondered whether it was a co-incidence that she'd worn it. 'I wanted to apologise. I'm really sorry that I hurt you and I said some things I didn't mean about us. I need to explain.'

Jess crossed her arms and raised an eyebrow at him, pretending she really didn't care what he had to say. 'And I told you yesterday that the only time I want to speak to you from now on is about Ruby's school progress. You said what you wanted to say yesterday and you hurt me. You don't get the chance to do it again, Jason. From now on I only want to speak to you on a mother to teacher capacity, ok?' She then walked away without a backward glance without waiting for his answer, her heart in her throat as she fought not to cry as she left the playground.


	40. Chapter 40

As Jason walked into the classroom, he wondered how to get through to Jess. Surely the fact that she was wearing something she knew he liked counted for something, didn't it? he thought to himself. Women were so complicated, he mused.

The first lesson which was English went by quickly as the children read out their stories about Easter. As Ruby started to talk about her Easter, she shot him a barely perceptible smile and talked about their trip Ghyll scrambling and how Jess had overcome her fear of water, not once mentioning Jason in her story - simply referring to him as her mum's boyfriend the whole time. As Ruby told the story Jason's heart ached as she talked and he remembered helping Jess and how proud of her he'd been. He looked across the room as he heard a loud snigger and saw Lucas and his friends elbowing each other and smirking while Ruby spoke. He shot the boy a warning look, which instantly stopped him in his tracks as he didn't want another lunchtime detention.

Once all of the pupils had talked about their Easter and went outside for morning break, he had a few moments to catch his breath. He sat down on the edge of his desk and took a deep breath of relief, smiling gratefully at the class support worker Steph as she tidied the desks where the pupils sat who she helped in class. She was there for the handful of pupils who were statemented to receive extra help due to learning difficulties - the majority being Lucas and his friends.

'Everything ok, Jay? You seem a bit on edge today,' Steph asked, thinking he looked extremely tired and not his usual cheerful self.

Jason pushed his glasses up his nose and gave her a small smile. 'Yeah, didn't sleep well last night and got a lot on my mind.'

'Is it regarding the way Lucas spoke to Ruby yesterday?' Steph asked, thinking it didn't take a genius to work out what he was thinking about. She'd been surprised at Lucas's little outburst in class the previous day and had felt extremely sorry for Ruby. She'd also been gobsmacked to hear Jason and Ruby's mum were seeing each other as he hadn't mentioned it to her.

'You heard too? I think the whole bloody class heard - so no doubt by now half the school knows too now' Jason remarked, shaking his head and feeling embarrassed that he'd have people pointing at him - just like when he was in the band. He'd hated it then and he knew that feeling wouldn't have changed.

'Do you want a drink?' Steph asked, heading towards the stationery cupboard where there was a small kettle and cups kept.

'Yeah, that would be good. A mint tea please, Steph.' Jason replied, piling up the English workbooks and then making a start with putting the pupils maths workbooks onto the corresponding desks where each child sat.

Steph was back a few minutes later with a mug in each hand. 'I'm a good listener if it helps?' she said, her tone understanding as she looked at him and smiled a comforting smile. 

Jason took a sip of his tea and smiled sadly back at her. 'Well as you've probably guessed I'd been seeing Ruby's mum, Jess?'

'Yes. I gathered that much. How long for?'

'Around four months I guess.' Jason shrugged, as he counted back the weeks in his head since they'd met properly on the snowy day in winter. 'But serious I guess for just the last few weeks. Jess and Ruby spent Easter with me in the Lake District and that's when Lucas's mum saw us together.'

'And put two and two together and made five?' Steph asked, putting her mug down on the desk and perching on the edge of it.

'Well no, his mum was right that we were seeing each other. Except she decided to put in a formal complaint and accused me of favouring Ruby over the other kids.'

'But I see you every day Jason and I never suspected anything was going on between you and Ruby's mum, so I'd say there's no way you've treated Ruby any differently. If you had then I'd have seen something while I was in class with you. I would have noticed Jason. And I didn't. So if Miss Bell has complained what does she want to happen?'

'She wants Ruby removed from my class as it's not fair on the other kids - according to her,' he raised his eyes to the ceiling as he tried to gather his thoughts. Jess's stricken expression from the previous day invaded his mind yet again and he felt the sharp pain in his chest again.

'I'd say Lucas is a heck of a lot more of an issue in this class than Ruby.' Steph remarked, blowing on her black coffee to cool it so she could drink it. 'I personally think he's the one who needs removing from your class. Whoever placed him here with half a dozen of his friends in one class needs their heads testing. God knows how you handled them so well all this time.'

'It's hard sometimes. The worst thing is Mike told me I needed to decide whether Ruby should move classes or if I should give Jess up so they can't accuse me of favouritism.'

'And you chose Jess, because you felt you had no choice? Because Ruby is settled and you didn't want to let her down like her dad did?' Steph guessed, understanding his dilemma. She knew about the issues surrounding Ruby's dad because Jason had told her in confidence, in case Ruby ever got upset in class. 'And in doing what you have you've let Jess down instead?'

'Yes.' Jason said quietly. 'Except I stupidly didn't tell her the truth about why I was ending our relationship and I'm sort of regretting that now. I should have just told her the truth.'

'Yes, you should have done. I think you should go to Mike and ask for Lucas to be moved instead. I'm happy to back you up about how disruptive he has. Then you can sort things out with Jess. Problem solved!' Steph smiled brightly as if she'd just come up with a brilliant solution. 

'I wish it was that easy. I think Jess hates me. She's absolutely furious with me, because she won't speak to me.'

'Give her time, Jason. You need to give her space and I'm sure she'll come round.' Steph assured him, patting his arm supportively. 'Shall we go see Mike during lunch break and get this sorted?'

'I would really appreciate that. Thank you.' Jason said, looking at her gratefully and wishing he'd spoken to her the previous day about things, rather than unthinkingly going straight round to Jess's house to speak to her.

Two hours later after a meeting with Mike, it was agreed that Lucas would be moved. Steph had backed him up as promised when Jason had explained of his disruptive influence and the bullying comments he'd made to Ruby. Mike had offered half- heartedly to speak to Annie, but Jason felt if he was asking for her son to be moved then he should explain to her why - an offer he was beginning to regret.

'Will you stay when I speak to Annie? The last time I was alone with her she asked me down the pub for a drink. I'm not sure this time whether she'll shout and swear at me or go all seductive on me to try and convince me to change my mind.' Jason grimaced, thinking that Annie was as far from his ideal lady as humanly possible.

'Yeah, of course I will. It should be quite amusing.' Steph remarked, chuckling softly. She knew Annie Lucas from before Jason had started at the school and didn't have a lot of time for her.

After the final lesson Jason followed the pupils out and gestured to Annie to come inside with him. She grinned at him like all her Christmases had come at once and sashayed through the door looking like the cat that had got the cream, ducking under his arm as he held the door open for her. He seriously contemplated letting it slam on her backside as she batted her eyelashes at him, thinking the sight of that would be worth paying money to see.

Jess stood watching what was going on, her eyes narrowed as she saw Annie simpering like an idiot at him and felt a twist of envy. She knew Jason didn't give a damn about Annie, but the thought that Annie was close enough to smell the tang of his after-shave which sent her weak at the knees whenever she was near him pissed her off greatly.

'You know you can go and scratch her eyes out if you want. I'd be more than happy to hold her down if you like?' Danni teased, as she glimpsed Jess's expression of longing at seeing Jason.

'Why do I hate him and love him all at the same time?' Jess whispered out of the corner of her mouth as he disappeared from view and Ruby appeared at her side.

'Because love and hate are two very close things. And Jess, you don't hate him. You're hurt and angry, but you don't hate him,' Danni assured her, patting her on the arm before giving her daughter Daisy a hug as she appeared from the other direction.

'What's wrong mum? Why are you hurt?' Ruby asked, looking between Jess and Danni as she caught the end of their conversation. 

'It's nothing Ruby. We were talking about someone else.' Jess lied smoothly, swiftly changing the subject to Ruby's day as they began to walk out of the school playground.

Back in the classroom, Annie perched on the edge of the seat which Jason had put beside his desk so he could speak to her. 'So, what did you want to see me about?' she asked, noticing with disappointment that Lucas's support worker Steph was hovering about pretending to look busy nearby.

'Lucas. Were you thinking it might be about something else?' Jason asked, deliberately waiting to see if she mentioned her complaint about him.

'Well um. I didn't know if it was about Ruby Shaw being moved? After all, you and her mum are having an affair - not exactly fair on your other pupils, is it?'

'No. Ruby won't be moving. I've asked that Lucas be removed instead.' Jason snapped, sitting back in his chair and crossing his arms as he watched her mouth open and shut like a trapdoor in surprise.

'But you're seeing Ruby's mum. It's not right you teaching Ruby. Not when it affects my boy!' 

'It doesn't affect your boy. In fact, it's your boy who is the disruptive influence in my class. I'll let you ask him later what he said yesterday which earned him a detention - one of many since I started.'

'But you can't do that! I'll take it further! Surely the head-teacher didn't agree to this?' Annie's face was a mixture of shock and anger as she tried to work out how her complaint had been turned on it's head.

'He has agreed to it. Steph has witnessed Lucas's disruptive behaviour and yesterday's behaviour was the final straw. She also had no idea I was seeing Ruby's mum - so if I was treating Ruby favourably Steph would have picked up on it.' Jason replied, his tone matter of fact so Annie couldn't argue with him, as he nodded in Steph's direction as she tidied away the paints they had been using in the last lesson.

'I suppose you're shagging her too are you?' Annie spat out, nodding her head in Steph's direction before she could stop herself.

'Hardly! I bat for the other side,' Steph replied, unthinkingly. 'Believe it or not, some of us are oblivious to Mr Orange's charms!' she added, as an afterthought whilst trying to stifle a laugh at the thought of her and Jason "shagging" as Annie so politely put it.

'Well I shall call in on the head teacher on my way out.' Annie replied sharply, standing up and shooting them both a poisonous look. 

'You do that Miss Bell.' Jason replied, trying to suppress a smile at the shock of what Steph had said.

'Oh don't worry I will!' Annie snorted, her nose stuck firmly in the air with indignation as she stormed out the door.

'Don't let the door bang you on the back of the head - the hinges are broke....' Jason called after her, as it slammed shut too quickly and he saw her shoot forward as it smacked her hard on the arse. 'Too late...' he grinned at Steph as he heard Annie shout fuck off to him over her shoulder as she headed off to speak to Mike.

'You'd better get the care-taker fix that door,' Steph remarked as they laughed together. 'I'm glad you forgot to do it before now. Seeing that has made my day. Never did I think I'd hear Annie Bell tell a teacher to fuck off. That's comedy gold!'

'Glad to be of assistance.' Jason replied drily, as he stood up and began to pack his things away. 'I'm going to shoot off or do you want me to stay and help you tidy up? I need an early night I think - I hardly slept last night,' he explained, stifling a yawn.

'Yeah, that's fine Jason. I'll finish up here and then get going myself. Are you going to try to speak to Jess?'

'I was thinking of maybe sending her some flowers? What do you think? I'm not very good at this relationship stuff and I don't want to do the wrong thing - especially as I've handled everything so spectacularly badly so far.' Jason asked with a wry grin as he put his bag down and looked questioningly at Steph.

Steph nodded at him in agreement. 'That's a good idea. I'm sure she'll come around.'

'I hope so...' Jason replied, thinking once more that he missed her presence and decided to stop on the way home to order a bouquet of flowers to be sent to her the following day at her workplace.

Three hours later after nearly falling asleep in the bath, Jason got in bed and checked his mobile. He'd been hoping Jess might text him, but she hadn't. He wavered whether to text her and eventually decided to wait until she'd received the flowers. He fell into a restless sleep and tumbled straight back into a dream about Jess. She was kissing him, kissing her way down his body as the ends of her beautiful red hair trailed across the bare skin of his stomach and downwards. She looked up at him, murmuring against his skin that she loved him as she worked her way back up to his mouth and kissed him, her tongue insinuating itself into his mouth as she began to make love to him, her eyes dark pools of desire as she looked straight at him and murmered his name under her breath. And then she was gone....His heart beat erratically in his chest as the panic ran through his body that he'd lost her and then as if by magic she reappeared in his dream and was with a man who he could only assume was Steve. He could see her walking off in the distance with him and he couldn't reach her. He woke up, his body soaked in sweat at the thought that he'd lost her forever. The bedclothes were wrapped around his lower body tightly, from where he'd been thrashing about in his sleep in panic. He lay there for a few moments whilst he waited for his heart to stop thudding hard in his chest. He thought about how he was feeling and knew he'd never felt like this about anyone else - the panic that he'd lost her was almost too much to bear and he knew he needed not only Jess, but also Ruby in his life.


	41. Chapter 41

As Jason walked past Mike's office the following morning he heard his name being called. Poking his head round the open door, he looked in and smiled. 'Did you want to speak to me?'

Mike looked at him. 'Yes. I did. Come in and close the door,' he gestured to the chair next to him.

Jason sat down and looked at him. 'What's up? Not Miss Bell again?'

'How did you guess?' Mike shot him a wry grin. 'We really have an issue here, Jason. Miss Bell came in here all guns blazing after speaking to you. She's not happy with how you spoke to her and said you were defensive and offhand with her. I understand that you're in your first year, so will make allowances for the fact that maybe you could have handled it better, but she does have a point. She also said Steph overstepped her authority by commenting and that nobody consulted her before a decision was made about Lucas,' he held up his hand as Jason opened his mouth to speak, to indicate he hadn't finished speaking. 'On reflection, I can see where she's coming from. I know we're both finding our feet in our roles, but we need to sort this out between us all so that everyone is happy.'

'So what are you suggesting?' Jason asked, half guessing that the solution involved Jess too.

'Well, I checked Lucas's file and he was moved from Mrs Smith's class into the one you now teach a few weeks into the Autumn term last year, just before you took over. It seems he wasn't getting on in his old class with the other children and was bullied by a couple of the lads who have since been expelled. Mrs Smith also found him difficult to handle, because her support worker was new and less experienced than Steph. The reasoning behind moving him into your class was so that he was with some of his friends and would be happier and though I agree he can be very disruptive, he likes you Jason - probably because you don't take any crap off him and he's happy. I'm suggesting he stays with you. But that means we still have an issue with Ruby.'

Jason sat back in his chair and felt sad for the boy, now that Mike had shared what had gone on the previous year and that he'd been bullied. 'God Mike, I feel awful for him. There I was worrying about Ruby's happiness and all I saw was a badly behaved kid with a mum who probably doesn't know how to handle him either. I really haven't dealt with this well at all, have I?'

'Jay, don't beat yourself up about it. I didn't know the whole story either as I wasn't headteacher in the Autumn, so I've not handled the situation well either. We have so many pupils here that I wasn't up to speed with every single one of them. I should have also dealt with it yesterday, rather than getting you to do it.' Mike said reassuringly, as he closed Lucas's file and dropped it into the class file in his cabinet.

'So, what should I do next? I want to do this right.' Jason asked, worried in case he made things worse if he did the wrong thing.

'I think you need to be honest firstly with Jess and tell her what is going on. Then maybe we should all arrange to meet - me, you, Miss Bell and Jess and try to find a solution where everybody is happy - or at least is in agreement. Jay, you need to wise up and speak to Jess before this goes too far and can't be fixed between you and her too. 

Jason nodded slowly. He wasn't entirely happy with Mike's suggestion that he meet Jess - especially as she seemed to hate him, but he had to admit he had a point. 'Ok. I'll try and catch her this morning and ask if she can come to see me at lunchtime and if she can we could all meet up this afternoon or tomorrow?'

'That sounds a very good idea, Jay. Let me know once you've spoken to her.'

Half an hour later Jason was in his classroom preparing for the day, when he glimpsed Jess and Ruby outside in the playground. Opening the door, he stepped outside and walked over to them, trying to ignore the cold expression on Jess's face. 'Would you be able to come and see me during lunchtime today? I need to speak to you regarding Ruby,' he asked politely, aching to hold her in his arms as she stared silently back at him, trying to hide how hurt she still was.

Ruby looked up at him, unsure whether she was in trouble as both Jason and her mum looked so serious.

'Don't worry Ruby, you're not in trouble,' Jason assured her, as he caught her worried expression and smiled down at her.

'Yes, I can ask for my lunch hour so it co-incides with Ruby's.' Jess replied, her tone business-like as she replied to him. 'Should I come to the classroom?'

'No. Come to reception and we can speak in the meeting room. I'll meet you at reception. Is that ok?' Jason asked, thinking if they met on neutral territory it would be more professional and there was less likelihood of them being disturbed by a pupil or another teacher.'

'Ok. See you then.' Jess replied, putting her arm around Ruby's shoulders ready to kiss her goodbye and making it obvious that it was the end of the conversation between the two of them.

It was 11am when Jess looked up from her desk to see a local Florists van draw up. The driver jumped out and took out the biggest bouquet of red roses she'd ever seen from the back of the van. 'Mrs Shaw?' he asked, as she opened the door to let him in, thinking at first he was in the wrong place, because she'd never received a bouquet of flowers before. 'Someone is keen...' he commented, handing her the bouquet and waving goodbye. Jess opened the small envelope which was tucked into the top of the flower display with a shaky hand and read Jason's handwritten message. 

'Ooh, they're beautiful!' Paul, her boss, exclaimed, wandering in from the kitchen area with a cup of coffee for them both. 'Are they from your new bloke?' he asked, picking up the card unthinkingly which she'd laid next to the bouquet.

'Yes. He's trying to get back into my good books, because he upset me. In fact, I'm still bloody furious with him.' She held out the bouquet to him 'here, take them home to your wife. I don't want them.'

'Jess, don't be silly! They must have cost a small fortune!'

'And so they should considering the shitty stuff he said to me.'

'Oh? What did he say?'

'I'd rather not discuss it to be honest, Paul. I put my trust in him and he let me down, that's all I'll say.'

'Big time, judging by that card Jess. Just don't be too hard on him - us guys can be total unthinking dicks. By the looks of things he's regretting what he said or did. Why don't you at least hear him out?'

'He's asked to meet me at lunchtime. It's to speak to me about Ruby, but I'll see where we go from there. He's really hurt me and I don't know if I can forgive him.'

'He's not screwing around is he?' Paul asked suspiciously, suddenly feeling protective of her by the way she was describing how upset she was with Jason.

'God, no! Nothing like that! He just said some really hurtful stuff.'

'Being a dick in other words?'

Jess burst out laughing, thinking that's exactly how Jason had been behaving. From the funny behaviour in the Lake District when he went all quiet on her because she said she'd seen him on YouTube, to the way he'd spoken to her about how he felt about her. 'Yep. Being a dick!'

'Well good luck with kicking him up the arse. Us blokes need that from time to time to appreciate what we have and I'll bet he's starting to realise, judging by that impressive bouquet,' he finished off his cup of coffee, before putting his jacket on over his overalls. 'Right, I'm off for the rest of the day. If you feel the need to take the rest of the day off after you've seen Jason, to shag each other senseless - if you forgive him of course. Just stick it down as half a days holiday in my diary next time you're in,' he winked naughtily at her and headed off to his appointments at two local building sites to oversee the work some of his employees had been doing in his absence.

Jess arrived at the school just before 1pm. She went straight to reception and realised she was feeling nervous and wasn't sure whether it was because she was worried about what Jason had to say about Ruby or whether it was the thought of seeing him again. She was just signing herself into the visitors book when she heard Jason's voice filtering along the corridor leading from the staff room.

'Hello, Mrs Shaw. Would you like to come through?' Jason asked formally, gesturing with his head to follow him. 

Jess followed him, thinking how handsome he looked in his smart black trousers and fine knit dark grey V neck sweater. She seemed to remember he was wearing something similar in The Circus from Abbey Road session on the YouTube videos she'd seen. She had found a dozen or so videos on there of him singing and playing the guitar. She'd loved watching it and also the sequences where he'd joked and talked directly to the camera. As she followed him, she felt the invisible pull of attraction as she tried to avert her eyes from looking at his backside as she walked behind him as he led the way. She was so busy trying not to stare at his backside that she cannoned straight into the back of him as he abruptly stopped and opened the door to a small meeting room.

Jason tried to stifle a grin as Jess nearly fell over him as they reached the door. 'Take a seat...' he said quietly, pointing to a chair to the side of the table as he pulled the chair out at the head of the table. 'Would you like a tea or coffee?'

'Coffee please...' Jess replied, trying to keep her tone steady.

'I'll just get you one and then we'll have a chat.' Jason replied over his shoulder as he walked over to the door to get her a drink.

Jess cast her eyes around the room as she waited, smiling as her eyes settled on a group of photos on the wall of the school council members. The photos were arranged in a line for each year group from KS1 through to KS6. She glimpsed her niece Daisy's smiling face on one of the photos and felt pride that she'd been chosen for her year group. Daisy was so like Danni she mused - single minded and always looking out for the under-dog, so was totally suited to the role.

Jason was back a few minutes later, placing their cups carefully on the table before sitting down at the end of the table, angling his body so he was facing her.

'So, what's this about?' Jess asked, feeling inexplicably nervous at his serious expression. 'Has Ruby done something bad?' 

Jason took off his black rimmed glasses and looked directly at her. 'No, she's fine. But there is an issue and one I should have been upfront with you about right from the start.'

Jess looked at him, wondering where all this was leading. 'In what way?' she took a sip of her coffee and looked straight at him.

'Lucas's mum made an official complaint after she'd seen us together in the Lake District. She said that she wanted Ruby moved from my class as I was treating her differently to the other kids and if we didn't move her then she was going to take it further.'

'And did you? Treat her differently, I mean?' Jess asked, wondering where exactly all this was leading and sensing that the way he'd spoken to her at her house was indirectly the reason.

'No. I'm sure I didn't, Jess. Steph didn't even suspect anything and she's there every day with me.'

'Well that's good.'

'Yes, but then I tried to sort it out and I've upset you - in fact you probably hate me and I've pissed off Lucas's mum. All because what I wanted to do was protect Ruby from being let down. God knows, her dad has done it enough. I didn't want to do the same.'

'But you're not her dad, Jay. It isn't your responsibility to worry about letting her down. You're her teacher and you should be thinking with your teacher head,' Jess looked at him with sympathy in her eyes, thinking it was lovely of him that he was worrying about Ruby, but his responsibility was mis-placed.

'Yeah, I know that now.' Jason leant forward with his elbows on his knees as he ran his hands through his hair. 'I've fucked everything up, because now I've let you down instead.'

Jess looked at him, comprehension running across her face as she worked out what he'd been trying to do. She didn't know whether she wanted to cry or scream at him for his stupidity. 'So by finishing it with me, you could say hand on heart you weren't treating her differently because we weren't together? Is that right?'

'Pretty much....'

'So why move Lucas instead? That seems pretty heartless to me, Jay.' Jess disliked Annie, but she could only imagine how angry she was.'

'Because she didn't want him being taught by me if Ruby was there too. I didn't want you to have to be forced to choose between us and Ruby.'

'So you decided to make the decision for me? God Jay, you are so bloody dense! Why the hell didn't you just tell me the truth? We could then have spoken to Ruby together and explained to her that she needed to be moved and why. After all, look how brilliant you were with her when she thought her dad didn't want her at the Lake District! We would have sorted something!'

'Jess, I'm so sorry. I really do like you a lot and I love spending time with you,' he said softly, trying to make things better between them. 'I didn't mean any of what I said about us, you have to believe me...'

'I'm still cross with you, Jay,' she said warningly, so he knew she wasn't going to just forgive and forget straight away.

'I know. And I get why,' he looked her in the eyes so she knew he meant it. 'Mike wants us to meet with him and Lucas's mum to discuss what we do next. Can we do that tomorrow after school?'

'Yes. It's not what I'd want for Ruby. But I get it and I'm sure once we explain to her she'll understand. Would you like to come over for dinner tonight and we sit down with Ruby and speak to her?'

Jason nodded, a huge grin crossing his face as he did so. 'Yes, I'd like that. I'd like that a lot, Jess. I've hated you being angry with me.'

Jess looked at him and gave him a flirty smile. 'Jason, I still am angry. You have some work to do now to show me I won't be mistaken if I forgive you. I still need to forgive you for what you said to me about how you felt about our relationship.'


	42. Chapter 42

Jess decided to return to work after meeting Jason. It seemed pointless to go home as Paul had suggested, as Jason would be teaching. He had offered to walk Ruby back home after school, so she would have time to call in at the supermarket on her way home to buy the ingredients for dinner. She was just arriving home as Jason and Ruby turned into her road. Jason was pushing his bike, his gaze looking down at Ruby as they talked ten to the dozen as she stopped and watched them both. She once again thought how similar they looked and how in tune they were with each other. Anyone looking in from the outside would assume they were father and daughter. 

'Hi Jess,' Jason said shyly as they reached the door, hoping she was going to be more amenable to him now that they'd spoken at the school. 'I see you got the flowers...' he nodded his head to the huge bouquet she was lifting out of the boot.

'Yes, thank you. Though it'll take more than flowers to get around me, Jason. Jess replied, winking at him so he would know she was half joking.

Ruby looked at them both in confusion. She knew by the way they were tip-toeing around each other now and the way they had been acting that morning that something was up. 'Is Jason not your boyfriend anymore?' she asked, hoping things were ok as she loved spending time with him.

Jess used the time while she unlocked the door to decide exactly how to answer. Did she still want Jason in her life as her boyfriend, she asked herself? She still loved him, but she was feeling pissed off with him after the events of the last few days. She turned to look at Ruby as the front door opened and smiled back at her. 'Yes, he is.'

Jason quietly exhaled a breath he hadn't realised he was holding at her words and felt a wave of relief run through him. As Ruby ran in the house ahead of them, he grabbed hold of Jess's hand and pulled her into his arms, 'thank fuck for that,' he murmered, kissing her on the forehead as he felt her arms go around his waist. 'Can I kiss you?' he asked, looking into her eyes as he asked permission, knowing she was still wary of him.

'Later...' Jess replied, pulling away from him and walking into the kitchen. She had a feeling that Jason would be disappointed, but she wasn't about to make things too easy for him.

Jason watched her walk away, thinking in disappointment that it looked like she wasn't just going to let him walk back in as if nothing had happened and that it looked like he had some making up to do.

Over dinner that evening Jess broached the subject with Ruby about moving classes. Pushing her dinner plate away, she fixed Ruby with a serious look. 'We need to speak to you about you being in Jason's class, Ruby.'

Ruby looked up from her dinner and gave Jess a confused look. 'Oh? Is this because of what Lucas said to me in class the other day? I didn't really understand, but Jason explained.

'Yes it is,' Jess replied, wondering exactly what it was that Lucas had said and guessed Annie was behind whatever it was. 'Because Jason and I are seeing each other you won't be allowed to stay in his class anymore.'

'But what happens if I want to stay?' Ruby's bottom lip trembled at the thought of moving.

'I'm really sorry, but it's just not allowed, Ruby.' Jason interrupted, just as Jess was going to reply. 'If me and your mum were just friends it would be ok. But because you came and stayed at my house at the lakes it means things are more serious and if you want to come and have sleepovers like before I can't teach you, because people will say I treat you better than the other pupils in the class. Does that make sense?'

Ruby nodded and looked marginally happier at his explanation. 'So they could say I got 10 out of 10 on my test, because you like me best?'

'Exactly, Ruby. Because I like you and mummy so much they could say I had made sure you did better than you had in a test than you actually had, for instance.' Jason looked at Jess and grinned softly at her face as he saw how happy she looked that he'd said how much he liked them both.

'Yeah, but they could say that even if I didn't have a sleepover, couldn't they?' 

'Well yes, I guess they could. But they would assume your mum is sleeping next to me if you're staying over - you know, like I explained when Lucas teased you and used that bad word?' Jason reminded her. 'If you're staying for weekends away and your mum slept next to me there's more likelihood I would give you better marks and things like that.'

Jess's eyebrows raised as she wondered exactly what word Lucas had used. She could hazard a guess it was probably a word that Ruby had never heard and that Jason had had to explain it in such a way so Ruby would understand what it meant. She guessed that by saying she was sleeping next to him in bed, that Jason was explaining it in a way that an eight year old would understand.

'Yes. I understand. So will I know anyone in my new class?' Ruby asked, feeling a little happier. She finished her dinner and looked at Jason as she waited for him to answer.

'Me and your mum are going to meet with the head-teacher and I'll make sure you can go in and meet everyone in your new class and we'll make sure that your new teacher finds someone for you to sit next to who you'll like. And if you ever want to come and see me, you'll still be able to come and see me at lunchtime if you want a talk or you feel lonely. Though I know you won't be lonely because you're the nicest girl I know.' Jason added at the end as an afterthought. 'Does that sound ok?'

Ruby nodded. 'I want to be in your class, but I want to spend time with you and mummy together more. And I want to sleepover at yours too.' 

Jason grinned widely. 'And I want that too. That's why we have to do what's right.' He looked at Jess, who was smiling as she watched the conversation taking place between the two of them. 'Jess, why don't you go and relax and me and Ruby will clear up seeing as you cooked, won't we Ruby? Shall I wash and you dry?' he asked, pushing his jumper sleeves up his arms so he didn't get them wet as he asked the question. Ruby picked up the tea towel and nodded vigorously in agreement.

'Well, I'm going for a shower then seeing as I'm not needed.' Jess grinned at them both, leaving the room so they could clear up together.

As Jason washed up Ruby looked at him, curiosity crossing her face. 'Was mummy crying in bed the other night because you argued about what to do, because you didn't want to upset me? I don't think she knew I could hear her.'

Jason swallowed deeply, thinking for someone so young she was extremely perceptive for her age, as he wondered whether to tell her the truth. 'I guess you're right. I think a lot of you and your mum and I didn't know what to do for the best.'

'Well isn't it obvious, duh brain? You want to be with mum and this way you get to see her. I'd much rather that! I want mummy to be happy, because she wasn't before she met you,' she looked up at him, her head cocked to one side as she put her arms around him to cuddle him.

Jason put the saucepan down onto the drainer that he was washing up and turned to look down at her as she put her arms around his waist for a cuddle. He felt his entire heart melt as his soapy hands stroked her head as it rested just below his chest. 'When did you get so wise, eh?' he asked her, thinking she was acting more grown up than he had - a sobering thought.

'Mum says I get it from her.' Ruby looked up and laughed cheekily.

'I think she's right.' Jason laughed and ruffled her hair affectionately, thinking it sure as hell wasn't from her dad.

Jess and Jason met with Mike and Annie the following afternoon and by the end of the hour everything had been sorted out. Ruby would be spending a morning in her new class the following day and then if all went ok she would start full time on the Monday morning. Jason had taken her to meet her new teacher during the lunch break that day prior to the meeting and all had gone well. Ruby seemed happy enough and Jason felt nothing but relief, thinking it was going swimmingly well so far.

Over the next week or so Jess and Jason didn't manage to see each other very much as Jason had a stag weekend in Amsterdam and flew out the Friday evening to join one of his oldest friends who he'd kept in touch with over the years. The others had flown out in the morning, but he'd flown out from Manchester airport after he'd finished working. They had texted back and forth over the weekend and he had came over for dinner midweek, but Jess was still keeping him a little at arms length. She had kissed him, but she was less tactile than she had been and Jason wondered if she was maybe going off him. Jess knew she was being slightly off with him, but at the back of her mind was that she just didn't know where she stood with him. She was so scared of him hurting her again that without meaning to she was still being cool with him and it was confusing the hell out of Jason. He knew after what he'd done he deserved it, but it confused him nonetheless.

On the Thursday morning before he started work he sent her a text to see if her and Ruby would like to go to London on the Saturday and stay there overnight, as it was bank holiday weekend.

Jess picked up her phone as it vibrated and read the message from Jason, before swiftly replying to say she was busy. She had agreed to pick her cousin Peter up from the airport on the Saturday and didn't want to let her mum down at short notice.

JESS: Really sorry. I'm busy that day. Can we do Sunday instead?

JASON: I'll check with Dougie. He said we can stay at his place so will check that he's still in Manchester then so we have the place to ourselves.

A few minutes lapsed and Jess's phone vibrated again.

JASON: Yes, that's fine. Will pick you and Ruby up at 10am on Sunday. Unless you want to stay at mine Saturday night so we can leave earlier?

JESS: No, will be busy all day and evening I think. Sunday better xx

Jason stood looking at his phone wondering what Jess was doing that was so important on the Saturday. He didn't recall her saying earlier in the week that she was busy. He swiftly keyed a reply to her.

JASON: OK. I look forward to seeing you both. Will you be ok sharing a bed with me again? I'm really trying here, Jess. I just want to hold you in my arms. Please don't hold me at arms length so that I can't.

JESS: I know. I want you to hold me in your arms too. Then I want you to kiss me all over....

JASON: WTF??? Am I forgiven then? I can think of nothing I want to do more.

JESS: Yes, you're forgiven. But that's just for starters....

Jason's eyes nearly fell out of his head at her messages and he had to will his erection down before replying to her.

JASON: Please don't send me messages like that. I'm about to try and get on my bike to go to work. You must surely know what you're doing to me here....

JESS: I know. That's why I said it. ;-)

Jess then put her phone in her bag and headed out the door to work, laughing to herself that she'd obviously left him in a state and enjoying every minute of it.


	43. Chapter 43

Jess set off at midday to go to Manchester airport to pick Peter up. She'd dropped Ruby off en-route at her mum's house rather than taking her to the airport, thinking if Peter's flight was delayed that she would get bored. Peter had moved to New Zealand when his work had a vacancy come up over there five years previously. As he was single it seemed too good an opportunity to pass up and he'd worked his way up to middle management in those five years. This was the second time he'd been home to visit since moving there. Jess had always got on well with him as there was only a year between them and she'd been looking forward to seeing him again. He'd put a letter in with her Christmas Card the previous year saying he would come to visit in the first half of the following year.

Drawing up at the airport car park, Jess walked across the bridge into the terminal and waited in the arrivals level. The monitor said his flight had just landed, so she knew she had around half an hour or so to wait. Checking her phone, she saw that Jason had texted her to remind her he would pick her and Ruby up the following day at 10am and that he was looking forward to seeing her. A smile crossed her face as she thought about him. He had messaged her after work on Thursday to let her know that he hadn't been able to stop thinking about her all day. On the Friday she had the day off and had arrived back from the gym to see the postman about to take a package back to the post office, as she'd been out when he'd knocked a few moments earlier. Ripping the packaging open, she saw it contained a box of very expensive looking French macarons, along with a message from him saying once again that he couldn't stop thinking of her. She had messaged him to thank him for the present, thinking he was really trying to make her feel special with the messages and gift. Jason had replied to her towards the end of the day asking if there was anything special she wanted to do while they were in London. She had mischievously replied that she wanted him to make good on his promise to kiss her all over at some point. Smiling widely when he'd replied back that he'd be doing a lot more to her than kissing her if she let him.

'Jess!!!!!' a voice called, tearing her thoughts away from Jason, as a large crowd of people emerged through the double doors leading from the baggage reclaim area and her cousin caught sight of her standing to one side as she waited for him.

'Peter!!!!' Jess shrieked, running towards him as he caught her up in a tight bear hug and squeezed all the air out of her.

'Oh my god! Look at you!!!!' Peter remarked, holding her at arms length so he could look her up and down. 'How gorgeous do you look! Being separated from Steve agrees with you, Jess. He took in her skinny jeans and light blue sweater and thought she looked amazing. 'You been working out cuz?' he asked, shooting her a sideways glance as she pointed at the Car Park sign and told him to follow her.

Jess flushed slightly and nodded. 'Yeah, I've lost a bit of weight and I've been going to the gym three times a week.'

'You can tell. So is this because you hooked up with a new bloke? James isn't it?' Peter asked, trying to remember the small amount of info his aunt had shared with him the last time he'd spoken to her to arrange who was picking him up at the airport.

'Jason. That's his name. Yes, he's really fit and Steve was less than complimentary when we split about how I looked. So I decided to do something about it.'

'Fit as in he keeps fit or fit as in handsome?' Peter joked, winking at her cheekily.

Jess blushed, thinking both expressions of the words would be how she would describe him. 'Both.'

'Well I'm glad. Will I maybe get to meet him while I'm here?'

'Maybe next week. Me and Ruby are away in London with him tomorrow night for a couple of nights.' Jess replied, shooting a smile in his direction as they reached the car park as she waved away his offer to pay, as he took his wallet from his back pocket. 

'Jess, I know this is really cheeky but is Michael's coffee house still open? Remember where we sometimes used to go if we were around Deansgate area?'

'Yeah, why? Do you want to swing by there?' Jess asked, remembering that was their favourite lunchtime or coffee pit stop if they were in that part of the city.

'That's all I've been bloody thinking about all the way here - well, apart from seeing you lot. You all came a close second,' he joked as he thought fondly about his aunt, Danni and Jess and his two nieces. 'I've found nowhere in New Zealand that makes coffees like they do,' he licked his lips and rolled his eyes as if he was in heaven, as he referred to his favourite Pistachio Crushed Ice coffee which they were well known for,'

'Your wish is my command,' Jess laughed, as they got in the car and she started the engine.

An hour later they were sitting in the busy cafe and drinking their coffees. Peter was already on his second cup and eating a chocolate croissant. 'So, how's my joint favourite niece, he asked as he referred to Ruby, as he wiped his mouth with the back of his hand and looked at Jess.

'She's doing great. She's not really having contact with Steve as he doesn't want her in his life.' Jess shrugged sadly and sighed as she took a sip of her latte.

'He always was a twat, Jess.' Peter's brows knitted together in annoyance as he recalled how much he'd disliked Steve.

'You could have said when I was going out with him. It would have saved me the bother of getting married and then divorced.'

'You wouldn't have listened - you were so in love. Besides, if you had listened you wouldn't have Ruby. So it was worth it just for that.' He leant over and squeezed her hand supportively giving her an affectionate smile. Draining his coffee, he stood up and put his arm around Jess's shoulder, pulling her towards him as she stood up too. Kissing her on the cheek, he grinned at her, 'thanks for letting me stop here. I really appreciate it.'

Jason walked across the road opposite the coffee house, his sunglasses pulled down over his eyes from the glare of the sun. Stepping onto the pavement, he glanced into Michael's, idly thinking about getting one of their Chai latte's as he glanced into the window to see if there was a big queue, like there often was. He double took as he realised that Jess was sitting at a corner table sideways to him. She was with a man who squeezed her hand in his and then kissed her as they stood up together. He was a similar age he guessed to Jess and was extremely handsome with striking strawberry blonde hair and was tall and well built like someone who lifted weights. He dwarfed Jess in both height and sheer size. For a moment he stood rooted to the spot, thinking that explained why she was busy that day and could it be the reason she seemed to be a bit 'off' with him most of the week? He felt a surge of pure jealousy run through him as they moved away from the window and disappeared out of the back entrance of the cafe in the opposite direction to him, Peter's arm still slung loosely over Jess's shoulder as he told her a funny anecdote about New Zealand life and she burst out laughing and looked up at him.

As they drove back to her mum's house where Peter was staying for three weeks, they chatted non stop about his life in New Zealand. 'Your mum and dad would be so proud of all you've achieved,' Jess remarked, giving him a sad smile as she referred to his parents who had died in a car crash a couple of years before he went to New Zealand. The accident was one of the reasons Peter had taken up the job offer, as he'd lost both parents and had no brothers and sisters it made sense to go there for a better life.

Peter sighed deeply as he thought about his parents. 'I keep thinking they'd really like my girlfriend Isla and it does make me sad now and then,' he replied, referring to the girl he'd been seeing for nearly a year.

'How come she didn't come with you? I'd have thought you'd love to have introduced us to her and take her sightseeing.

'Her new job wouldn't let her take the time off as it's their busiest time and I couldn't go when she was allowed holiday, so it made sense for me to come and then bring her back here next year.

Jess smiled over at him as she navigated the streets. 'Honeymoon maybe?'

Peter laughed. 'Well I need to propose first. But you never know - I think she's the one. And how about this Jason? You've not told me much about him. Serious is it?'

Jess shook her head, giving an awkward shrug at the same time. 'Do you know... I have no idea. We had a huge argument last week because of how he was behaving. I know he likes me and I love him, but he's just so complicated. He's had a lot of short relationships in the past and only one serious one and I think he has serious trust issues with women - or he certainly has had in the past. Issues where they're with him for the wrong reasons and it's messed with his head. He is the loveliest, kindest man and Ruby adores him which is half the battle. But I think hell would freeze over before he ever put a ring on a woman's finger. But that's fine as I don't want that much of a commitment either.'

'And how does he feel about you having Ruby?' Peter asked, noticing she'd also made a strange comment about women being with him for the wrong reasons and wondering what she meant by that.

'Oh, he's got no issues there. They get on so well, but that's not surprising as he's her teacher. Well, he was until things got more serious between us. So she's in another class now.' she noticed, the slightly shocked expression cross his face when she'd said Jason was Ruby's teacher not so long ago. 

Pulling into a parking space in front of her mum's house, Jess jumped out the car and opened the boot so he could retrieve his case. 'I've got to pop home for an hour or so. I said I'd bring over a desert for dinner tonight and I just need to get it made and then I'll be back over. Ok?'

Peter nodded in agreement and gave her a quick hug goodbye as she jumped back in the car to drive home.

As Jess let herself in the house, Jason was driving across town to her house around fifteen minutes behind her. He'd gone into the coffee shop and bought a coffee - not that he felt like drinking it, but he needed time to work out how he felt about seeing Jess with another man. Thinking back, the man hadn't kissed her on the lips, but on the cheek, but the way he'd slung his arm across her shoulder indicated someone she knew well and he knew he had to get to the bottom of it. Even if it meant coming face to face with the mystery man and having to be polite to him if he opened the door. His hands shook slightly as he took a sip of his coffee while he tried to work out how he really felt about Jess. The fact that he actually felt devastated that she might have found someone else ran through the forefront of his mind. He also felt angry at himself for not vocalising how he really felt about her. 

Jess heard a knocking at the door as she took all the ingredients out of the fridge for the Tirami-su which she was making. Wiping her hands on her apron to dust off the veil of icing sugar which had scattered on them, she opened the door and visibly jumped as she saw Jason standing on her doorstep. 'Oh, hi Jason! This is a surprise!'

'So I gather...' he replied, his tone steady as she looked at him in confusion at seeing him there. 'Can I come in or are you busy?' he looked over her shoulder, half expecting Mr Blonde and Beautiful to appear.

'Well, um I am a bit... I'm making desert to take to my mum's. But come through and I'll make you a coffee while I get on with making it,' she gestured with her head that he should follow her into the kitchen.

Jason followed her, feeling a bit perturbed. He was half expecting her to say she was busy in bed with the man from the coffee shop, but busy making Tirami-su was the last thing he'd expected her to say - well, unless he was into some strange desert games in the bedroom.

Jess flicked the kettle on and took a mug down from the cupboard. 'Everything ok?' she asked, noticing that Jason was looking everywhere but at her, as he wondered whether she was on her own. 

'Not really, Jess. I saw you in Michael's earlier.'

'Were you following me?' Jess snapped, not really understanding what he was talking about.

Jason looked back at her in confusion. 'Of course I bloody wasn't! I live across the other side of the city to you. I was in the area getting some bits for tomorrow and Michael's is near my flat. Why were you in that part of the city?'

'Am I not allowed to be?' Jess shoved his mug towards him and stood with her back against the worktop, her arms folded defensively in front of her as she stared at him. 'Is there some kind of rule that says if I live in the shit part of the city I'm not allowed in your more flash part of the city?'

Jason ignored her last remark. 'Jess, you were with another man and he kissed you and put his arm around you.' I was jealous. Are you fucking him too?'

Jess burst out laughing at him saying he was jealous. 'That's hilarious!' she shook her head in wonderment that only a week or so ago that he was finishing it and now he was saying that he didn't like the thought she was sleeping with someone else. 'It's not often you lay your cards on the table like this, Jay and if it makes you feel better I'm not fucking him as you so politely put it. You were jealous, were you?'

'I was.' he looked at her from under his eyelashes. 'I can't remember ever feeling like that before and I didn't like it.'

'Good.' she gave him a wicked grin, thinking the fact that he was confessing that he'd never known the feeling before meant he cared about her.

'Good? Jess, it didn't feel good!'

'Well now you know how shit I felt when you told me I was just sex to you!' she batted back at him, taking a sip of her coffee and regarding him over the top of the mug. 

'But I've explained to you why I stupidly said that. You mean far more to me than any other woman I've been with. Jess. Surely you know how I feel about you?'

'No, I don't Jay, because you don't tell me.'

'I love you, Jess! I'm in love with you and it's stupidly took me to see you with someone else to make me realise. I was starting to realise when we'd split that I'd fallen in love with you because I missed you so much and then when I saw you with him I realised I don't want to lose you and how much I love you.'

Jess's mouth dropped open in surprise, putting her mug down behind her she turned back to look at him, noticing his chest was heaving with emotion as he verbalised how he really felt. 'That's quite a speech. What did you just say? I want to hear it again,' she whispered, thinking she surely had misheard what he'd said.

'You heard....'

'Say it again...I just want to check I heard right.'

Jason moved towards her and looped his arms around her waist, looking deep into her eyes. 'If you tell me who it was you were with at Michael's, I'll repeat what I said.'

'Peter. My cousin. The reason I was busy today was because he's flown over from New Zealand for a holiday and I had to pick him up from the airport and then I was going to mum's for dinner with him. Now I've told you what you want to know. So what did you say to me? I want to hear it again from your lips.'

'Jess, I'm in love with you,' he murmered against her ear, moving his mouth down to kiss her on the lips as he felt her lips curve up into a smile against his as his tongue began to play with hers.

As their lips parted, she looked naughtily at him. 'We have around an hour and no Ruby. You can either help me make desert or take me to bed. Which will it be?'


	44. Chapter 44

Jason stepped forward so that Jess's back was pressed against the worktop. 'What kind of question is that? Make desert or make you scream? I know which I'd rather do.'

'Make desert?' Jess joked, looking up at him flirtatiously as she chewed on her bottom lip so she didn't burst out laughing at the expression of surprise flit across his face. Reaching up, she placed a hand either side of his cheeks and drew him down to kiss her. 'Make me scream....' she murmered against his mouth, as their kiss deepened and he pulled her towards him so that their pelvises were pressed against each other, so she was in no doubt as to what he wanted to be doing.

Pulling away slightly, he looked down at her. 'Are you going to show me your bedroom or are we just going to get down and dirty here on the kitchen floor?' he raised an eyebrow cheekily at her as he waited for her answer.

Reaching down to take her hand in his, she smiled up at him. 'This way. Follow me.' As they reached her bedroom, she felt inexplicably nervous as she wondered what he must be thinking as her house was so tiny.

Jason sat down on the bed and looked around as he took in his surroundings. 'It's beautiful,' he remarked, knowing by the look on her face that she was worried that he'd be comparing it to his own huge bedroom. It was decorated in a pale dove grey colour and though small, it was tasteful and reflected her personality.

'Thank you,' Jess replied, moving to stand between his legs. Reaching up, she tugged her sweater over her head and then did the same with his t-shirt. 'I love your chest Jay, she remarked, dragging her fingertips over it and tip-toeing them around his nipples as she pushed him down on the bed, hovering over him as she began to kiss his chest where her fingertips had just been, her mouth and tongue then moving down over his stomach. 'I love this too...' she whispered, as her mouth reached the patch of dark hair leading into his jeans as she continued kissing further downwards, before abruptly stopping and looking back up at him as she reached the waistband of his jeans.

Jason took hold of her hands and moved them to the button on his jeans. 'Jess, I want you...' he trailed off, his voice thick with emotion as she popped the button on his jeans followed by the zip and dragged them slowly down his legs, before he felt her fingertips tread slowly back up his thighs and teasingly over his boxer shorts. 

Jess stood up, undoing the button on her own jeans and unzipping them as Jason sat up and slid them down her legs, before pulling her back on top of him as he lay back on the bed. She sat astride him, deliberately wriggling slightly as she felt under her thigh how much he wanted her.

God, don't do that!' he groaned loudly, as she deliberately did it again, 'you carry on doing that and you won't be screaming, because I'll be no good for anything.'

Jess reached around and undid her bra, dropping it on the floor beside the bed and grinned naughtily as his hands went immediately to her breasts as she leant over to kiss him. 'Talking of loving things. I love these...' he whispered against her mouth, as he ran the palm of his hand upwards and over them, his fingertips kneading at her nipples. Jess pulled her hair tie out of her hair and shook her head so that her hair fell around her shoulders and resumed kissing him, her tongue playing with his as his hands reached around to cup her bottom, so he could hold her tightly against him. She wriggled again and heard the sharp intake of breath emanate from his mouth as she did so, his hand moved back to her nipple and squeezed it gently between his fingertips, causing shockwaves to run through her as she moaned softly against his mouth.

Moving back off down his body, Jess slid is boxer shorts off and stood in front of him in just her knickers.

'Jess, you are so beautiful..' Jason trailed off, as he half sat up to look at her and noticed her blushing partly because of his compliment and partly because she wasn't used to being in charge. He reached forward to take her hand and grinned as she shook her head and pushed him back down on the bed and sat astride him. 'Oh, jeez,' he trailed off his head arching back into the duvet as she slowly inched downwards until their pelvises met and began to slowly move up and down.

Almost immediately she began to climax around him as he held her steady around her waist and his blue eyes looked her straight in the eyes as he watched her come undone in front of him. It was such a turn on, he realised - watching the woman he was in love with lose all of her inhibitions in front of him.

As he rolled her onto her back she looked deep into his eyes, her body still trembling with the aftershocks of her climax. 'Jay, I love you...' she murmered, as he began to kiss all the way down her body.

Jason kissed and sucked at her breasts and carried on until he reached her stomach and stopped, looking up at her. 'I love you too Jess,' he replied softly, kissing her on the mouth before moving back down her body until he reached the apex of her thighs and then disappeared into the gap, his tongue bringing her almost immediately to yet another mind blowing orgasm as she shouted his name at the top of her voice again. 

'I want you now, Jay. Don't make me wait anymore,' she groaned as his fingers trailed against the inside of her thighs, before he moved back up her body as she asked and they began to move together in perfect unison. 

Jason tangled his hands in her hair as he hit the point of no return as she began to tremble against him. He held her tight in his arms so they were skin on skin. 'Come with me, Jess,' he murmered against the shell of her ear, one hand disappearing down between her legs as he touched the point where he already knew was guaranteed to send her over the edge. She bit down softly on his earlobe to silence her cries, and her tongue ran round his earlobe in circles as her climax joined his in blessed relief.

'Whoa, that was intense..' he whispered against her ear as he lay down on his stomach next to her on the bed, his hand reaching up to cup her breast as he cuddled up to her and dropped a kiss onto her lips. His head suddenly shot up so he could look her in the eye. 'Did I just dream it or did you tell me just then that you loved me? Was that the heat of the moment?' he propped his head up in the palm of his head as he studied her and waited for her answer.

Jess turned over on her side so she was facing him and gave him a gentle smile. 'Yes, I love you, Jay.'

His mouth curved up into a smile which lit up his whole face. 'And did I kiss you everywhere like you asked me to?'

Jess wound her arms around his neck as she pondered on her answer. 'I can't remember. I may need you to try again over the weekend, just so I can be sure.'

'Well, you'll have to be a damn sight quieter than you were just then or we'll wake Ruby up when we're in London.'

'You can clamp your hand over my mouth next time,' Jess joked as she trailed her fingers along the patch of hair in his stomach.

'You really are a noisy so and so, aren't you?' he twirled one of her red curls in his as he looked at her and winked. 'Who would have thought that quiet and polite Jess was so noisy in bed.'

Jess blushed in embarrassment at his statement. 'I'm really sorry. How many times have we made love? Three times? Well it's nothing like I've ever experienced before. God, I sound so stupid!' she rubbed the palms of her hands over her eyes in embarrassment as she tried to explain things from her perspective.

Jason studied her, wondering whether half the reason she'd held back slightly was because Steve had been her one and only partner. 'I take it he was more worried about his own needs, rather than yours?'

'Yeah, it wasn't great. Of course at first when you're in love and all that, you don't question things. It was only when you get older and other women talk about it and you read stuff in magazines that you realise maybe things aren't that great. Now I'm with you I realise just what I've been missing.' She heaved a sigh, knowing that it wouldn't be long before she was missed at her mum's house. 'I guess I need to get to my mum's house or they'll be wondering where I've got to,' she picked up her mobile phone to check the time. 'Do you want to come over too? We can stop en route and pick up a desert, so they won't realise we've basically spent the last hour in bed together.'

'I'd love to, if you think that would be ok?'

'I'm sure it will be, Jay. Will you come back here afterwards to stay the night?' she asked, her voice raising an octave as she realised that she didn't want him to go straight home - not after his declaration that he loved her.

'Or you and Ruby could come to mine as it's bigger?' he asked, hoping she would know he wasn't trying to show off his wealth. It just made more sense to stay there that night and then leave in the morning. Plus, he could already see his feet would be poking out the end of her small double bed. 

'As long as that's ok? I'll get our stuff together and then pack it on your boot and we can the go straight to yours once we've had dinner.'

'That's fine with me. Jess, now that we've sorted out our differences and Ruby is happy in her new class I'd really like to spend more time together.'

'And I'd like that too.' Jess put the flat of her hands on either cheek and kissed him softly in response to his question. 'Jay, I love you.'

'And I love you too,' he replied, kissing her on the lips as he wondered why the hell it had taken him this long to really appreciate how much he did love her.


	45. Chapter 45

As they drew up at Maggie's house, Jason looked at Jess doubtfully. 'Are you sure it'll be ok with your mum me turning up uninvited?'

'Of course! I should have asked you along in the first place, but I was still so pissed off with you when I was arranging it that I didn't ask you. And I should have done.'

'Well I sort of deserved it. I was an arsehole so I can't say I blame you.' Jason shrugged and looked across at Jess apologetically as she held on tight to the bowl of Tiramisu as it sat on her lap. They had decided to quickly make the desert after they'd emerged from upstairs as Jess pointed out that some of the ingredients would spoil if they didn't use them.

Jason followed Jess into her mum's house, his gaze taking in the multitude of photos everywhere of Danni and Jess as little girls and as they grew older. He heard Maggie call out that they were in the garden as Jess called out to see where they all were.

All heads turned to greet them as they made their way into the garden and Jason came face to face with Peter. Now that he could see him clearly, there was no mistaking the resemblance to Jess, even though his features were slightly closer to Danni's.

Maggie got up to greet them, hugging them both before heading into the house to fetch drinks for them both, while Jess took Jason over to meet Peter. 

Peter looked momentarily dumbstruck as he recognised Jason. 'Are you who I think you are?' he asked, extending his hand out to shake Jason's as his eyes narrowed while he tried to work out where he'd seen him before.

'And who do you think I am?' Jason asked teasingly, as he shook his hand firmly.

'Are you that one who dances in Take That? Jason? My last girlfriend before I left for New Zealand dragged me along to one of your concerts. I think it was The Circus?'

Jason sat down on the garden chair beside Peter and chuckled lightly. 'I'd like to think I did a bit more than dancing, but yeah that's me.' It always amused him when men always said to him that they'd been dragged along to their concerts - almost like they were too embarrassed to ever admit that they wanted to go in the first place.

Peter blushed a shade of deep red in embarrassment and looked apologetically at Jason. 'God, I'm so sorry. I didn't mean it to sound like that! You were brilliant - the unicycles, the elephant. It was amazing! I remember you played the guitar and you sang some solos, but the dancing well, anyone can see that's what you were born to do.'

Jason took a drink of home-made lemonade from the tray of drinks which Maggie had brought out into the garden, before heading down the garden with Danni to play with the girls. She figured that Peter and Jason should get to know each other. 'Yeah, that was my passion when I joined the band. I belonged to a Breakdance group and that was where I was spotted.'

Peter swivelled around and looked accusingly at Jess. 'You never told me that Jason is the same Jason as in Take That, when you were planning on telling me about him? It's not like you didn't have plenty of time earlier.'

'Because I'm not in Take That anymore. I left after the following tour - Progress. We performed at the Olympics closing ceremony, because we were all contracted to do that, or to be honest I'd have left earlier. I left not long after the Olympics,' Jason interrupted, looking at Jess as he realised that he felt touched that she'd not mentioned anything about his previous life to Peter. That in itself indicated to him that she really did love him for who he was now and not who he was a few years earlier.'

'Why would you give that up? You must have been earning so much money and shagging any girl you wanted. You're mad!' he looked at Jason, an incredulous expression on his face as he saw out of the corner of his eye Jess flinch at his mention of other women. 'Sorry Jess, that was uncalled for. I opened my mouth without thinking when I said that,' he shot Jess an apologetic glance.

'Happiness, Peter. Money doesn't buy you happiness - in fact you can be one of the richest people in the country, which we were at the time, and feel like the loneliest person in the country at the same time. I wanted to meet someone nice and fun who loved me for me and that wasn't going to happen while I was in the band,' he felt Jess softly squeeze is hand as if to say she got what he meant.

Peter sucked down on his bottom lip as he thought about what Jason was saying. 'Yeah I get that. So, where does Jess fit into all this? After all, her dad isn't here to ask the question so I will. No matter how old Jess is if her dad was still around he'd be concerned that someone like you was going out with his daughter,' after Jess had told him Jason blew hot and cold, he wanted to know for his own satisfaction that Jess wouldn't get hurt and nor would Ruby.

Jason looked him straight in the eye, thinking Peter wasn't shy in making it known that he wasn't to mess with Jess's feelings. He squashed down the thought that Peter was younger than him and had been out of the country for five years, so that hardly gave him a right to ask whether he was serious about Jess or not. He had to admit he liked him and he had balls to ask him that question, considering he was still looking at him slightly star-struck. 'I love Jess. I might not have behaved like that recently, but I do. Does that answer your question?' he sat back in the chair and waited to hear if Peter had any more concerns.

'And Ruby? What about her?' Peter nodded towards the end of the garden where Ruby and Daisy were playing on the swings and shrieking at the tops of their voices as each dared the other to go higher.

Jason hesitated, wondering whether to tell the truth about how he felt about her. He leant forward and massaged his eyelids with his fingertips. He could feel Jess move her hand to rest in the square of his back, her fingertips running over his back in small circles, as if she was telling him whatever he said was cool with her - because however he felt about Ruby it was still more than Ruby's own father felt about his daughter. 'God, this probably sounds weird... even to my ears it sounds weird....'

Peter took a sip of his beer and looked at Jason appraisingly, thinking he certainly didn't seem to be blowing hot and cold judging by his declaration that he loved Jess. 'Go on....' he prompted him, as he saw the indecision on Jason's face.

'I love her too. I despise Steve for the way he treats not only Ruby, but Jess too. I've not been lucky enough to have kids, but I think a lot of Ruby and I feel protective of her. I love Jess and Ruby is part of her and she's an amazing child. I can't believe that Steve does not see that!'

Jess looked up as she heard her mum calling her over to have a word with her. Setting off down the garden, she waved at Ruby who had been so busy having fun that she'd only just noticed Jess was there. She turned over in her head what Jason had said not only about his feelings on Steve's treatment of Ruby, but also that he loved Ruby. She knew Jason had a soft spot for Ruby - that much was obvious, but she was feeling somewhat gobsmacked that he'd told Peter he loved Ruby too.

There was silence as Peter's mouth dropped open in surprise. 'Blimey! You're full of surprises aren't you? Next, you'll be telling me you're going to move in together!'

Jason shrugged nonchalantly and took a sip of his lemonade as he pondered what exactly to say. 'Never say never....,' he said quietly.

Peter grinned at Jason as they each took a drink. 'Sorry about giving you the third degree. I guess I feel protective of Jess and Danni as they lost their dad.'

'Ah, it's fine. Though you nearly dropped me in it there.'

'Oh, in what way?'

'Saying I'll be asking them to move in with me. I was going to ask Jess if she'd consider it this weekend. I guess things have been said and done over the last couple of weeks which made me realise I want to be with her more - and Ruby of course. Do I need to ask you permission about that before I ask her?' Jason joked, winking at Peter as he asked the question.

'Ha ha. No, but if you ever want to marry her you might have to ask me or her mum's permission if you want to do it properly - just so we know your intentions are honourable.' Peter joked back as he leant forward to clink glasses with Jason as if congratulating him.

Jason chewed on his lip thoughtfully at Peter's words. 'Now that is a step too far! That scares the life out of me. Asking Jess to move in a huge step for me,' he stopped talking as Ruby came hurtling down the garden towards him as she realised Jason was there with her mum. He stood up to greet her as she reached him and threw her arms around his waist in excitement at seeing him there. Even now, it still felt slightly surreal having her hug him he thought to himself, as he dropped a kiss on the top of her head and returned the hug.

'Mum said we're coming to stay at yours tonight and then going to stay at Howard's house tomorrow. Will Eloise be there?'

'I'm afraid not. But when we get home later we can plan where you'd like to visit over the weekend if you like?' he looked at her as she stepped away from him to have a drink of her lemonade and nodded in agreement.

As they made their way back to Jason's flat at 8pm, Ruby excitedly told him about her new class and the new friends she had made. Jason felt a thread of relief run through him that she was happy in her new class. 'So, you're happy in your new class then?' he asked her as they drew up into his parking space outside the apartments.

'Yes. I'm happy,' she looked at Jason as he got their bags out of the boot. 'Of course I'd rather still be in your class, but for mummy and me to see you outside of school I know I can't be. And it's ok.'

Jason and Jess shared a look of relief that she was happy. 'Well I'm glad you're happy Ruby. And though I miss you in my class, it more than makes up for it that we can hang out outside of school. Talking of which, I'm going to bring my guitar so we can have a little lesson this weekend. How do you fancy that?' he ruffled her hair affectionately as he asked the question and she nodded enthusiastically.

Once Ruby was in bed in the spare room, Jason opened a bottle of wine and put on some music. Sitting down on the sofa, he stretched out with his back resting against the arm and pulled Jess into his arms so that she sat in the gap between his legs, her back resting on his chest. Dropping a spine tingling kiss on the area where her neck met her shoulder, which he knew made her tremble he angled her head to look at him. 'Jess, I have a question to ask you. Will you and Ruby move in with me?' he asked, his voice slightly trembling with nerves as he awaited her answer.


	46. Chapter 46

Jess sat there for a moment in dumbfounded silence before she replied. 'Jay, are you sure this is what you want? This is such a big step for you. You've not lived with anyone since you were in the band the first time around and not only that, but you'll have another man's child living with you too.'

'I've thought about all of that, Jess. This is what I want.' Jason replied earnestly, wanting her to know he had thought it through. His flat felt so quiet without their presence and he felt lonely - normally he was completely fine with his own company and has been for years. But since being away together in the Lake District he realised he wanted them more permanently in his life and missed them when they weren't with him.

Jess massaged her temples as she tried to keep a sensible head as she thought about his question. On the one hand she could think of nothing she wanted more and her heart was telling her to say yes, but her head was saying it was very sudden - after all, he'd only just told her he loved her. She knew for him to be in love was a big thing, but she wanted to be sure he really meant it and wouldn't have a change of heart later on. She turned around to look at him as his fingers played with one of her curls as it lay against her shoulder. 'Jay, it's just so very sudden. Only last week you were finishing our relationship. I can't risk moving in here and then you changing your mind a week later.'

'But I won't...' Jason looked at her appealingly, unsure what to say to change her mind. 

'Well how about we go away this weekend and then it's only another couple or so weeks until half term and we have a week off. We could come and stay for the week and then if it goes ok we'll take it from there. What do you think?' she chewed on her lip as she wondered whether she was saying the right thing.

'And you'll stay for the weekends in between too?' Jason asked, warming to her idea. It did make sense what she was saying and he could understand why she felt nervous.

'Yes. If all goes well at the end of half term we can ask Ruby if she's ok with it too?' Jess smiled softly at him, her heart turning over with love as she gazed into his blue eyes. 

Jason's mouth twisted slightly in disappointment as he nodded slowly. 'Yeah, I get it. It's just a bit too soon, eh?'

Jess turned over fully so she was lying face to face with him on the sofa, their bodies pressed together. She kissed him softly and wound her arms around his neck. 'Yes. You only told me today that you love me. And now hours later you want me to move in with you. It's just a bit sudden. That's all. Plus I know Steve isn't really in her life, but I will have to broach it with him too, because he is her father.'

Jason smiled at her and winked dirtily. 'There's no point taking you to bed and try to persuade you?' he joked, as he began to kiss her and slipped his tongue suggestively into her mouth. 'I can be very persuasive when I put my mind to it.'

Jess pulled back from him and laughed out loud at his cheekiness. 'You can take me to bed and fuck me all night, but I'm not changing my mind.'

Jason burst out laughing at hearing her using a swear word. 'That's not a word I've heard you use before,' he teased, as she blushed furiously at using the word in front of him unthinkingly. 'Now that's a challenge. Fuck you all night, eh? I think I'll give it a try!' He laughed aloud again as Jess squeaked in surprise as he stood up and slung her over his shoulder, fireman style so that her legs hung over the front of his chest. He grasped her legs tightly in his hands so her front lay face down against his back. Jess began to beat him on the backside with her hands in a futile attempt to stop him, as he strode purposefully out of the lounge and into the bedroom, where he deposited her in the middle of the bed. 'So, where do you want to start? Here? Or the bathroom?' he asked, his eyebrow raised as he waited for her answer.

Jess wriggled backwards on the bed so her back rested against the head-board and ran her tongue over his lips, biting the bottom lip with her teeth as she pretended to think seriously about his question. 'In the shower. I want you in the shower,' she said decisively, watching as he pulled the t-shirt over his head, before unzipping his jeans in double quick time and throwing them on the floor.

'First. You want me in the shower first....' he trailed off, leaning forwards to where her legs lay outstretched in front of her. He pulled her towards him by the ankles, so she slid back down the bed and ended up spread eagled in front of him.

'Ooh, I like this masterful Jay!' Jess quipped as he grabbed hold of her legs and began to peel her jeans down her legs, throwing them on the floor on top of his own. Jess sat up and pulled her own t-shirt over her head, quickly followed by her bra as Jason did the same with her black knickers. 'Jay, lock the door. Ruby...' Jess murmered, suddenly remembering Ruby was fast asleep at the other end of the hallway. 

Jason locked the door as Jess slid off the bed and beckoned him into the shower. 'Jess, you are a hussy...' he grinned, following her into the bathroom as she switched the shower on full blast and stood facing him, a wicked grin on her face, a bottle of shower gel in one hand and a sponge in the other. 

Jess awoke and stretched lazily in the bed as she grasped in the darkness for her mobile phone to check what the time was. Switching it on, she saw the time was just past 3am and realised from the dim light emanating from her phone that Jason wasn't in bed next to her. She sat up in bed and shoved her wild curls away from her eyes as she wondered where he was. A tired smile crossed her face as she thought back to their amazing marathon sex session which had started in the shower and ended up with them sprawled on top of the bed as he had made her come over and over with his fingers and tongue. He'd continuously batted her hands and mouth away whenever she tried to drive him to distraction in return. 'By the time I've finished with you Jess, you'll do anything I ask,' he'd laughed, his head disappearing between her legs yet again as he lobbed pillow at her. 'You'll be needing that to press against your mouth to keep you quiet,' he'd laughed, as she felt his tongue on her yet again and groaned aloud at the sensations coursing through her. She'd been forced to bury her lips in his neck to silence her cries again as he'd worked his way back up her body and she had wound her legs around the back of his go draw him closer to her as they began to move together in perfect unison.

Ten minutes later Jason wasn't back, so after checking the bathroom she padded out into the hallway, wondering if he was in the kitchen making a drink. She knew by now he was a fairly light sleeper compared to her and though he managed to fall asleep, he often woke a few hours later and had to read to get back to sleep. She'd realised this the weekend they'd been away in the lakes and found him reading in bed at 4am, his glasses perched on his nose as he read in the dim light.

After checking the kitchen and lounge she noticed a very dim light trickling out from a gap in the door of the room where Ruby slept and softly pushed the door open. Ruby's bedside light was on and Jason was fast asleep in his pyjamas on top of her duvet, a book lying open on his chest. Ruby lay under the duvet also fast asleep with her head angled slightly towards him. Jess's heart tripped as she saw them there and she guessed she'd probably slept through Ruby having a bad dream. But Jason must have heard her as he slept less deeply.

Jason stirred as Jess crouched next to him by the bed, her finger stroking his cheek softly so she didn't wake him suddenly. 'Oh god, I didn't realise I fell asleep here,' he whispered, sliding off the bed and standing up, closing the book as he did so.

They tip-toed out of the room and made their way back to his bedroom. 'Did she have a nightmare?' Jess asked, sliding under the covers and moving across the bed so she could cuddle up against him.

Jason took off his pyjama top and held his arm out so she could lay her head against his shoulder, before curling it around her so he could draw her towards him for a kiss. Jess wound her arm around his waist as he dropped a gentle kiss on her mouth. 'Yes. I'm surprised you didn't hear her. She screamed really loud and you were fast asleep, so I didn't want to wake you as you looked so peaceful. I grabbed my top and ran in to check she was ok and It was just a nightmare,' he said softly, looking down at Jess as she lay in his arms.

'Thank you, Jay,' Jess reached up and tip-toed her fingers along the stubble of his chin and kissed him again. 'Did it take long to calm her down? It sometimes takes me ages.'

'About ten minutes I guess. She was convinced there was a monster coming to get her. I told her it would have to get past me and she seemed to believe me. I read her a story once she'd calmed down and I guess I must have fell asleep,' he shrugged as if to say he was fine with getting up to her.

'You'll be regretting asking me to move in. That's the second nightmare she's had recently.' Jess remarked, thinking he surely must have been pissed off at being woken up unexpectedly.'

'Jess, not for a minute. I've already told you how I feel about you and Ruby. If you decide to move in with me then I'm there for both of you.'

'And how do you feel Jay?' Jess asked playfully. Now that at long last he'd voiced his feelings for her earlier that day, she loved hearing them tumble from his lips.

'Jess, you know how I feel. I love you. I'm mesmerised by you and when we're not together I can't think of anything else but you,' he swept her hair away from her forehead and kissed her there.

'Jay, I feel the same way as you.' Jess smiled up at him and yawned discreetly, 'we ought to try and get back to sleep or we'll be too knackered to do anything over the weekend. She leant over and clicked the bedside light off.

'That'll be your fault, Jess.' Jason laughed softly and kissed her neck in the darkness, grinning to himself as he felt goosebumps appear on her neck. 'You were the one who said I could fuck you all night if I wanted to. You can't get enough of me.'

'Smart arse.' Jess remarked under her breath, knowing it would wind him up.

'But I'm right,' he stated, dropping a final kiss on her shoulder as he turned over and within minutes was asleep as Jess lay awake in the darkness, the thoughts turning over in head as she tried to work out whether she was mad to be feeling a sliver of trepidation about moving in with him so soon.


	47. Chapter 47

They set off for London after breakfast the following day. Ruby was extremely excited about going as she had never visited London before and even though Jess and Steve had lived just outside London before they split up, but she didn't remember that far back.

As they drew up outside Howard's red brick townhouse set in Kensington, Jess smiled across at Jason. 'Is this like the place you used to have here?'

'Yeah, fairly similar. I was around a ten minute walk from here, Jess. I often used to come over for a drink here if I was at a loose end.' Jason remarked, getting out the car to fetch their luggage from the boot.

Once they were inside the house Jess went from room to room, imagining what Jason's house must have looked like in comparison. The house was light and airy with wooden floors throughout. They found Eloise's bedroom on the second floor and Ruby immediately went in to have a look at all her toys and books, while Jason led Jess upstairs to the floor above where they would be sleeping in the guest bedroom. 'Is this ok?' Jason asked, putting their bags on the floor by the bed.

Jess nodded and looked around the room. It was tastefully decorated and had a generously sized en-suite bathroom leading off it. 

'Are you ok with Ruby sleeping on the floor below?'

'Yes, we should still be able to hear if she needs us,' Jess remarked, as she opened the wardrobe door so she could put her clothes away.

'And you don't have to worry so much about keeping quiet when we're in bed together if she's on the floor below.' Jason teased her, laughing as she turned beetroot red with embarrassment.

'Shut up! I'm in no fit state after last night!' Jess laughed, chucking one of the ornamental cushions on the bed at him. 'So, what's the plan for this afternoon?' she asked, swiftly changing the subject as she rifled in her case to find her underwear. Just the thought of the night before sent shivers down her spine.

'Well Ruby mentioned about the London Eye, so I've booked on a river cruise and then we have a slot booked on the Eye at 3pm.' Jason wandered over and put his arms around Jess as she put her underwear in the drawer. 

'And are we having dinner here tonight or are we going out?' Jess asked, turning around and winding her arms around his neck and kissing him.

'We could go out for dinner or there's a really good Indian nearby and we could get a takeaway?' Jason referred to the Indian restaurant which he used to get a takeaway from now and then when he'd lived nearby. 'Does Ruby like Indian?' he asked, realising he knew her well when it came to certain things, but when it came down to other things such as what she liked to eat, he still had no clue.

'She'll eat pretty much anything to be honest. As long as it's not too spicy, but she's never tried Indian food.' Jess remarked, closing the drawer and fixing him with a grin. 'She'll be happy with whatever we decide to do, Jay. She's just so excited to be here. I'll just unpack her clothes and then we'll be ready.'

'She's done it herself. I popped my head around the door and said we'd be going soon and she was already putting her clothes away. Jess, you have an amazing daughter and you should be so proud of her,' he said, knowing Jess would be touched that he thought that.

Jess blushed prettily, thinking at times it had been difficult - especially at first after her and Steve had split up, but it had all been worth it. 'Thank you,' she whispered, her hand cradling his cheek as she stood on tip-toes and kissed him. 'Shall we get a move on to catch the boat?' she asked, checking the time on her watch and noticing it was nearly midday.

Once onboard the boat, Ruby had been fascinated by the London skyline, her eyes round as saucers as they went up on the top deck of the boat after eating lunch. The day had been unseasonably cold, so they'd wrapped up warmly and Jason sat on the wooden seats with Ruby standing in the gap between his legs, as she faced outwards towards the shoreline. He rested his chin on her shoulder and pointed out with his fore-finger all of the sights such as The Shard, The Gherkin, Tower Bridge and London Bridge. There was a commentator onboard, but Ruby only wanted to hear it all from Jason, such was her hero worship. Jess simply sat back and watched the two of them together, thinking why the hell Steve had turned out to be a father who didn't give a shit about his daughter? Times like this were bonding experiences that he was missing out on.

As they reached the point where the boat was due to turn around and make it's way back the O2 indoor arena appeared in the distance, dwarfing the other buildings surrounding it. It's dome shaped canopy supported by twelve yellow steel masts with twinkling lights at the end of each one. 'What's that, Jason?' Ruby asked, her fingers pointing towards the impressive structure.

'That's the O2 arena, Ruby. It has a concert venue which seats around twenty thousand people and a cinema. There are also restaurants and a shopping mall in there too. It's really impressive inside.' He pointed with his finger to the side of the building towards a cable car which cris-crossed the water like tiny bees in the air. 'That cable car comes across from the other side of the river. Do you see it?'

Ruby nodded and turned to look at Jason. 'Have you been to a concert or the cinema there?' she asked innocently. She had no inkling that Jason had performed there.

Jess snorted as she tried to stifle a laugh at Ruby's question. Even now Ruby knew snippets of Jason's past from the odd conversation, she realised that she had absolutely no idea just how famous Jason had been.

Jason raised his eyebrow at Jess as they exchanged a knowing glance. 'Should I tell her?' Jason whispered as he angled his head towards Jess to check if she was ok with him talking about his life before teaching. Jess nodded, thinking even she struggled to imagine him at the O2 performing in front of such a big audience. Jason took a breath and turned Ruby around so he could look at her. 'Ruby, remember when I said I was in a band? Well we played lots of dates there a few years ago.'

Ruby looked at him, feeling slightly confused. 'You played your guitar there?' she asked, her voice raising an octave in surprise. 'But weren't you frightened?'

'I did play my guitar there. And I danced and sang with my friends in the band. You remember Gary? Well I was in the band with him before I decided to leave. And yes, sometimes I was very, very frightened. But it was my job and it was also fun most of the time.'

'Twenty thousand people is a big number. I don't think I could count to that number. What does twenty thousand people look like?' Ruby swivelled her head around to look at the O2 and then back at Jason as she tried to comprehend what he was saying.

'Well, imagine as far up as you can see? It's very, very steep at the O2 and people look like ants in the highest seats. And when the lights go down at the beginning it's completely black and you can only see the people right in front of you, so it seems less scary.'

'Is that the most people you played guitar to, Jason?' Ruby asked, her interest piqued about his previous life. To her he'd always been a teacher and apart from the odd person nudging the person next to them if they recognised him, she'd seen nor heard nothing much about his previous life.

'No, I played to around ninety thousand at a stadium in London quite a lot of times. That was on two different tours. When our band mate Robbie joined us we played eight dates there. That's over 600,000 people, Ruby.'

Ruby's brow knitted together in silent astonishment as she tried to compute such a vast number. 'That is a lot...' she murmered, slinging her arm around his neck and resting her head in the hollow of his shoulder. 'Can I see one of your concerts online, Jay?'

'Of course. If your mum says you can - though we may have to only let you watch certain bits of it.' Jason's thoughts turned to some of the songs where either the dancers had virtually no clothes on such as during Relight my fire on The Circus tour or where he'd learnt to pole dance like he had on the Beautiful World tour. He had a feeling Jess wouldn't want Ruby seeing him do things like that at her age.

Ruby nodded and smiled. 'Will you take me one day to see a concert there?' She gestured her head backwards to where the O2 was now rapidly disappearing on the dwindling skyline.

'Of course. I'd like nothing more than that.' Jason replied, thinking he would love to take Ruby to her first concert - even if it meant sitting through a boy band like The Vamps just to make her happy. 

Jess watched their interchange, a small smile playing on her lips at their closeness. She sincerely hoped Jason meant what he said about not letting them down as Ruby would be utterly devastated if he did. In the five months since they'd been seeing each other it was obvious that Ruby loved Jason almost like a father and in turn he thought a lot of her - the fact that he'd fucked up so spectacularly when Annie had complained about him by trying not to let her daughter down again like her father had, made tears prickle at her eyelids. Even if she'd been so furious at the time.

Half an hour later they arrived back at the landing stage and walked to the London Eye. 'Stay here and I'll go get the tickets.' Jason suggested, leaving them standing by the priority entrance as he made his way over to the ticket office, pulling a beany hat on his head and sliding his sunglasses over his eyes as he did so. A few minutes later he was back with the tickets clutched in his hands and ushered them up the ramp to the front.

'Do we have a private pod?' Jess asked, as they entered the pod and the door closed immediately behind them.

'We do.' Jason admitted, hoping that she wouldn't think he was being showy. 'I thought seeing as it's your first trip on here it would be nice to see it without other people getting in front of Ruby. It honestly didn't cost that much.'

Jess looked up at Jason gratefully, thinking once again how thoughtful he was. 'Thank you, Jay.' She reached around and pulled Ruby into the circle of her arms so she could stand directly in front of the glass as the pod left the stage and began to inch upwards.

Jason squatted next to Ruby and began to point out all the famous landmarks that were amongst the vista spread out ahead of them. 'See, there's Buckingham Palace where the Queen lives,' he pointed. 'And that's the Houses of Parliament where the Prime minister works, as well as Big Ben.'

'Did you ever go to Buckingham Palace for tea with the Queen?' Ruby asked playfully.

'No, but Gary has.'

'Why not you? You were in the band with him, weren't you?' Ruby asked, looking at him quizzically, almost looking angry on his behalf that he hadn't been to tea with the Queen.

'Yes, but I wasn't as famous as him and I didn't arrange the Queens Jubilee concert either.' Jason bit his lip as he tried not to laugh at the way a child's mind worked.

'Oh. That's a shame. I think it would be fun to have tea with the Queen' Ruby stated, feeling slightly disappointed that Jason didn't have any insider knowledge of Buckingham Palace and all things pertaining to the Queen of England.

As the pod climbed higher into the sky, Jason took hold of Jess's hand in his and intertwined his fingers gently with hers as Ruby stared out across London, completely oblivious to what was going on behind her. 'Jess, I love you,' he whispered as he stood up and kissed her on the temple. 'You don't know how happy you make me,' he murmered, under his breath as his lips left her head and he squeezed her fingers in his.

'I love you too,' Jess whispered back to him, a soft smile crossing her face as they looked at each other.

As the pod slowly moved back around to the exit Jason looked at the pair of them. 'Shall we go for a walk along the river and would you like to try some Indian food, Ruby? I was thinking we could get a takeaway back at the house. What do you think?'

Ruby nodded vigorously and grinned up at the two of them. 'Yes please. Can we plan what we're doing tomorrow too?'

'Yes of course.' Jason ruffled her hair affectionately and looked down at her. 'This weekend is about you and mummy having the best weekend in London ever!'


	48. Chapter 48

The following day Jason booked tickets for them to see Madame Tussaud's waxworks and had promised Ruby a trip to the M&M's store. Jess had agreed that she could have a small bag of them as a treat, so Ruby was extremely excited.

'You liked your Indian meal Ruby?' Jason asked, as he put their breakfast dishes into the dishwasher and flicked the switch to put it on while they were out.

Ruby put her pencil down on top of her colouring book and looked at Jason. 'Yes I did.'

'Which did you like best?' he asked, standing and leaning against the worktop with his arms folded as he waited for her answer.

Ruby sucked in her bottom lip as she thought about his question. 'Um, Nan bread and the Vegetable Samosas.' 

'Nan bread was always my favourite,' Jason replied, grinning at her. 'My nickname used to be King Nan as I liked it so much!'

Ruby giggled as she tried to imagine Jason in his younger days. 'Did you have lots of girlfriends?' she asked, feeling curious now that he'd told her a bit about when he was younger.

Jason thought about how to answer her question truthfully. 'I guess, but none as special as your mum, Ruby.'

A huge smile swept across her face at his words. 'Mummy said she thinks you're special too.'

'Did your mum say you needed to keep that a secret?' Jason's mouth twitched, as he tried to suppress a smile at Ruby's little statement.

Ruby shrugged innocently as if to say she had no idea whether she should be saying anything or not, as she deliberately ignored his question. 'Shall I go and get my shoes?' she asked, getting off the stool at the breakfast bar.

'Yes, we'll leave in a few minutes.' Jason replied, giving her a small smile as he pondered on Ruby's words that Jess thought he was special.

As they ate lunch later at the The Rainforest cafe, Jason looked at Ruby. 'Did you like Madame Tussaud's?'

Ruby finished her mouthful of Alfredo pasta and nodded. 'Yes, I loved it. Thank you for taking me.'

Jason leant forward and wiped a smudge of the creamy sauce off Ruby's face where the tagliatelle had slapped, as she'd sucked it loudly through her pursed lips as she ate. 'You are very welcome, young lady.'

Ruby tore a strip off her garlic bread and gave him a cheeky grin. 'Did you ever have a wax work there?'

Jason burst out laughing. 'God no. I'd hate to think of a wax version of me in there at some point in my career. It's freaky! Imagine if it looked nothing like me!'

'Were you not famous enough?' Ruby asked, giggling at Jason's look of pretend hurt as she said the words.

'I'll have you know we were very famous.' Jason retorted, taking a drink of his water and keeping up the pretence that he was still hurt as he picked up his fork and made a start on his Honey Sriracha Salmon and rice. 'The issue was that they couldn't get us to sit still long enough to do the sketches and the work needed. We didn't really get at that age what a big deal it was to have a Madame Tussaud's waxwork. That said, knowing what a bunch of kleptomaniacs our fans were they'd have been nicking bits and pieces off us to take home with them, so it would have been a waste of time,' he gave her a lop-sided grin, as he rolled his eyes at her.

Ruby grinned back at him. 'Is a kleptomaniac another name for a thief?' she asked, thinking that was a cool word to file away for future use.

'Yeah it is,' he leant forward and ruffled her hair with his hands. 'You might have to slip that word into your homework for your new teacher. She'll be dead impressed with that one.' He then pointed at the ceiling of the restaurant and looked at her. 'What do you think of it here? Cool isn't it? This is Eloise's favourite place, according to Howard.'

Ruby looked around taking in the room again. 'It is cool! I love all the animals and the noises. It's like eating in a real rainforest.'

After lunch they headed off to the M&M's store where Ruby bought herself a small bag of the peanut flavoured multi-coloured sweets and Jason bought a box of the normal chocolate ones for the children in his class to try. He made a mental note to strictly ration the more boisterous members of the class so they didn't go completely out of control after eating them.

By the time they'd been to the M&M store Jess could see that Ruby was starting to flag with all the walking. They reached the top of Regent street and Jess nodded her head in the direction towards Oxford Street. 'Shall we walk down here and then get the underground back to the house?'

Jason nodded, his glance casting in Ruby's direction as he realised she was beginning to look tired. 'Good idea.' As they reached the jewellers Mappin and Webb he looked over at Ruby in mischief. 'So I hear it's someone's birthday next month?'

Ruby nodded back at him. 'It's mummy's.'

Jason stopped in the middle of the pavement, ignoring the tuts of the pedestrians who had been walking behind him and who nearly crashed into them. He cocked his head to one side as he looked at Ruby. 'I think your mum should go and get a coffee, don't you? And we can go on a shopping spree.'

'I am here, you two!' Jess replied, in mock annoyance. She held her hands up in front of her and smiled at the two of them. 'I know when I'm not wanted! I'll bugger off.' 

'There's a cafe over there. Wait for us in there and we'll meet you when we're done.' Jason said, giving her a quick perfunctory kiss on the forehead as she turned away and left them to get a drink.

'So, does she like jewellery?' Jason asked, realising he had no clue what exactly she did like. He knew she liked pretty underwear, but he wasn't about to be buying anything like that with Ruby in tow. He also knew from the comments that she'd made in the M&M's store that she wasn't bothered about expensive chocolates. She said she'd rather have a tub of Celebrations than posh Belgian chocolates. He realised there was still a lot he didn't know about Jess and he was finding it fascinating getting to know her likes and dislikes.

Ruby nodded. 'Yes. But she buys her jewellery from Next or Fat Face because we don't have much money since I stopped going to stay at dad's.'

Jason's lips set in a thin line of distaste as he thought what a waste of space Steve was. It made him angry that Jess had to work an extra day because he didn't want anything to do with Ruby anymore. 'Well how about we spoil her?' he pushed the door open to the jewellers and ushered Ruby in ahead of him.

As they wandered around the shop, the assistant hurried over and grinned broadly at them. 'Can I help you?'

Jason nodded and looked down at Ruby. 'What do you think mummy would like? Shall we get something from me and from you?'

'But I don't have any pocket money with me.' Ruby's bottom lip quivered slightly as she realised her ten pound note was back at Howard's house.

'It's fine. This will cost a little bit more than ten pounds. I'll buy it, but you can wrap one of the presents and write the label from you. What do you think she'd like?' he turned to look at the assistant who was hovering nearby. 'We'll have a wander and then ask you for help if that's ok?' he said politely, as he ushered Ruby towards one of the glass cases.

The assistant smiled back at him as she tried to place where she knew him from. 'Of course,' she said quietly, retreating into the background to let them look.

'Do you think she'd like this set of earrings and necklace? he pointed to a beautiful, sparkling set of earrings and necklace. The diamonds were designed to look like tiny snowflakes and were extremely tasteful.

Ruby let out a little squeak as Jason pointed them out. She'll love them. Can we see them?'

Jason called the assistant over and she swiftly opened the cabinet, drawing them out so the two of them could look at them. She took the earrings out of the display and lay them on the glass counter so they could examine them closer.

'What do you think? Too ostentatious?' Jason rubbed his chin as he looked at the earrings and necklace.

'What does that word mean?' Ruby looked at Jason in confusion. She loved being with him, but every now and then he used words which she didn't understand and most certainly couldn't spell.

'Too posh, Ruby.' Jason chuckled lightly, as he realised for not the first time that he sometimes forgot how young she was.

'I think they're very pretty. Mum will love them I think.' Ruby stepped forward closer, her fingertips brushing over the necklace as she looked closer at it. 'But I don't think she'll believe I bought either of them with my pocket money,' she turned to look at him, her face showing how worried she was about pretending she'd bought one of them.

Jason looked at her intently, knowing instantly what was worrying her. 'Would you rather I buy these both from me and you could maybe use your money to get her something personal?' he raised his eyes questioningly at her, as he waited for her to answer.

The assistant stood watching the verbal interplay between them, thinking how cute the pair of them were together. If her father was anything to go by looks-wise she was going to be a stunner when she was older, she thought to herself as she studied the two of them and assumed they were father and daughter. 'Would you like me to gift wrap them for you?' she asked politely, still trying to place where she knew him from.

'Um no, I think me and Ruby would like to wrap them ourselves wouldn't we?' 

Ruby nodded and smiled, thinking Jess would love the presents. 'Can we make her a present from me?' she asked, an idea beginning to form in her mind. 'I think I know what I'd like to make her. I've just never had anyone to help me before.'

'Ok.' Jason agreed and smiled down at her as he paid for the necklace and earrings. As they left the shop they stood to one side so they didn't get knocked over by passers-by. 'So what were you thinking? You'd better tell me so we can get our thinking caps on.'

'I can never find anything with her name on it in the shops. Mummy always jokes it's because she has such a weird name that nobody buys her presents with her name on them. It's the same for Aunty Danni too, because she's really called Daniella.' 

Jason's nose wrinkled in confusion. 'But surely there's lots of things with Jessica on them? It's a popular name here.' 

'But her name isn't Jessica. It's Jessamine.' Ruby then repeated her mum's name again as if he was a complete idiot. 'Jess...uh...min..., that's how you say it. Did you not know that?' she shook her head at him, as if to say he couldn't possibly love her mum if he thought she was called Jessica the whole time. 'It comes from the name Jasmine.' 

'Well it's not exactly something we've ever felt the need to discuss, Ruby.' Jason replied tersely, feeling a bit stupid that he'd never noticed it on Ruby's records when she was in his class. 'She's Jess to me,' he shrugged and held his hands out in a gesture of apology, so she could see he was embarrassed at his faux pas.

'Well I won't tell her that you thought she was called Jessica if you'll help me make her present?' Ruby giggled, her eyebrow arching cheekily at him.

'What were you thinking?'

'I've always wanted to make her a mug. Can I put some photos on it and her name.'

'Will she be ok with her whole name being on it?' Jason asked, wondering if she really would be happy with her full name on it, given that it wasn't common knowledge.

'Yes, because it will be made by me and you.' Ruby replied simply, knowing that Jess would be over the moon when she received a present made by the two of them.


	49. Chapter 49

By the time the train pulled into Kensington High Street underground station Ruby was fast asleep, her head lolling against Jason's arm. 'Ruby, it's time to get off,' Jason shook her gently, knowing by her flushed face that she was exhausted from all the walking they'd done over the last couple of days. 

After fixing sandwiches for them all, Jess took Ruby up for a bath while Jason tidied up the kitchen. As he wiped the worktop down so there were no crumbs, his mind wandered to the weekend they'd spent together and how much he'd enjoyed it. He loved spending time with both Ruby and Jess and it made him realise how much he would have loved to have a relationship like this when he was in the band - the type of relationship Howard and Jo had. He sort of felt sad that he hadn't met Jess earlier, but at the same time he knew he'd needed to leave the band for his own sanity because of the goldfish bowl type existence and that he would never have met her if he'd stayed with the band.

Jess heard his footsteps on the stairs while Ruby was getting dressed into her pyjamas and poked her head around the door. 'Ruby was asking if you'd read with her tonight, Jay?' she asked softly, noticing he looked tired.

'Yes of course,' Jason immediately came into the room and smiled at Ruby who was just about to get in bed. 'Do you want to choose a book and then we can read a page each?'

'As long as you make the silly noises if there are any animals in the book. You're better than me.' Ruby remarked, turning to Eloise's mammoth sized book shelf, her fingertips trailing along the edge of the shelf as she looked at each book title one by one as she tried to decide.

'I'll go for a shower then?' Jess suggested, feeling surplus to requirements as Jason was so obviously in demand. She put her arms around Ruby and gave her a kiss. 'Love you, Rubes. See you in the morning. Sleep tight.'

'I won't be long, Jess.' Jason remarked, his gaze following Jess as she began to back out of the room. 'Don't be poking about in any of the bags from today,' he called out as an afterthought. 'I don't want you ruining your birthday surprise.'

'Jay, I'm 32 years old. I think I'm grown up enough to resist the temptation,' she laughed, her lips curving up into a smile as she replied to him. She had to admit she was curious as to what he'd bought her in Mappin and Webb as it was a pretty exclusive jewellers, but it didn't mean she'd actually go poking through the bags.

Ruby waited until Jess left the room and looked at Jason mischievously as she got into bed. 'Will you help me design her present either tomorrow before we leave or sometime next week?'

'Of course. You'll be coming over to stay at my flat next weekend too. Me and your mum already arranged it. You're going to be coming over the next three weekends to stay.' He omitted to tell her that the reason was for a small trial run so Jess could be sure about living together.'

'Oh, that's good,' she opened the book to the first page of writing and then closed it again,' 'it was fun choosing mummy's jewellery, wasn't it?'

'It was. It's a very long time since I had a girlfriend to buy jewellery for, so you were excellent help.'

'Do you think if you ever want to buy her any more I could help?' she asked, chewing on her bottom lip as she tried to keep a straight face. 'You know.... like a ring?'

'Ruby Shaw! What are you up to?' Jason asked with a small laugh, half an inkling running through him as he caught on to what she was on about. 

'Nothing!' Ruby replied, her face a picture of total innocence. 'It's just if you love someone enough don't you marry them?'

Jason muttered the word fuck under his breath as he picked up her book and busied himself finding the first page. 'You first...' he said, pointing to the first page and deliberately ignoring her question.

'It's rude to swear. I heard you swear under your breath. And it's rude to ignore people's questions,' Ruby muttered, closing the book again firmly so he had to look at her. 

Jason looked at her from under his lashes and bit his lip to stop himself laughing as he glimpsed her indignant expression as she crossed her arms in front of her like someone a lot older than she was. 'Yes, I guess you're right. You do marry someone if you love them enough, but not everyone gets married and these days it doesn't matter. You can still love someone just as much and not marry them. But I promise if I ever decide that I want to ask your mum you will be my chief ring-picker. Ok?' he ran his hand over the back of her head affectionately, thinking she was far too clever sometimes for her own good. 

Ruby opened the book again to start reading and then paused, opening her mouth again to speak as a thought came to her mind.

Jason saw her mouth open and guessed she still wasn't finished on the subject of love and marriage. Looking into her eyes with a small smile, his fingertips still touched the back of her head. 'Ruby, I'm going to be honest with you here, Ok?' he waited until she nodded and then continued; 'Me and your mum haven't been together long and even if I was ready I don't think she'd ever want to. You know, because of how things are with your dad?'

Ruby chewed on her lip thoughtfully. 'Because he left us?'

'Yes. And that wasn't your fault, Ruby,' he instantly wanted to assure her that Steve's dismal behaviour was nothing to do with her. 'Getting married is something that neither of us really want, Ruby. Certainly not at the moment. Ok?' he waited a beat until he saw her nod before continuing, 'but I do love your mum and you.'

A big smile exploded across Ruby's face at his words. She put her arms around his waist and cuddled into the crook of his arm. 'I love you too. I wish you were my dad.'

Jason felt a lump come to his throat at her words. 'I'm sorry I'm not your dad Ruby. I would be so proud of you if I was. But I'm always here if you want someone to talk to.' He cleared his throat in an attempt to get rid of the lump in it and looked down at her. 'Are we going to get this book read? If not your mum will think I've been kidnapped.'

Twenty minutes later he walked up to the bedroom he was sharing with Jess and grinned as he found her watching TV as she lay on her stomach on the bed, her head propped up on her upturned hand. 'I thought you were having a shower?' he said softly, dropping his head down towards her and kissing her on the lips.

'I thought we could have one together?' she raised her eyebrow naughtily at him, and slid off the bed so she was standing in front of him in just her midnight blue satin slip - the same one he recalled her wearing the night they first slept together. 

Jason wound an arm around her waist and pulled her closer to him as his other hand swept up her thigh. 'You are a bad girl Jessamine Shaw!' he muttered under his breath, as he realised she had no knickers on underneath the thigh skimming outfit and began to kiss her neck, his mouth curving up into a smile as he felt her shiver as he kissed her behind her ear where he knew she was most sensitive.

Jess plucked at the hem of his t-shirt as he continued kissing her. 'I never thought I'd like anyone using my god awful proper name, but you make it sound kind of hot,' she laughed, as he carried on kissing her neck as she pulled the t-shirt over his head, causing his hair to stand up and crackle with electricity. Her fingers trailed down over his chest and she tip-toed her fingertips downwards until she reached the waistband of his jeans and began to undo them. Pushing his jeans down his legs, swiftly followed by his underwear she then took hold of his hand and pulled him towards the bathroom. 

Later on as they lay in bed together, Jason looked down at Jess as she lay against his shoulder, her fingertips tracing small patterns on his smooth chest. 'Do you think Ruby enjoyed herself this weekend?' he asked her, his hand stroking the red waves of hair which he loved so much away from her face.

'Yes I do. And she adores you, Jay. Thank you for being so good to her,' she kissed him softly on the lips, her fingers continuing to trace patterns downwards.

'She's a good kid.' Jason replied, trying to ignore the way her fingertips felt on his bare skin. He grabbed hold of her hand and encircled her wrist tightly. 'What do you think you're doing?' he said under his breath as he pushed her onto her back, his other hand grabbing on to the other wrist and holding them both above her head so she couldn't move them.

Jess arched her back, so her chest brushed against his. 'Can you manage round two?' she stated, her tone challenging him as his mouth found hers and brushed against it before he began to kiss and nip at her neck, still holding her wrists tightly.

'I quite liked round one,' Jason joked, referring to her surprising him in the shower. The minute they were in there she'd dropped to her knees and given him the one of the most mind-blowing blow jobs he'd ever had in his life, putting any ideas of making love to her out of his mind at that moment in time. 'But I'm more than happy to go for round two now I've had chance to recover,' he said jokingly.

Jess wriggled in anticipation as he began to kiss her breasts, still holding her wrists so she couldn't touch him, before taking a nipple in his mouth and grazing them with his teeth and grinning as she groaned loudly and lifted her pelvis towards his, so he was in no doubt that she wanted him. 'You want me, Jess?' he asked, his head on one side as he waited for her answer.

Jess nodded. 'Yes, I want you.'

'Good,' he replied, as he heard a sharp intake of breath tumble from between her lips as he began to stroke between her legs.

Drawing up outside Jess's house the following day, Jason looked across at her. 'Are you sure you won't stay tonight?' he asked, giving her a look like a lost little boy. 

'Jay, I need to get Ruby's things ready for school tomorrow morning. I'm sorry.' she looked at him apologetically. Why don't you come over for dinner maybe Wednesday or Thursday and we can decide what we fancy doing together at the weekend. I'll invite Peter over too if that's ok?' she suggested, sliding out of the passenger seat and unlocking the front door.

'Ok. Thursday? I'll walk back with Ruby and then you don't have to rush back to collect her.'

Jess nodded. 'I'll check if Peter is free and pick him up en-route and then the two of you can get to know each other better. I'll also get you a front door key cut this week,' she remarked, taking Ruby's rucksack from him and walking into the house. Ruby followed the pair of them into the house and took her rucksack upstairs while Jason and Jess went into the kitchen.

'I had a lovely weekend, Jess. Thank you.' he looped his arms around her waist and pulled her towards him to kiss her.

Jess touched the planes of his cheek with her fingertips. 'I had a lovely weekend too, Jay.' she replied as their lips met in a bittersweet kiss. 

Jason sighed a heavy sigh, thinking he really didn't want to leave her and gave her one last kiss. 'See you Thursday. I love you.' 

'I love you too, Jay.' Jess replied, her fingers glancing off his as she tried to keep a connection to him as long as possible as he walked away and she tried to squash down the feeling that she wanted to just go back to his flat as he suggested.


	50. Chapter 50

The rest of the month passed quickly as Jason threw himself into work to try to forget how much he missed Jess and Ruby whenever they left each Sunday night. Jess was also working hard now that she was working an extra shift to make up for Steve no longer paying for Ruby's maintenance. Jason went over for dinner at Jess's house once a week and their relationship continued to blossom as Jason found himself falling deeper and deeper in love with Jess. Every Sunday evening when the two of them left him to go home he found it harder than the previous one and he found he couldn't stop thinking about her when he was alone.

Jess was feeling the exact same way every Sunday evening and had at times been seriously tempted to just agree to move in with him, because every week she was missing him more and more too. It was only the thought that things had only been serious for a couple of months now which made her stick to her guns about being sure before she moved in. She loved spending time with him and he was fantastic with Ruby, which was an added bonus and considering things had been a bit rocky not so long ago. She knew that the realisation that he had strong feelings for her had scared him at first, but now he had acknowledged how he felt, he was affectionate towards her and she felt secure - more secure than she ever had with Steve.

It was on the third Friday evening after their weekend away in London that Jason mentioned to Jess that his parents had invited the three of them over for Sunday lunch. She had often secretly wondered whether the reason she'd never met them before was because she had Ruby and that he wasn't sure what their reaction would be to him bringing home a single mum. Nice as his sister Jackie had been when they met at his flat, she'd made it pretty obvious that she didn't think much to him being with her because of Ruby. 

Jason waited until Ruby was in bed and they were sitting on the sofa listening to music to broach the subject as she settled into the crook of his arm to cuddle up to him with her glass of wine. 'Um, Jess mum asked us over for lunch on Sunday if you'd like to meet her and my step-dad Paul?'

Jess raised an eyebrow and took a sip of her wine. 'I was beginning to think you were trying to hide me and Ruby away from your family,' she remarked, instantly knowing from his guarded expression as she said the words that was exactly what he'd been doing. 'You're embarrassed, aren't you? That's why this invite has taken so long,' she sat up straighter, moving slightly further away from him on the sofa as she studied his expression of regret, as it flitted across his face.

Jason sighed deeply, knowing that Jess was sort of right. It wasn't that he was embarrassed about their relationship - he just knew his mum wouldn't hold back on what she thought. 'Jess, it's not that. Honestly. My mum is a typical, strong Northern woman and she has an opinion on everything. She only ever met Ruth once and to be honest with you she didn't like her and I wanted to be sure about us before you met. I wanted her to see how happy you and Ruby make me. If I'd have taken you not long after we'd met she'd have probably dismissed you as just a fling - because I've never dated a single mum before.'

'And what will she have to say about Ruby do you think?' Jess asked fearfully, thinking if Jason's mum was opinionated and had too much to say about things she wouldn't hold back if it meant protecting her daughter's feelings.

'I've already pre-warned her, Jess. She knows about Ruby and that I think a lot of you both,' he omitted to say that his mum had asked him if Jess was after his money, so they could "play happy families" as she'd said in her usual direct way.

'And will it be just your parents or your brother and sister too?' Jess asked, her stomach sinking at the thought that she was going to be judged like a dog at Crufts Dog Show and might be found lacking.

'Just my mum and step-father. We have next week off together for half term, so I thought it might be nice if we could go out for dinner with them during the week if we can get a sitter for Ruby? Mum thought it might be a bit much to meet Jackie and all her brood and Jacob and his lot too, as well as my younger brother Tom.'

Jess looked gratefully at him. 'That was very kind of her. Yes, it probably would be a bit overwhelming.'

Jason glanced across at her and gently moved her back into the crook of his arm. 'Don't worry. They will love you both and you have absolutely nothing to worry about,' he assured her as he dropped a kiss on her upturned lips, before swiftly changing the subject. 'Do you feel ready to move in with me yet? I've missed you both so much and it's getting harder to be separated from you. It seems silly for you to go home on Sunday evening when Ruby and I have the week off for half term. She can stay here with me when you have to work and I'll keep her busy.'

Jess gave him a small smile, thinking if only he knew how much she'd missed him too and nodded. 'Ok. We'll tell Ruby tomorrow.'

The following morning Jess waited until Jason had been for his usual Saturday morning run before preparing brunch for them all. It was a day when Jason tended to relax more about what he ate. Walking into the kitchen, he dropped a kiss on the top of her head as she busied herself making their scrambled eggs and smoked salmon to go on top of the crispy bagels, which she'd picked up in Waitrose the day before. 'Need a hand?' he asked her, as he poured water into a mug for his camomile tea. 

Jess shook her head and watched him as he dropped a kiss into Ruby's head and sat himself on the chair next to her at the kitchen table. It made her heart ache watching how at ease he was with Ruby compared to how Ruby's actual father behaved. 

'So am I telling her or are you?' Jason joked, winking at Jess over Ruby's head. 

'Tell me what?' Ruby asked, her eyes round with excitement when she realised they were hiding some kind of secret from her.

'I'll tell her.' Jess looked at Ruby across the table. 'How do you fancy the three of us living here together permanently?' she asked, hoping Ruby would be ok with it. She knew Ruby adored Jason, but it didn't necessarily mean she'd automatically be happy about moving in with him.

'Really?' Ruby squeaked, hardly believing her ears as a huge smile lit up her features. She'd often dreamed that they all lived together in domestic bliss, but it seemed her dream was about to become a reality. 

Jason grinned at her. He had been fairly sure that she'd be happy and judging by her expression she was over the moon. 'Are you happy having the bedroom you usually stay in? We can re-decorate it and you can choose everything you'd like in it, so that you have the best bedroom you could wish for.'

Ruby jumped off her chair and threw her arms around Jess first, before running around to hug Jason tightly. 'I'm so happy,' she shrieked at the top of her voice, before bursting into noisy tears. 

'Would you like to go and choose some paint today and then we can make a start on decorating your room?' Jason asked, a lump coming to his throat as he hugged her tightly to him, knowing she wouldn't want to wait to make a start now that she knew they were moving in. He looked at Jess, a thought suddenly crossing his mind. 'What will you do about your house?'

Jess shrugged, she hadn't put too much thought into what would happen to the house. 'I guess I'll rent it out for a few months and then maybe put it up for sale? Would it be ok to move some of our bits and pieces in next week? I'm not bothered really about my furniture as you have everything I need here, but I'd like to bring things such as my clothes and my photos here and no doubt Ruby will want to bring her toys and books, won't you Ruby?' she stroked Ruby's hair as she asked her the question. Ruby nodded in response and smiled up at her mum.

'Well if there's anything you want to do to make this place more comfortable for you two ladies, just let me know. I might draw the line at painting the lounge pink, but you know what I mean?' Jason suggested with a smile. He knew that his flat lacked any feminine touches whatsoever and wanted them to feel comfortable. 

The following day they set off for Jason's parents house late morning. Jason and Ruby had begun to clear the room beforehand which would be Ruby's while Jess used the gym on the first floor which belonged to the flats. Both of them had insisted that Jess go as she'd not had time to go earlier in the week due to the extra hours she was working.

As they drew up outside the house on the outskirts of Manchester, Jason's mum came out of the house to greet them. She was looking forward to meeting Jess and Ruby, knowing that for Jason to have asked them to move in must mean at long last he'd met someone who made him happy. She had misgivings of course that Jess had an ex husband lurking around in the background and had a child. She knew from the way he'd described Jess already that she was not his usual type and it did worry her a little, but it was his rose-tinted view that bringing up someone else's child would be easy that worried her the most. As Jess got out of the car she drew her into an awkward hug, before holding her at arms length so she could discreetly look her up and down. 'Hi, you must be Jess! I'm Sally,' she stated in her soft Mancunian accent, before turning to look at Ruby and smiling at her.

'I'm Ruby!' Ruby said politely, sticking her hand out in a slightly stiff manner as she held onto her colouring book and pencils in her other hand.

Sally looked down kindly at Ruby, thinking how pretty she was and certainly not lacking in confidence. 'It's really nice to meet you, Ruby. Jason didn't tell me how pretty you are,' she glanced at Jason and shook her head as if to say he was in trouble. Would you feel comfortable calling me Sally?' she asked, her head on one side as she waited for an answer.

Ruby nodded and took an instant liking to Jason's mum, thinking she wished she had more than one grandma like some of her friends had.

Once they were inside the house Jason introduced them both to his step-dad Paul and they rapidly disappeared off into the garden so Paul could show him his prized garden and the work he'd done on it over the weekend.

'Would you like to put the kettle on, Jess? I'll just pop the lunch in the oven and then we can sit down and chat properly,' Sally suggested, giving Jess a warm smile. 

A few minutes later Sally and Jess sat down in the lounge opposite each other. Sally had found some jigsaw puzzles and colouring books to keep Ruby amused so they could speak properly. 'So I understand you and Jason met when he was teaching Ruby?' she nodded her head in Ruby's direction, smiling as she saw she was already busy colouring in a picture of a dragon.

'Yes, I first met him at parents evening. We then saw each other properly when we bumped into each other again at Heaton Park and we got snowed in.'

Sally nodded as she recalled Jackie ringing her the morning she'd been to Jason's flat and Jess had been there. 'Yes, I remember Jackie telling me.' She took a sip of her tea. 'I assume you knew who Jason was the first time you met him?' She knew Jason would be angry if he knew she was asking Jess questions like this, but wanted to know for her own peace of mind.

'You're asking if I'm a gold-digger aren't you?' Jess sat back in her chair and eyed Sally coolly as she tried to work out exactly what to say. From what Jason had said about his mum she had been expecting the question, but she hadn't expected it to be literally the first question she asked. 

'I guess I am.' Sally replied, having the good grace to look slightly embarrassed as she studied Jess.

'You're not like Jay, are you? He takes forever sometimes to talk about his feelings about things,' Jess laughed softly and shook her head. 'No, I'm not. I honestly had no clue who he was until I saw the gold discs in his flat. You can ask Gary if you don't believe me. He thought it was hilarious. I'm still going to work and I've just upped my hours as I need to earn more money because of issues with Ruby's dad - there's no way I want Jay helping me. Does that answer your question?'

Sally looked at Jess with renewed respect that she obviously wasn't fazed by her direct questioning. 'And Ruby's dad. Does he know who Jason is?'

Jess licked her lips nervously, realising there was a good chance that Ruby was half listening to their conversation. 'Ruby, why don't you go outside to see what Jason is doing?' she suggested, so she could answer Sally. She waited until Ruby had put down her pencils and disappeared outside. 'Sorry, I don't want Ruby hearing bad stuff about her dad - no matter how rubbish he is as a father,' she replied, her mouth twisting up in distaste as she thought about him. 'I haven't actually told him. Ruby doesn't really go and see her dad as he doesn't want to really be part of her upbringing. He no longer pays maintenance which is why I've increased my hours - I don't want Jay to feel like he has to support us.'

'Her dad has nothing to do with her at all?' Sally asked, her heart aching for Ruby.

Jess shook her head sadly. 'No. He left a few years ago and immediately moved in with his secretary Cheryl. They're married now and he lives near London, but he's made it pretty obvious he wants no part in her upbringing. Ruby hates going to stay there and now that he pays no maintenance I see no reason to make her go.'

Sally sat back in her chair and looked at Jess sadly. 'That's so sad. Now I understand why Jason is so protective of her. When he rang me to say he'd asked you to move in with him I knew he must think a lot of you both and I insisted on meeting you. He desperately wanted kids and he was never lucky enough to meet the right person and now he's met you he's been given a second chance - even if Ruby is someone else's daughter. You don't know how happy that's made me.'

Jess looked up in complete surprise as Sally walked over to her and pulled her into a tight hug before she could react. She stood up, hardly believing what was going on as she stood encircled in Sally's arms in a cloud of soft perfume.

'Look after my boy, won't you?' Sally whispered, sniffing away a tear.

Jess moved her arms up and returned the tight hug, a lump coming to her throat at the thought that this was Sally's way of telling her she approved of not only her, but also Ruby too. 'I will. I promise.'


	51. Chapter 51

As Jason drove home later that afternoon, he slid a glance across at Jess as she sat staring out of the window. He noticed she'd gone awfully quiet just before they left his parents house. 'Jess, is everything ok?' he asked gently, turning the volume down on the radio as it blared out the latest number one single.

Jess swivelled her head to look at him. 'Yes, I'm just tired and my head aches - like I said at your parents house,' she replied, before looking back out of the window and staring away into the distance.

'My mum has that affect on people. She can't half talk. I'm sorry,' Jason laughed softly, not realising that she wasn't happy as he reached across to hold Jess's hand in his as they drove along the M60 motorway.

'Yes, I noticed,' Jess replied, her tone short as she moved her hand away from his and rooted around in her bag in an attempt to hide the rush of tears which flooded her eyes.

'Jess...' Jason suddenly realised something had seriously upset her as he saw her bite her lip and key the code of her phone to unlock it. The fact that she'd moved her hand away from his indicated she was upset or pissed off about something and he had no idea why.

Jess looked up, her eyes bright with unshed tears as their eyes locked. 'Not now, Jay. I don't want to talk,' she scrolled through the text messages on her phone and swiftly replied to her mum and sister who had both texted her while they'd been out. Her thoughts drifted back to the afternoon spent at his parents house and how everything had seemed to be going so well. Even though Sally was outspoken, she had felt a connection with her and had thought that she seemed very similar to her own mother, who had toughened up considerably after her father John had died. Jason had gone into the kitchen to make cups of tea for them all while Paul went to water the garden as the weather that week had been dry.

Sally had offered to show her and Ruby some of the many photos that she had of Jason and the band, which were dotted around the house and in an album which she'd proudly bought and filed newspaper clippings from around the world in. 'I'll see you next week!' Jason had laughed and called after them, as the three of them went up the stairs. He had told her earlier that day that it amused him that even now after he'd left the band his mum was still so proud of his career. He'd also pre-warned her that the album may well make an appearance, because she showed the album to anyone who showed the slightest interest in his past.

'Shall I leave you to have a nosey?' Sally had asked, as Jess opened the album and Ruby began to giggle at a photo of Jason in an early photo wearing cycling shorts, a vest and the type of shoes a boxer wore in the boxing ring. Jess looked over her shoulder and smiled, nodding at Sally as she stood behind them. 'You can bring it downstairs if you want,' she'd offered, peering over and smiling as Jess turned the page to look at an early newspaper cutting about one of their first performances. 'He was very handsome, don't you think?' Sally asked, as she saw Jess's fingertips trace around Jason's jawline in one of the close ups from their earlier days.

'He still is. I don't think I've met many men who are more handsome than him,' Jess said softly, as she gazed down at Jason when he was young. 'I often feel like I'm punching way above my weight when I look at him.'

'Nonsense!' Sally said, putting her arm around Jess's shoulder and squeezing it supportively. 'You're beautiful. Just like Jason said you were. I'll go and give Jason a hand with the tea. Come down when you're both ready and if Ruby wants to take the album home afterwards to look at it again, you're more than welcome as long as you bring it back next time you come,' she smiled at them both kindly, before leaving them to look at her treasured album.

As Sally headed downstairs, Ruby looked up at Jess. 'Can we take this book downstairs and then maybe Jason can tell us more about some of the articles?'

'I think that's a very good idea, Rubes. You take the album downstairs and I'll just pop to the toilet and then I'll be down. Ok?' she ran her hand lovingly over Ruby's dark hair and smiled down at her as Ruby closed the album carefully and put it under her arm to take downstairs.

In the bathroom, Jess checked her hair in the bathroom mirror before heading downstairs. As she had neared the kitchen at the bottom of the stairs she could hear the low murmur of Jason and Sally's voices as they talked, whilst Jason poured the hot water into the pot. Her ears pricked up as she heard Sally mention her name and she stopped on the stairs near the kitchen door, wondering whether to make her presence known. She knew she shouldn't listen - after all, as everyone said you never overhear good being said if you eavesdrop, but she found herself rooted to the step as Sally continued talking.

In the kitchen, Sally stood with her back leaning against the worktop and her arms folded as she'd spoken. 'Jess seems lovely, Jason.'

'You like her?' Jason asked, a note of pride in his voice that Sally had said she seemed lovely. It was extremely important to him that she liked Jess.

'I do. But I can't help wondering whether you'd have preferred a younger woman without a child? Do you really think this will work when it's so different to the type of relationship you're used to?' Sally had put her hand on Jason's arm as she questioned him.

'You're right.' Jason had said, his voice trailing off as if he was deep in thought.

Jess's breath had caught in her throat as she realised that Jason was basically agreeing with his mum, judging by his reply. She'd quickly descended the last couple of stairs as quietly as she could, so they wouldn't realise she'd been standing there and went into the lounge. Ruby was sitting on the sofa with the album open on her lap as Jess sat next to her and tried to will away the tears that threatened.

As Jason and Sally had come back into the room a few minutes later she'd tried to act normally, but she felt sick at Jason's response. Did that mean he was having second thoughts, she'd wondered?

Two hours later Ruby yawned discreetly. They'd looked through the album and Jason had told them anecdotes about some of the newspaper articles and photos. Nobody had noticed that Jess had said very little the whole time as her mind kept replaying him saying he didn't know if he wanted someone with a child and someone her age. 'Jay, would you mind if we went home? I have a really bad headache,' she asked quietly, as his mum disappeared into the kitchen again. She had a funny feeling if they stayed any longer his mum would be bringing in sandwiches and she didn't want to sit there exchanging pleasantries any longer.

Opening the front door to his flat, Jason looked down at Ruby. 'Shall we watch a film?'

Ruby looked up at Jason and grinned. 'As long as I can choose the film! Shall we put pyjamas on and veg out on the sofa?'

Jason nodded in agreement. 'I'll put the TV on and you can choose,' he looked over at Jess and noticed she still didn't look herself. 'Are you watching with us or are you having a nap to try and get rid of your headache?'

'I'm going for a nap,' Jess replied flatly, kicking her trainers off untidily and stalking off in the direction of the bedroom. She knew Jason would be pissed off at her chucking them in a heap, which was all the more reason to do it, she thought to herself.

Jason followed her into the bedroom, wondering what the hell was going on. He softly closed the door and faced Jess as she totally ignored him as if he wasn't there. 'Want to tell me what's going on, Jess?' 

Jess pulled her t-shirt over her head to play for time while she tried to work out what to say. 'Not really. No.' She shook her head at him and pulled her nightdress over her head before removing her jeans and sliding under the covers.

Jason retrieved his pyjamas and changed into them, his mind in a whirl as he tried to work out what the hell was going on. 'Jess, did something happen at my parents house?' he looked down at her, his face confused as she lay in the bed with her eyes closed.

'Jay, I have a headache and I don't want to talk. Just leave me alone.' Jess snapped and turned over so that her back faced him.

'Is mummy ok?' Ruby asked, looking up at Jason worriedly as he entered the lounge. She picked up the TV controller and began to scroll through the listings to see if there were any films on TV for them both to watch as she waited for him to reply. 

'Yeah, she's just got a headache,' Jason replied as he worked out what to say exactly and fixed Ruby with a grin of reassurance. He hoped his mum hadn't said anything to upset Jess when they'd been upstairs looking at the album as it was after that when she'd started to act decidedly "off". 'Shall I'll go make some popcorn,' he suggested, raising his eyebrow at her questioningly.

Ruby nodded enthusiastically, her eyes following Jason as he disappeared off into the kitchen as she found one of the Mr Bean films and settled down to watch it.

Just over two hours later after Ruby had gone to bed, Jason went back into the bedroom hoping that Jess might be in a better frame of mind to speak to him. He hadn't really watched the film as he worried to himself about what had caused her to be so snappy with him.

Jess awoke as she saw the bedroom door open slowly and a sliver of light appear in the room as Jason sidled quietly into the room. The bed flexed gently as he sat down on the edge and turned to look at her, noticing that she was looking at him sleepily.

Jason looked directly at Jess and took hold of her hand which lay on top of the duvet. 'Jess, did my mum say something to you today to upset you?'

Jess let out a derisory laugh and snatched her hand away as she sat up, pushing the duvet off her so that it bunched up around her feet as she hugged her knees to her. 'No. She was the epitome of kindness to me and Ruby - until you were alone in the kitchen and then she made a comment about thinking it wouldn't work and that you surely wanted someone younger and without a kid in tow!' her voice raised an octave in distress, as she tried to articulate how she was feeling without shouting at him and waking Ruby up. 'And you agreed with her! What the hell is going on in your head, Jay? Have you changed your mind this quickly?'

'Exactly what did you hear?' Jason asked, feeling confused as to what she meant. He couldn't remember exactly what he'd said to make her think that he'd changed his mind. He ran his hand through his hair in confusion as he tried to recall exactly what he'd said.

'You said she was right, Jay! I trusted you when you said you loved me and that you wanted me and Ruby in your life and the minute we move in you tell your mother that I'm too old and have a kid! I heard you when I came down the stairs! Those are the exact words you said to her. How the hell am I supposed to feel, Jay? Even your bloody mother thinks it won't work!'

Comprehension dawned across Jason's features as he realised what she'd heard. 'I assume you didn't hang around to hear the rest I said then? You literally heard the words "you're right"? he gestured the words with his fingers.

'No, I was too upset and I felt like I was eavesdropping on your conversation.'

'Which you were.... don't you know you never hear good about yourself if you eavesdrop?' Jason cocked his head to one side as he studied her. 'In your case, if you'd have stuck around you might have heard the full story.'

'Which was?' Jess sniffed back a tear, thinking maybe she'd made the decision to move in with him too quickly. 

'Yes, I said she was right. But what I then said to her was even though she would have been right when I was in the band - especially the first time around. I'd gradually realised I didn't want to date twenty-somethings and that I wanted my own family - that family is you and Ruby.'

Jess gave him a small smile as she heard his words, 'but I'm still older than your usual girlfriends, Jay. She does have a point.'

'Jess, I love you as a person. To me you're stunning and isn't that all that matters?' He leant forward and pulled her into his arms, kissing her softly on the lips before drawing back and looking deeply into her eyes. 'Have you not noticed I can't keep my hands off you?'

She nodded shyly up at him and wound her arms around his neck. 'Yeah, I guess so... I like the fact that you can't.'

Jason laughed softly as he rested his cheek against her hair. 'Well, next week you'll realise how loved you are when it's your birthday. Me and Ruby plan to spoil you.' He tipped her chin up with his forefinger and kissed her again, a kiss which deepened as Jess felt a wave of relief run through her at his words. 'Now do you believe me?'

Jess gazed into his deep blue eyes, feeling lost in them as he waited for her answer. 'Yes. I believe you,' she whispered as they tumbled back on the bed together and Jason pulled her top over her head as she did the same to him.


	52. Chapter 52

The day before Jess's birthday dawned. Jason and Ruby had made Jess's special mug from Ruby and it had been secretly wrapped up along with Jason's presents and they were all waiting ready to be opened the following day. Ruby was feeling extremely excited to see Jess's reaction. Jason had already told Jess that she needed to make herself scarce that afternoon, so she had arranged to go over to her mum's house as Maggie said she had a birthday present over there for her to collect. Jess had also planned to drop Sally's album over at her house that afternoon too, once she'd been to her mum's house. She was worried it might get lost or damaged if it stayed with them too long. 

She left the flat at 2pm wondering what Jason and Ruby had up their sleeves. They'd been very secretive indeed on the laptop, talking together in low voices and once they'd finished they set off in the opposite direction to her as she left in her own car.

After stopping for coffee and a chat and also to pick up her birthday present at her mum's house, she set off on the twenty minute drive to Sally's house. After over-hearing Sally's views on her age and the fact that she had Ruby she wasn't exactly feeling very happy about the prospect of seeing her again. She planned to simply drop the album off and then go into Manchester to buy a few items of clothing for the summer. Jason had mentioned earlier that week about the possibility of a few days away somewhere in Europe, so that Ruby could go on an aeroplane and she knew if that was the case she really needed to buy some new summer clothes as a lot of the clothes she had would now be too big for her due to her weight loss.

Drawing up outside the house, she heaved a deep sigh and resolved to be pleasant, because as far as Sally was concerned Jess hadn't heard the conversation which had taken place in the kitchen.

As Jess walked up the front path Sally threw open the front door, a welcoming smile on her features - features that were so similar to Jason's, Jess noticed as she couldn't help but smile back.

'Would you like to come in for a drink?' Sally asked, a broad smile still on her face as she kissed Jess and pulled her in for an awkward hug.

'Well, ummm I..... Jess started, fishing around in her brain for an excuse not to stay. It was all very well meeting her with Jason the previous weekend, but she really didn't fancy a one to one meeting with her.

'Jess, I was really pleased when you messaged me to ask if I was in so you could drop the album over,' Sally took the album from her and tucked it under her arm before fixing Jess with her unwavering gaze. 'I was hoping we could have a chat....'

Jess's heart dropped into her boots and before she could help it her eyebrows shot up as if they had a life of their own at the thought of a woman to woman chat with Jason's mum. Surely this was going to be the point that Sally told her that she wasn't right for Jason, wasn't it? she thought to herself as she wondered how to respond when she said the words. She didn't think saying to "fuck off and mind her own business" would go down too well with neither Sally nor Jason if he got to hear. Instead, she looked at Sally and pasted on a smile as she replied as politely as she could muster. 'Oh, what about?'

'Come through to the kitchen,' Sally replied, ushering her into the hallway, so Jess felt like she had no choice. While Jess sat down at the kitchen table Sally busied herself making a pot of tea and putting some biscuits onto a plate.

While Sally made tea, Jess's gaze idly wandered around the room as she tried to imagine Jason growing up there. It seemed strange to think of him as a young boy and a teenager growing up when she hadn't known of him until he was a grown man. It was obvious it had been a happy childhood judging by the way he interacted with not only his mum, but also his step-dad.

As Sally set the plate of biscuits on the table and teapot onto the middle of the table, she smiled at Jess and sat down opposite her. 'I wanted to thank you.'

Jess's mouth dropped open in shocked surprise. 'Whatever for?'

Sally started to pour the teas and pushed the sugar bowl in Jess's direction. 'Jess, I'm going to be honest with you. When Jason told me he was seeing you and that Ruby was his pupil I thought he was mad. Jackie told me you weren't his usual type after she'd met you and mentioned Ruby was there too that day. I had already made my mind up that he was having some kind of mid life crisis. It all just seemed so out of character. That was before I met you,' she leant across the scrubbed wooden table and took Jess's hand in hers. 'I was wrong. Because it's quite obvious he's in love with you and adores Ruby.'

Jess looked down at Sally's hand holding hers and felt tears inexplicably appear in her eyes. 'Thank you. That means a lot because I actually thought you didn't like me.'

'God, no! Far from it! I wanted to thank you because it's the first time I've seen Jason truly happy for years. I was expecting yet another twenty-something and so I was just a bit shocked when I met you. Happy shocked. But shocked all the same.'

Jess wavered as she tried to decide whether to say anything about overhearing the conversation between her and Jason and decided it was pointless. Now that Sally had explained her thoughts, bringing up the conversation between the two of them in the kitchen was meaningless. 'And you don't mind that I have Ruby?' she asked, taking a sip of tea as she looked at Sally.

'Not at all. I always thought Jason would have kids of his own one day - he'd have been a good dad, but he clearly thinks a lot of Ruby.'

'And she adores him. Sometimes they gang up on me, because she can wind him around her little finger. I stand no chance!'

'Yeah, I noticed....' Sally laughed softly. 'I'm so glad you came over and we've had this chance to chat.'

'So am I,' Jess smiled warmly at Sally, thinking it was fortuitous that she'd decided to come over after all and that the summer wardrobe could wait for another time.

'Maybe if you'll let Ruby get to know us better she could come over for a sleep-over? I bet you and Jason don't get much time to be just the two of you? Well, unless her dad will want to have her to stay sometimes?' she added as an afterthought, worried that she may have asked for too much and overstepped the mark.

'No, Steve has no contact whatsoever - his choice. He knows nothing about Jason and we don't talk - well, not since he said he couldn't really have her anymore and wasn't prepared to pay maintenance. Everything has now been done through lawyers and I work extra to make up for the shortfall. I'm actually worried if he found out I was with Jay he'd be looking for a handout.'

Sally nodded in understanding. 'So you've had to be mum and dad for a while then?' she took a sip of her tea and shot Jess a sympathetic glance, thinking that she seemed a strong woman - one who wouldn't take any of Jason's crap when he had one of his funny moods.

'Yeah, something like that. That's why I didn't introduce him to Ruby as my boyfriend for quite a while. I can't have her hurt or confused. God knows, her dad did a good job of that!'

'And I get that. You were a close little unit before he came along?'

'We were...' Jess smiled as she thought back to the times before she'd met Jason, when it was just the two of them. It was hard work, but she wouldn't have changed it for the world.

'Yeah, me and Jason and his brothers and sisters were until I met Paul. He had to prove that he was serious at first.'

'And that's what I expected of Jay and he knew that.'

'And that's what he did?' Sally asked, feeling immense pride for Jason and the fact that he thought enough of Jess to take on another man's child - a man who wasn't worth being called Ruby's father even, by the sounds of things.

'Exactly. I'm so very lucky. Talking of which, I really should go home Sally. I dread to think what state the kitchen will be in when I get home.' Jess consulted her watch and was surprised to see she'd been gone over three hours. 'They think I don't know what they're up to.'

'What are they up to?' Sally asked, her interest piqued that Jason and Ruby were obviously up to something.

'Ruby left the laptop open and she'd left a cake recipe open. I pretended I hadn't seen it, but I suspect her and Jay are making me a cake for tomorrow.'

Sally laughed and patted Jess's hand. 'Yes, Jay told me it's your birthday tomorrow,' she got up and retrieved a silver package off the worktop across the other side of the kitchen. 'It's not much as I wasn't sure what you'd like. I hope you like it.' She placed it in front of Jess and took the teapot away to rinse it out.

Jess stood up and wandered over to wear Sally stood at the sink. 'I'm sure I will. Thanks for the chat.'

Turning around, Sally drew Jess into a tight hug, before pulling back to look at her, her hands on Jess's upper arms as she looked into her eyes. 'I meant what I said. Thank you for making Jason happy and the offer stands if Ruby wants to come over to get to know us you just have to ask. Ok?' 

Jess nodded. 'Thanks. That means a lot,' she leant forward and kissed Sally on the cheek.

Drawing up at the car park outside Jason's riverside flat twenty minutes later, Jess picked up the present from Sally, her fingertips touching the silver wrapping as she smiled to herself at their conversation. As she let herself into the flat a few minutes later she could smell the delicious aroma of home baking. Her stomach somersaulted in hunger as she realised it was 2pm and she hadn't eaten.

'Is that you, Jess?' Jason called out from the kitchen, as Ruby began scurrying around the kitchen trying to rapidly tidy away the evidence of what they'd been doing.

'Yes, sorry I was a while!' Jess called, making her way to the kitchen as Jason suddenly appeared and began to steer her away from it. 'Can I not get myself something to eat?' she asked playfully, trying to crane around him to see what was going on, but to no avail.

'You go in the lounge and I'll get lunch.' Jason suggested, his hand in the small of her back so that she was in no doubt that she wasn't to go near the kitchen. He was back a few minutes later, trying to look as innocent as humanly possible. 'Lunch is nearly ready. Ruby's in the kitchen waiting for you.'

Stepping into the kitchen, Jess smiled at Ruby. 'Have you been busy?'

Ruby nodded, suddenly realising that she hadn't put Jess's cake away as she quickly spread her arms out along the worktop to try to hide it, frantically trying to catch Jason's attention as she did so.

Jason side-stepped swiftly past Jess and stood alongside Ruby, so his back covered the space where the cake sat in all it's iced glory. 

'So what have you been doing?' Jess asked playfully, her eyes shining as she pretended she had absolutely no idea what they were up to.

'Drawing...' Jason replied quickly.

'Homework....' Ruby replied at the exact same moment and exchanged a panicked glance with Jason as if to ask why they hadn't thought of the same answer.

'Drawing and homework...' Jason replied innocently and winked at Jess naughtily.

'Drawing and homework, eh?' Jess shook her head at the both of them as they stood there a picture of innocence, the corners of her mouth twitching at the pair of them ganging together yet again. 'Well you might want to get rid of the icing sugar in your hair, Jay and the smudge of cream on your nose Ruby, before you sit down for lunch' Jess joked, sitting down at the kitchen table where Jason had placed their omelettes and trying not to laugh as the pair of them tried to frantically hide all the evidence thinking she couldn't see what they were up to.

Behind her, Jason and Ruby exchanged another glance. 'Do you think she saw?' Ruby whispered out of the corner of her mouth, so only he could hear as she lifted the cake carefully into a cake tin and fastened the lid on top of it.

'No, we hid it well I think.' Jason laughed softly as he wiped the cream off her face with a tea towel and chucked it in the linen bin quickly knowing damn well Jess knew exactly what was going on.


	53. Chapter 53

Jason woke up early the next morning and turned over to face Jess as she lay on her side fast asleep in the bed next to him. A long corkscrew of her red hair fell over her face as she shifted in the bed in her sleep and murmered something unintelligible. He lifted the strand of hair away from her face so he could look at her more clearly as she slept. The freckles which dusted across her nose were so cute when she smiled, he thought to himself as he willed himself not to touch her face. The longer he knew her, the more beautiful he thought she was and the more he was falling in love with her, he realised. It scared him just how much he felt for her. He'd loved Ruth all those years ago, but he hadn't been in love with her, he acknowledged. There was just something about Jess that made his heart beat faster and sometimes she only had to look at him and he wanted her. He lay there trying to work out what it was about her that had made him fall for her. It was just so strange considering she was the complete opposite of every other woman he'd dated, he mused. His thoughts then turned to her birthday presents and he hoped she wouldn't be angry that he'd well and truly spoilt her. He wanted her to know how special she now was to him. Jess's eyes flickered open and she saw that he was openly staring at her as he smiled at her. 'Happy birthday beautiful,' he whispered, wrapping his arms around her and raining kisses on her face.

Jess giggled and dropped a kiss on his lips as she swatted him playfully. 'I have morning breath, Jay. Stop it!'

'I don't care, Jess! I love you morning breath and all,' he cast his eyes in the direction of the clock. 'Do you reckon we've got time before Ruby gets up to have a quick one?' he said suggestively, his lips brushing against her ear as he felt her shiver against him. He loved that she couldn't hide the effect he had on her, he thought to himself. 'I've been laying here thinking how beautiful you are.'

Jess heard a bedroom door open and shut down the hallway and shook her head regretfully at him. 'Too late. She's up!'

'Oh bugger!' Jason flopped back on the pillows in mock defeat and laughed. 'She does it every bloody time.'

Jess got out of bed and opened the door to Ruby, laughing inwardly as she heard Jason muttering the words "down boy" to the erection which he was rapidly trying to squash down.

'Mummy! Happy birthday!' Ruby hopped about in excitement as Jess closed the bedroom door to give Jason time to compose himself before he saw Ruby.

'Thank you, Rubes!' Jess drew Ruby into a tight hug and dropped a kiss onto her dark head.

'So firstly me and Jason are going to make you breakfast in bed. And then we're going to give you your presents. And then we're going to go out for lunch and then Jason said he's taking you out for dinner while I go to stay at grandma's house!'

'Hmmm, should you be telling me all this Ruby?'

Ruby's face fell as she realised she had said too much. 'Well it was supposed to all be a surprise, but I guess I gave it away. Sorry.' Ruby immediately looked contrite as her bottom lip wobbled that she'd given everything away in her excitement.

'Don't worry, I'll keep quiet and not tell Jason,' Jess assured her, her mouth twitching at the corners as she tried to keep a straight face. 'So do I need to get back into bed and kick Jay out of bed so he can help you make my breakfast?'

'Yep!' Ruby nodded enthusiastically, still hopping about as she tried to keep her excitement under control. It was the first time she'd had a partner in crime to help her plan the perfect birthday for her mum.

Later that day, after they'd been out for lunch, Jason opened the front door to their flat and fixed her with a broad grin. 'You go into the lounge. Your surprises aren't finished yet!'

'Jay, whatever else can you do to surprise me? This is the best birthday I've ever had. You and Ruby have spoilt me today!'

'Wait and see..' Jason trailed off, as he and Ruby excitedly went into the kitchen.

Jess made her way into the lounge and sat down, her mind going over all the things the two of them had done for her already. Firstly, they had made her blueberry pancakes which Ruby had served to her, complete with little chefs hat and apron. Once she'd eaten, Jason had laid all of her presents on the bed in front of her and she'd opened them all one by one. When she got to her present from Ruby she'd swallowed down a lump in her throat as she turned the mug around in her hands and admired the photos which Ruby had chosen with Jason's help.

'Did you do this on your own, Ruby?' she'd asked, her hand touching Ruby's head as she asked the question.

Ruby shook her head. 'Jason helped me choose the photos and spell your name correctly.'

'It's beautiful. Though it seems kinda funny to see my whole name on there. Nobody calls me Jessamine.' Jess had grinned at Ruby and pulled her in for a tight hug, dropping wet kisses onto her face one after another, until Ruby managed to wriggle out of her tight embrace as she squealed in protest at the kisses.

'Now open Jason's!' Ruby pushed the packages towards Jess. She could hardly contain herself as she waited to see Jess's face at the beautiful necklace and earrings which she'd helped to choose.

Jess obediently opened the first of the two packages wrapped in silver paper, her hand going to her mouth in surprise when she saw the necklace and earrings nestled in the black velvet. 'Oh, wow! They are beautiful! They must have cost you a small fortune. I'd be too scared to wear them in case I lose or damage them!'

'I happen to think you're worth it, Jess.' Jason replied simply, as Jess threw her arms around his neck and gave him a resounding kiss on the lips. He'd then pushed the other package towards her, sitting back on the bed with his back resting against the headboard and his legs stretched out in front of him. 'Come on... open this one.'

Jess tore the paper off and let out a squeak of surprise as she saw a ticket wallet. Opening it up, she let out another as she glimpsed a confirmation for a trip to Lisbon with her's and Jason's names on them to depart at the beginning of August. 'Just me and you?' she asked, hardly believing her eyes at yet another surprise.

'Yes, me and you. I want you all to myself for a couple of nights,' he said quietly, winking at her sexily over the top of Ruby's head as she sat on the bed busily admiring Jess's new jewellery, so she didn't hear him saying that he wanted her all to himself.

'Where is Ruby going to go?' Jess asked, hoping she'd be able to find someone to look after Ruby as it was the kids summer holidays. The thought of spending a few nights without Ruby was putting all kinds of worrying thoughts in her head - something she knew Jason had never had to worry about.

'Sorted. Your mum is having her. I've already spoken to her.'

'You really have thought of everything, haven't you?' she'd whispered, thinking how truly lucky she was.

Jess was torn back to the present as she heard giggling and the sounds of footsteps outside the lounge door. Ruby threw open the door and Jason walked in with a birthday cake complete with lit candles on the top as they both sang Happy birthday to her at the top of their voices. Jess blew out the candles and then sat back to admire their handiwork. It was a Victoria sponge which Ruby knew was her favourite and she had to admit they'd done a good job on it. 'Thank you!' she said, her voice choking slightly that they'd managed to make such a beautiful cake.

'It's got white chocolate icing and raspberries in the middle. Jason helped me make it.' Ruby said, in a conspiratorial whisper.

'Is that what you were up to yesterday?' Jess asked, grinning as Ruby nodded her head. 'Well I guess I'd better see if it tastes as good as it looks, won't I?' Jess asked, hugging Ruby tightly to her and shooting Jason a loving glance across the room.

'Can we watch one of Jason's concert DVD's while we eat our cake?' Ruby asked excitedly. Now that she'd seen Sally's album of photos, she wanted to learn more about his past. 'Can I watch The Circus one?'

Jason flushed in embarrassment. 'I hate watching myself, Ruby. The others are more talented than me and I hate seeing the moments where I hit a bum note or look unsure of myself.'

'So I'm not allowed to watch it because you think the others are better than you? That doesn't sound fair!' Ruby stuck out her bottom lip in annoyance as she still stood there holding the cake on its plate. 'I want to see the concert. Sally was showing me photos of you on that elephant. It looked SO cool!'

'She has a point, Jay. From the videos I've seen your thoughts that you're not as good as the others is all in your head. Get over yourself, Jay. Ruby wants to watch you to see what you used to do before teaching and I'm sure she's not going to critique your performance and give it marks out of ten,' Jess said, trying to make him see that Ruby was too young to notice the flaws he thought were obvious to everyone. She knew Ruby adored him and she would more than likely think he was the best anyway, such was her hero worship of him.

Jason sighed a gusty sigh as he knew he was beaten. 'When you put it like that I can't really argue, can I? Though would you mind if I disappeared off to the gym while you watch? I just can't watch myself,' he knew that one day he might be able to watch himself without being judgemental, but he just couldn't do it that day. The feelings of inadequacy haunted him - even now all these years later.

'Of course, Jay. I understand.' Jess looked up at him as he dropped a kiss on her lips and caressed her neck with his fingertips as he spoke quietly so Ruby couldn't hear him. 'Just make sure you skip Relight my fire - it's towards the end. She's not old enough to see that.'

Jess nodded and grinned at him. 'Can I watch it on my own at some point?' she winked, so he knew she'd already seen it at some point and had enjoyed watching it.

'Yeah, no problem. I might have the outfit kicking around somewhere if you want me to find it? Rumour has it that the ladies liked that one,' he chuckled gently and ducked out of the room to leave them in peace before she could answer him.

Once he'd been to the gym and Ruby and Jess had finished watching the DVD Jason drove Ruby to her grandma Maggie's house so that Jess could get ready. He'd booked a table at the ground floor bar/restaurant Pinya at the Catalan restaurant Tast. It was more relaxed than the main restaurant and he thought it would be nice to not have to dress up too much. He had something he really needed to discuss with her that he'd been thinking about over the last couple of days. Being on their own would give him that opportunity.

Relaxing back in the roll top bath in the bathroom, Jess sighed a contented sigh as she looked out at the lights of Manchester spread out below and as far as the eye could see, almost like a giant Christmas tree. Sometimes she had to pinch herself at the life she now had, she thought to herself and smiled happily. She took a sip of the Prosecco which Jason had poured for her before going out with Ruby. Suddenly, from out of nowhere, the thought invaded her mind that it was all going too well. A strange sense of unease ran through her body - almost foreboding that something was going to happen to turn her world upside down. She shivered and sank further into the water, her toe circling the tap as a drip of water quivered, poised ready to drop in the bath, as she tried to make sense of what the hell had caused her to feel the wave of fear which had dissipated as quickly as it appeared.

Jason let himself back into the flat. He'd dropped Ruby off and immediately made his way home to get changed. He wanted to make the most of being together just the two of them as they didn't get much time alone.

Jess heard the door bang shut and Jason's footsteps echo through the flat. 'I'm in here!' she called out, trying to shuffle her irrational thoughts to the back of her mind as his head appeared around the door and he gave her a wicked grin. 'Are you going to get in with me?' she laughed, luxuriating in the warm bath as he began to undress in double quick time.

'Oh yes! Shuffle up and I'll get in behind you.'

Jess moved forward to give Jason room to slide in behind her. He wrapped his arms around her and began to tip-toe his fingertips across her breasts and around her nipples. She immediately felt her insides turn over with lust at his touch and the thought ran through her mind to tell him to cancel the dinner reservation and they just spend the night in bed together. 'What time is dinner booked for?' she twisted around to look at him as he began kissing her shoulder in an attempt to distract her.

'7.30...' Jason trailed off, as he swept his hand over the soft skin of her belly and began to kiss her neck in the exact spot he knew she liked being kissed.

'Jay, we don't have time. It's nearly 6.30.' Jess replied, trying to keep a sensible head. She wondered what it was about him that made her putty in his hands, as she desperately tried to ignore what he was doing as his fingers trailed onto her thighs and carried on downwards and the evidence of an erection pressed into her back. 

'We can be late.....' he whispered as he pushed her hair to one side so that it fell in waves over her shoulder, so he could get to her neck better. 'You like that?' he asked as he kissed along the top of her shoulders and along the back of her neckline and felt her shiver under his lips.

'Jay, you know I do,' she moaned softly as one hand cupped her breast, his thumb circling her nipple over and over as his fingers on his other hand began to stroke insistently between her legs and disappeared inside her.

'Jess, I love you,' he murmered, running his tongue along her ear and feeling her shiver again.

'I love you too. But we really ought to start getting ready to go out.' Jess said, trying to drag them back to the present, before she lost all sense of reasonable thought.

'Be quiet and just relax. They won't turn us away and if they do, well we'll just come back here and I'll make love to you again,' his mouth twisted up in a crooked smile as she turned around to look at him and their mouths met in a long, sweet kiss. 

'Again? Are you planning on doing that to me now?' Jess asked playfully as she pulled away and looked directly at him, knowing by the look on his face that's exactly what he was intent on doing.

'Yes. If you want me to?'

Jess tilted her head to one side and studied him as if he'd totally lost the plot. 'Do you really need to ask that? Surely you know what you do to me?'

'I have half an idea.' He remarked, as his mouth returned to hers and their tongues began to dance together and Jess moaned softly against his mouth, encouraging him to continue.


	54. Chapter 54

Please note there is a fairly graphic sex scene at the beginning*

The restaurant was crowded when they arrived just over fifteen minutes late. As they entered, they were greeted by a waiter who fixed them with a wide smile. 'Sorry, we're a bit late. Something came up.' Jason looked at him, complete innocence written across his face as he heard Jess suppress a snort of laughter as she knew exactly what he was referring to.

As they sat down at the table opposite each other, Jess wagged her finger at him. 'That was very naughty of you to do that! I didn't know where to look!'

'But it was true.' He took her hand in his as their waitress placed a menu in front of them and disappeared again. 'I'm sorry, I shouldn't have embarrassed you,' he said apologetically. 

Jess shrugged nonchalantly. 'It's fine. It was quite funny because only me and you knew what you were on about.' 

The waitress re-appeared with an IPAD a few moments later and took their order. She was back a few minutes later with a bottle of champagne which she rapidly opened and poured them each a glass, before disappearing once again.

'Happy birthday, Jess.' Jason said softly as they clinked glasses. 'How's the head now?' he caressed her cheek as he looked closely at her temple, where a plaster with unicorns emblazoned on it was currently adorning her head - the only plaster he could find in the flat from a packet which he'd bought the previous year, just in case any of his nieces or nephews hurt themselves when they were staying with him.

'It doesn't hurt as much as it did earlier. I didn't think it would stop bleeding.'

'Me neither. You didn't half give me a scare, Jess. Maybe the bath wasn't one of my best ideas, eh?'

'I wasn't complaining. Well, until I cracked my head open on the tap,' she smiled ruefully, her fingertips touching the plaster gingerly as she thought back to what had taken place in the bathroom earlier. 

'I don't even know how it happened.' Jason shook his head as he tried to remember exactly what had happened to cause the accident. 

'I do....' Jess's voice trailed away, as she thought back to how it had happened. Her eyes dropped to the table as she flushed in embarrassment. Just the thought of it was making her feel all hot and flustered and she wasn't about to spell it out in the middle of a crowded restaurant. 

At first she'd been sitting with her back against his chest, her neck turned so they could kiss. She'd reached around and taken his erection in her hand, her hand moving up and down the length of it as his fingers moved in and out of her at the same pace. Turning around, so she was kneeling between his legs in the warm water, she raised herself up slightly and began to kiss him as she felt him grow harder in her hand as she stroked him up and down. She pressed her chest against his so that he could slide his fingers back inside, his thumb sweeping around in circles as she rocked against his fingers, desperate to take them as deep as she could. The whole time her hand was moving up and down, her thumb mirroring what he was doing and stroking the end of him in circles and driving him to distraction. Pulling her up, so her breasts were in front of him he sucked at her nipples one by one, grinning as her moans reached fever pitch and she began to climax around his fingers, wave after wave as it ebbed and flowed through her body like a thunderbolt.

'Jess I love you,' he murmered, as their lips met again and their tongues tangled together. 

'I love you too, Jay,' she whispered softly as they pulled apart and she immediately began to kiss a trail down his body until she reached his happy trail. He lifted his hips, desperate to feel her mouth on him, a sigh hissing through his gritted teeth as her tongue and hands continued downwards as she sucked up and down, until he felt like he could take no more.

'Jess, stop. I want to be inside you. Now!'

Jess hesitated for a moment. Despite the fact that they'd now slept together maybe a dozen times, she still felt shy about verbalising exactly what she wanted. It was like an unwritten taboo with Steve to ever talk about what she liked, so it was no wonder they pretty much always did it with him on top.

'Jess, you don't need to be shy with me,' Jason assured her, instantly guessing she was toying in her head whether to take the lead in what she wanted. 'I just want you. At this moment in time I don't care how,' he tipped her chin up and kissed her gently.

'I want you this way,' she said, chewing her bottom lip as she turned around and got on her knees, her hands either side of the taps as she heard the swish of water as he moved behind her. His hands went either side of her waist as he nudged her knees further apart and slowly inched himself into her, luxuriating for a moment as he felt himself completely buried inside her. 'Fuck, that feels good,' he murmered, his lips against the curve where her neck and shoulder met as his hand tangled through her hair and then held onto a thick hank of it so she couldn't move too far away from him.

Jess couldn't even trust herself to answer as she shifted her hands and moved herself so that their bodies were as close as humanly possible as he began to thrust in and out. One hand gripping her shoulder tightly and the other in her hair as they began to move together. Her senses reeled as she felt his fingers move from her hair and down between her legs as she felt the unmistakable feeling of her climax building in her belly as he pushed into her as hard as he dared. Jess rocked herself against his fingers, her breath coming in small pants as their pelvises met over and over, shockwaves running through her every time he thrust into her. With an almost primal cry from her mouth, everything seemed to detonate at once as she heard Jason's guttural groans against her ear as he exploded deep inside her and her own climax washed over her in wave after wave of pure white hot pleasure. 

As they both stilled, their hearts returning to their normal heartbeat, Jason cupped one breast in his hand and angled her head so he could kiss her. 'Jess, that was fucking amazing. I think I just went to bloody heaven and back there.'

'Me too,' Jess whispered, not wanting to break the moment as she felt him pull out of her. Lifting a hand away from the edge of the bath which she'd been gripping tightly onto only a moment earlier as they made love, she made to get out of the bath, her legs still shaking like jelly. Her foot slipped on the bottom of the bath as she went to stand up and with a loud crack her head connected with the tap. The next thing she remembered was Jason holding a cold cloth against her forehead and blood everywhere. It had taken a while to stop the bleeding and the bath water was tepid and a vivid red in colour by the time he'd let her get out. Her head was aching a bit, but she was determined they should still go out for dinner - even though Jason asked her a few times if she felt up to going out.

The waitress appeared with their starters, pulling Jess's thoughts away from earlier in the evening and what had happened in the bathroom. She laid small dishes in front of them containing Red pepper croquettes and prawns and after topping up their glasses, she discreetly disappeared to leave them to talk.

Jason cleared his throat and looked directly at her. 'Jess, there was something I wanted to talk to you about. I've been doing a lot of thinking.' 

'Should I be worried?' Jess joked, the smile dying on her lips as she realised that he was trying to discuss something of great importance with her. She took a bite of the croquette, offering the dish to him so he could take one and then waited for him to speak again.

'I was thinking about the flat. If this is serious between us then a flat isn't the most sensible place to live, is it? Ruby needs a garden - and not a communal one. A proper one.'

'But you love that flat! I couldn't expect you to sell it just because of Ruby and I!'

Jason shrugged as if it really didn't matter to him. 'I could rent it out. I want to buy a proper home for us, Jess.'

'Jay, I'm really not comfortable with you doing all this for us. We've only been together five months. And probably only three of them seriously.' Jess put down her fork and looked at him, wondering whether this was just a whim or if he'd really thought it through.

Jason was just about to open his mouth to speak when he saw the evidence that they'd been spotted by a crowd of giggling girls in the periphery of his vision, who obviously recognised him. His heart sank at the thought that even now, all these years later people still recognised him. There was a flash of light and he knew their photo had now been taken and no doubt would be all over social media within moments and felt furious at the invasion of privacy. Two of the girls got up and made their way over, giggling and elbowing each other as they obviously tried to decide who was going to approach him first.

'Um, are you Jason from Take That?' the younger girl, asked timidly as she totally ignored Jess sitting there opposite him. Now that she was standing there in front of him and he was staring coldly back at her she felt her bravery dissipate rapidly.

'No. Not anymore.' Jason picked up his glass of champagne and stared unflinchingly at her, his eyes like flint.

'You are. My friend said you are. You WERE in the band.'

'I was. But not now.'

'Can we have an autograph?' the girl asked, trying to appeal to his better nature. She shoved a crumpled serviette in front of him with a pen balancing precariously on top of it and grinned nervously at him as she waited patiently.

'I don't think so. No. I'm out for the evening with my girlfriend and I'm no longer with the band,' he pushed the serviette back in her direction and turned away to indicate their conversation was over.

'Well a photo then?' the girl persisted, totally ignoring the fact that he didn't want to do as she asked.

'You took a photo without my permission already didn't you? Delete it now!' his voice raised a notch as his temper began to simmer and he felt all the old feelings of being public property come to the surface - a feeling he hadn't had in years.

'I didn't!'

'Give me your phone and prove it!' he snapped, holding out his hand to take it from her and fixing her with an angry stare. The girl visibly shrank under his stare, as her friend simply stood next to her looking on helplessly.

'You owe us a photo! We paid to come to see two of your concerts. And we paid a lot of money too!' the girl snapped back in response.

Jess sat back in her chair, completely gobsmacked at the way fans seemed to think he owed them a piece of him - just because they'd been to a concert in the past.

'And people like you are the reason I gave it up! Invading my fucking privacy. Thinking I fucking owe you something. Now delete that photo like I've kindly asked you to do!'

The girl huffed a gusty sigh and keyed in her passcode, swiftly deleting the photo of him and Jess in deep conversation. 'There. Done! You always were the one I liked the least anyway.'

'Yeah, they all say that and I don't give a shit.' Jason flinched imperceptibly, indicating to Jess who knew him better than most, that the comment had stung - even if he pretended it hadn't. 

Jess cleared her throat to indicate she was actually there. 'Ladies, we're out for a special occasion. Can you please leave us in peace? Please...'

'So....you were asking me if I was sure about buying a house. A home for us three? Jason asked, as the two girls disappeared back to their party. He reached across the table and took her hand in his. 'Yes, I'm sure. Jess, I love you and I want this more than anything. You complete the part of me that was missing for so long.'

'Ok. Then I'm happy.' She stroked her thumb across his hand. 'Does that hurt when people say things like that to you? You know, about preferring the others?'

Jason sighed and took a sip of his champagne. 'Yeah, it does. I used to pretend it didn't, but it did. It was constant - even down to the way interviewers couldn't even be bothered to research which one of us was Howard and which was Jason - because we were second fiddle. The dancers!' his mouth twisted sadly as he tried to articulate how he'd felt over the years. 'I was the one that sang and everyone pissed off to the toilet.'

'Do you actually have any idea of how talented you are, Jay? None of the others could have put that much emotion into Wooden Boat. It would have been an Elton John type love song if Gary had sung it. If Mark had sung How did it come to this he'd have needed to stop halfway through the long lines to take a breath. You did that in one bloody go! No mistakes. Do you know how proud I felt of you standing there singing your heart out at The Circus? It was like you were singing just to me! You have that inate ability to do that, Jay!'

'What did Ruby think?' he asked shyly, pushing the dish away half eaten.

'What do you think? She thought you were the best. The others were YOUR supporting act as far as she was concerned.'

'Well I guess that's all that matters, isn't it?' he gave her a little smile, his twinkling eyes betraying just how touched he was at her words.

Exactly Jay!' 

The waitress appeared to take their plates away and Jess used the opportunity to go to the ladies. After using the bathroom she checked her appearance in the mirror, re-applying her soft coloured bronze lipstick. As she did so a strange wave of apprehension rippled through her again - the same as earlier in the bathroom and she shivered. Making her way back to the table, Jess tried to arrange her face into a smile of happiness as Jason looked up at her and touched her hand lightly as she touched his shoulder and walked past to get to her seat.

'Everything ok, Jess? Did one of those girls say something?' he asked, knowing something was up. Her smile didn't light up her eyes like it usually did.

'Just a bit of a headache. That's all.'

'Do you want to go home?'

'No, let's have our main meal and then we'll go. I really need to ask you something....'

He looked at her in interest as he wondered what was on her mind. She seemed shaken by something. 'Fire away...' he took her hand in his again.

'I've had a couple of weird episodes today. They're confusing and frightening me.'

'In what way?' Jason felt, slightly worried at her expression.

'Well, like something is going to happen. Almost like deja-vu or that this will all be snatched from me. This happiness. Does that make sense?'

Jason nodded slowly. 'I believe it's our self conscious rather than something bad. It plays tricks on you. Telling you that you shouldn't be happy. I don't get it now, but I used to when I first got back together with the boys.'

'It's probably my over-active imagination then.' Jess said feeling slightly relieved, but still needing his reassurance about the one thing which really scared her. 'But I do need you to do something for me. For Ruby.'

'Anything Jess.'

'Be there for her?'Jess was visibly struggling to verbalise what she meant and she could feel tears threatening for some weird reason. She just had strange feeling that she needed to say it in the here and now and make sure he understood.

Jason's nose wrinkled in confusion. 'I am. I love her - you know that.'

'No. I don't mean that. God, this is so hard to explain. If anything happens to me. Be there for her. Please don't let her go to Steve. I need you to promise me?' she looked beseechingly at him, instinctively knowing she was confusing the hell out of him.

'Is something wrong? You're worrying me, Jess?

'No, there's nothing wrong. I'm not ill. I just need you to promise me you'll intervene if anything ever happens. She loves you like a father.'

Jason nodded slowly. 'You have my word, Jess.'

'Good. That's a load off my mind Jay,' she leant over and kissed him softly on the lips. 'I just want her to be happy.'

This story is continuing as a sequel called All that matters to me.


End file.
